Debt Number 3 : For those who feel they are drowning and want a way out

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from Nerf's incredibly useful
FIRST www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1969188-Can-we-have-a-support-thread-for-people-who-are-massively-in-debt
and then
SECOND
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2011878-Debt-support-thread-2?
threads about realising you are in and supporting each other out of debt.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important thing to remember is

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it.

Sorry for all the typos! Hope you can make it out x

No personal experience with Centre Parcs but could you keep cost down by sourcing vouchers/voucher codes for activities (I think Ive seen CP on the Tesco clubcard site for example)...and day to day make sure you pack up own drinks/snacks/etc to take out and about with you.

Depending on when you are going maybe set aside 5-10pnds from your weekly food budget from now til you leave?

Due to bad credit rating we can't get a 0% credit card.

Yes activities at Centerparcs cost extra and are expensive. At some point you or your father should get a list of them including costs so you can book. But use of the pool is free. Food is expensive too, both in the restaurants and in the shop, so take as much as you can with you.

Look at where the Center Parcs is, some (like Longleat) is not that far from a supermarket, so you can get some food just before you arrive.

Spa sessions (for you) are often cheapest 6pm-9pm. You will get to book activities online a few weeks before you go. Do not book very many, if any at all. children can love just being able to play in the woods/streams and go swimming. Some things like going in a boat/canoe on the lake can be quite low cost and are paid for at the time, no advance booking. You can always book activities when there, if you really need to.

There is often an indoor play somewhere and there will be playgrounds around the woodland. The thing to consider is to take your own bikes, or rent there, or not use bikes at all. Depends on if your children ride bikes. It can be a long walk at some locations from villa to swimming pool, so check on a map which villa has been booked.

In that case kazza you're definitely right to make the OD your priority. It fecks me right off that Barclays say they've done this to make things 'clearer'. At least if they said 'we realised that if we did this we could force hundreds of thousands of people to give us more money'. It's not always as simple as 'well just pay it off then', is it?

Yes - I will have to start putting money aside. And I am grateful because we wouldn't have booked a holiday ourselves and the children will love it. If I can suggest eating in as much as poss, and do an Aldi shop on the way, it shouldn't be too bad [famous last words] x

*I mean at least it would have been more honest if Barclays had said that.

I wonder if all the other banks will follow suit now that Barclays have done this. My £500 HSBC overdraft costs me £2.70 a month. I hardly even count it as a debt

For first night meal at Center Parcs, make something at home and freeze it. Then take with you and it defrosts on the journey!

Their gas ovens are not great, so try to make things that you do not need to go in oven on a high heat. Take your favourite cooking utensils with you, I find their ones terrible and sometimes can a bit lacking in the number of things, like wooden spoons, fish slice.

Meals on the hob work great.

If you've a slow cooker take that with you...put it on in the morn and come home to a delicious no stress home cooked meal...it's your holiday too!!

I agree with Cindy34 about the ovens - they really aren't great. Use the hob or BBQ if the weather is good. I think most accommodation has a BBQ outside, you just need coals?

Thanks for all the centre parcs tips! I don't have a slow cooker (and I call myself a mumsnetter!) but If the hob works well it sounds like I could easily bring the wherewithal to make spaghetti bolonaise or similar. Ooh I'm quite excited now I've got over my new found miserly instincts!

Pixie - I would be surprised if other banks didn't take advantage but very impressed if they don't. I will be switching banks once we move house so will be watching with interest (no pun intended).

We're just not doing a holiday this summer, there's no way we can afford it.
Hoping to sit down with DH tomorrow and do a July budget plus pay a chunk off CC2, my goal is to get it to £875 or less - that's what I'll make at the summer school I'm teaching at so if we can get it down to there or below I can clear it in early August with the summer school pay which will be awesome! However it's at 1300 ish right now and that means finding a big chunk of cash right in the same moment as the car is getting MOT.

No summer holiday for us either. Our last holiday was in 2007. No point in moping about it but I do hope that by the time our girls are at school and old enough to notice we will be able to take them away somewhere.

No summer holiday either here. I was going to try and book for next year, but we can't do it.

One day... hopefully before my DCs leave home!

Not here either - couldn't justify it with all the debt and think stress levels would go through the roof!
Keep your fingers crossed though - dh has applied for a new job

Summer holidays : I've not booked mine yet - even though I can afford it. I've always been in the habit of waiting till right at the end of term and seeing what I can afford.
For many years it was diddly squat.
BUT keep an eye on LastMinute as there are some self catering / b&B bargains that come up a week before departure.

Pixie that is a healthy approach. Get out of debt now and then when your kids are old enough to notice you won' be any more.

I know for all of you it feels like a grind, but taking control of those debts, stopping them rising and getting into healthy spending habits, you will suddenly start to see differences.

TBH some of the best holiday times are long lazy picnics in the woods or the wilderness bits of the local park.

Definitely no summer holiday here this year or for a few years, although at some point I would like a short trip to visit family and friends in Germany.

No hols here either...would love to dig out the camping gear and take DS away for a few nights...but can't face it on my own

Re holidays I am about to fall off the wagon big time I think. Was going to potter all summer, paint some more walls, have picnics etc but had a cry for help from family member who lives in the states. There is no one else who can help. But at this short notice and with dcs... Any tips on getting amazing value flights to the east coast?

puffer
fly on a Tuesday, be willing to try the odd times, make darned sure you have free accommodation stateside, consider odd airports eg Newark rather than JFK, consider flying from other than London
it can be done

BUT I would really, really caution to think hard about this.

You cannot afford this.
Why have they asked you rather than anybody less than 3000 miles away?
Have they offered to pay for your flights?
Are they guaranteeing you free bed and board out there?
While you are dealing with the 'emergency' what will your kids do?

A week in the US is expensive. The exchange rate and economic changes mean there are few bargains to be had.

I'll be going though as my dad is not getting any younger and my sister no less terminally ill

I knew about book on a Tuesday but not fly on a Tuesday, thanks. Much sense in what you say. She (sis) has no one else. I have a horrible feeling that she's in a bad EA relationship. If I ask her to come here he may not let her. If I don't go she may shut down completely. But yes, I'll get accommodation guarantees, also from friends.

PS sorry to hear about your sister

Puffer
So what do you plan to achieve by going?
I'm being slightly devil's advocate, but if you spend loads of money and come home frustrated and hacked off, will it be worth it?
Will you actually make a difference that could not be made with hours on skype or even a landline call that would add up to a LOT less money and stress?

You need to do a SWOT analysis of it (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats) and travel with your head not just your heart.

I've done so, I therefore make areal effort to see my Dad and let it go if my sister retreats under her rock.
Saves a fortune in flights
and wine to deconstruct the stress

Didn't you use to be able to get courier flights?

not in holidays and almost hardly at all since 9/11
standby a year ago was bad enough