Oh, another one I had repressed:
As a teen I helped run a kind of youth club. The other person in charge was quite a bit older and I had a huge crush on him. One day I had to phone him with an important message about a delivery, so I did but ended up with his answering machine. I wasn't really used to using them (it was some time ago) so I just hung up.
A few mins later, however, I thought that maybe I ought to just leave a message and be done with it, so I phoned again. Just as the machine kicked in, my cat walked into the hallway, so I spent a few seconds talking to it, in a schmoozy schmoozy voice, saying something along the lines of 'oh hello gorgeous! You lovely creature you! Oh, come here you lovely thing let me stroke you, mwah mwah mwah'. I stopped in time for the beep - and then realised it wasn't the answering machine at all, but rather my crush had picked up this time. I hung up the phone in panic.
I was all shaky and embarrassed, and could feel the heat rising up my chest, you know? But I felt like I had to explain - so I phoned again and he picked up with a cautious 'hello?'. I blurted out something at a hundred miles an hour, like 'Sorry, it's me, Psammead, it was me just now, too, only I thought you were my cat. Well, I didn't actually, but I thought I was talking to my cat. No, actually that's still not right - I was talking to my cat and didn't realise I had phoned you. Well, I did, but anyway, that delivery we were expected on Thursday is actually coming on Wednesday. Ok? Bye!'