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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

TTC after miscarriage

575 replies

Winkle2020 · 02/01/2020 17:19

Hello Ladies

Please give me some hope and confidence. I have been through a miscarriage recently. Had d and c and then retained products. Had to wait for my first af 9 weeks after d and c. Now in the last scan I was told that almost everything is gone except that of a very very small 8mm tiny bit left which will eventually come out in the next cycle. Doc has asked me to wait for just one more cycle to ttc. Somehow in the length of this whole episode which dragged for 3 months now, I feel very hopeless and scared to death about ttc. I really want to hold a baby and have a second child. I sob everyday endlessly alone. There is no one to talk to, I have no sibling or close friends and lost my mother 2 years ago. I am a full time working women and it takes a toll on my emotional health. I am terrified and abosultely scared to death to go through this emotional pain again. When I was going through miscarriage this forum has been my single strong support and I have come back again to get some hope from you lovely ladies. Please help

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Trying93 · 03/02/2020 11:24

I've had alot on the last week so just catching up. Hows everyone feeling this week?

Original poster
Winkle2020 · 03/02/2020 22:53

@Moominmiss hello I am so sorry for what you have gone through. I am emotionally devastated too. I think you need to get your bloods done and see what’s the level of hcg. Also did you have a scan to confirm for rpoc because for me even after a d and c had retained products and I had to wait two cycles to pass them

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Original poster
Winkle2020 · 03/02/2020 22:55

@Trying93 how have you been ? Are you managing to try ? Are you in your fertile window now ? With a toddler at home and a full time job I am so dead every evening. But still trying to DtD

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Katy0000 · 03/02/2020 23:54

I'm a bit fed up.Cremation is this Saturday & to add to it I'm not sure I ovulated this month..I'm on day 16 & no ewcm like last month,also tests haven't shown a surge x

Original poster
Winkle2020 · 04/02/2020 00:23

Katy I get what you going through. Cremation is very painful, I hope you have good support at home. Always talk to us

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Trying93 · 05/02/2020 11:48

@Winkle2020 yeah im in my fertile window, not tried much because I've been working late shifts this week. Not had a positive opk yet tho so fingers crossed it comes next few days when im off work.

We're moving house this month so not stressing too much this month about getting pregnant. Got a million and one other things to do.

Hope you manage to fit in DTD

dm14 · 06/02/2020 16:08

Hi everyone first AF been and gone! I'm now in a fertile window according to the Flo app. Would anyone recommend ovulation tests? Hope everyone is doing ok 😘

Original poster
Winkle2020 · 07/02/2020 15:57

@dm14 what a relief that you can try again :) so this month I have just used an ovulation calculator to find my fertile window and DTD around that dates. I am not sure why but I did not want to use any ovulation kits or anything. as per my cycle, I am on CD18 today. I am planning to have some BD to make sure we cover all the bases.

I have read in many forums that when you let go it will automatically happen, honestly, I don't know how to do that? My world revolves around a full-time job, a 2-year toddler and my hubby. I don't have time to divert myself other than binging on Netflix.

How are you planning?

I hope everyone in this thread gets a BFP soon.

@Trying93 how you doing, did you track ovulation ?

@Katy0000 @LittleGem638 @MamaDane @Moominmiss how you guys doing update us please ...really need some lady talk

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dm14 · 07/02/2020 16:54

@Winkle2020 yeah I know what you mean when I first fell pregnant it wasn't planned but now we know how much we want to be parents it feels slightly more pressured but we will just keep track with the Flo app it seems to be accurate up to now just hoping I get to be a mum soon!! Xx

Trying93 · 07/02/2020 21:53

Everyone says when you stop trying it will happen. I dont know how to stop lol if anyone has any tips please let me know 😂

@Winkle2020 I've been using opks had some high ones but not a peak. Pretty sure I've missed it now.

Katy0000 · 08/02/2020 11:12

Hi

Sounds like we all have a good chance of a positive result this cycle..I don't feel like we dtd enough or had a proper peak on the ovulation tests but still you never know.
Apparently you're more fertile after a miscarriage..
Today is our babies 'communal cremation' it's hard to say goodbye when you can't attend,& to work out what to do with yourselves on this day..I am still trying to think of a way to mark the occasion but nothing seems enough.

