missed miscarriage, just sat here waiting.....

[dramaqueen72]

anyone out there relate to this? this is my second missed m/c, tho i had a baby inbetween. the shock of a diasterous scan still hurts like mad i found out yesterday. i now have to wait a week for a rescan, and then choose how i want ot proceed. either a eprc (d&c), or pills to force m/c, or 'sit and wait' with poss return to surgery. absolutely crap awful choices. i feel so numb and like my life is on hold. still havent told hardly anyone but struggling to day to appear 'normal' and jolly.
bloatella if youre out there......i couldnt find your thread so am wittering away on this one.

Wishingchair - I think men tend to want to talk about, get it out of their system and then move forward. I think they just don't feel the need to talk things through as much as us women. I went through a horrible patch with DH when i felt he just wouldn't talk about m/c and then realised its just the way men deal with grief. This thread was a life saver as it means i can talk about it as much as i need to, i hope you find that to.

I agree re DH/Ps and their way of dealing with grief. My DH has buried himself in the course he's doing, is very moody and snappy, and in the few moments we do get alone together he always finds something engrossing to read in the newspaper. It's as if the m/c never happened and he is back to being the student struggling to do well on his course. Then very occasionally and when I am least expecting it (and always when I am feeling OK) he comes and asks how I am feeling!

Ive half heartedly started the healthly stuff though have to say feel a bit cynical about it given my other 3 had several bastings in alcohol b4 I knew I was pg
however at least its something positive to do
anyone else suddenly noticing lots of pg bumps now its warmer lucky cows
im trying booking a holiday distraction therapy at present but then thinking cant go there in case im pg...

Holiday sounds like a vg idea. We are using DH's new credit card to book a little easter break & he is only allowed to study in the daytime. Why would being pg stop you going away hereshoping? Are you booking for much later in the year?

Yes I have finally changed my name back. Back on the hard stuff.

Lets hope it's not for long Arabica.
Hope everyone is OK today.
xx

Full strength Americano with a little soya milk in the more enlightened cafes. Mmmm. A very small compensation for not being pregnant and not ttc.

Morning to all.
Am balancing precariously between threads again as I'm still doing the TTC thing but difficult when I can't stop crying.
Been back to the doc & he has signed me off til April so that takes the daily worry of trying to get through the day at work away. As he said, to lose my Dad was bad enough, then the m/c & erpc & all at a horrible time of year.
I'm normally so happy & optimistic about things but just can't seem to dig myself out at the moment. Finding it all really tough.

thats good newes being signed off George
know what you mean about thread hopping, one day im ttc, next feeling mis about mcs
Arab - thinking of going somewhere exciting - fancy something mad like backpacking in peru for 3weeks hence worries about pg, also prev 2 mcs seem to have happened in france so am feeling a bit jinked about being away

hereshoping, see what you mean, although for me I just love travelling so much I know it would help me. But we are so skint, 4 days in New Forest is a major financial risk!
George, glad to hear you have been signed off, don't know your circumstances, but will you be OK not going to work? For me time alone isn't good as I just sit around thinking too much and getting upset. I work from home but can't concentrate on that so whenever I have had time alone in the past week I have gone to the gym.

Just popping in to see how everyone is doing. You all sound like you are a getting there. George, hope you are being nice to yourself during your time off. I think hereshopping's idea of lots of trips to the gym sounds like a good idea if yu can summon the energy

hi all. Sorry ive not been on but its beena tough few days. I think i ovulated yestersay as ive had cramping and stuff. Bded lots so could well get pregnant this month. Obviously if it happens i will be terrified but im seeing it as a means to an end. If i mc atleast we can get tests done to find out why and if i dont mc than we will have a baby!

Good luck Bonkerz and have a good time on Sat night (you said you were going for a big night out). 2 nights ago I had only my first night out since the ERPC/asthma; it was brilliant to be outside in the dark feeling all warm from wine, spicy food and intelligent female conversation (as opposed to poor overworked and overstressed DP who can only bang on about his course)

Hi everyone.
Bonkerz, glad to hear from you but so sorry that you are feeling down. It is so hard isn't it, and even harder for you going through it a second time. I just hope that this is a temporary phase for us all. It is hard to stay on the TTC thread, seem to send myself mad by thinking about it all the time and what might happen. Gradually the fear of a m/c happening again just overtakes any feeling of wanting to be p/g and I end up here again. Still doing the temps & tests though. Utter madness!!!

Going to keep busy next week by following your idea Arabica & going to the gym and then i'm going to sort out my tip of a garden. Think the fresh air will do me good and it really does need a sort out. I've been sorting my Dads house out all day & I'm finally ready to put it on the market. Its a relief in some ways but sure I'll have a sob about it later.

