Missed miscarriage

[Armdjm]

Hello, I am just looking for any advice (preferably from NHS experience) as I know no one who has gone through this to ask.

I am 9 1/2 weeks pregnant, had a private scan yesterday which confirmed heart stopped at 6+4. I had a gut feeling (hence the scan) I can’t explain why as I still have all my symptoms.

I rang my local unit and went today for a scan who again confirmed the same as the private scan but are making us go back in 14 days for a re scan before I can have any medical management.

it just feels cruel and I have so many worries.
Will it happen naturally when it stopped so long ago?
can I end up with an infection with it just left there?
Will the NHS offer surgical management over tablets?

I just feel tortured

thank you to anyone who has read this!

@Armdjm @Confusedmermaid1 @Bellebg @CJHR18
Hi ladies,
thank you so much for sharing your stories.
It brings a lot of comfort to know what to expect next.
So sorry you had to go through all of this 🙏

I’ve somehow reached my 12 weeks scan last week only to find out no heartbeat and baby stoped growing 6 weeks ago! My body is still holding on to us and I don’t have any symptoms whatsoever 😢
Now I’m having the longest week in my life waiting for the second scan booked in for this Thursday.

@WildFinch we are same age. Stay strong 🪷

I would take more time off work. I had a miscarriage before and a surgical procedure. I wasn’t ready to go back to work for at least a week at the time. But I work in a hospital and see sick people every day, so I just didn’t feel I had capacity to help/care for anyone anymore.
Everyone is different though and sometimes work is a good distraction!

@Ingutwetrust so sorry you're going through this 😔

Hope you are doing OK as can before your scan tomorrow. Please let me know how you get on and know that I'm always here if you need to discuss what happens next xx

@Ingutwetrust thank you and so sorry you're going through this as well. A second scan, is that to confirm? Let us know how it goes and sending you lots of gentle hugs.
I have a desk job I can do from home and my team are very understanding. So I'm hopeful I'll be ok. Your job sounds very different, I'm glad you were able to take the time you needed xx

I have a question, wasn't sure if I should start a new thread but hope it's ok to ask here. I'm waiting for my MVA next Tuesday and have started cramping and having very slight discoloration when I wipe after a wee. Has anyone started miscarrying naturally before surgical intervention? Would they still do it if I've had bleeding? I don't want this to go on any longer than it has too and I'm worried they will let me go through it naturally if it starts which from what I've read can take weeks.

@CJHR18 @WildFinch
thank you both🙏
The second scan was just a formality to confirm there are no changes. Though it does prolong the agony, but no heartbeat and no development.
I've opted for mva which is going to be tomorrow. As much as I believe medical or natural miscarriage are better for you, I feel like I need this safe and controlled hospital environment. And I’m so glad it is all going to be over.

@WildFinch i was told if I start bleeding tonight I still need to come in for the procedure. They will assess me and if anything left, they still do it. Hope this helps with your question - not long till your mva and all of this is over!

@WildFinch Same as @Ingutwetrust i was told when they were sending me home for a 14 day wait between scans if I started bleeding as long as I was still testing positive on a pregnancy test to still go for the appointment.

I had a lot of cramping and a heavy feeling leading up to my surgery so was sure it was going to start on its own but nothing!

@WildFinch I’m so sorry that you’re going through this awful experience. Sending hugs.

As everyone else has said, you should be fine. I started bleeding a few days before my MVA and the procedure went ahead - they said that actually it was helpful for the procedure to be at that point.

I hope all goes as well as it can do and your recovery goes ok x

@Ingutwetrust Hope everything goes well tomorrow! I'll be thinking of you xxx

@Ingutwetrust hope you're doing OK and everything went as planned. Been thinking of you xxx

@CJHR18
thank you so much for checking 🙏

Everything went well and I’m home. I feel it was a nice end to it without messy bleeding. And also I feel very calm and must say quite good - perhaps just drugged with all the painkillers and anaesthesia 😂 I’ll enjoy it while it lasts - not sure if my hormones are going to be all over the place in the next couple of days 🤷‍♀️

how everyone felt in terms of hormonal changes afterwards?

@Ingutwetrust im so glad you aren’t feeling too bad! I felt so surprised at how pain free I was afterwards!

I felt like mine dropped around day 2 but I also don’t know if that was it hitting me also.

I’m 11 days post op now and to be honest I have felt my worst this last 48 hours so I don’t know if that’s hormones as I’m still testing very positive

@Armdjm
how are you feeling now? Is it about a week after your procedure?
I’ve read the thread and saw you ended up in a&e with some bleeding. 🙏

@Armdjm oh, ignore the above - haven’t seen your post while typing. And thank you for your reply!
i think it’s natural for hormones to kick in as much as I don’t want to end up in mess and show it to my kiddo. It is a good idea to acknowledge it is inevitable and be prepared.

yes, they were telling to do pregnancy test after three week. Some of them are very sensitive and I sure it takes time to drop what your body was building for so long, so don’t worry about it yet. Take it day by day 🙏

@Ingutwetrust I did yes, it only lasted about 3-4 hours so they assumed retained tissue that I miscarried naturally!

But other than that my recovery has been so smooth you will be reassured to hear! I havnt had to wear a pad now for about 5 days and I’ve had no pain at all since that bleed. I am just battling my emotions at the minute, I feel how I did after I had my little girl where my emotions are just all over the place but I expected my hormones to be all over!

