Please or to access all these features

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

What happens when a pregnancy has ended but miscarriage is yet to happen?

266 replies

MrsBobDylan · 01/12/2016 22:02

Hi, am 8 weeks but a scan has shown that heartbeat is just a flicker and measurements are way out for the number of weeks. I have a scan on Monday and expect to find the pregnancy is finished.

However, all the pregnancy symptoms are still there so think I will need some kind of medical help to end it.

Would anyone mind sharing what my options would be and how it might work please?

I thought all would be ok at my last scan but now I know it's not I just want to prepare for the next stage. Thanks in advance.

OP posts:
Littlemisssugarplum88 · 21/12/2016 09:35

I'm just waiting my scan scan at epu why, thanks for asking. The cramping is more controlled with the pain killers but when I blow my nose I get a sharp pain right down low behind my pubic bone. I'm convinced something is stuck, I guess I'll find out soon enough.

Hope everyone else is ok today xxx

whyistherumgone · 21/12/2016 10:24

Sad Keep us updated. I hope everything is OK and the pain goes soon.
It's a terrible thing to go through whatever the time of year but just seems even worse at Christmas.

Nothing happening here still, I'm thinking I will probably need medical help as I've not had any bleeding not even spotting since the bleed last week that sent me to EPU.

Hope everyone else is OK today.

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 21/12/2016 10:44

I've had the scan. I was feeling so nervous and uncomfortable because it was the same room we had the last scan and were told our bad news and felt like we were going to be told more bad news :/ (as daft as that sounds). Anyway the scan went ok, she said the lining still look quite thick so it's probably fluid or blood clots, but she's sure if it doesn't come away naturally that my period will bring it away, so I'm definitely going to wait until after my period before I start TTC. I was worried I'd need more medical management or have to go to theatre so I'm quite pleased with the outcome.
Just treating ourselves to breakfast in Bella Italia BrewStarthen going to do a little Xmas shopping. Haven't even had chance to put the tree up yet with all what's happened so I think that'll be a job for today Xmas Smilexxx

BeamReach · 21/12/2016 10:59

Glad you need no more intervention little....

Hugs to everyone else. I am going to do some work from home today. Git a few tiny bits of paperwork to do. That will make me feel less useless I hope.....

whyistherumgone · 21/12/2016 11:39

Ah little I'm pleased you don't have to have any more medical management. Enjoy your breakfast and Christmas shopping.

Beam I think staying busy or trying to is key, I've decided to sort out the house properly as I've been walking around in a daze for the last four days!

GreedyDuck · 21/12/2016 11:41

I'm lying in a hospital bed, gowned up, bed pad down, cannula in, just waiting for my MVA. Scan yesterday showed that there wasn't much left to go, but they said they'd go ahead anyway so that hopefully I won't be bleeding on and off all over Christmas. Should be a pretty swift procedure.

I hope that everyone else manages to have an ok Christmas and new year, thank you for making me feel not as alone during this horrible time. love and hopefully bfps for all in the new year. X

whyistherumgone · 21/12/2016 12:15

Hello Greedy good luck hope it all goes smoothly for you x

Hulaballoo · 21/12/2016 13:26

Thinking of you greedy, I hope it all goes well. Stay strong, at least it'll be before Christmas andb then you can takeb the time to heal. Big hugs, let us know how it goes xxx

BeamReach · 21/12/2016 20:59

How did it go Greedy? Sending you healing thoughts.

whyhastherumgone · 22/12/2016 12:13

Hope it went ok Greedy

GreedyDuck · 22/12/2016 12:32

Thank you all.

It was pretty unpleasant, but made bearable by the amazing team at the Whittington EPU. I think I'd had selective memory loss regarding how uncomfortable the procedure is under LA, and if I go through this again I may opt for a GA.

The consultant was extremely reassuring throughout though and would have stopped at any point if I absolutely needed her to. Two wonderful nurses held my hands and chatted/distracted me throughout. She did say that there was a little bit of tissue still in there, but I didn't want her to go back in once she'd stopped and she said it should pass naturally. I have to go back if I'm still bleeding in a fortnight.

I didn't ask dp to come this time, as I know he found it very hard last time, but in retrospect I do wish I'd had him there.

Although painful, it was over very quickly, and I was ready to leave 40 minutes later and went straight to Waitrose to do some shopping, no real pain since, just a little tender. I've been to IKEA this morning and am just about to make some mince pies and wrap dd's presents.

The lowest point was having to listen to a very young woman in her first trimester vomiting endlessly in the next cubicle whilst I waited for my cervix to soften up. Listening to her whimpering and moaning to her bf about needing pain relief and not being able to cope tested my patience rather (I am a terrible human being).

Anyway, onwards and upwards. We will try again, but I am realistic about our chances of another successful pregnancy, given my age. I don't think I can go through this more than once or twice more, so praying for a sticky bean next time as I desperately want my DD to have a sibling. I know how incredibly fortunate we are to have her though, so am trying to focus on the positives.

whyhastherumgone · 22/12/2016 13:11

Greedy I will keep absolutely everything crossed for you that you get lucky next year. Wishing you all the luck and sticky bean vibes.
I'm glad the procedure went as well as it could - I do think it's a shame that there isn't a separate area for waiting so you can avoid that kind of thing but I guess they only have what space they have - just always seems a bit insensitive.

Got my scan tomorrow so I'm hoping for a definitive answer so I can properly accept it and start to move on.

