First Pregnancy Missed Miscarriage

[sadtoday21]

Hi ladies! Our last thread was automatically closed because we reached the 1,000 post limit. I was hoping we would be able to start a new thread called First Pregnancy Post-MMC, but unfortunately we are not quite there yet. I know we will be someday soon! In the meantime, I hope you will all join me on here as we continue on this journey together. You have all been an invaluable source of inspiration, support, and kindness for me and I want to thank you for making me feel less alone in this.

About me, for any newcomers: First MMC in February at 12 weeks (baby passed at nine), D&C the next day, found out five weeks later that it was a partial molar pregnancy and currently undergoing follow-up with CX. Second early mc in April. Now impatiently waiting to be cleared from CX before ttc again.

@Catconfusion it makes me all the more grateful that I have everyone here to talk to and who truly understand. I expect I will tell more people eventually as I don't want my first pregnancy to be a secret that we never talk about. That wouldn't seem right. xx

Hi all - well, it turns out CX did rush the kit and I was able to send off another blood and urine sample this morning. Too bad it is a long weekend tomorrow - does that mean there will be no post? In any case, I won't have the results until Tuesday at the earliest, assuming the samples do not get lost this time. Oh well, just going to try to enjoy the amazing weather! Hugs to all xxx

That’s some good news @sadtoday21 no post tomorrow but there will be Saturday. Hope you can relax and enjoy the long weekend.

@sadtoday21 very glad to hear that. At least that's a better timeframe than you were looking at at one point. I hope you manage to fill your long weekend with lots of nice distractions. xx

Hey everyone - thanks for all the well wishes...still cacking my pants. Been out to buy low dose aspirin and pregnacare max today...might make no difference, but willing to give anything a try.

@AnnaMC214 - I have disrupted sleep a fair bit and thought that temping orally would be a waste of time, turns out it's not impacted my temps. Neither has alcohol. Everyone's different though.

Although your temps are a little rocky @sadtoday21, the low temp is a clear sign of the oestrogen trying to do its job and release the egg. And you had EWCM yesterday, which is also a good sign...🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻 Great news that they rushed the tests through...whoppee! Pants that there would be any post tomorrow, but Saturday they still operate.

Xxx

@Amanda81 I've never checked my cervix before but having done a bit of research on what you said it sounds like that's what's going on! Guess we'll give it a try but clearly I'm not quite back to normal yet so won't be holding out too much hope!

@sadtoday21 that's good news, fingers crossed for results on Tuesday. Hope you can enjoy your weekend and the sunshine and try and take you mind off things as much as possible. X

@3204ECL - the cervix was something I knew about before the first MC, but had never wandered up there to check it out. Apparently after an erpc, the cervix never quite shuts again, and of course after giving birth - so spotting could make a regular occurrence, but should calm down. As its brown blood, it's not really your period continuing, which is a good thing. I have found getting to know my cervix helpful around the O time, as it changes throughout the cycle, and when you are O'ing it should be soft, high and open (SHO) which is also a sign for pregnancy xx

@Amanda81 thank you so much for this it's really helpful! Much more helpful than my doctor has been and than anything I've really found online. I'm glad It seems to be quite a normal thing after a MMC and I guess we may as well give it a go! Will keep temping and using the OPKs and see what happens over the next few days! Hope you're managing to relax a little and enjoy the start of the long weekend without too much worry. Thinking of you x

@Amanda81 fingers crossed I'm the same then. I'll just have to be patient (not a strength of mine!) and wait to see if I can see any patterns. Is that really true about the cervix never really closing after an erpc?! Do you think having a coil could have a similar effect? I had much more spotting after my coil than before.

Hey @AnnaMC214 - what's a coil? 😐 I think the bottom of the cervix (the tip that you can feel) can remain in an ever so slightly open position after being opened, the top of the cervix should function as normal. When I started to check mine, I didn't have a clue what I was feeling, but over a couple of months, I started to notice the difference. I know what you mean about patience...😆😆 xx

@3204ECL - I will try to send you a link to a thread that I've been watching as some women have taken supplements to help with spotting. I would give it a bit of time before acting on anything first, but I always find that researching others experiences is much more helpful than the GP. Xx

Sorry @Amanda81 it's a contraceptive which is also known as an IUD or IUS depending on the type. It's sits inside the uterus so they have to open the cervix a little to put it in.

Ouch @AnnaMC214 - the things women do eh! Men are bloody lucky. I guess it could have a similar effect.

