Under 1s twin post-natal group? Should we have one? Who's in?!

[PeelingmyselfofftheCeiling]

The antenatal group is nearly full, any graduates fancy joining forces to compare

Hello beyoglu

Re immunisations, mine were more unsettled than usual after them, no fever, but definitely cranky and wanting to be held more than usual. Luckily the had them on a friday, so dh was around with extra pair of arms for the following two days.

That was it really. Sorry no tips I'm afraid, but if they get a temp you will be advised to give them calpol.

Good luck With it, was a bit anxious and brought a friend to help but in the end they didn't cry much. She was useful though for soothing the first twin after her lit while a held twin2 for his set of injections... Hope that makes sense!!

Hi beyou was going to say congrats on a good sleep but then saw your most recent post. O well theyve done it once so can do it again! Regarding imms please dont worry at all my dts were fine after all of them but every baby is different. I work in a baby clinic and we dont see too many problems the earlier imms are the easiest tbh as they forget about it and its better than having the illnesses. My tips to you would be if you can take someone with you do it! When one twin has had the jab the person holding her take her straight back out into waiting room if poss as it helps them forget about it and not be there when the other dt having jab and two screamy babies are making the nurses ears bleed. At first imms dont give calpol until later (when youve looked for any reaction) but on other jabs give it before!

If it helps weve gone a bit backwards with sleep in our house the dts have started waking for an extra bottle about 2-3 where they were sleeping right through. Not sure if its teething (though they are hungry but we have quite a bit of fussiness and over the bottle in the day), growth spurt, ready for weaning (not yet!), 4 month sleep regression if it exists albeit a bit late. O well thats life I suppose Im still mange to walk and talk at the same time unlike those early weeks. They better start sleeping through again though!

Talking of sleep does anyone know how dreaming is getting on? I really hope shes getting some sleep now her dts are older so hopefully starting to 'get over' the colic- though not sure the mums ever recover! Ha ha they do of course.

Afternoon all,

Just lost a post so to summarize,

Googling night help tonight as I'm still getting nowhere. Seb seems to be settling colic wise, ben still not :( . DD getting up stupidly early (5:30am today) & continuing to play merry hell at bedtime. So she slept 8 hours last night, not enough for a 21 month old, and boys were terrible, all coughing which isn't helping. Sigh. I'm so tired I'm no fun. They're both smiling more now though . Glad you're not worrying bigboobs, waste of energy and mine still aren't super smiley at 11 weeks today- certainly not DT2 anyway.

Mine all been rubbish for jabs beyoglu, definitely take an extra pair of hands. That said, DT1 was distraught in the evening/ night afterwards but DT2 slept the most he ever has! Hope your sleep settles down again.

Oh, and boys weighed today, DT1 up to 12 lb 11 and DT2 11lb 8, so between 25 & 50 th centile for dt1 and 9th centile for DT2- plenty big enough for better sleeping you menaces!!!

Hey all. beyoglu - all mine have been totally fine with injections. I've never noticed any difference with them. Echo what mine says about not giving calpol the first time unless they need it, just so you can keep an eye on them. I went on my own to the docs to get their first lot - took the buggy in with me, got one undressed, passed over to nurse whilst I got other undressed and doc had a look at him, measured etc and then we all swapped and I got them dressed on the buggy. I'm sure that doesn't make any sense.

mine, you made me laugh about the ability to talk and walk at the same time. I seem to be making up words and mixing metaphors like a good un. DH can't keep a straight face half the time.

dream I'm so sorry it's not improving. Maybe a night nanny for a few days a week will really help. And have you had a look at that clock for DD? It's really working with our lo, she says goodnight to the sun and waits in the morning till he wakes up and we've been pushing the time back by 5 mins every day. Might help?

Is it the groclock rednellie? I'll order one tonight, well worth a try! Thanks.

Regarding sleeping, when the Hv weighed the boys today she asked too. As i was a terrible sleeper, still have trouble sleeping anyway and didn't sleep through til I went to school, plus my dad is an insomniac, as was my grandma she just doesn't think my children will be good sleepers :-s . I'll just have to tough it out a bit more and look into night nannies though if £150 a night is the going rate as i saw on a thread on here it may be a couple of days as a one off to get me through...

And rednellie I am in awe. Ebf the babies, no help in the day, can manage a bedtime alone and potty trained DD without even making a big thing of it. Now you are superwoman. I'm sure. Come on now, tell the truth, do you actually wear your knickers over your trousers and can you fly?!

I sometimes wear my knickers on the outside, but only because I got a bit confused getting dressed

Thanks, but I'm no superwoman, I haven't got colicy babies, my DD basically potty trained herself and was begging me to take her nappies off and I've only done one night on me own. Having said all that, my yoga teacher calls all the mums in her class 'Warrior Moms'. I'd take that. I like the idea of a warrior mom off out to fight the good fight!

(and yes, it's the groclock. Worth a stab)

Hi all, hope you are all enjoying your week.

