My vagine is itching like mad.

[BupcakesandCunting]

Namechanged for obvious reasons. :(

My minge is itching like buggery. No discharge/whiffiness, just a very itchy vulva (as per namechange ) Have done a Caneten pessary on saturday and been applying the cream but nothing is working.

Suggestions please? And don't say "wash yer minge"

dearie me for your itchy bajingo....and please use caution with the tea tree, a few drops in a bath should suffice, applied neat it'll singe your nose hairs off (yes....from all the way down there!)

and I am laughing as i read this which would fry any worms travelling from your arsa to your vagine as worms unravelling your arse and vagine :D

Do u wear sanitary pads/panty liners? They can soak up any natural moisture and make the area dry and irritated.

Embarrasing as it is, I'd go flash your gash at a dr and get it properly treated straight away rather than trying out different suggestions and prolonging the irritation.

Cervical ectropion?

If the pessary hasn't sorted it then this might be the cause.

In my case I'm not on the pill, nor do I bleed after sex, but I have had the intense itching, dysuria (thought it was a urine infection), discharge and oedema. It gets worse the more run down I get. I used the canestan cream in the big turkey baster syringe and it made no difference to the itching. Eventually I had a smear test and there is was, winking at the nurse. She told me it could be caused by rough sex, childbirth, abortion and sticking things up your flue.

After a nasty flare up after Christmas (lasted 8 days) I am using it as a reason to change my diet and lifestyle as I don't want a soldering iron up my chuff to burn it away.

It is not possible to get worms in your vagine.

Find a small mirror and assume the position.

Examine fanjo for worms (they will wave at you) or mystery white spots.

White patches = lichen sclerosis, which needs some steroid cream pronto.

Peach Activia?!

I'm also loving how from now on, proof of non-trollery will go 'River of sweetcorn, cube of poo, cuntworms'.

DD1 had threadworms recently... pulled one out of her vagine

Ahem. Really sorry to hear about your problème...

Really? You can get worms in your vagine?????

lol nice one cupcakes lol

I mean Bupcakes
bloody autocorrect

I havent made it to the end of the thread yet, just had to at am PMSL at the name change fail, the vagine and the tea tree oil straight onto the flappage area

That's blue Monday sorted then...

I want Vagine to rhyme with Tagine - please say it does.

Try Eurax cream. It is for all kinds of itchyness and my lovely GP says fine for flaps. Problem with Canesten is that if it isn't thrush, you are doing nothing at all and the more you scratch the more you spread IYSWIM. The Eurax will sting for a nano-second and then stop the itch so at least you have a fighting chance to see if it will clear up by itself.

Perhaps there should be a top ten name-change-fails of all time - you'd certainly get at least number 2

I want Vagine to rhyme with Tagine - please say it does.

Try Eurax cream. It is for all kinds of itchyness and my lovely GP says fine for flaps. Problem with Canesten is that if it isn't thrush, you are doing nothing at all and the more you scratch the more you spread IYSWIM. The Eurax will sting for a nano-second and then stop the itch so at least you have a fighting chance to see if it will clear up by itself.

Perhaps there should be a top ten name-change-fails of all time - you'd certainly get at least number 2

oops sorry for double post

Oh my, this has made my day

Now, on the serious front, OP, I second the no to pantyliners. There was a time I went from UTI to thrush infection every 2-3 weeks A doctor told me to stop using them as they either keep things too moist down there or take out all the natural moisture, as mummy2maisie said.

A big NO to shower-gel as well. I'm like you, just water doesn't seem enough, I use Pears soap or any non-fragrance glicerine soap.

I also second the NO to the peach activia. It must contain some sugar and any nasty thing wandering around will thrive on that

Lastly, do NOT put tea tree oil directly on your vagine. Unless you want to scream.

Oh, you might have solved the problem that came up on a thread the other day, of what to call a woman's genitals that doesn't sound twee or too medical. Vagine is just PERFECT! IMHO

SlightlyJaded yes - it's definitely pronounced like that - va-zheeeeen

It's most certainly not 'va-jine'

@ 'va-jine', like 'imagine'

Is there some kind of evil code built into MN that sabotages anyone trying to namechange for the purpose of posting about their fanjo?

It happened to UCM, it happened to Bupcakes...

It could happen to YOU

Yes, I think it is pronounced "va-zheeeeen" Imagine if the lady out of the Fry's Turkish Delight advert from the '80s said vagine. That's how you say it.

Just bathed my flaps in a tea tree bath. All seems calm at the minute. Still cannot stop thinking about fucking cuntworms, though. :(

Is it full of Eastern promise?

What? My minge?

Full of worms, more likely.

In honour of this superb thread, I have decided to release the saga in comic-book form, entitled Fire Down Below - MN To The Rescue:

1. Miss Cunting was suffering from a delicate condition, so she self-medicated with a proprietary brand of fanjita de-fungaliser

. . . . . =+{fannysten}~~~

2. Within a couple of days, it was apparent that the treament had failed - and she was left with an under-dimple more scrofulous than a sack of poison ivy

. . . . . ,,,,, < frantic scratching

3. It was all to no avail; there was nothing else for it - the lovely ladies of MN must be consulted for their erudite advice - but only after a shame-saving name change, of course!

. . . . . taptaptaptappitytap ^ >> /tinterweb/

4. But oh - what was this? An almighty fuck-up in the technology led to the name change failing to take effect. Miss Cunting's name was there for all to see

. . . . .

5. Plus an unfortunate Gallic typographic mishap in the thread title

. . . . . > > /VAGINE/

6. Just as she was considering ending it all, she was distracted by the sound of mirth from her computing device

. . . . . ¬ - - - -

7. Instead of treating her like a pariah and an outcast, the lovely ladies loved Miss Cunting even more for her glorious faux pas - and also suggested cunt worms lots of home remedies to put an end to her minge misery

. . . . . ~ ~ ~ ~

8. For it was the funniest fucking thing they'd read all year - and laughter is the best medicine, after all

. . . . . - - - -

THE END

Bloody brilliant Talc!

Sudocrem does work UCM