Emmsys angels xxx support for mummies of lost angels part 4 xxxxx

[littlebellsmum]

Less sadness, more joy but always lots of lovely people who understand

hugs, scorpio (I'm not ignoring the rest of ya, honest) you are entitled to be sad/annoyed/any number of things when you see something like that.

welcome to all the new 'faces' hiding in here, it's a lovely warm place and the only one where I've felt truly understood in the last few weeks for which I will be for ever grateful. Hope that soon I'm in a position to 'give something back' and can be as strong as all you lovely ladies who have been there for me.

Hi all
Gracie - you did make me laugh with your mothers day flowers!
Kate - hope work has gone well.

Welcome Neeko - sorry you have had to go through this too. Work was good for me - took my mind off things, although I was a a meeting today with the nice lady from Clearblue who had samples on her stand - took all my self control not to nick them all!!
Scorpio - you are so not wierd. I don't think the girl you saw has ever had a mc or threatened mc as if she had, there is no way she would be so blase about her baby. Having had two easily with no problems, I was pretty blase when I was pregnant last time. How wrong could I be and should I be lucky enough to be pregnant again, I will be sooooo careful!
Yes, Blue moon, I did the hang on baby chats as I was losing it. Telling it that it would love it's siblings if it could just hold on...

Reading lasts posts.... crying again.... I'd put my hand on my stomach & say out loud in a stern voice "I am NOT NOT NOT losing this baby", & my toddler then would say "NOT NOT NOT" mimicking me.

I think we need to stop with the baby chats - making me far too

Yeah typical flippin children - none of them listened to us & they all did the opposite of what we wanted them to do.

big hugs all round are in order i think, group hug and shares in a giant chocolate bar anyone?

just remember at least we can say how we feel here without fearing we may look stupid or just not be understood. i can identify with nearly everyone on here in some way, so now i know i am not losing the plot after all. does anyone else have trouble sleeping, or when you do sleep, have disturbing dreams? thank goodness for under eye concealer is all i say!

Sleeps OK, now, BlueMoon - but then as I'm 6 weeks post mc, I'd be a zombie if it wasn't . Make up is definetly the way forward - that and chocolate. Have you opened that large bar yet? Pass some this way

Chocolate is open, help yourself!

My mc was in 1st week of Feb, i kinda thought by now i should be sleeping a bit better but i'm not really. And i am a bit zombie like at times, i seem to be only able to sleep properly between about 4 and 6am, then its time to get up for work, and needless to say i really struggle getting out of bed. Sometimes i have so many dreams i wake up even more exhausted. Just hope i can get back to normal, i used to be able to sleep for England! But yes make up is my best friend at the moment. Oh along with you lovely ladies to keep me going

Insomnia strikes again. It's my own fault though as I was poorly oveer the weekend and ended up having 12 hours sleep last night and am suffering for it now.

Is anyone else sufering with a crass husband or partner? because never mind even thinking about ttc I'd like to wring his b**y neck at the moment for the selection of insensitive comments I've received. I know men are wired differently but surely there is a limit to verbal incompetance of certain specemins!

I do apologise for my rant but even the people I know say what a lovely man he is which makes it difficult to moan about him because it makes me feel like a complete bitch.

A warm welcome for any newcomers to this warm and friendly cave and sorry for your losses. (Sorry, I should have put this bit first, always start with something nice and so on but I could't help myself)

Scorpio, you are not weird in the least and you are not alone in your feelings

Morning everyone.
It was nice to come on and read so many posts this morning. My friend came round last night. She had a mc 11 years ago (and conceived a healthy baby 3 months later - hope!)so she knew how I was feeling and it was good to get it off my chest. I think i deal with it best by talking about it but there are only certain people who are comfortable with istening!
Happyjules My husband is trying really hard but is falling short a little bit (bless him) He finds it easier to immerse himself into work and even suggested that would help me as I have too much time to think! He means well but never talks about it unless I bring it up and then just says placating things. The hugs are good though! I think it's just the male/female divide thing and that they aren't slaves to their hormones like us.
Bluemoon I struggled to sleep for the first few days but then felt that sleep was a relief because I wasn't thinking about baby and now can't get enough of it. I've being taking my dd on some long walks though so that's probably helping. Have been having some strange dreams though...

