What happens when a pregnancy has ended but miscarriage is yet to happen?

[MrsBobDylan]

Hi, am 8 weeks but a scan has shown that heartbeat is just a flicker and measurements are way out for the number of weeks. I have a scan on Monday and expect to find the pregnancy is finished.

However, all the pregnancy symptoms are still there so think I will need some kind of medical help to end it.

Would anyone mind sharing what my options would be and how it might work please?

I thought all would be ok at my last scan but now I know it's not I just want to prepare for the next stage. Thanks in advance.

How are you getting on mrsbob?

So sorry for your losses mistletoe and wibble. It's just heartbreaking.

I'm back at work today. Physical side effects of the surgery have been minimal - small amount of bleeding and I can probably swap to a liner rather than pads, although I am a bit paranoid I might then get caught out. Pregnancy symptoms are still taunting me - sore boobs, strong sense of smell and nasal drip are lingering. Still look like I have a bit of a gut too as my belly is slowly going back to normal.

For those a bit further on, how long did it take to get a negative pregnancy test? It seems pretty unlikely that I would get pregnant naturally after 4 years TTC and IVF to get this far, but I think I'll have to give myself a 3 month break before doing another cycle.

Hi MrsBob. I am sadly joining you from the July2017 thread. Had a viability scan today at what should be 8+3, but embryo only measuring 4mm and barely pulsating as opposed to having a hb. Being scanned again in ten days but not hopeful.

Did you have your scan yesterday?

I had a mmc picked up at 8 weeks a couple of years ago and opted for an ERPC under local anaesthetic. I needed it to be over and my body was showing no signs of miscarrying naturally. I'm even more scared of miscarrying now as I have a toddler at home, so will probably opt for another ERPC.

Oly5
I had a MMC at 13 weeks back in the summer- we didn't specifically "wait" for a first period.

As soon as the bleeding stopped (over 3 weeks after the initial bleeding started!) we started having sex again.

It doesn't matter all that much in terms of dating the pregnancy- they'll do that at the dating scan.

I guess it's more to recover emotionally, physically etc

We also didn't wait as I was already 38 at the time of the MMC.
Really do not have time to waste!

Oh greedy so sorry to see you here, I was on the July 2017 thread as well.
Please look after yourself. I opted for the tablets, not sure if they have worked am in for a scan in the morning to check. I wanted it to be over and to know when it was gonna happen but no way could I face surgery.
All the best.

Thanks Miami, I was sorry to see that you were in the same boat. I hope it's all worked ok and maybe we'all bump into each other on another antenatal thread sometime, fingers crossed. Take care.

Sorry to hear your news Greedy that must have been awful to hear. It's all so sad isn't it?

Miami hope your scan showed it has passed? I opted for the tablets and yesterday took the pessaries. Like a pp I was quite surprised at the 3 hours where I spent alot of time howling...it was a bit painful and as someone who's had 3 elective c-sections, I felt a bit of a wimp really.

I'm not sure I've passed enough, but the epu said they'd call today so I'll run it past them I guess.

Tigerdog my dh asked what he could do to help me yesterday and I said 'get me a time machine so I can choose surgery instead of this!'. It did improve though thank God! I was told it might take 1-2 weeks after the miscarriage is complete to get a negative test.

MrsBobDylan

So sorry to hear you're going through this.

I had a MMC in the summer, was just 13 weeks & I started bleeding on the day of my dating scan

Baby had stopped developing around 8 weeks so it was a long time before I had any signs.

My uterus continued to grow, I had all the pregnancy symptoms etc.
MMC is so very cruel.

With hindsight I'd rather that I'd had a spontaneous miscarriage at 8 weeks rather than believe I was in the 2nd trimester & getting excited about telling close family.

I went for medical management which took a long time- around 10 days for the actual miscarriage to happen (the day I was meant to be back at work!).

Luckily I didn't have it done in hospital & could be at home, otherwise I'm sure I would've be told I needed the surgery, which I really wasn't keen on.

Now on cycle 5 TTC & nothing happening so far. Even more depressing is that my baby should have been with us around now

On thing I'll say is that it's definitely not "just like a period"
It sounds like you've gone through the process yesterday.

Wishing you well

Oh mrsbob I had to take the tablets again yesterday. So I was with you in the agony. It was very different to Friday, I almost passed out in the car in the twenty mins it took to get home from the hospital. Loads of clots, waves of pain, but again no massive relief of pain like I had last time when I knew I had definitely passed the sac. Will just wait and see. Bit crampy today but ok. Still going to be sleeping on 3 towels with a binnag underneath in case it all kicks off again.
Hope you are ok.