Dream, I was on the night nanny thread, some dumb suggestions on there like 'why not sleep on the sofa with your baby' - er because thats massively dangerous! It is expensive, but if I was you I would get one\two nights a week, spread out, for a few weeks. Then you know you only ever have to do 2-3 nights before you get respite (assuming you can get help at the weekend for free!). I used nightnannies.com but not sure if they only cover London area.
But great weights, all that feeding is doing good then! My two are mainly ff + solids now and still on 2nd and 25th centile!

Beyoglu, after 1st jabs my DTD cried for a long time and went right off her milk. DTS was fine, in fact he slept for a few hours afterwards. I took my mum with me, and put them straight on the boob afterwards. For the 2nd jabs, DTD was asleep in the pram and the nurse jabbed her where she was, she did wake up but only for a minute and went back to sleep so that was great!

Re swaddling, have you seen the swaddlepod things, they just zip up tight so no risk of sheet slipping up the cot? Bit like baby strait jackets...

Oh, I hate the immunisations! I always get very upset when they start crying. Better then the alternative though. With DS I waited until he had symptoms before I gave him something, with the girls I give them some calpol right after. But, now I'll just give them some beforehand! Much better idea, thanks mines

Good that you're getting a nightnurse dreaming even if it's just for one or two nights. I think you can deal with so much more if you're not completely sleep deprived.

And now for my drama of the week: this morning when we went to playgroup, DS was running around with 2 little friends. Right into a wasps nest. Of course I completely panicked stayed calm and ran towards the nest to get DS out. Only, I forgot I was carrying DT1 on my back in a carrier. Much screaming and armwaving later: DS 2 stings, DT1 2 stings, me 7, little friend 12 (!!!) and little friends mum 5 or 6, which started to look nice and big and red. Pfff. After an ER visit all seems to be doing ok, but not a very good day. and I was going to show off the cute (if I say so myself) tops I made for the twins :( Right. I hope your week is going better than mine!

Oh and peeling : I read that thread as well. You're braver than me! Please don't let the nasty paople on AIBU drive you off for too long and come join us again soon.

Where that is my NIGHTMARE!!! I'm serious. My Dad is seriously allergic (he blows up and goes blue) to wasp stings and I'm utterly paranoid one of the kids will be. Ohhhhh goodness. Glad you're all ok, albeit with a more than your fair share of stings.

dream, just thought - we have postnatal doulas out here and they're generally a bit cheaper than night nannies. Is that something they have round your parts? They sound very good, mothering the mother and all that...

Oh no, that sounds terrible! I have never been stung by a wasp or a bee and have a terrible fear of them, it sounds like you all came off pretty badly! At least you know that they don't have an allergy now though...

Hi folks. Wherearemy that sounds bloody terrible! By coincidence I was stung by a wasp on Tuesday but NOTHING compared to your experience.....ow ow ow!!

How are you doing Dream? Any joy on getting help in the night time? I have no idea where to start for looking for that type of help, so hope you get someone good and not too expensive

Night times here have not progressed at all... still feeding every 3 hours, but thats not too bad I guess, although I had hoped for a longer stretch by now! And still no smiles. I know not to worry though I keeping getting horrible feelings of guilt that the boys are ignored for what feels like large chunks of the day. Either I am busy with DD, or I am running around when DD is not here catching up on things I never seem to get round to like brushing hair and teeth washing, sweeping the floor, cleaning the toilets etc etc. They don't get much attention from me at all ..... they are so good in the day that they are left to their own devices a lot. I guess to balance that when she is around DD never leaves them alone!

DD has had a couple of things happen to her which seem to have brought a lot of held back emotion to the surface (I mean emotion about getting used to not being the only DC, having to wait for cuddles sometimes etc).. last night DT2 grabbed a fist full of hair (he has no control over what he does so not intentional!) and would not let go - cue screams of 'Edwards pulling my hair!' and lots and lots of sobbing. That took a while to calm down. And then this morning, the cat projectile vomited (seriously, I have never seen anything like it) all over her new Peppa Pig sunhat. Cue screams of 'my peppa pun hat, no mummy no!!' and more uncontrollable sobbing. Poor poor girl. Lots of cuddles this morning! sun hat now in washing machine.

I don't think DD had much reaction to her first lot of jabs and the boys have not had their yet, so no advice I am afraid.

Ceevee, did you make it to the pub to watch the footie?

No, didn't go to pub as DH phoned at 6pm to tell me he'd invited some mates round to watch the match and could I cook?
We had a takeaway surprisingly.....

oh dear! oh well, take away sounds nice. we have pretty much lived on ready meals since the DTs arrived. and the odd cooked meal by my parents and one by a friend. I evern asked one of my best friend to cook us something and bring it round or for our freezer and she still didn't! cooking is going to recommence after the weekend... gonna get the slow cooker out!

Ha, I know how you feel. When I wanted to do babyled weaning I was told they should just eat what I eat. What, a packet of skips and a chicken cup a soup? Not sure that counts as a balanced diet...!
So i have been trying to cook more since they were 6 months so we can all eat the same, but mainly failing and giving them yoghurt and fruit and rice cakes.

