House Hold Income 85K a month net

[cripplinglyalone]

My house hold income is 85k a month net. I am money rich but support /family poor. AMA.

@TwoLeftSocksWithHoles

what on earth do you mean - take in ironing?! How ridiculous

Are you happy to pay more tax for the rest of us?

Thanks for being kind. I am absolutely genuine. I give a lot to charity. I didnt lose family due to money, I was determined to be a success following abusive childhood. The scars of tha thave taken a toll on my physical health.
I do pay for a nanny and help. I crave the warmth of of organic family.

Last year I paid over one million pounds GBP in tax, just under half my entire earnings. I am on a normal payroll. No tax loopholes or fancy advice over here. I also pay tax on my savings at higher rate. Not sure how much more you can tax higher earners than what I have paid.

I do, but it is still transactional. Since I lost my grandparents I have no kind, natural fmaily.

What job do you do to earn that amount?

Ah OP, it’s not a race to the bottom at all but I have zero family support (parents died nearly 10 years ago, and DH’s mum isn’t interested) so I do get it. However, at least you’re not poor like me! I’ll be ya friend for a few bob!!

It's such a valuable question. I know some of my lonliness is self inflicted, stemming from childhood. I gues si am here to say as absolutely grateful as I am, money is not the riches it's cracked up to be.

What do you do with it all?

Money can make life easier in many ways, but it can't begin to make up for the lack of close, loving, supportive connections. I hope you get some of that from your children, OP.

Making genuine friendships and being able to help friends out I am grateful for. I grew up poor. I am sorry about your parents and DH's Mum. It stings when they are alive but don't care.

My income grew quickly. I am in tech and a lot of my total comp is in company stocks. The stocks don't stay high forever so I won't have this eye watering income for ages. Becasue it has a shelf life, I have saved 1.5mil and plan around the future if I lost my job. It is only a job, not my own business, so I can have my plug pulled any day like the rest of us.

I genuinely think I do. I am not bitter, but I am aware I pay a huge huge amount into the system and that's before all my charitable stuff.

Lifestyle creep is real. A lot goes on health stuff as I go private for a bunch of womens health stuff. I get a lot of help around the house. I wont lie, my groceries bill is silly because we've all just got used to having what we want. Days out, eating out, it all adds up. I give a lot to charity and I save about 50k a month.

No but being incredibly well off & lonely is a shit load better than having no money & being lonely.

im sorry about your childhood xx

i understood how lonely life can be.

as it's AMA - can you say what you do please.(edited to say I cross posted)

do you have a partner? Kids?? (Edited again to say obviously you do as you have a nanny🙇🏻‍♀️)

im single, and after my stroke really really understand being alone & missing having someone that always has your back.

When did someone last pay for dinner? George Michael talked about when he hit the big money everyone always assumed he would be paying. Which he didn't mind, he just wanted to be treated once in a while. Do you ever feel like that?

What's the question?

If you're not happy about something, money will go a long way to helping that. You cant buy family but you can buy a hell of a lot of physical and mental support with that income. I hope you're able to get the support you need.

My entire life is dedicated to giving my children the love I didn't get and teaching them whats mine is theirs. Becasue I isolate myself a lot, I have tremendous guilt that my lack of bonding with other mums affects their popularity. I am not standoffish- I avoid contact altogether. I had my kids really old and feel like while I am extremely financially secure now, I was vibrant and outgoing- albeit poor in my 20's!

Is 85k a month a typo?

I havent thought about this. A good friend sent me a book the other day and I felt very loved. Another friend sent me a note as she knew i am reclusive right now. God I know thos sounds so like pity me, but I guess I am here to say while others might look at me and thing 85k NET A MONTH!!!!!! (not that you would EVER guess by looking at me) I look at MUms at the school gates with their own mums with them, laughing, or people making big bustling plans for Christmas and I feel real visceral pangs of envy. Money really isn't everything.

Oh and George Michael? Fantastic, loving human being. RIP good man,

That must be hard (for you, not DC, who will find their own way with friendships).
Perhaps it's not just close family you are missing but connection with other adults? One thing that money can buy is therapy. Maybe it's worth investing some time and money in exploring how your relationships in general are and what you might like to change in the way you relate.

Two beautiful primary school kids, adventourous, kind little souls. An emotionally checked out husband, thats a whole other chapter but maybe why I feel perpetually alone too.

It’s not self-inflicted if it stems from childhood. You have your guard up for completely valid reasons I’m sure.

And I think that I might feel unsure of new friendships if I was that wealthy. Not necessarily because I would think that they’d be after money but because they might be in awe of my success and not see the real me?

But you have friends sending you notes and books even though you're locked away right now.
You do have support.