Hi all, I had my d&c today and finally got a chance to read over the thread. You guys are such a supportive and kind group...it is really heartwarming to read your support for one another.
@Amanda81 congrats on your bfp. That's really great and gives me so much hope. It really sucks that we can't be just joyful and delighted with every bfp cause we know too much but I hope you manage to keep the anxiety at bay.
@sadtoday21 it is absolutely rubbish about your test results. I hope you're managing to enjoy the nice weather and find some zen about a crappy situation.
@catconfusion I'm sorry that your cycle is going crazy. I know exactly how frustrating that is and am totally expecting a roller-coaster of a cycle myself now. My longest ever has been 96 days but it averages around 40. I don't have pcos (despite some initial confusion about whether I did or not) so nobody has ever given me a reason for my crazy cycles which I find so hard. I've tried all sorts of diets and detoxes but I'm not really patient enough to give any of them a go for long enough and inevitably end up going to ivf because I'm panicked about time. It gives me a lot of hope that you got pregnant naturally though. Maybe I can too...! When did you start ovusense again after your mc? I feel like starting too soon will just lead to a weeks of obsessing but I don't want to miss anything either.
@Annamc214 @bananamonkey @lmlp91 I identify so much with the pain over other people's announcements and upcoming due dates and the difficulty of trying to enjoy life despite the horrible stuff you're going through. My sister had a baby two weeks before our first due date and I've struggled so so much with that. I can barely talk to her at the moment and I feel like every comment she makes about her baby is so insensitive, which is unreasonable and a bit crazy. I guess we just do our best to get through and do what we need to do to keep ourselves sane.
Sorry for the crazy long post. I'm going to keep up now as have nothing to do for another week now except relax (and finish a 7000 word masters assignment that's due in two weeks that I haven't started 😕)

@NBparis it’s great to hear from you, I’m glad you made it through these tough days and that the d&c went as well as can be expected. I had to reread the part about your sister a few times because I can’t even imagine how difficult that must have been/still be! I wouldn’t talk to my sister much either if that happened, as horrible as it sounds. You’re not crazy at all - that is just way too tough of a situation to deal with right now. I saw a tiny tiny baby outside today and I almost broke down - and that was just a stranger’s baby! I think the smaller they are the more upset it’s makes me, because I keep picturing my own and how I would have held her like that. I feel irrationally angry still sometimes at the mum’s who parade these terribly cute babies in my face. You are definitely not alone in this xxx.

Quick question for the thread, in light of @Amanda81’s good news. What if anything will you do differently the next time around?

My first time I was very very careful and it turns out that was for nothing as it was doomed from the start due to chromosomes. I didn’t lift hard, stopped running, stopped dying my hair, changed all my makeup to natural, changed all soaps and shampoos to natural, didn’t drink any caffeine (even though I love it and we are allowed two cups a day), ate extremely healthily, took all the prenatals, and tried to work less and sleep more. Now I’m just thinking ahead and wondering if I will be more or less paranoid the next time around, knowing what I know now. Will I dye my hair in the first trimester? Keep all my usual cosmetics? Allow myself the occasional cuppa? I’m just wondering about these things so I can prepare. What do you guys think?

@NBparis I hope you are feeling a little bit better now that the wait for the d&c is over. I'm so sorry to hear about your sister. I can't imagine how hard that must be for you. Like @sadtoday21 I find it hard enough with strangers babies and I have to admit I haven't seen my heavily pregnant (with twins) friend since before the mc. How you are feeling is completely understandable.

@sadtoday21 I was the same as you and feel I did everything "right". I couldn't help feeling a bit of an idiot when I found out a good 6 weeks of that had been completely pointless. Ironically the only thing I now think could have had a negative impact was how anxious I was something would go wrong but I don't think a link between stress and mc has actually ever been proven. I felt bitterly angry at first about how little my actions had affected the outcome but I suspect I'll make all the same changes again next time anyway.

@NBparis - I hope the op went as well as can be expected and that your recovery is quick and event-free. Really sorry to hear about your struggles with your sister xx

I'm not sure I will do anything different from previous times @sadtoday21 other than take the aspirin. I'm only taking the aspirin as it was recommended by the gynaecologist as something which would cover a potential blood clotting issue...it can't harm. My DH was keen for me to take these.

How are your charts looking today @Catconfusion and @sadtoday21

How are you @AnnaMC214 @3204ECL @bananamonkey @LMLP91 @Birchwoods hope all is okay xx

Patio cleaning for me today, looking forward to getting some sunshine in my skin xx

Sorry for your loss @NBparis hope the op was ok and your recovery goes well, that must be so painful with your sister

Another day another random bleed for me...but I started temping yesterday as my Fermometer, excited!

I’m off to Manchester for my friend’s hen do, really looking forward to some time with friends as it’s been a lonely few months and just having fun/thinking about something else for a change.

