Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 8 ALL welcome!

[Sunbird24]

Exactly as the thread title says.
Some links to online resources that may be useful to anyone currently or recently going through this awful experience:

www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/
www.tommys.org/
Www.miss-support.org.uk/support/
www.blr.lifecharity.org.uk/
www.petalscharity.org/

www.miscarriageformen.com/

You are not alone - please post whatever you need, or just read if you aren’t ready to talk.

Link to previous thread:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/miscarriage/4732386-support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-mcmmc-thread-7-all-welcome?page=1

@Loz365 I can only imagine how you'll be feeling, that must be so difficult. When I just had my MMC someone I know and have on Facebook shared an announcement post of their family member's August baby. That was what I was supposed to be me and at that point I was recovering from surgery. The girl swiftly got deleted and it wasn't even her having the baby! Hope you're ok. I'm sure you'll be sharing the same news soon x

Hello,

sorry to hear about all of your experiences- what a shitty club this is.

I’ve just experienced my 4th loss since October 2022 (I have a DC who is nearly 3.5years old). It took us 13 months to conceive since the last loss (chemical). Under the care of the recurrent miscarriage clinic at my hospital. I have stopped taking progesterone as my bloods came back negative. Had a scan which couldn’t see anything so had the loss just after finding out I was pregnant again - the progesterone did its job and I wasn’t bleeding. Does anyone have experience of stopping progesterone? When should I expect my period? Will it mess with my cycle?

thank you. 💕

Thanks for the check in @nearly8. I have been ok. Took some time off MN as it was making me anxious. Maybe a good thing as I am now very anxiously and tentatively celebrating a positive pregnancy test this morning.

@Orlahoping omg that is the best news to wake up to today. Congratulations sweet 🎉 I know the anxiety you are feeling right now but I am keeping everything crossed for you my darling. Please please keep me updated where you can, so genuinely happy for you 😍 take care 😘

@Orlahoping aww congratulations to you! I know how nerve-wracking that'll be. I hope it all works out for you 🩷

@nearly8 and @jellyfish2 thank you so much. I obviously hope this works out but my goodness the anxiety is sky high right now!

Wishing everyone a gentle week 💖

@Orlahoping I know exactly how you feel Hun. Take each day as it comes and try to find time to smile 😊 congratulations again sweet 🤗

Had my first tablet for the mmc at 0930 said I have to take the next lot on Thursday and not to expect much between then and now but I’ve got nothing no cramps no blood. Is that normal? X

Hi all, I’ve not been on this thread since around early March when I got a BFP.
Went to my 12wk scan today where the baby had no heartbeat. Second MMC in 5 months. Booked in for a D&C tomorrow. I’m scared as I had medical management last time.
I am so heartbroken. I’m so worried ill never get to have a baby

@Figtree11 I'm so so sorry to hear that. Will they do any tests for you? I was so glad to get the surgery as it was over really quickly, very minimal pain and bleeding and all the staff were so lovely. Sending you so much love 💕

Thank you @jellyfish2 yes they are going to send it off for testing. And I’ve been given a leaflet about getting tests through Tommys. I need to get an appointment with my GP and then they should be able to refer me there now that I’ve had 2.
I had no idea when starting this journey that I’d be in a position where I was being referred for tests as I can’t sustain a pregnancy

@Figtree11 I am so, so sorry to hear that. I hope referrals come through quickly.

I'm glad to hear you're getting tests done etc and they're not saying to wait for a potential third. It's just so awful. Hope you get answers quickly and I hope your surgery goes well 🩷

Yep totally normal, I had a tiny bit of spotting the following day and very mild odd cramp. Hoping Thursday goes as well as it possibly can. When you take the pessaries lie down for a good few hours so they don’t fall out. My experience was severe cramping (guessing not far off what contractions feel like) after about 3 hours which ramped up when I started to pass pregnancy. I set up camp in the bathroom (towels out and my pillow, a little blanket for the fluctuating temps, hot water bottle, painkillers, pads, water etc) and just saw it through in there for a few hours. severe pain stopped abruptly once sac etc passed and went usual (still v painful) period cramp level. I took painkillers every 2 hours during the worst of it. Xx

I am so so so so sorry to hear this. I have so much hope for everyone on this thread and this is just so sad. I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow and hope it goes as ok as it possibly can.
I’m also starting to have the ‘this could never happen for me worry and pani’ so totally feel you on that.

