Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 4. ALL welcome!

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www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4166715-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC-Thread-3-ALL-welcome?pg=1

@CurbsideProphet yes, I’ve called and left a message, hopefully they’ll ring me back.

@Sunbird24 I hope they've called you back 💐

I called 111, they gave me the number for the delivery suite at the next nearest hospital so I spoke to a gynae doctor there who said there’s nothing I can do except try to collect the embryo myself, and go to A&E if it turns into another haemorrhage…

Oh no that's not overly unhelpful. When I was first referred to gynae assessment I was given the direct phone number. It's really poor that you have no way of contacting them before your procedure on Tuesday. I thought that would be standard.

Anyone would think nobody miscarries on a weekend isn’t it? 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’m off to A&E. FML.

So sorry @Sunbird24 I hope they help you.

When you feel stronger I would flag up with PALS that EPU / Gynae Assessment booked a procedure but gave you no way of contacting them. I was told repeatedly I should call with any concerns. It shouldn't be a postcode lottery for what level of care you receive during miscarriage.

At the very least during these covid times you would want to be able to tell them if you had a temp or cough.

On a drip and a blood transfusion now

@Sunbird24 💐💐

Sorry @Sunbird24

Hello everyone. May I join?
Had a missed miscarriage almost 3 weeks ago but hoping it’s ok if I lurk and pop on on this thread from time to time?

@Sunbird24 I am so sorry, i came on to see how you're doing and I am sorry this is happening 😔

@Yutes I hope you're ok x

They did emergency surgery under general anaesthetic at midnight last night as I’d passed 1.4kg of clots (equivalent in litres of blood loss) and they couldn’t get the bleeding to stop, but that did the trick AND they managed to get an embryo to send off for testing. Much better today, just completely knackered, thank you for thinking of me

@Sunbird24 oh my god... you must be exhausted. That's awful... I hope that you get some answers after going through all this ❤️

Hi ladies, is it ok to join? So sorry for all your losses, such an horrendous experience to go through, sending you all love at this difficult time. I’ve just suffered my 4th miscarriage, found out at 6.5 weeks that the baby’s heart rate was v slow, a week later a scan confirmed it hadn’t made it. I tried medical management and although went through the physical pain and torture of passing a lot of blood etc after three weeks it still wasn’t complete and I ended up having surgery last week (I had to have surgery for my first too). I’m now feeling very lost, I’m 42 (nearly 43), my first three miscarriages which occurred in the last few years were naturally conceived, this one was via IVF as time is against us (also diagnosed with DOR) Now feeling like it’s never going to happen :-(

I just want to get to a point where I feel better. I am getting there a bit at a time.

Love and strength to all

@IVF21 💐💐 IVF and surgical management of miscarriage for me too. It's very hard 💔

@IVF21 same here, except that my first was natural and the last 3 have all been IVF. This is a rubbish gang to need to join, but all the members are incredible.

I’m back to work this week, and I’ve been doing ok. But I finding them constant asking if I’m ok and how can they support me a bit tough. Does anyone have any tips?

Sorry @Yutes, all I can suggest is being honest with them, tell them you appreciate their concern but that you’re finding the constant asking if you’re ok a bit overwhelming. They might rein it in a bit if they realise it is actually the opposite of helpful, and if you tell them you will definitely let them know if there’s anything you need.
Totally get how you feel, I’ve still got a week on my sick note and both my boss and my deputy keep asking if I want to meet up for a coffee and a chat, but I really don’t.

Thanks @Sunbird24
Think I’m just struggling with being asked if I’m ok all the time. I’m back at work after a month, and while I’m up and down, I’m wondering whether I shouldn’t be ok?

Just want to get on with my life, I suppose

@Yutes I think people want to be supportive but don't know the right thing to say 💐

I had surgical management 2 weeks ago and still have some spotting. I don't know if I should be worried or not? I do my pregnancy test in 7 days.

@CurbsideProphet is it getting lighter or changing colour at all? I think you’re still in the realms of ‘normal’, but if you’re worried could you either call the EPU or maybe the Miscarriage Association helpline?

@Sunbird24 the spotting has been coming and going for the past week. I had nothing Sunday /Monday but then lunchtime today 2 spots on my underwear that looks red again. I've been under Gynae Assessment so I'll ring them tomorrow morning. They didn't give me any advice on when it should stop etc, I read the Miscarriage Association leaflet online that said 1-2 weeks. It also said I should go back to work quite quickly and get back into routine 🤔 so I've not been sure what is opinion and what is medical fact.

I reckon how long you take off work is entirely up to you, for me personally there’s a fine line between truly grieving and just plain wallowing, so I know if I take too long it’ll get harder to go back. I’ve only had 1 week off in the past, but definitely need two this time. Do what works for you, nobody else’s opinion counts for anything. Hope you get some good advice tomorrow when you call.