Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 8 ALL welcome!

[Sunbird24]

Exactly as the thread title says.
Some links to online resources that may be useful to anyone currently or recently going through this awful experience:

www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/
www.tommys.org/
Www.miss-support.org.uk/support/
www.blr.lifecharity.org.uk/
www.petalscharity.org/

www.miscarriageformen.com/

You are not alone - please post whatever you need, or just read if you aren’t ready to talk.

Link to previous thread:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/miscarriage/4732386-support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-mcmmc-thread-7-all-welcome?page=1

@purplecolouroffunk how are you today? I was out yesterday for a day with my friends which I think I needed. It's weird though as I constantly think about my little one and how I should be about 22 weeks now etc.
I think for the parents they're so sad that you are going through such a horrible situation and just want to take the pain away for you. You'll be up and down for a while. Are you off work? I even dreaded going into work incase someone blindsided me. I had a colleague ask recently if I was going to have another baby (he didn't know about my MC) and I broke down. He was a bit in shock but then it turned out him and his wife experienced similar in between their children. So many people experience it and don't talk about it, it's crazy! I feel like next time (hopefully it happens) that I want to keep the pregnancy between me and my partner til the 12 week scan but I'm not sure I'll manage it. I guess if we told parents again then theyd be cautiously happy because of what's happened but before they hadn't had any experience with mc so didn't even think anything would go wrong.

@nearly8 how are you?🩷

@jellyfish2 I'm not too bad thanks Hun. Still working 🤣 think I might be in my fertile period this month (not tracking but had ewcm a few days) have DTD but am actually terrified of getting pregnant after what's happened. Also will be hugely disappointed if AF shows up. Such shit emotions and not helped by being mightily depressed about the 2st weight gain in the past 6months. How's things with you ATM? Hope you've enjoyed the sunshine today. Take care Hun 💐💐

Hi all,

For all those who are wondering about ovulation after MMC .
I had surgical MMC on 2nd of May. Bleeding stopped on 9th of May. Bleeding started again on 13th of May (which i am still unsure if it was period or from MMC as it was veerrrryyy light but fresh blood sorry for TMI) and it lasted till 17th of May i.e. 5 days (which is my normal period cycle)
The desperate me started doing clear blue ovulation tests from 18th of May. Got flashing smiley on 20th, 21st and 22nd of May morning. Tested again on 22rd May evening around 6:30 PM. Static smiley which i think means i will ovulate within 24-48 hours.

Fingers crossed

I am currently going through a miscarriage. After 2 healthy and normal pregnancies this has hit me like a tonne of bricks. I was 7 weeks along but went for an early scan because I felt all my symptoms leave. I ended up with an empty sack. Bleeding started that night, I guess my mind just needed to hear that the pregnancy was over. Bleeding has been consistent but I’ve hardly passed many clots, just one big one. Bleeding and cramping seems to be winding down- can this be it? Is it coming to an end? I have an appointment at the EPAU tomorrow morning. Don’t know what to expect. I’m just so heart broken, this baby was so wanted. I don’t know if I want to try again- never want to go through this again.

Hi all, I'm back again unfortunately from my mmc in December. Found out at my scan on Monday baby has no heartbeat and it is a partial molar pregnancy so they booked me for surgical management yesterday morning and now have to have my hcg monitored on a weekly/fortnight basis till it drops to below 5 (currently 160000 even though I'm meant to be 8 weeks and baby stopped growing at 6 weeks) as it can turn cancerous. Has anyone had this before and shed some light into what I'm in for.

I lost my 7 week pregnancy at the start of this month so I know exactly how you're feeling. How long has the bleeding been going on? I only bled for 6 days, passed a large clot (the pregnancy) on day 3 but had very little else pass apart from blood. Scan at EPU on day 7 showed the miscarriage was complete so I didn't need any further intervention. So the good news was it all came out naturally.

Let us know how your appointment goes today. Sending you a big hug 🌺

@MarchAprilDecember also just wanted to say that in the midst of my miscarriage I also thought that I never wanted to put myself through pregnancy again (it was my first pregnancy, no kids) so I understand your thought process. You might mull it over and still come to that decision and that's okay. Within a week of my mc my mindset changed and I was back to craving to have a baby no matter what. Whatever you feel in the moment is totally okay and normal and it's also okay if it changes, or doesn't, later on down the line 💞

@CadoAvo thank you so much. So sorry for your loss too. I have renewed understanding after going through this.
Had my scan and the gestational sack is still there. It now had a very very small yolk sack. She said I was measuring 5w2d which would means I would have had to conceive this baby the week after I had BFP. So it can’t be right and I’m expecting to miscarry. Couldn’t believe it was still there after all the bleeding.
anyone else had similar experiences? How long can this go on for ? I have to go back in 2 weeks and feel like the wait is horrendous.

@MarchAprilDecember oh you poor thing, asking to wait for 2 weeks is horrendous. My EPU only had a 1 week wait between scans. And it was the dating that threw me off too, at 6 weeks they measured me 5 weeks which didn't make sense but at the time they seemed positive. Bleeding started 4 days after that first scan. From what I read online during this time, it could go either way for you. I've read many stories of women in the exact same position and to their shock the next scan showed a growing baby etc. Likewise many people, like me, have it ending in bad news.

