First Pregnancy Missed Miscarriage

[sadtoday21]

Hi ladies! Our last thread was automatically closed because we reached the 1,000 post limit. I was hoping we would be able to start a new thread called First Pregnancy Post-MMC, but unfortunately we are not quite there yet. I know we will be someday soon! In the meantime, I hope you will all join me on here as we continue on this journey together. You have all been an invaluable source of inspiration, support, and kindness for me and I want to thank you for making me feel less alone in this.

About me, for any newcomers: First MMC in February at 12 weeks (baby passed at nine), D&C the next day, found out five weeks later that it was a partial molar pregnancy and currently undergoing follow-up with CX. Second early mc in April. Now impatiently waiting to be cleared from CX before ttc again.

Well TF for that. It's looking like I ovulated yesterday. What a marathon! Fingers crossed for another rise tomorrow to seal the deal. My tidying and nesting makes sense now. So pleased it's probably not anovulatory. 17 days to a period or you never know 14 days to a bfp. Xx

Looking good @Catconfusion - so happy that you finally have confirmation! Fingers and toes crossed for next 14-17 days. At least you and DH can relax a little now and give your hips a rest xx

@Catconfusion great news! Must be a relief, fingers crossed for the next few weeks. X

@sadtoday21 - those results are v good - all headed in the right direction!!! Hope you are able to rest and enjoy yourself on your hols.

@Catconfusion WAHEY!!!!!!!!!! That's brilliant news darling. Keeping everything crossed for you for the countdown to a BFP. Your emoji chat with DH made me laugh too - it's exactly how me and my DH would have coped with the situation.

@AnnaMC214 scream away. I still haven't seen my SIL since my MMC because she's due the day before me and she and my bro have been well meaning but keep texting things like "everything happens for a reason" and that this has happened to me because "I'm so strong and the universe knows I can cope with it". I know they're trying to help but this doesn't make me feel good, I think they are trite things to say and it just angers me. I'll join you in that screaming pillow! Thanks for all your support to me also. This thread is so lovely.

@bananamonkey how're you today? I have news - AF finally came yesterday. Started really slowly and v light which felt anticlimactic and kicked off in earnest by the end of the day (you were right @wanderlustgirl!). The only thing that makes me feel disheartened is that I've been tracking temps for the last 7 weeks and there has been no sign of O so this is an anaovulatory cycle. Still, I know that can happen and some sort of a period is better than no period I guess. It's v heavy and painful this morning.

I called the nice GP and have an appointment with him anyway but it's not for two weeks. I also called the EPU and they were nice but said not to worry unless no AF came in 2 weeks and at which point to call them back. They also said to call them when I'm pregnant again and ask for early scanning which was nice to hear. I did all that hiding out in a meeting room at work so I could speak privately on my mobile and then AF started. Typical!

How're you @3204ECL? How's meal prep this week? I had a good day yesterday but came home and ate half an Easter egg in bed. Blamed PMS!

How're things with you @Amanda81? Hope you're keeping well.

X

Thanks everyone. I've just got up and feel snuffly like I'm getting a cold. I really hope it wasn't a slight temperature causing the rise. DH has it so must have got it from him. It does match up with the peak Opk I guess so surely must be O! Tomorrow will give us a better idea as I should get another rise. I feel like I've been saying that for weeks. Fertility Friend hasn't confirmed anything yet but as you can see Ovusense put in an ovulation line and usually it's pretty accurate. Once it's confirmed on going to stop temping for my sanity I think.

Have a lovely day everyone! Xx

@Catconfusion that is great news!! You must be so relieved. It's onwards and upwards now. Thanks for your support last night xx

@sarmum14 I'm so pleased for you that af has started. I wouldn't worry about it possibly being anovulatory as I think that's quite common and not surprising after what you've been through. At least now you can start afresh. I so know what you mean about things people say being trite and annoying. It's what they resort to when they don't know what else to say and it's exactly zero comfort! I'm so glad to have you guys who truly understand xx

@AnnaMC214 I feel for you! Everyone around is pregnant at the moment despite up until not knowing anyone! It's to tough trying to be happy for everyone (even though I obv am)

Good morning everyone.

Fantastic @Catconfusion!

I don't blame you @AnnaMC214, I saw a friend at the hen do on Saturday who is 26 weeks (haven't seen her is ages and she's only a couple of weeks further along than I would have been) and had to do my best not to burst into tears.

Glad it arrived @sarmum14, hopefully a good place to start form going forward. OMG I would go crazy at "I'm so strong and the universe knows I can cope with it", I'm not coping with it!

I'm thinking I'm in the same anovulatory boat. I think I must be due AF as my skin is worse than normal, I feel fat and disgusting (greasy and spotty - nice!) and stressed/anxious which is unusual for me.

