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Original poster

Teachers. Admit it. This is a perk of the job isn't it?

334 replies

pagwatch · 16/12/2010 13:22

Just got dds work home as she finishes this week.

In the bag are some things that are mounted and have clearly been on the wall either in the classroom or (gulp) the main corridors or halls.

In one she provides a slice of homelife which is mighty embarrassing and makes us sound like total wankers. She also talks about drinking wine. She is 8.

You find these things don't you, with a silent shout of glee. I have believed this since my mother told me about turning up at my school and on the wall was a picture I had drawn of her and dad 'playing in the bath'.

Come on. You might as well admit it....

and

OP posts:

superv1xen · 16/12/2010 14:30

haha this thread is great :o

i remember at about 10, writing about my summer holiday in wales at school and saying how it was great on holiday as mummy and daddy took us to the pub every evening and daddy was really funny when he was drunk :o

snowflake69 · 16/12/2010 14:32

I work in a nursery and my daughter comes with me. She is always saying embarassing things about me like 'daddy hits mummy and he goes on time out' which is definitely not true at all. She always sees me drinking cans of fizzy pop as well and thinks its beer cans. She is always telling parents/staff my mummy drinks lots of beer!

Its even worse when its your child and you work there.

DanceInTheDark · 16/12/2010 14:34

I used to tell everyone my dad was a policeman and he painted aeroplanes. It was kind of true! He worked for aerospace and started off in the paint shop and then worked as security!

TwilaAndTinsel · 16/12/2010 14:36

Pag this is a very funny and distracting thread but I really want to know about what DD said to make you all sound like wankers. And about the wine too. Sorry

TwilaAndTinsel · 16/12/2010 14:37

Ah x-post if that is indeed all you are going to say...

pawsnclaws · 16/12/2010 14:42

Ds1 did a project on the senses in reception, which included a list of smells he liked and smells he didn't. How proud we were to see that he apparently liked the smell of bogs. The TA assured me it was muddy bogs not the other kind!

Friend of mine's DD wrote in her news book that at the weekend mummy and daddy went to a party, daddy was sick in the plant pot when they got home and when they got up in the morning he had a pocket full of cooked chicken drumsticks from the buffet.

TwilaAndTinsel · 16/12/2010 14:54

Ha haaaa at Pawsnclaws and the unfortunate Dad!

nymphadora · 16/12/2010 14:58

Dd2 had some classic ones. I've kept her book cos I was in stitches at parents evening. Though there were a few mentions of dh ( when we first got together) having sleepovers

Original poster

pagwatch · 16/12/2010 15:04

Not as bad as some of these actually...

I realise your imaginations may make it worse so..

It was just ' what you did on holiday' exercise. We had treaty holiday which included a limo from the airport.

Dd has slighty quaint writing style and rather than sounding ' it was bloody brilliant' it sounded a bit..... ' fabuolous dahhhlings, just fabulous...

She included drinking wine and champagne although I seem to recall bottles of water.
She had a more pimped out experience than I.

OP posts:

pawsnclaws · 16/12/2010 15:09

Oh Lord how could I forget what my own brother said in class!

Picture the scene - primary school 1977. A whole bunch of five year olds being asked what they want to do/be/have when they grow up. DB told the entire class and teacher that his ambition when he grew up was to have "an enormous willy like my Dad."

The teacher told my Mum .

Poledra · 16/12/2010 15:10

ROFL, pawsnclaws. I bet your Dad was very proud of himself after that

Original poster

pagwatch · 16/12/2010 15:11

Rofl!

Did your dad put him up to it?

OP posts:

pawsnclaws · 16/12/2010 15:15

I remember my Mum's cheeks scarlet with embarrassment - we laugh about it now but she was quite shy and prudish then. My Dad was met in the hallway with one of those We Need To Talk looks.

I think my Dad's exact words were "nice one, son." Nowadays social services would probably be called!

shongololo · 16/12/2010 15:23

I'm a leader in a youth organisation, dealing with 6-8yos. Favourites...

On a "healthy eating" visit to Sainsburys, one pointed to the top shelf and said..."my daddy reads that one with the girls boobies on". Later that evening, when questioned on what would be a healthy drink, he said "Baileys". Oh how we did tease his mum about the family porn and booze habits! :D

We also had a wee girl tell us that "mum does nothing except sit on the sofa and drink wine"

ANd a boy who old us, on a visit to the police cells, that his daddy had picked up his mummy from here..

Original poster

pagwatch · 16/12/2010 15:26

I love these..

OP posts:

TheSmallClanger · 16/12/2010 15:28

I've shared this before, but DD once convinced most of her class, including the teacher, that she was the annoying little French girl from the Petit Filous adverts.

I'm not sure how it began, or what gave her the idea, but apparently they put makeup on her to make her look a bit different. She did look like that little girl, though.

When she first started school, DH didn't work full time due to illness, so she was quite fond of telling people that he spent a lot of the time lying on the sofa eating Coco Pops.

GordianKnot · 16/12/2010 15:29

Mate of mine had her office temporarily moved to the same road as recycling area. I asked her som if he knew what mummy did.

You guessed it " my mum works at the tip"

GordianKnot · 16/12/2010 15:31

I did a lesson with year 8 once and were doing about reflection. I said it's like mid life crises when you reasses life. They then ALL told me how their parents mlcs had manifested themselves

Vairvrevealing.

shongololo · 16/12/2010 15:34

embarrassingly, my DD (year 6 at the time) told her friend (in earshot of a teacher) that she had bought a vibrator off e-bay...

I'm sure the entire staff looked at me differently from there on.

I should point out that I don't e-bay.

Dumbledoresfairy · 16/12/2010 15:40

I still remember with embarrassment writing when I was 7/8 about my cat walking between the bras on the landing. I meant the bars (balustrade) on the landing. I bet my teacher smiled at that one.

Funnily enough, as a teacher, I can't remember reading anything funny. I do enjoy reading my children's writing though, not for the embarrassing details they reveal, but just their quirky view of our lives.

Galena · 16/12/2010 15:54

We were doing a craft activity once in my Y3 class and one little girl turned to me and said 'My daddy has terrible problems with wind.' I really couldn't look him in the eye after that!

madav · 16/12/2010 16:59

I had a couple of policemen visit for a theft (from me) and they stood and talked to me while I was making tea in the kitchen. Youngest son stood and stared at the younger one for ages and he smiled and said "alright son?"

He pointed to the guy's handcuffs and said "My mum's got a pair of those! I'll go get them."

The younger guy went bright red, and the older guy that was standing talking to me could hardly speak for trying to keep in his laughing. I didn't know where to look.

Can only imagine the conversation down at the station when they got back......

And yes, I did have a pair.......

GordianKnot · 16/12/2010 17:02

My son (5) told his teacher " my dads moving to new York as he has problems with his sleep"

The teacher wasn't a Wombats fan

Theantsgomarching · 16/12/2010 17:03

gordian I don't get it

GordianKnot · 16/12/2010 17:04

It's a song.

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