I feel like a new person today :) . When dh realized what night help would cost he agreed to a new nighttime plan. Normally to help he'd given an ebm bottle and kept the babies downstairs until 2am ish, but I'd often get almost no sleep after that as they're much more unsettled after midnight. Last night I made him get up and help juggle babies and settle them at every feed. Flukey in a way as though they fed 2 hourly, and at the same time (!!!) and we were able to settle them inbetween, so they went down after their 2:30 & 4:30 feeds, and DT2 went down again at 6:30 so when I got up with DD at 6:30 there was only one baby awake and it all felt so managable. Dh says he'll continue with this on Friday and Saturday nights so I'm super chirpy. A bit of sleep has made the world of difference :)

Omg wheresmy, that sounds horrific. I can't imagine it, must have been so scary. And is it wasps or bees you're not meant to run from? Were the My Girl type scenarios running through your head?! So glad everyone was ok.

ceevee I also never have time to cook, I'd love to see the hv face if you happily told her you'd weaned them with skips and cuppa soup :) . Toast is also a quick weaning meal ;-)

Hey thanks for the imms reassurance everyone :)

Now tell me, why did I do it... I went and looked at the Gina Ford twin book. She makes me feel anxious even as I'm reading it. I wanted some pointers about feeding the guys so that they get hungry at 10, which would suit us for the evening feed. And I get sucked in... and start feeling like a bad mother because not only am I unable to structure their naps, I don't even know how long they nap for or keep track of who's awake and who's asleep. The guys' feeding remains really variable in terms of weight and I worry that I'm not doing it properly or something, that they could take more if I timed them better or spent more time winding them or kept them awake or made sure they had a nap or something. And how am I going to stimulate them enough as they get bigger when I can't be bothered, I'm so tired and it is so fecking boring spending all day with small babies... didn't get much sleep last night can you tell??

put the book down and walk away

seriously, I am sure GF has some nuggets of information that would be useful, and thet her routines work for some - but they are certainly not everyones cup of tea (not mine) and that does not mean you are doing things wrong. I remember feeling like this with DD - but after a few weeks I realised that I was stressing about routines rather than enjoying my baby. Your DTs will show you their routine when they have worked out what it is - IMO you can't really 'give' them a routine at this stage, other than ancouraging them to stay awake a little longer, drink a little more.... IFSWIM??? Not sure that makes sense??!! Can you tell I didn;t get much sleep either?!

I think mine are about the same age as yours? 7 weeks. mine drift in and out of sleep all day and drink different amount (between 120ml and 160ml), although the time between feeds is all most always 3 hours. this is a fluke and nothing to do with me.

Please don't worry :)

PS don't really know what I am talking about and feel like I am fumbeling in the dark myself most of the time... so sorry if what I said was not very reassuring / make much sense. What I DO know is that there is no right or wrong way and you need to trust your instincts and if things are going ok then great - no need to worry abouot how long they have slept for etc.

oh bloody hell and I can't stop worrying about the smile thing... they will be 8 weeks on monday and still no pearly whites on show. Come on boys SMILE!!! (sorry!)

beyoglu, I remember being tearful after reading the Baby Whisperer by how I was totally unable to get DD to nap in the house, sleep at night or have any kind of routine. That was with one baby. Step away from the book!!!!! I think they dent your confidence as a parent and make you feel you are Doing It Wrong. I can't get mine into anything resembling a routine and they're 11 weeks

And yy bigboobs I feel very guilty that if the babies are awake and quiet they're ignored and not stimulated/ played with as I'm also doing jobs or playing with DD. Oh the guilt of being a mum!

bigboobs mine were not smiling at 8 weeks. They do now. Delay worrying for another 2 weeks at least .

I know, thank Dream. I am being silly. I know, just can't help it! Sooooooo pleased you had a better nights sleep - I hope the same happens the next couple of nights.

and you said to Beyoglu what I wanted to say, but worded it better!

Re cooking - I have eaten today a bar of Milka (dime bar version), a whole pack of Waitrose chocolate and hazlenut cookies, and 3 black jacks and 2 anti-biotics, do they count as food? but I do now have a shepherds pie in the oven (supermarket made - just heating it up!). how I crave a roast dinner!

He he bigboobs I had two M&S extremely chocolatey mini rolls, some lindt chocolate and multiple biscuits at dds music group after my cereal... Plus lunch. Eek.

I can't help worrying too. DT2 is still much less smiley than DT1, and neither is super smiley yet. plus as we've just said, I don't put a fraction of the time I did into DD with them as its all so busy. And DD still not talking at all (21 months) though she does sign and communicate like that and by pointing.

Still, at music group a child I'd not seen since we both took our dds to baby massage was there. 19 months old, clearly not even sitting independently, spastic I think, certainly didn't look normal tone and definitely not normal movement patterns. her mum said she sees physio, occupational therapy etc. I'd guess cerebral palsy, she was a 4lb 4 prem baby. So temporarily at least I'm not worrying as its so unlikely to be a 'real' problem and that gave me back some perspective. Beautiful smiley little girl.

That's one of the great things about twins though, you don't need to spend all day stimulating them, when mine got to about 12-14 weeks they suddenly noticed each other and now they spend most of their awake time on the playmat, staring into each others eyes, kicking each other, and stroking each others hair, they hardly seem to notice whether I'm there or not.