Turquoise
I had the tablets in April for my first Mmc. It took us 6 months to get pg again, don't lose hope. I felt that my cycles were a bit off after the first Mmc and for that reason went to acupuncture.
Tmi but I genuinely had never seen as much ewcm in all my days as I did the first cycle with acupuncture. We got pregnant that cycle, unfortunately it has ended in mc again but as I keep telling myself, I did get pregnant, now we need to figure out how to get into the next bit.
You poor dear - feeling like you were over the worst of it. What an absolute kick in the chops.
I kind of know what you mean, there is a part of me that is glad that if this one did have to end (which I was really hoping it wouldn't) I am ok with it having happened at 8/9 weeks at home here in my own house, rather than at 12 weeks in my parents house over Christmas.

*binbag
What on earth is a binnag?

I'm so sorry MrsBob, Miami and Turquoise, this sucks. I went to my local hospital's EPU for another scan on Wednesday, just to get me in the system so that I can hopefully get it all sorted out before Christmas.

Weirdly, they found a hb, and my scan report says 'viable pregnancy 6+ weeks', they also measured the embryo as slightly larger than the private scan, but still way too small.

The thing is, I am certain of my dates and when I ovulated as I was testing, so I know that this poor little embryo is two weeks behind, at least, and am just waiting to miscarry either spontaneously or be told no hb next week. Dreading it dragging out over Christmas as we'll be in France with family.

I should be at my booking in appointment right about now.

Turquoise, I didn't conceive my daughter until the month after my first baby would have been born. Although it seemed to take forever to conceive again, I almost feel as though my emotions were suppressing my fertility* and once I'd passed my due date I was able to let that baby/pregnancy go a bit, and hey presto, conceived a few weeks later during my 40th birthday celebrations. I hope that you get your bfp soon.

*I'm not a hippy but I do think the mind/body link, esp with regards to fertility, is a mysterious thing.

Oh greedy
That is so hard. Did the epu give you a rundown of what the chances are? You sound pretty certain in yourself so it is odd that someone has written viable. I really hope that it resolves itself soon, I know that the limbo is really really hard.
They went through the exact dates with me, I would have had to conceive after already having BFP as mine was also measuring 2 weeks behind. I was reassured by that in that I understand that just isn't possible. But that doesn't stop you clinging onto any story you can find of this having worked out ok for someone. My thoughts are with you.

GreedyDuck

Sorry to hear what has been happening to you & hope that you know more what is happening esp before the Christmas holidays kick in.

Thank you for sharing your experiences- I think you are right re the mind/body having an impact on fertility.

Both my previous pregnancies we only had sex the one time in the month that I conceived.

Also despite me recently stopping the pill we weren't "actively" TTC
So pregnancy wasn't really on the horizon and each time I had a sudden "unexpected" pregnancy.

Had always thought it would take ages each time as I was almost 35 with the first, had taken hormonal contraception for almost a decade etc

The last few months have been weird as were are actively TTC- have been doing BBT & OPKs, trying to figure out when I ovulate, are we free to have sex/in the same place etc!

So I suppose it's stressful compared with what I experienced before. It is so disappointing getting your period...I know what other friends have been going through, I know a few who have TTC for years/had IVF.

I guess maybe I probably caused them some heartache with my accidental pregnancies/doing all the things you shouldn't do in first trimester etc.

Plus I know I have a rising internal panic that I'm running out of time.

With pregnancy no 2 earlier on this year, I did have a strong feeling of relief that I'd have a 2nd baby at the age of 38 and felt happy & v lucky about this...but obviously that didn't work out.

Baby would have been born by now so I'm hoping this clears out my emotions etc and I can get pregnant again!

For this cycle I've ditched the BBTs & only did 2 opks- one positive on day 17- have tried not to look at Ovia or count days or anything, think I'm on CD23 ish.

Good luck to everyone!

Hi, im sorry to hear about your losses, esp at this time of year!

Personally, 2016 has been a bad year in general for various reasons and so it is quite fitting that it ends with me miscarrying
I have every expectation that 2017 will be better, as it cant be worse!

I started bleeding on Wednesday night at 5w5d so went to docs on Thursday morning who referred me to the EPU at Stafford hospital with an appt on the Friday (6wks pregnant) the scan was inconclusive as the foetus was there but showing 3-4wks. They suspect, as do i, that i am miscarrying but the sack has just not left yet. I am booked in again for another scan next Thursday to confirm one way or another. Im am still bleeding and have no pregnancy symptoms so I'm prepared for the worst outcome. If the sack is still there on Thursday but shows no sign of growth then i will have surgery to have it removed on the Friday.

I never realised a miscarriage could be a long process, i always thought it happened quickly/ suddenly.

C x

Yy to the long process...epu rang yesterday and said that I should test for a negative result on the 30th Dec. I don't think I've really bled that much but I've done 5 days so far and other than the first day where it was all active, bloody painful and had me howling, it's been like the first day of a period, every day.