So glad you enjoyed your night out Arabica. It probably released a lot of pressure spending enjoyable time out with friends.

Teatime /Girl, you have both gone very quiet so hope you are OK.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} to everyone.

Hi George, the gym really does help me, so I hope it helps you too. I just wish I could get there more often as, whenever I am alone, I'm doing a lot of comfort-eating & feel like I have put on lots of weight.

Gardening sounds therapeutic too, although have not tried that one as (a) we live in an upstairs flat and (b) DH and I are a husband and wife house-plant serial killer team .

I'm a bit confused as I only had my ERPC on 17 Feb, the bleeding seemed to have stopped by Thursday, and now I think I am having a period. But my cycle is normally more like 26-29 days. I am not ready to decide to ttc but just wondering if anyone else experienced this...

Hi Arabica, doing the comfort eating myself at the moment (flapjack city in this house!!). Why aren't I one I one of those people who stop eating at times of stress???
Feeling much brighter today so I'm hoping that putting my Dads house on the market might have been a bit of a stepping stone yesterday. The sun is shining also which is always a help.

Love the house plant serial killer team . I tend to kill them indoors by not watering them, but I'm thinking in a garden the rain can do that for me (watch us have an 8 week drought as soon as I step foot in the garden!)

My first period after ERPC happened 2 weeks past the op (I stopped bleeding 1 day after op). Wasn't sure whether it was a period but my doc confirmed it was. Think your body just goes a bit weird with the first cycle & then calms down for the second.

I think I might tip toe back to the TTC thread later today or tomorrow. I think I'll start a sweep stake on how long before I'm back recovering on this thread though - any takers for 3 days?????

Glad to hear I am not the only one with an out-of-whack cycle and a ferocious feeding habit. Am trying not to be cross with myself about the eating, as I seem to be powerless to stop it happening. Have already had an Alpen bar and 2 other cereal bars (full of sugar) because they were there in the kitchen and I ate everything else edible last night. It doesn't help that I'm stuck indoors writing something for a deadline tomorrow morning, so chances of getting to gym (and therefore renewing motivation to stay fit and healthy) are slim.
George, good luck with the ttc thread. I had a cautious look myself but there was lots of stuff about baking and I only cook when I'm feeling confident and happy.

george32, pleased to hear you're feelng brighter today.
Arabica, here's hoping you'll be feeling confident and happy soon and giving Mr Kipling a run for his money

george - know what you mean - I go on ttc thread then get scared off by people seriously trying. my cycles still up the creek - erpc 25 jan and dont feel could cope with the overwhelming anxiety of waiting for another mc after 2 in 6 months
just changed out of my too tight jeans into pyjamas as feeding habit here too!
arabica - didnt realise you were so soon after erpc - im a few weeks on from you and nowhere nr ready ttc
hi bonkerz - hope you are well
girl,teatime - hope you are doing OK - would be good to here from you

Thanks for your support Bubble, especially at this time. I do hope you are doing OK. xx

Spotting tonight - is it implantation, is it period, is it just imagination, or just another phase in sending me barmy!!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}} to all the gently rounded people who live on flapjack & anything edible in the kitchen (just eaten an easter egg - how bad am I!!!?). xx

hey ladies. missing you all over on the other thread. i dont think you really have to chose between the two......no-one after our m/c's is surely feeling 100% fabulous about ttc. i guess i know i really really want to be successfully pg, and thats what making me ttc. even if some days i definately feel lower than others. i'm sorry my baking scared you away arabica its just a hobby of mine. george woohoo on the flapjack making sounds good and thanks for your support earlier on different subject.
hereshoping, hope youre okay? miss chatting with you, and Girl, wheres she gone?

Ooohh told DP about the support on here & why I keep removing myself to the computer, so changed name immediately. Nothing to hide (I don't think, but you never know!!) I like flapajck by the way!!!

hello long time no post, hope everyone is ok. I haven't read back to see how you all are but will catch up soon.
I've got to have another ultrasound this week to see if I need an erpc all taking too long!
Any way, maybe I'll know more this week and be able to move on a bit, hope so.
hugs to george, hereshoping, teatime, bonkerz and DQDQDQDQDQ and Bella are you all ok too?

hi all,
girl, sorry its all taking so long- im glad i opted for the op cos it did help in a small way. Hope all is sorted when u go for ultrasound.
George- fingers crossed for you whatever you want the outcome to be.
DQ and HS hugs for you((())))

Ok so im on day 16 of my cycle and SHOULD have ov on day 11 (guessing but all signs were there! DH and i have had great fun BDing and we havent mentioned ttc so if its happened then so be it. Have started peeing every 20 mins today which is odd but my last pregnancy i do remember getting symptoms VERY early on so am gonna search my posts and compare notes i think.

hi girl - glad to hear from you - take care - erpc does help in strange way