@bananamonkey it's so hard isn't it when people are a similar number of months. You did really well to hold it together. I really hope AF comes quickly and you can move onto the next cycle. I have to say I'm getting nervous now I've ovulated that my body might still not be ready. In a way I'm hoping we haven't caught in case it's another chemical. No reason to think I'm not ready but still worried.

@sarmum14 I think people try and find something positive to say when actually just acknowledging it as being completely rubbish and being there for you is all that's required. I've had everything happens for a reason and it makes me want to scream. What reason is there for this torture apart from upset and sadness!?

I follow definingmum on Instagram. She's an amazing lady who went into ovarian failure at 28 so her three kids are through IVF with donor eggs. She posted the words below and it really struck a cord with me. I've had people say it so much and it winds me up as miscarriages are not a guarantee of a live baby. I know odds are we'll all have a baby but a miscarriage is no consolation. It's a bit like saying there's plenty more fish in the sea after a bad breakup. Or stop moaning about something you can just try again.

I even had one lady on a thread on MN congratulate me on my two pregnancies even though they didn't work out. This was an odd thing to say. Anyway I'd thoroughly recommend Definingmum. Xx

Ok now I’m totally confused!

@bananamonkey what are your temps doing? It is possible to get an LH surge before your period but if your temp goes up then it's probably a late ovulation. Xx

This is it but I don’t think I can trust today’s as I forgot and had some sips of drink before doing it

@bananamonkey those seem a bit high for pre ovulation though everyone is different. It could be you did ovulate and this is a surge before AF or it will shoot up in the next couple of days and be O. It's really difficult to say. Xx

@bananamonkey do you put your temps into Fertility Friend? Xx

I have just tried, it said it can’t predict a pattern for me probably because the data is so weird and cycle so long I’m not sure anything can be reliable this month until AF arrives and I can start from scratch

@bananamonkey it's definitely worth carrying on with ff as if it is O it may pick it up eventually. I think you're right, AF would be a relief. Despite us trying I'm thinking it would be nice to get a reset. Xx

Yeah I just got a low on the digital OPK, I’m giving up trying to work it out this week!

That low you got on Saturday seems very low @bananamonkey It's so difficult to know what's going on. It must just be a WTF cycle. Not worth the stress of it. Fingers crossed for AF and a much better cycle next time! Xx

@catconfusion yay!!! I’m so happy you finally got the O rise. Everything crossed for a BFP for you soon and good test results for your DH!

@Amanda81 how’s the pregnancy going? How are you feeling? Hope all is well xxx.

@AnnaMC214 completely understand why that would upset you, it’s really hard. Have you had a bfn yet? Mine took four weeks so don’t worry it it hasn’t happened yet. 🤗

@sarmum14 congrats on AF!! That’s one major hurdle down. As others have said, it’s very common to not ovulate right after the mmc.

@bananamonkey sorry you are in limbo like me. Your pre-o temps are like mine, very high at around 36.65. I hope you see a clear pattern soon!

Well I just realised that CX said the test results were from 11 April, which is the sample I thought they lost! So there is still one from 18 April that might be negative!! Fingers crossed - going to ring back later today. Still no O for me as you can see from the messed up chart. Hugs to all!!

Thanks @sadtoday21 I feel a bit ambivalent I think because I know how stressful a bfp will be. It's the worry of it being too soon after two losses and my crazy cycle that would get to me but you never know. It's best to stay positive.

That's amazing news regarding your sample. Did they give any indication of where it was lost? I'm so pleased you will get a second test result after all. Fingers crossed its now negative! Xx

Hello Ladies.

Thanks for asking after me @sarmum14 and @sadtoday21 - all okay here, but still very early days. Good news is that I still have symptoms and have sore boobs (gets worse in the evenings) and nausea when I'm hungry. I've had cramps for the past two days which has had me all worried and got me a bit tearful yesterday. I do keep reminding myself that this is a completely new pregnancy and the worst may not happen. However, I am constantly thinking when I am going to Mc. Note to self, need to be more positive! My DH is away this weekend, so it's going to be a long old two days on my own with my own thoughts, which I am not looking forward to if I am honest.

Good to hear about you blood test results @sadtoday21 - let's us know how you get on. Xx

Yey, fricking yey for AF @sarmum14 - about time she showed up. Xx

I don't think FF will be able to confirm O yet @bananamonkey as there isn't enough data in the system for it to register. If you did O on cd27 when you had that drop, you have some nice rises after that. I think today's temp is throwing it a little as you had a couple of sips of drink. I've done that before in the early days of temping and it screwed with my chart. I would assign that temp as disregarded (you can tick a box under where you add your daily temp), which would mean that you have a dot on the chart, but no line connecting it from yesterday's temp. Xx

Great to hear you're doing ok despite the tearfulness at times @Amanda81 I had some cramping with my first pregnancy over a couple of days but it soon went and the nurse said completely normal. It does throw you though. I can imagine even more after a loss. We're all rooting for you and will be here to chat over the weekend when DH is away! Xx