I know I keep telling myself they’re so sensitive and I was 11 weeks when I had the op so it’s a lot of HCG to go! I’m debating taking a bit more time off work but also feel like most people just get up on crack on and feel silly that I’m not!

@Armdjm take the time you need. I feel the exact same way, never off sick unless I’m physically unable to work 😅 but I went to the GP today mainly to get a sick note for the past week but I was discussing some of my symptoms with her (I’ve been feeling a little breathless but my blood count was fine so assuming I’m just recovering from the blood loss last week) and she’s signed me off for 28 days! She told me not to rush back. I’m not likely to take the full 28 days but it’s good to know I’ve got it if I need it..

I struggle with feeling guilty about not going to work even when I’ve got a sickness bug but realistically I’ve got nothing to be guilty about. It’s works of having a mum who worked in a school and wouldn’t let me take time off ill unless I was on my ass 🙄😂

I feel like a fraud now that the majority of my physical symptoms have resolved but I decided to strip the wallpaper in my lounge yesterday and almost fainted…

@Ingutwetrust aw I'm so glad it went as well as it good of! In regards to hormones, a couple of days after I was a complete bitch to everyone and anyone 🤣🤣

It will be 3 weeks this coming Thursday since I got the misoprostol. I'm still testing positive. I'm still bleeding 🙄🙄, which is absolute hell. I have the worst hormonal acne on my back and chest 😫😫

Don't feel guilty about taking time off. I took 3 weeks of. In the end, I wanted to get back to take my mind of it and to stop moping about. However, the girl who sits opposite me announced that she was pregnant with her third baby on Friday. Similar due date. Don't get me wrong I'm over the moon for her, but it's just going to prolong my healing process. It's just going to be so sad watching her going through the milestones that I should have been going through 🙁🙁

@Confusedmermaid1 It’s such a silly feeling isn’t it? I don’t know why we feel guilty being off. At the minute when I’m due back I’m only back for 2 weeks then on a weeks annual leave so I’m debating just extending my sicknote and going back after my annual leave.

I think because the ‘before’ process is so drawn out I feel like I’ve been off ages but also don’t want to rush back if I’m not emotionally well to be there. I want to feel like fully healed from it.

That was really good of your GP. How are you feeling?

@CJHR18 Oh I’m so sorry! A girl I work with is pregnant too, couple weeks behind me so I feel the same I’ll be watching her pregnancy thinking that’s how far I would be etc!

oh no are you? I’m day 13 after op and I’ve had no bleeding since about day 6/7 but still testing very positive! Are your lines still quite dark? Mine have definitely lightened but they’re still not faint! Were you told to ring them if they were still positive? I got told to take one at 3 weeks and if positive to ring them

@Armdjm It's so hard! I'm genuinely happy for her, but it does make my life harder.

Mine are super faint now! Squinters. I track BBT and that is pretty much back to normal too.

I went to the fertility clinic today and they're starting me on Metormin. Hopefully it helps to regulate my peroids and I can get back to ttc again.

Have you thought about trying again? Xx

@CJHR18 oh are they! That gives me hope that yours are that faint now!

Aw I’m glad they’re starting you on something. My friend had 2 successful pregnancies after starting on metformin

Yeah I think once I’ve had my 1st period we might try that cycle because mine can be so long I don’t have a period every 28 days sometimes it’s 40-50 days long

@Armdjm im doing okay thank you, how are you?

I think over the weekend I had a change in my hormones almost exactly the time frame that you said up thread.. my husband was out for a few hours and when he came back he asked how I was and I just burst into tears 😅 it wasn’t even about anything to do with what’s been happening.. just emotional

I’m glad I took this week, my work are being very supportive which is reassuring. I was stripping wallpaper today and I felt faint again so I’m keeping up with my iron supplements and I’ll mention it to the GP again if it continues but other than that physically all is normal. I tested this week and it’s fainter but still a definite positive, next week will be 3 weeks so I’m hoping for a negative test. I’ll probably test again Sunday and if it’s positive I’ll stay off because it’s likely I’ll need further treatment maybe.

@Confusedmermaid1 Im glad you’re okay! Yes definitely keep an eye on that and get your iron levels checked! Aw the emotions are hard aren’t they! So so hard.

I’m not too bad, I get emotional at times still but physically I feel absolutely fine! I’m just over 2 weeks now and it’s fainter but still obviously positive like you don’t have to hold it up to check or squint it’s very much there! I’ve told work I won’t be back next week as I’m due back Monday and that’s the day I have to tell EPU if I’m still testing positive and I just don’t feel fully ready yet and that is worrying me.

I ended up at my gynae ward today because I was still testing positive.

They asked me for a urine sample and I managed to pass a clump of what I can only describe as grayish looking tissue. The registrar wasn't completely sure what it was, so they've sent it off for testing! They said it could be pregnancy tissue or shedding of my uterus.

They did an examination and found more of it in my uterus and manually removed it 🤢 I've got to go the the EPU on Friday to get another ultrasound.

Fingers crossed that was the last of it!

@Armdjm i hope that we both get a negative soon. In my head that will be the point I can start moving forward properly but I don’t know if that’s wishful thinking..

@CJHR18 I’m sorry that sounds scary and confusing! I hope you get the all clear at your next scan.

@CJHR18 oh my gosh I’m so sorry that sounds awful! Did they scan you as well? How faint did your tests go?

God it’s just not straight forward at all is it!! Have you been having any pains/bleeding at all??