X

Trying93 · 08/02/2020 17:39

@Katy0000 thinking of you 💕 today must be so tough

Katy0000 · 08/02/2020 19:20

Thank you so much.
It's almost over so another milestone survived!

dm14 · 08/02/2020 20:07

@Katy0000 thinking of you ( sorry been busy in work) ❤️

Katy0000 · 08/02/2020 22:22

Thankyou dm14 xx

Original poster
Winkle2020 · 09/02/2020 01:16

@Katy0000 hello Katy, your lovely child will be your guardian angel. Can’t explain in words how I feel for you. Loads of hugs. We will stick together.

You are brave brave mama. I was like you taking it day by day. We will pass this phase. Lots of love 💕

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Original poster
Winkle2020 · 10/02/2020 11:36

Hello ladies, I think I need to talk to you all...hope things started good for you this week. For me its cd21. I am monitoring my cm this month not doing any opks. Mine has turned into creamy texture (sorry tmi). I noticed bleeding gums this morning when brushed. af is not due for another 10 days and I am already too emotional. My best friend texted me this morning that she had a girl baby. We both planned our pregnancies together and I lost my little one in the journey.

I am very happy for her, but I am uncontrollably crying and dont want to talk to anyone. I am being very sensitive today.

I dont know whom to reach out I am at work and its really difficult. My husband seems to console me whenever I share my feelings with him but its not helping.

I really hope this is our month to all of us...

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Katy0000 · 10/02/2020 17:44

Aw Winkle,you have made it this far through the day,& sometimes all that you can do it plod on until it's time to sleep.
We all have tough days & this is one of yours,hopefully tommorow can only be better?
Hope it helps a bit that we all understand & are here to listen xx

Original poster
Winkle2020 · 11/02/2020 07:51

@Katy0000 thank you katy for your words. My husband picked me from work sday really nice of him to do that. He knew I wasn’t ok. I feel a little better today. How are you

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Trying93 · 11/02/2020 15:55

@Winkle2020 sorry to hear you had a bad day yesterday, hope your feeling a bit better today.

Like @katy0000 said I think you just have bad days and you need to have a cry.

Katy0000 · 11/02/2020 18:06

Glad you are feeling a bit better,it's the little things like getting picked up that give us comfort & keep us going.
When is AF due?I hope it's good news instead 😘

dm14 · 11/02/2020 21:37

@Winkle2020 it's so hard. A girl in my work is pregnant just a week ahead of what I was so it's hard comparing and I'm dreading when her baby is here just because I will be comparing what should have been but I'm sure this is normal but I am happy for her too. Luckily I've moved to a different store now in a new management role so it's keeping me busy and away from it all.
I think everyone has good and bad days I find myself counting how long I should be now and what I should be doing it's hard not to 😞 xx

Original poster
Winkle2020 · 12/02/2020 11:05

@Katy0000 AF is due on 21st. You don't know how confused I am this cycle. I did not want to do ovulation test strips every day which I found very stressful (but regretting now) instead I checked on period calculator on my fertile days and I have DTD on those days and some extra days. I have not taken any extra vitamins or anything. I am very nervous and anxious

@dm14 you won't believe just this morning one of my colleagues has shared this news with me. She is 14 weeks and she was all smiling. I am very happy for her but at the same time its like a blow for me. The harder I try to come out of this the more things like these come up and make it difficult. why this has to happen to us. Don't we deserve our little angel bubbas, don't we deserve this really?

Sorry girls I am so emotional today and honestly broken. My head is everywhere. I need a break from all these daily routines and want to focus on conceiving but that's not possible.

Can we start sharing our cycle days, I kind of forgot who is in what day of your cycles

I am CD23 af due on 21st. I have not tracked ovulation so trying every other day let me know which stage are you all in

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Original poster
Winkle2020 · 12/02/2020 11:09

There are so many questions in my mind, like did I cover all my fertile days? did I do enough of BD? Should I track ovulation? should I have taken enough vitamins? should I have gone for an internal scan to make sure my uterus is ready. So many questions.

Everyone who is around me says do not overthink it....but how come...how can you be like that...? how can you all be normal when you lose your child? how can people ask me to do this

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dm14 · 12/02/2020 16:25

@Winkle2020 I feel the same I bought ovulation tests and they aren't showing a surge but still been dtd using the Flo app for fertile days.
I've been getting some light blood after sex I'm just hoping everything is ok 🙈 xx