@sarmum14 been good so far and getting back in the gym tonight! We had so many Easter eggs left but I made DH take them to work otherwise I know I'd have ended eating them all! So glad AF has arrived for you. X

@bananamonkey I had a similar situation with fertility friend last month, it was very confused and my temps were a bit all over the place and I'm pretty sure it got my o dates wrong but since AF things seem much better. Just waiting for a confirmed o hopefully tomorrow! Definitely worth sticking with it x

@Amanda81 glad things are going well and we'll be here over the weekend if you need to talk x

Afternoon all! Sorry I dropped off the radar after introducing myself. Life has been busy and work is quite stressful right now.

This thread moves so fast, its hard to keep up but here goes

@Amanda81 - congratulations on the BFP. That's such lovely news. Fingers crossed for you it all goes well and is as stress free as possible.

@LMLP91 I know what you mean about trying to make the most of life. I have recently gone back to climbing and kickboxing and have signed up for a half marathon because I don't know what will happen and I don't want to stop living 'just in case' I get a BFP. It feels nice and actually quite liberating

@NBparis, I have been struggling a bit with people, including both sets of parents talking about first christenings and DH's niece asking 'where our baby is'?!?! None of them are aware of our MMC.
I also have a friend who is expecting twins three days before my due date. I am so happy for her but it came out of the blue because she hates pregnancy and was adamant she wasn't going to have another.

@Sadtoday21, I can't believe you had such trouble getting your test results through! As if all this isn't hard enough. It doesn't fill me with hope. Sorry if I missed it but have you had them back yet?

@AnnaMc214, I still had a BFP four weeks after ERPC, a fainter one maybe five weeks later and a negative at about week seven so its frustrating but it can just take time. I was spotting for three weeks after the procedure and had been very close to calling the unit for advice but it stopped on the day I was going to call so I left it.

My current concern is that I am on CD63 now and still no sign of AF other than dark brown, very light spotting when Natural Cycles said AF was due around CD56 to CD59. As @Sarmum14 mum had previously raised before her AF came, I am concerned about Asherman's syndrome. I have to wake up at 6am tomorrow to call my GP and try to get an appointment. I'm trying to make sure I know what to ask as I really don't want to waste time being fobbed off.

I also agree that it has been harder to lose weight since the ERPC and I have been working out a reasonable amount. Need to up my running though as I have a 10k coming up!

Chart attached in case anyone has any thoughts. I still don't understand it and am keeping a record in case its useful to my GP.

Hi everyone, My sister just told me she is pregnant. She is 42. This is her 6th pregnancy. She has two kids (9 and 7) and has had 3 miscarriages in the past year and a half. I am...I don't even know how I feel. I know she is sure she is going to miscarry again and that the stats aren't good for her. She hasn't told anyone and isn't planning to. Somehow, even though I know she is not in a good place, I still feel so envious of her that she can get pregnant so so easily. She's been pregnant three times naturally in the past year and a half, without even trying, whereas I have been trying for four years now and have never been pregnant naturally, even though I know perfectly well that getting pregnant isn't enviable unless it results in a healthy baby. Anyway, it's all just very confusing and making my head melt a little. I have two incredibly fertile sisters (the other one has a baby that is two weeks older than mine would have been if we hadn't had a mc) and here I am, not able to either get pregnant or stay pregnant.

@catconfusion, I'm so glad you ovulated! I have everything crossed for you to get a bfp in two weeks.
@sarmum14 & @zoomies1 nice to 'meet' you. I hope @sarmum14 you are feeling a bit better after everything. I know that feeling of being so unlucky that you are apprehensive of what will happen next. Last August, I found out about our mmc on the day before my sister's wedding. Then our house was broken into two weeks later and lots of stuff stolen. And then, just when everyone was saying nothing bad else would happen, I broke my elbow and had to take three weeks' unpaid leave. And now we're back with another mc. Never again will I believe someone who says it's our time for good luck and nothing else bad could possibly happen!!

Anyway, I really hope AS is not relevant for either of you but I know how worrisome the idea is. I googled it a lot after my d&c too but I was reassured by how rare it is so I hope you can get confirmation soon that it is nothing to do with you.

@Amanda81 It must be so hard to be pregnant after loss. The anxiety must be so hard to control but it sounds like you are doing a great job of taking it day by day. Everyone has said to me after two mc that the chances of taking home a healthy baby are still so much higher than another mc so I try to focus on that to keep me sane at moments of panic.
@sadtoday21 @zoomies1 I am a bit saddened that you guys are still getting positive tests so long after the ERPC. I have a follow up consultation with the fertility clinic in six weeks and I am praying that my cycles might play ball so that we can plan our next move then. If it takes that length of time to even get a negative test, that is going to delay things even further.