Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 5. ALL welcome!

[Sunbird24]

Previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4190003-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC-Thread-4-ALL-welcome

@Tofu35 hehe thank you. Yeah that might be an idea. I know her SIL is also pregnant and her friend so i think I'd just feel a bit of a mess especially driving an hour home all along after being surrounded by excited (and rightly so) pregnant friends all talking about how they are feeling etc.

I might have a chat my MIL and suggest a smaller low key thing just us 3 and my other SIL.

It's her 2nd baby too and I think she would understand, I hope so anyways.

I survived the first day back.

Only one colleague commented on me being off before Christmas and I just brushed it off.
It's not that I'm ashamed, I'm not. it's just private and none of their business. Also talking about it makes me weepy still. I don't need to be like that at work.

How are you all doing ladies?

@Tofu35 you’re my hero for that - well done for setting that boundary. We have to do it to protect ourselves - other people won’t do it for us as they don’t understand how it feels.

I just back from my D&C and I am feeling relieved we can move forward.

I was wondering, has anyone had testing for miscarriage? Although I have only had one, we had 3 rounds of IVF to get to this pregnancy and I want to eliminate other causes before we go ahead and use our last frozen embryo. I know I will have to do it privately as won’t be referred but we are very fortunate that we should be able to cover it.

Glad all went well today ladies. Confirmation scan today, nothing has changed (as expected seeing as my body doesn’t seem to want to let go) MVA booked for tomorrow which as weird as it may seem feels like a bit of a relief. Will be glad when we get to this time tomorrow and I can start to relax and recover without the uncertainty of the MMC hanging over me

Glad you survived your first day back @willow1981, it is completely up to you who you tell and who you don't. Your miscarriage, your rules.

Sorry @HopeSpringsEternal123 can't help you there, I never went down the private testing route. I totally understand why you want to make sure there's nothing more you can do before you try again, I hope whether you do or don't go down this route, you'll find peace of mind.

Be thinking of you tomorrow @Maybepossibly22, hoping tomorrow is the start of your recovery from this time xx

@Maybepossibly22 good luck for tomorrow. xx

@Tofu35 OK thanks very much, I’m wanting some more reassurance even though prob not needed so just going to do some research.

It’s a new year ladies, 🤞 fingers crossed for better luck this year xx

New job was nice today. Was such a relief to not have time to think of everything!!!

@HopeSpringsEternal123 I'm glad everything went ok and that you feel some movement forward x I asked GP for tests after my second MMC. I said my mental health can't take another loss to get to three for them to look at me . They thoroughly tested my bloods- all came back fine and I have a pelvic scan to look at my uterus next Monday. That's the most they could offer but Ill take it!

@Maybepossibly22 I'm so sorry but I hope everything goes as well as it can under these circumstances... x

@Willow1981 glad work was ok and that you managed to get through.

@Doodledeedum ah thank you that’s really helpful, going to look into that.

Thinking of you @maybepossibly22.
For me, knowing my body is ready to try again helps. I just have to be sure my mind and DH are ready.

Rather stupidly I lurked on the due June thread today. Made me sad for where I should have been if things had gone differently.

@Willow1981 I did the same with the June thread today and found it v hard. Not sure why I want to punish myself with that, just better not to look

Wishing you all the best for today @Maybepossibly22

I also lurked know the July/August thread a couple of days after my MVA - I vowed never to do it again and have unwatched the thread. It was just too sad.

Has anyone else been uncomfortable with seeing a pregnant friend or family member? One of my best friends from knows what I've got going on, and knows we struggled TTC in the first place, and is messaging me quite regularly to go for a walk. I realise that she's just being supportive and trying to be a good friend, but she's 6 months pregnant (and her due date is my birthday). I don't really want to see her as I think it will be a trigger, but I haven't told her that. I'm just avoiding her! Has anyone else been in a similar boat? How did you handle it? Is it unreasonable to say I don't want to see her yet as it's too soon?!

Oh @willow1981 that is so difficult, sometimes our curiosity is our worst enemy. Hope you can take some time to work through some of those feelings today, we'll all get back on those months threads one day 💐

@FieldView Yes!! One of my best friends is due a week before I would of been. I was due to meet up before Christmas but couldn't face it..I've finally just met up with her and it was fine. I had built it up in my head but I find talking about it with her helped, Strangely enough...( she's also had a previous MC) but I totally get where u are coming from. Give it time xx

@FieldView I just said I wasn't up to seeing anyone and I was going through a difficult patch X

Thank you for your kind thoughts you lovely bunch. MVA was successful today, I feel a bit tired and drained but otherwise relieved that the physical ordeal is all over, for anyone reading that is anxious about going through it - i found it ok considering what was happening, I had gas and air which was a nice distraction and the nurses were just wonderful. I feel fine now, a light period bleed but no cramps as such. Looking forward to moving on and trying again in the near future.

Your support has been incredible over the past few days

@FieldView I’m in a similar situation with a friend. I ended up sending her a message to explain what had happened. I told her I wasn’t comfortable meeting up in person yet but I was happy for her to message me and chat over the phone. She was really understanding and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted as I was putting a lot of pressure on myself to see her.

@Maybepossibly22 So glad the MVA went well Here’s to some BFP’s in 2022 x

Well I’m back - I stepped away because I was pregnant again, but I’ve just had an 8 week scan and there’s no heartbeat, so this is MMC number 5 (the 4th since Nov 2020)

I’m so sorry @Sunbird24

@Sunbird24 I’m so sorry! It’s heartbreaking x

So sorry for your loss @Sunbird24 💐

@Sunbird24 so sorry to hear that 💞💐 xx

So very sad to hear that @Sunbird24

Oh @sunbird24 I so hoped for you when you stepped away. I am so sorry for your loss. You are so strong to have recovered 4 times before, you will again.

@Sunbird24 I'm am SO SO sorry to read this.... wishing you all the strength in the world 😞

Thinking of you @Sunbird24