Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 9 ALL welcome

[Nic2908]

New thread before we all lose eachother xx

I'm so pleased your MC has happened without complication. It's a weird thing to be grateful for, but I know you've seen the other side of it, and we've got to take the wins when they happen in these times ❤️

A little update from me. I called the gynae ward at my local hospital this morning and explained everything. They asked me to come straight down and I saw a wonderful doctor. When she examined me it wasn't good news unfortunately. My cervix was open and the pregnancy was sat at the neck of my womb waiting to come out. So she removed it and has sent it away for testing. My scan on Thursday will now be to check that everything has come away and the miscarriage is complete.

I've got an overwhelming sense of relief this afternoon. To not be in limbo anymore and able to recover from this nightmare.

Thank you all for your support over the weekend x

@HerbaceousPerennial @JellyBean123456 im really sorry your MC’s have been confirmed. But I completely understand the relief that comes with not being in limbo. Really hope you are doing ok & can start to try & move forward.

I’m 4 days post surgery & the hormones are surging, had a very up & down day

@JellyBean123456 so sorry that you’re going through a loss but relieved for you to know the outcome.

Hi everyone, I’ve not caught up with the updates over the weekend but will have a read through.
That was my missed miscarriage confirmed today at the scan, should have been 9 but only measuring about 6 weeks.
The earliest they can take me for the mva is next Tuesday though and i’m worried that now I've stopped taking the progesterone pessaries that I’ll miscarry at home before that. Will just need to wait and see how it goes.

@JellyBean123456 I am so sorry this has ended in another miscarriage for you. Thinking of you and sending you strength.

@HerbaceousPerennial I'm glad your scan confirmed everything is complete and you can start to try and move forwards. I am feeling very up and down to honest. It's just such a weird limbo place to be.

@MarchAprilDecember it's not selfish at all to want another. We all picture our families in our heads, these look different for everyone, but it doesn't make being unable to have it any easier.

@Figtree11 I'm sorry you're on a hormonal rollercoaster. It's exhausting isn't it. Have you got any time off work this week?

@xxcxdonxx I'm so sorry your miscarriage has been confirmed and that you have such a wait for surgery.

I've had it confirmed I'm booked for surgery Fri morning after the second scan they've insisted on. Grateful that at least on that part they've moved things along a bit quicker for me. @xxcxdonxx I am not sure whether stopping the progesterone will start things. My embryo stopped growing around 2 weeks ago now I think, and no signs of anything starting here. @Figtree11 had your pregnancy symptoms started lessening before your surgery? Just wondering about the hormonal surge I may/may not have after Friday. Mine are definitely dropping to the point where they're hardly noticeable any more.

Hope everyone has had a nice weekend. I have taken two pregnancy tests in the last 24 hours and both negative (very very very faint line if you look hard enough) so guessing the tablets did work on Thursday which is a relief. A lot quicker than I expected as well to get negative tests had a feeling this would drag on, hopefully a positive sign for things to come and I won’t be waiting too long before I’m pregnant again x

Thanks @SErunner . It’s only because I’ve had some spotting and cramping while on them that I worry they were just keeping things going. You are right though and it might not do anything so just need to see how it goes.
Glad you have your surgery booked in for Friday, at least you know the physical side of things will be done quickly for you.

That’s good @Nicole90134 , it’s a strange one to wish to see the negative test but glad it’s not dragging on for you.

@xxcxdonxx I have been on progesterone lots of times as part of our IVF cycles and have had spotting and cramping with both unsuccessful and successful rounds, so I don't know whether it means anything. I don't know if that helps at all, but just thought I'd mention.

Just catching up, sorry to hear about MCs being confirmed but understand that sometimes it’s that relief that you know everything has passed and there is no longer any uncertainty.
Back to work for me today after a week off sick for the surgery and recovery. Hectic and I can feel my tolerance for stress is much lower than usual. All of the emotional stress wearing away at me. Will need to try and not overdo it which is hard in the job I do.