Sending you huge hugs and we’re all here if you need to talk xxxx

Thank you @H20202

Thank you @H20202 & @jellyfish2

@jellyfish2 how long were you in hospital for with the procedure? I’ve been told to be there for 7.30, but might not actually go down for it til 12. Did you DP go home & then come back to get you?

I was the afternoon slot, I think it was 11 or something I was in for and then I didn't get taken until around 4pm. I was home by 9pm. I had to eat and drink before I left but I was absolutely fine afterwards and it felt like everything was a blur to be honest, like it didn't physically happen. So, I was a mess and he was initially told to leave but a kind nurse saw how upset I was and got me my own room so he was with me the whole time except when I had to go for the operation. He was able just to sit in the room and wait for me. All the day surgeries are lumped in together so the woman who dealt with me initially wasn't very nice and I actually emailed the hospital to complain and said that all the staff on that ward should be made aware of surgeries like that as she had no idea why I was so upset, meanwhile I'm sitting with others having knee replacements and such. Once the staff knew why I was there, they couldn't have been nicer and I took chocolates and a card up afterwards to say thank you. One of the nurses who was working when I went back, she remembered me and gave me a huge hug, it was lovely.

Thank you @jellyfish2 for sharing your experience. I’ve never been put to sleep so feeling apprehensive about it. But keeping thinking that hopefully by this time tomorrow it will be done & I’ll be home again

@Figtree11 it's like the best sleep you'll ever have! I was the same. The anaesthetist was amazing and told me to imagine being on holiday etc. Next thing I knew, I was awake and it was all over. I can only imagine how awful medical management was so I'm sure in comparison you'll feel somewhat relieved with the surgery. I really hope it goes ok, please let us know how you get on x

@Figtree11 I’m so sorry to hear you have had a second MMC. I am just recovering from my second one and had surgical management for both (first was early January). I’m glad you are having them tested, I was told I needed to have 3 MCs before any testing, and they would only test the third onwards so I thought what’s the point in that! I am pretty sure it’s due to chromosomal issues because I’m 37 and DH is 46.
Surgical management was fine for me both times, recovery has been good and the worst bit was them putting the cannula in my hand and some side effects from the anaesthesia and antibiotics (just fatigue/drowsy for a day or two).
I had mine yesterday and have hardly bled today.
I just couldn’t face medical management and the risk of it taking a long time, pain etc. It’s hard enough losing a baby let alone all of the trauma of the process.
Wishing you the very best xxx

Thanks @jellyfish2 that’s reassuring. The medical route was horrific, and the nurse advised not to do it again as the pregnancy was further along so would be more painful.
Thanks so much x

@CurlyWurly1991 that’s so rubbish they won’t do any testing for you. I find it so strange that every place seems to have different rules. I’m glad the surgery went ok for you yesterday. We are 32 and 33, and just never thought this would be in our path to trying to start a family. I thought 1 was bad luck, but I am feeling really concerned now with what my future holds

So sorry @Figtree11

I hope everything goes ok tomorrow. As well as it can do I mean. I had a MMC at 11 weeks just over 2 weeks ago and I was meant to have surgical management, however I wasn’t booked in for 5 days and sadly I started bleeding in my own and the whole thing was utterly distressing so I definitely think surgical is a slightly less traumatic route.

I’ve had 3 other previous MC, but never a MMC until now, and I can honestly say it was by far the worst. I think I feel like my body has deceived me.

I’m sending you all the love and support for tomorrow xx

@Figtree11 I'm so sorry you're going through this. You're not alone, I'm also 32, DH is 34 and I've just had my 2nd MC which was a MMC. Ended up passing it naturally but it took 4 weeks and I've only just got my negative test. If I'd known it was going to take this long I would have chosen surgical management.
My EPU has kindly referred me to recurrent miscarriage clinic and I'm glad I don't have to wait for a 3rd MC to have the tests done but honestly it has devastated me. I'm finding myself thinking and worrying about it all the time at the moment. I have PCOS and had to take letrozole to get pregnant both times, it feels extra awful that not only can I not get pregnant naturally but I can't sustain it either. I'm sure things will feel less raw in time, allow yourself time to grieve.

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow 💐

Hi all,

I am due to be taking medication for a mmc this week (8 weeks with twins but stopped growing at 6).

I’m really scared - do you think it would be better to go back and ask for surgical? My dr is great and suggested this early, the pills are a better option.