Hope everyone has some nice long weekend plans? x

Morning all, Happy Bank Holiday...finally! 🎉 I'm doing okay, just making the most of my green days and enjoying dtd with DP and generally feeling brighter in myself. Although I've been suffering with a horrible headache almost every day this week which has led to me feeling extremely nauseous and worn out. I feel like I'm popping paracetamol all day which I hate, but I can't get through the day without it 👎🏼🤕 hoping this long weekend break will help to ease them.

I was wondering if any of you knew what the maximum dosage of folic acid per day is? I've googled it but seem to get getting total mixed messages about it all. I only ask as I have an antenatal/breastfeeding supplement which I'm currently taking daily which contains 400mcg of folic acid as well as Vitamins C & D. However my Mum very kindly bought me some iron tablets following my blood tests but they also contain 400mcg of folic acid. So essentially I don't want to be overdoing the folic acid if it could be detrimental to any future pregnancies, but I need to start the iron.

Should I cut my losses and buy some more plain iron with b12 tablets to be on the safe side?

Thanks all, hope you've got some lovely plans for this sunny break.

Xxx

@Amanda81 still no confirmed O, just a small rise today in attached chart. I realised if I usually O on cd19 then I should expect that to be the low temp and three high ones after that. So will see what tomorrow brings. It is a lot more erratic than last cycle, must be because of the early loss. Did you also change your cosmetics and other products for pregnancy, or am I just being paranoid about it? Also interested in the aspirin thing - do you think everyone should take that next time around, or is it just because your doctor told you to? I'm clearly really starting to think about ttc again - it's so hard to wait!!

Wishing you all a nice day off in the sunshine :).

Hi @sadtoday21 - although there are general peaks in your chart there is a general trend going down. Fingers crossed for tomorrow and they tour predictions are correct.

I didn't change any cosmetics, didn't really know about that. I did ask the midwife about hair dye and she said it was okay to go ahead as there is nothing to prove otherwise. I started going grey from the age of 20, so can't do without my hair dye 😂😂 not really sure I should be advising people to take aspirin, it's definitely a personal choice. The reason why my consultant mentioned it was due to my family history, which is where one sister had 3 MC and stopped trying for a baby and didn't have any investigations other than an ultrasound...clotting tends to run in a family, but is still very rare. The consultant had recommended that I consider getting the test done, but should leave it to see if we conceive again and take it from there. It was a considerable amount of money and I couldn't get it on the NHS until I had 3 MC's. hope you are having a good day x

Hi everyone I hope you're all enjoying the lovely weather. So pretty annoyed with this cycle. My temps have gone up a bit but I think I might be spotting. It was one of those situations where you wipe again and can't be sure. I feel a bit crappy too. It therefore might be AF after an anovulatory cycle which is pants if it is the case but at least I get to start again.

I just wondered what pre conception vitamins you're all on. I was on the wellwoman ones but switched to Fertility Plus after the surgery. The only other reason I can think of for this messed up cycle is the swap in vitamins. Also I noticed an interesting pattern. There's 9 days between each ovulation attempt. If I don't get AF again and I hear up again will be the day DH has his sperm analysis. We can't dtd for 48 hours before.

He's my messed up chart anyway! Xx

😂😂😂 crampy not crappy but actually a bit crappy too!

@sadtoday21 so glad you got the kit through. Fingers crossed for Tuesday! Xx

@Amanda81 please know we'd all feel the same so perfectly normal. You have a good mindset so I'm sure it'll sink in and you'll be fine. I had Pregnacare max too. I noticed today Superdrug do their own much cheaper version of these if it's any use. Xx

@NBparis I'm so glad your surgery is over so you can get to grips with the emotional recovery. What a horrible thing to happen after all you've been through. I'm really sorry!

I started Ovusense 3 cycles before my wedding in August last year to see what my cycles were like before we tried as I knew time wasn't on our side at 39.

My pcos is an odd one as my bloods have always been normal and cysts gone now too. It is possible to have a very slight imbalance causing it.

Do any of your female close relatives have irregular cycles? I wouldn't be surprised if some ladies have it but so mildly it's difficult to diagnose.

I completely get your impatience. Long cycles make it so difficult to ttc. Mine average at about 40 days too. I wouldn't rule it out naturally as I've heard lots of ladies conceive after IVF.

I literally fell pregnant on honeymoon because we forgot contraception. I couldn't use Ovusense properly as no internet. It was a bit of an accident but the first time we hadn't been careful. Also fell again straight after surgery but a chemical pregnancy. It felt like I was more fertile the cycle after the first loss. However the doctor told me after the fact there is more risk of chemical after surgical management. I never thought it would be so easy for me to fall pregnant but without the baby it's not much of a consolation. I can't help but think it was a fluke.

Now I'm having the cycle from hell so we can't even try. Cycles like this were however the norm in my 20s. They've generally been better as I've got older but I'm finding my mood is more sensitive to hormone changes now.

How did you find Ovusense? I love the Facebook group. Xx