@SErunner thank you, I went back to work today. I needed the distraction, my mind is running away from me being at home.
My symptoms were lessening a week or so before the scan, but I noticed them tailing off even more once I stopped the progesterone, before my surgery. I had no spotting at all.
I think the day before & of the surgery it was just relief it was being resolved. I think the days after are hardest, as it’s coming to terms with what’s happened.
I really hope your surgery goes ok on Friday x

@Nicole90134 i am hoping my test doesn’t take too long to go faint. Last time it took 5 weeks! So expecting similar this time

@xxcxdonxx I don’t know if it helps but for my first miscarriage (anembryonic) nothing started until I took the pills. This one I did miscarry naturally, but actually it was easier, it was at least 3 weeks after embryo stopped developing before anything started and I had loads of notice of it, bleeding ramped up to heavy period levels about 24 hours before the miscarriage itself. I know they’re all different and it could happen, but hopefully gives you some comfort that it’s unlikely you’ll miscarry without any warning.

@SErunner I’m glad they’ve got you booked in but the wait is awful, I found it the most difficult bit. Once things got going I found it easier, so hopefully not long to go now. My symptoms had lessened before I physically miscarried but I did find both times that the aftermath was very much like a milder version of how it felt after full term birth, including night sweats and baby blues a few days later. I’m just trying to let the moods wash over me at the moment - agree very up and down but I’m working on the basis I feel how I feel.

@Figtree11 hope work is ok and provides the distraction you need. Mine’s a nightmare and I’ve just decided I can’t be doing with it at the moment! Got enough on with my son still off nursery after his op so very much putting work on the back burner. @CurlyWurly1991 a lot of empathy on the work front! I’m directing a lot of rage at them at the moment, I know the stress of my work didn’t cause the miscarriage really but it’s in the back of my mind it didn’t help.

@JellyBean123456 sorry you’ve been through all this but I’m glad you’re getting some closure and can move on. It is a massive relief

@Nicole90134 so glad your tests are looking nearly negative, that’s good going. Mine are definitely light but still positive after miscarrying Tuesday night/Wednesday morning

@HerbaceousPerennial

Absolutely agree about the aftermath being like after birth. It must be the hormone comedown. I’m waking in the night very sweaty and have had the baby blues… agree that letting it wash over us is the only way. Having an outlet for the rage would help - unfortunately I am too busy with work and not able to schedule much in the way of exercise but I know that would be therapeutic right now. Hitting a tennis ball or kicking a football would really appeal!! Think I’m going to try and book a day of AL for next week. It really sucks when colleagues ask if I’m feeling better… they don’t know why I was off… having to force a smile isn’t easy.

Had my second scan today which confirmed everything had come away. She could tell I had ovulated too so said I should expect a normal cycle but not to panic if my period is late. I feel relieved that I know that’s it’s all done and complete but just so sad that I’m back at square one.
I thought my bleeding would have been heavier or more painful, it was uncomfortable but wasn’t agony which I’m really grateful for as I know some women has e suffered terribly with heavy bleeds and painful cramps. Just in case anyone is worrying about the pain to come like I was- it might not be as bad- it’s all just individual.

I think it’s not knowing that has been so hard. Glad to move on. Hoping and praying you all get the babies you long for in 2025 xxx

I work in a school and being happy around kids has been difficult. You have to give yourself the space to take a moment. I’ve had staff as me if I’m all better now which I hard when I wasn’t sick but don’t want them to know the truth because I don’t want to have to face it every day.

@MarchAprilDecember i’m sorry, although it’s good news that everything is complete, it still hurts to hear that.

I get annoyed at the ‘square one’ aspect too, feel like I have almost wasted time on pregnancies that weren’t viable. That sounds horrible to say out loud too.

It’s mad to think we are looking at 2025 already x

Hi everyone,
Also agree about being back to square one. I've been mostly either pregnant or miscarrying since mid December with absolutely nothing to show for it. First miscarriage my baby was due very end of August and this one was due mid December.