Does anyone else feel like they should be doing the whole eating healthily and preparing their body thing but in reality want to stuff their face with lots of unhealthy stuff? (Galaxy is my current chocolate of choice)
Anyway I didn't mean to ramble on for so long. The sun is shining here - though it looks freezing - so I think I'll try and get some fresh air. I'm back to work tomorrow so won't have this luxury then.
Take care everyone.

Neeko funny what you say about the eating thing. I think we all got used to eating properly & being healthy in the (all to few) weeks we were pregnant. Now we are not pregnant anymore we are letting ourselves gorge on the things we denied ourselves before.... for me its vodka!

Just to add fuel to my neurosis my boobs are a bit sore & I'm weeing more often. I know its bound to be my body playing tricks on me & I'm setting myself up for a fall. My af will arrive next week & I'll be crashingly disappointed.

I wish our hormones had an off button sometimes.

littlebellsmum - i know she has had at least one mc. I am not thinking about it anymore today as thats life, isnt it.

Love to all you ladies who help me in the dark times xx

MLS know it's hard but think it's best to try not to think about it til you have a chance of a BFP. There's nothing much more you can do to influence the outcome at this stage and surely being relaxed will only help. I know,easier said than done.

Neeko 10 new preg tests arrived from Ebay this morning..... trying to resist the urge even though I did one only yesterday - I'm doing my own freaking head in!

MLS I know, it's hard. I'm hoping to be joining you in this phase in a few weeks. At least you have hope at the mo. Did a pg test myself this morning to see whether my levels had dropped after mc last wk. Came up positive which was hard as I know it's not. Wish I could give you the BFP since I can't have it... How long does it take for the hormones to go after mc?

Oh I hated those positive tests after mc. It totally adds insult to injury, but you have to do them to make sure you get a bfn before you start ttc properly again.

I think it took about 3 weeks post mc for me to get a neg result. Also bear in mind that if you use opk's you will probably get a false positive until your levels have dropped. I was doing opk's & they were constantly positive for the first three weeks after mc & I was very confused until I learned that they detect the same hormones as a hpt so it makes sense as to why.

Thanks - think you have just saved me a fortune on opks! It's awful how expensive they all are too. think i might build up a few Boots points over the next wee while!
Well done - I'm assuming you've had the new tests for a couple of hours and haven't done one yet.

hi girls ive made it though the whole of a 12 and a half night shift at a+e with out breaking down or getting emotional wen people were asking me why i had been off so long .

we did have a pregnent woman in labour but i just stayed out the way all staff were brill

just got one more night 2 do then a bit of a break

hope everyone is ok
xxxxx.

Neeko it took me over 4 weeks to get a BFN after mc... but you might be quicker as I had retained tissue.

Well done Kate, you and Gracie are quite brave, going back to work in A&E after a mc. Hope keeping busy helped to take your mind off it for a while.

Neeko no no no don't go to Boots go to Ebay!! I buy 10 hpt's for £3.35 + £2.50 p&p. They are genuine & do work as they are what I've used for both pregnancies. However as they are so cheap the temptation is to do one every day until af arrives! I managed to not do one today & will try & hold off until Friday.

Well done Kate for getting through your shift & keeping it together.

Well done Kate. Hope I can be as brave tomorrow. Have spent the afternoon marking essays so I can hide feeling emotional tomorrow by ranting at my higher class about how bad their essays are
Ok you've depressed me a little by how long it could take to have a BFN but at least I can mentally prepare myself. I'm hoping I won't be so long as I only bled for 1 1/2 days after op and had already lost some pg symptoms before scan.
I'm off to Ebay to buy myself some sticks to pee on! Hopefully it won't be long til we're all peeing into impossibly small bottles to have our protein levels checked!!!!

thank u everyone i suprised myself i really did lol

im scared about doing a preg test as i think il be upset if its positve still had mc 3rd march ERPC 2 weeks ago.

Wasn't as bad as I thought it would be as had convinced myself it would be positive. In a weird way it was nice to prove I hadn't imagined the whole thing...

Well done Kate for surviving your night shift - I'm proud of you!!!

It took 2 and a half weeks after my ERPC before I got a BFN, really horrible when you keep seeing BFP.

Neeko try babymad.com for cheap pregnancy and OPKs. Its a good thing they were cheap as I kept using ovulation tests when my pregnancy test was still positive.