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 22/12/2016 13:24

I will be thinking of you tomorrow rum.
I'm glad your procedure is all over and done with greedy - hope you have a speedy recovery.

I'm so cold today, the heating is on full blast but I just can't get warm :( xx

BeamReach · 22/12/2016 16:05

Sorry that sounded so hellish Greedy.... But glad it is all over with minimal physical pain afterward

I am back home after my surgery. They were lovely. Apart from the health care assistant clearly didn't know why I was in and was inappropriately jolly (and male).... Hardly his fault. Nurses and Drs were great though.

Wept a bit before and after, feel better emotionally for having it over. I am sure there is plenty coming to kick me in the ass.

In some ongoing pain. Codydramol has done little for it so will open wine once it has worn off....

Little, can you take your temperature (and worried if you feel cold that you have an infection/ fever)..... Take good care of yourselves ladies. It really has been a life saver having this.....

Hulaballoo · 22/12/2016 16:50

You're so brave greedy, it takes some guts to have the LA, I really don't think I could have done that. wishing you lots of positive vibes for a sticky bean next year 😀
Hope you're ok little, check your temp if you can. Maybe it's a cold or flu, immune system may be down too... Hope you feel better soon.

Good luck with your scan tomorrow rum, I'll get the day right this time, twinkling of you.
I'm away tomorrow night for a night, e worked things will start naturally before my erpc next week.
Were there any tell tale signs before any of you started bleeding, if you did start bleeding.... Can they still do an erpc if you're bleeding? Feeling a bit low... Not sure if I've passed it being 37 with 2 gorgeous girls and not sure about trying again... Lots to ponder. Hugs to all xx

whyhastherumgone · 22/12/2016 17:09

Thanks hula
I really don't think you're passed it - I know it's easy for others to say but I have three friends who are 39+ all expecting their second. I also know women in their early twenties who experienced MMC or MC too so although I know there are more risks as you get older, what we're going through isn't age specific alone. Obviously everyone's situation is different and I don't know your circumstances etc so would never assume but I wouldn't give up hope. Hope nobody takes this offensively as everyone's circumstances are obviously unique and I hate it when people just pop on and saying "oh you'll be absolutely fine next time!" when actually that may not be the case to everyone, but I would err on the side of positivity for the new year Hula once you've given yourself time to recover both physically and mentally xx

i haven't started bleeding yet - haven't had anything since the initial bleed that sent me to EPU in the first place, so an interested in your question to others.

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 22/12/2016 17:10

It must be horrible waiting Hula Sad I didn't bleed or anything and I chose medical management the day after I found out I'd had a mmc so mine was kind of straight forward. I didn't have to have repeat scans or anything either as I'd had a scan 4 weeks earlier which had a heartbeat and it was similar size so I knew there and then I'd miscarried. The only thing I did have was brown mucous the day before I found out but I'm not sure whether many other people had the same too.
My face is now burning up and I feel so tired (I'm sick of moaning now lol) and I can't find my thermometer either xx

GreedyDuck · 22/12/2016 17:22

Hula, you are most definitely not past it! My nct group ranged from 35-44 in age, and at the hospital they always scoffed at me when I said I was old having a baby at 40. 40 something new mums seem pretty usual round here, so I'd say you have a way to go.

I had been bleeding, lightly, since Sunday and had assumed they wouldn't do the MVA, but if you already have the slot and they can see there is still tissue left I would think that they would still do it. The only warning signs I had before I passed the sac was minor lower back cramps and just feeling a bit period-y.

Glad your surgery went ok Beam, keep on top of the pain relief and be kind to yourself.

Will be thinking of you tomorrow rum.

Can you get checked out little, hopefully it's nothing, but worth checking that you don't have an infection.

BeamReach · 22/12/2016 17:24

Little, I think you need to see the dr Today.

Call your GP now. They may send you to the out of hours dr but get seen today please (not to be construed as medical advice on the internet but I can't sit here and
say nothing)

Phone your Early pregnancy unit or the ward if you can't get to the GP

whyhastherumgone · 22/12/2016 17:25

if you feel feverish little you should get yourself checked out just to be on the safe side :-/
Let us know how you are/how you get on xx

BeamReach · 22/12/2016 17:28

Hula...Yes they can still do the ercp if you are bleeding (but will scan you first if you think you might have passed a lot)

I was bleeding off and on (period type no clots) and they did my procedure today.

I hope you have a peaceful time (can you ask your dr to prescribe you some strong pain relief as it can be tricky to access it over the holidays

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 22/12/2016 18:29

When I went for the scan yesterday they did take a swab but I'm not sure how long it'll take to come back. I don't really feel feverish, I think my body is just knackered after a rough week. I'll keep you all posted xx

BeamReach · 22/12/2016 19:52

Little... I have sent you a PM

Don't want to worry you and sure you can trust your instincts but you don't need to wait for swabs to come back (they won't before Xmas)...

BeamReach · 22/12/2016 20:53

I feel so much better physically this evening. I was really ailing over last few days.

That may just be the glass of wine I have had to taking the edge off emotionally. I am so grateful to the surgeon and team (hormones I am sure)....

Thinking of you for tommorrow Hula...

Xx

whyhastherumgone · 22/12/2016 21:20

Glad to hear you are feeling a little better beam

Might be TMI but I just went to the loo and noticed a stringy bit of mucus in the toilet bowl with a tiny bit of brown in it so I think things might be starting naturally - nice timing body, thanks! At least that's extinguished the tiny bit of hope I had for tomorrow's scan.
Do you think I should still go tomorrow even if I start bleeding?