I'm ready to ditch the big pants and pads - I want to be free!!

Sorry to all those who are still going through it and hope your waiting ends soon greedy. The waiting is terrible...

Mrsbob
I keep thinking that I am done with the bleeding and that it is leaving off a bit, and then it all builds up again. Still sleeping on a towel and sitting on a plastic bag. Wanted to get back to work tomorrow but seriously if I feel like this I don't know if I can. This is taking such a long time.

I'm really sorry it's dragging out for you Charley (and Miami and MrsBob). It feels especially tough at this time of year.

I just feel resigned to it all now. I wonder if it will hit me properly once it's all over.

I do feel so amazingly fortunate to have my daughter, I had pretty much given up hope by the time I conceived her. I am sad that this one is not meant to be, but I am still counting my blessings.

I also survived our NCT group joint 2nd birthday party yesterday, where two of the other four mums are pregnant again. They have all been so lovely, but I was dreading it beforehand, and I don't have much in the way of small talk at the mo.

Just want to share my story and I hope it helps others
I've had 2 miscarriages first being at 6 weeks with a natural miscarriage and the second at 8 weeks and 5 days.
With my second pregnancy I had an early reassurance scan at 5 weeks and surprisingly we could see a little heartbeat at 8 weeks I went for a second reassurance scan and baby was measuring at 8 weeks and 5 days but unfortunately there was no longer a heartbeat :( this was a heartbreaking moment for us as I had no signs or bleeding. Even though I was petrified of having an op I decided to have a D and C as I couldn't deal with the emotions of seeing all the blood and possibly our baby again. I had my op this morning and I'm surprised with how great I physically feel! I'm in less pain than I thought I would be and there is little blood which I think will help me heal emotionally.
I hope this helps others that are in the situation that I was in and not to be afraid of having a D and C if you think it will help on the emotional side of things.

Hope all are doing ok. I seem to be making gradual progress to 'not pregnant' as this morning's test was much fainter than a week ago (and I'm now 2 weeks post ERPC). Am hoping it'll be negative in a week or so, then hopefully it won't take too long for my cycle to settle. Back on the IVF bandwagon in January, as very little chance of a natural conception after 4 years ttc...

Another July thread member here, MMC too i think, thought i had started to miscarry after a pale pink bit of spotting yesterday morning but nothing since. Started a thread then as missed this one. Hate this limbo - my follow up scan to confirm no growth is on the 23rd and i want a ERPC as i cannot face MC at home with a 14 month old and staying at the in-laws from the 24-28th.

At this rate on the scan they will declare i am having a chocolate bar baby.. mainlining the stuff in my low mood.

Finding the lack of info from the EPU rubbish. My scan last fri said unknown viability ( 5 weeks si vs my dates of 8-9 weeks) and a see you in two weeks, no mention of MC until i returned in tears yesterday, no scan just a hug , tissues, get paracetamol and go home.. for 2 weeks?!!! i have a job!
to all those also going through this hell and who have been previously.

Hi ladies (greedy and Mrs Bob especially).... I am joining you in the hideous uncertainty and despond bus.. Sorry to be meeting you both here....

Went for a private viability scan yesterday..... Empty sac measuring 6+3 (should be between 7+5 and 8 +2 ish).

No bleeding, nothing happening except tummy pain I suspect is caused by constipation.

Also sore sore throat and a cold.

My colleague just posted pics of his beautiful daughter born yesterday just as I was getting my news.

My parents are both here with me (not sure I can bear us all hanging about in misery.... But DP lives at some distance , was here yesterday.... Now feeling hideously sad on his own ).....

Have a second scan booked for confirmation next Tuesday. Christmas is looking very grim

We cross posted, Stress - hugs to you xx

I have just said to work I won't be back in til new year. I think my chances of an ercp before the Xmas break are slim to none, but you never know.

Work have been fine (I am medical- could not cope with seeing patients).... I am at home, I have some paperwork to do remotely and a course to prep. Thinking if things to distract me.....

Waves at Beam in solidarity.
I am working from home .. shipped DC1 to the childminder. About to have a Conf call with my CEO to present a report i have spent 2 months on, good to be distracted.

I just do not want to miscarry at my in laws with 15 other people milling around, selfish of me according to DH to 'spoil Xmas' he got sent ot work with a flea in his ear, simply cannot get his head round how awful this wait is.

Yeah. Mum my suggested I come home to their house (2 hours drive away) and back again for my epau appointment (2 hours each way).

I am pondering showing her the pinned miscarriage advice thread so ahe understand quite what she is asking me.... Perhaps your DP may find that educating too.

I am a bit scared. My scan showed a lot of fibroids which I guess explained why my periods have been hideously painful recently (theoretically I am clinging to only be misscarrying at 6+3 abs thematises of the not too bD experiences

Bad bit bD