lost in translation... is this the most embarrassing comment someone could make in all innocence?

[oricella]

Posted this before in bilingual, but it deserves a wider audience..

My dad recently stated that my lovely 2 year old was acting like a cat, 'giving heads'.... (the Dutch expression 'kopjes geven' describes the way cats nudge you with their head)

That one had me under the table... (and blush at having to try and explain to him why!)

Anyone else have any good mistranslations?

We went to a michelin star restaurant in France and asked for water, the waitress asked what kind of water we wanted and dh (british) very confidently said: "sans plomb".

My brother and I (both french) collapsed in laughter so much we couldn't even explain it to him, another english friend of ours also at the table with us figured it out after a good 5 minutes. "I think you just asked for petrol!!"

"sans plomb" means unleaded petrol!

What he meant to say was "sans gaz" (which is not correct in french either by the way, he got confused with the spanish "aqua sin gas", what you want to say in French is "eau plate").

The waitress was ever so professional and did not flinch and got us the right water.

A few years ago I worked in a sandwich shop where you had to wear an apron, they had two sizes, big or small. On a particularly busy day there was only a big one left for me to use and being a short arse I was looking at the other staff to try and swap it.
I loudly asked "Tom": "Do you have a big one or a small one??". Cue everybody (including customers) laughing!

the classic one in France is always to announce after a meal that you are a pregnant cow (when you really wanted to say that you are full)

American relative, a teacher, told all her English to "stop talking and sit on their fannies"

English pupils

sitting at the table with dp, mil and 13yr old nephew. I wanted to say that i love eating figs in italian. instead i ended up saying a love eating vagina (figa).

My exH spoke English as his 3rd language and had some problems with spelling occasionally. He had an evening job which he'd usually left for by the time I got in from work: one evening I came home to find a lovely little note asking if I could 'cock' him a cottage pie. A recipe for Loretta Bobbit, I think!

yy to the fannies; I only became aware of how different american and english english are when the single canadian volunteer in a group of mostly Brits asked if anyone had seen his fanny bag

I heard of a girl in a solicitors office where my mum worked leaving a big note on the photocopier 'please remove clits before using the photocopier' signed with her name. I'm pretty sure she was referring to clips :)

Have raised an eyebrow or two by suggesting that DP put the baby in the box - for some reason that's how in the Netherlands they refer to a play pen ( itsjustafleshwound I'd never suggest putting the baby in the doos, that's what they would come out of )

I once said in spanish that I needed a frying pan that didn't show up under my dress. {puzzled face from shop assistant]. my spanish was good at that point, I just had a wee black hole in my brain for sartén and sosten.

My friend is German. She recently took her 3yo DS to see the nurse. The nurse was trying to explain about vaccinations, and my friend replied with 'he doesn't need a prick, he already has one'. She was complaining to me outside the school that the nurse was very unprofessional and snorting at her and she couldn't understand why...I had to explain!

I should clarify - my friend meant her DS was already u to date with his vaccinations,but didn't realise the connotations of 'prick'...

Conversation on Twitter reminded me of another one.

As an 18 yo on my first trip to Germany on a youth exchange trip, I would order a "dry white wine, bitte".

It took me a couple of days before I worked out why the waitress kept bringing me three glasses of wine.

American auntie announced to a packed tube station that she kept all her money in her fanny (fanny-bag). And to a packed bus that she'd worn the same pants for three days.

OMG - I am absolutely crying with laughter. DP keeps glaring at me because I'm literally lol!

My mother once asked me at a family meal if I'd remembered to water her clematis but it came out as 'clitoris'.

My ex-boyfriend went to a party where an elderly aunt of the hostess commented that her baby had a "lovely red minge."

At Uni a girl rushed in late to a Welsh language lecture. She was very flustered and explained, in Welsh, that she was late because she had sex on her car.

rhew - frost
rhyw - sex

My grandmother went through a stage of saying that things went 'Fut' for things that had broken. Unfortunately this was around time my sister had just got together with her partner and it sounded remarkably like 'fuck'. Sister's DP nearly choked at the fact that my grandmother kept saying fuck!

Also my Grandmother, after watching too much TV, started using the word 'slag' in a similar way to the way you might say stupid. So she would say 'I'm such a slag' instead of 'I'm so stupid'.

Again, much giggles in our family!

In my german gcse oral exam, my teacher asked me what I wanted from a job. I answered with what I thought was german for job satisfaction but actually said masturbation.

Didn't understand why he turned purple from trying not to laugh, until he told me once the tape was switched off!

This thread is brilliant!

"My ex-boyfriend went to a party where an elderly aunt of the hostess commented that her baby had a "lovely red minge."

That one had me roaring with laughter!

When she was a teenager my friend's mum told her French exchange family that she sleeps on a sailor.

Matelot = sailor
Matelas = mattress

I went to China in my year out, and learned a tiny bit of Cantonese, but I wasn't very good at getting the tones right. If we went to visit anyone the highlight would be to feed us a very large meal. I thought I'd learned how to say that I was full, but sadly it came out as "I could eat a horse"!

On a more current note, I was just giving the dog a treat for being obedient, along with praising him. I did feel a bit self conscious about saying "Good come!" to him repeatedly!

Am loving baise/bises!

I?ve probably made some horrific mistakes but sadly no-one?s ever told me what they are....

The pharmacist here once told me that "I would very much like for us to come together sometime". He meant get together (in the social sense).

Wineonafriday - my mother likes to use "slut" in the old-fashioned sense of an untidy person/woman. Think she is truly unaware that there is another meaning. Led to some interesting scenes when I was a kid, with my fellow 8 year olds looking on agog as my mother told them what a terrible slut I was.