Ordered ovulation tests from Amazon ready to start testing when my pregnancy tests go negative (still got a line on although not blazing positive like they used to be).

I also have a scan tomorrow, which will now be used to tell if I've passed everything rather than check in on our baby as it was booked for originally. Feeling rather empty and sad today, we do want to try again but at the same time I'm terrified of being pregnant again in case I lose another!

Empathising hugely with the 'square one' feeling. It just feels like such a lot of wasted time. I think that's why this extra week has frustrated me so much, just another week wasted. I know it's not long in the grand scheme of things, but it still feels hard.

@MarchAprilDecember I'm glad your scan went well and glad it hasn't been too painful for you.

It has been really helpful to hear how some of you have felt post surgery - thank you for sharing. I was very weepy for a few days post birth with my daughter so at least feel a bit prepared that may happen after Friday as well.

I have also put work on the back burner this week and have taken it off. Hoping to be back on Monday though, I think I need to start getting back to some 'normalities'.

@JellyBean123456 I am sorry, that is really rough using the same scan booking. I hope it goes okay and will think of you.

Agreed about back to square one :( I would be due to go on maternity leave in 4 weeks time for my June baby.
Yet here I am having lost another, and no idea when my cycles will return so I can try again.
Urgh its just so unfair, I’ve had enough

@CurlyWurly1991 I am so so sorry to read you had another miscarriage. That's so so crappy. Sending you lots of love ❤️

@ThelastRolo20 How are you doing lovely? Did you wait to TTC until May like you were planning?

I'm absolutely gutted to be back here.

I had a MMC (found at my 12 week scan, measuring 8+4) at the end of October last year and ended up needing 2 d&c's to clear it. It was a horribly traumatic experience and I've only recently felt like I was truly moving forward.

I had a 12 week scan for a new pregnancy on Friday and although the baby had a heartbeat, the NT was 4.2 and there were indications of hydrops. We went back for a consultant appointment yesterday (which happened to be the due date for our previously lost baby) and found out that our baby died over the weekend. We'd been trying to keep our expectations really low but it's still awful.

I have a d&c booked for tomorrow. I'm grateful they can do one as I'm right at the limit for my hospital, with baby measuring 12+2. They're going to do genetic testing this time because of the hydrops, but they think it's due to me catching parvovirus at around 7 weeks. I didn't even realise what the rash was at the time, let alone know it could be dangerous in pregnancy.

Has anyone else had more than one MMC in a row? Did you feel almost numb the second time around? I'm having occasional crying fits but generally feel quite detached from it all this time.

@Sherw00d I’m so, so sorry this has happened to you. What an absolutely shit situation to be in. I am sending a massive handhold, it’s so unfair that you are going through this. This is my second MMC too, but a less traumatic situation perhaps. Heartbeat at 7+1, diagnosed loss just before my 12 week scan and agree I have felt much more - I’m not sure, sometimes detached, sometimes calm - about it all, interspersed with bouts of intense grief and distress. But not like the first one, where I think I struggled to grasp that it could be happening to me. I’m not sure if I’ve not processed it yet, or if I’m just more ok about it. Here to listen whenever you need to talk.

@Figtree11 @SErunner @JellyBean123456 @xxcxdonxx another one pissed off at being back to square one. I worked out I’ve been pregnant or miscarrying for 8 and a half of the last 10 months which is not a good rate! Although honestly I think I found the 6 weeks TTC the worst of the whole lot. I’m also really annoyed I’ve more or less completed the first trimester (with all the morning sickness and crap that entails) twice with nothing to show for it, except admittedly maybe a healthier liver. My first due date was in April so I should be on mat leave now. It sucks. It sucks for all of us and I am so angry about it!

I’m so so sorry @Sherw00d i had my second MMC in a row last week. Found at my 12wk scan too. I am feeling right in the depths of grief at the moment. The beginning days weren’t too bad, but I’m feeling it this week

It is so devastating, I truly am so sorry