If I were you I'd be inclined to go for another private scan next week to break up the wait, or contact EPU again if anything changes in regards to pain, bleeding etc.

I will say this though, the waiting to find out was truly the worst part. Once we had it confirmed, yes it was sad but it was a relief to just know and start the process of grieving and moving forward.

Has anyone ever had a missed miscarriage? What happens and how long did it take? The spotting seems to be getting heavier over the last couple of days how long can I expect this to last? I have been told to wait a week so I can have another ultrasound before they will give me anything to help why is this?

Just to add to the above I should have been 10 weeks but scan measured 9 with no heartbeat so there is no chance that if I wait for another scan the outcome will change. I had already seen a heartbeat earlier at a private scan

I've had 2, my most recent on Monday. With my 1st in December, it took 3 weeks from when baby's heart stopped beating. You should be given the option of waiting, medical management or surgical management depending on how far along you are. I was told with mine this week I needed surgical management as it was also showing to be a partial molar pregnancy so they booked me in for the next day.

How far along are you? Have you had a scan to confirm mmc?

Yes I’ve had a scan and they want to do a second next Thursday. I should have been 10 weeks today but scan was showing 9 weeks on Tuesday so nearly a week behind with no heartbeat. What is the purpose of a second scan? X

I imagine it would be to confirm although if there's no heartbeat when baby is measuring 9 weeks they shouldn't really need to. I was 8 weeks and baby was measuring 2 weeks smaller but sac was shown to be bigger and they only did 1 scan with me as at that point they'd expect to see a heartbeat. I would call and ask them to clarify why you need a 2nd scan as it seems odd

@Nicole90134
baby had heartbeat at 6w.
spotting started at 7w
start and stop very tiny amounts over the next 3 weeks
8w confirmed mc
9w still on off spotting which never got going
9+5 opted for medical management

it was nearly 4 weeks from when baby died to my mc completing - and that was only because I took the meds in the end.

it could start tomorrow, it might be weeks, there’s no definitive unfortunately, everyone’s different.

you should have been given s options re management not told you have to wait. Definitely give them a call if you want to opt for medical or surgery.

So sorry you’re going through this x

@H20202

thanks for this. My spotting also started at 6w but I had a scan at 6+5 and was fine andcontinued to grow until 9 found out at 10 because the spotting looked different. I’m now wondering if I was always going to miscarry and that is why I started spotting.

they have said I can something but I need to have wait a week and have a second scan then they will discuss options with me. It just seems cruel when there is no chance of it being wrong as I’m too far ahead for there to be no heart beat x

Hi everyone, I see some familiar names here.
I had a MMC in January and surgical management at what should have been 9 weeks.
Ive just had an nhs scan (wrangled by my midwife as I’m having PGP pain) and sadly it’s another MMC this time baby stopped developing around 8 weeks (should be 9+2).
hoping I can do surgical management again early next week as DD10 doesn’t know about either pregnancy and I’m trying to protect her from all of this.
devastated as I had no signs of anything being wrong. No spotting and have nausea (albeit milder than with my daughter) I didn’t think that was a cause for a concern. I feel completely pregnant.
I don’t think we will continue TTC now as 2 MMCs in a row is likely due to our ages and I don’t think I can put myself through this again.

@CurlyWurly1991 so sorry to see you here 💕

@CurlyWurly1991 I’m so sorry - I recognise you from the Nov thread too 😔
How old are you? I’m 37 no children so we’ll be trying again but not just yet, want some time to recover. X

Thank you x I’m 37 and have one dd 10 who I am so so grateful for.

@CurlyWurly1991 I'm so sorry to see you here. I also recognise you from the Nov thread.
Look after yourself, it's so cruel 💕

I'm now 4 weeks post confirmation of MMC. Had another bleed at the weekend and I think that must have been the last of it because I tested again today and it's super super light. Hoping that the end now, will test again at the weekend to make sure it's negative otherwise I'll have to contact EPU next week. I just really don't want to have to go back.

Can I ask for those of you that went on to try again, when do you start? Did you wait until your next period?

@Loz365 after ectopic I had to wait 3 months but we started straight after this, took 5 months to conceive after the 3.
this time we’re going to wait for at least one cycle, maybe two depends on the miscarriage clinic wait! X

@CurlyWurly1991 I'm so so sorry you're going through this pain once again. Absolutely devastating. Especially when there are no signs and you still feel pregnant, it's so cruel and unfair. .
You might change your mind with ttc in time once you get over the shock and give yourself time to grieve.
Hope you get your surgery asap and that you're as ok as can be 🩷

@Loz365 I had surgery in early Feb for my MMC. I had a very very light period after 6 and a half weeks. Because of that we skipped a month as it was freaking out at how non existent it was (I also had a positive on frer as I started bleeding so unsure if it was a CP.) there was so much going on I needed the time. Today is cd1 on my second period and it's closer to how it was before although still a bit light. We're going to give it a go this month as I now feel more ready. I'm sorry you've gone through a mc too, it's just shit.