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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Original poster

What happens when a pregnancy has ended but miscarriage is yet to happen?

266 replies

MrsBobDylan · 01/12/2016 22:02

Hi, am 8 weeks but a scan has shown that heartbeat is just a flicker and measurements are way out for the number of weeks. I have a scan on Monday and expect to find the pregnancy is finished.

However, all the pregnancy symptoms are still there so think I will need some kind of medical help to end it.

Would anyone mind sharing what my options would be and how it might work please?

I thought all would be ok at my last scan but now I know it's not I just want to prepare for the next stage. Thanks in advance.

OP posts:
Stuckinstressville · 15/12/2016 16:42

Oh little how scary and heartbreaking, sorry for your loss. Flowers

BeamReach · 15/12/2016 16:43

So sorry, both of you.... I am glad you both "have plans" though. Recovery starts from there.

I called up EPAU and made a tit of myself weeping on the phone. Nurse there took a while to understand what I was saying/asking and tried to reassure me that all was not lost. Which is fair enough as she doesn't have my scan result in front of her..... She did tell me that all was not lost regarding getting an ercp before xmas ( scan on Tuesday).....so there is that

🌷🌷🌷🌷 to everyone xx

Stuckinstressville · 15/12/2016 16:43

little mine is a mmc too with no bleeding at all yet... am 9 weeks date wise and looks like it stopped at 6.
It is awful waiting, but lots of hand holding here.

BeamReach · 15/12/2016 16:48

Hi [bold]littlemiss[\bold] I am sorry your news was not better.... What did they say to you at the early pregnancy unit? Did they offer you a follow up scan? Xx

charlotteP1994 · 15/12/2016 16:50

Mine is also a mmc, I had no bleeding or and signs of this, I still felt pregnant.
Sorry for everyone's losses Flowers

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 15/12/2016 16:56

They just explained my options, whether I want to go to theatre or let nature take its course. I had an early scan at 6+6 as I was under a fertility nurse and there was a heartbeat then but the nurse today said it looks as though the heart had stopped beating not long after the scan.
I just feel completely broken. My eyes are stinging from crying and my head is pounding from the stress of it all.
It was only yesterday morning we were talking about names and having our first Christmas next year together as our own little family and now it has all been taken away from us.
You never really understand just how hard and distressing this is for those involved until you experience it yourself :( xxx

charlotteP1994 · 15/12/2016 17:03

So sorry for your loss little, have you thought about which option you'd like to take? I've experienced natural mc and surgery so if you'd like any info or advice just ask Smile Flowers

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 15/12/2016 17:07

I'm thinking of asking for the medication to take. I don't particularly want to go to theatre if I can help it and the foetus died around 3 weeks ago and not sure how much longer it might take?! I just presumed every miscarriage would shortly end in bleeding (how wrong was I) but I've still got no symptoms to complain about so I have no idea what to expect next xx

charlotteP1994 · 15/12/2016 17:13

For my first I had a natural mc at 6 weeks and I'm not going to lie there was a lot of blood and pain. My second was 8 weeks and 5 days, I was going to have the tablets as I had no symptoms but couldn't face the risk of seeing my baby. I decided to have the surgery which I had on Monday, I'm still bleeding now but there is very little blood. It is the hardest decision deciding what to do xxx

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 15/12/2016 17:45

I'm sorry that you have had to experience this horrible nightmare more than once. I can't imagine how it must be a second time around. Sending you lots of gentle hugs xxx

AppleMagic · 15/12/2016 17:52

GreedyDuck I had a very similar miscarriage just over a year ago now. I remember how hard the wait was knowing that my dates couldn't possibly be THAT out. Flowers

I opted for medical management at home as was told a two week wait for a d&c and wanted some control over the timing. I put the kids to bed at 7 and took the first tablet. I took the second tablet before going to bed with some painkillers. At 3am I woke and passed everything. I was lucky in that aside from about 30 seconds it really was no different to a period for me. I don't know if it was easier because I've had two vaginal deliveries previously.

I got pregnant again three months later (first month my cycles were back to normal and first month we tried again) and now have a 4 week old.

AppleMagic · 15/12/2016 17:54

I meant to add that I was 10/11 weeks pregnant and baby measured 8 weeks at my final scan (although this was due to slow growth as I'd had a private scan two days earlier which showed a heartbeat).

charlotteP1994 · 15/12/2016 17:58

Congratulations :)
This may sound like a silly question but how will I know when my period starts? As some women stop and start bleeding after a mc and my cycles have never been normal?

BeamReach · 15/12/2016 18:50

Charlotte, have you thought about tracking your cycles? It involves taking your temp each morning and following cervical mucus (not for everyone).... It usually gave me a pretty clear idea of what was going on (temp rises at point of ovulation then drops off on day period due to start)... There are books and websites about it

Appreciate that may well be too much to cope with in aftermath of misscarriage x

charlotteP1994 · 15/12/2016 18:56

Thanks for the info beam, I will try this :) some months I don't get my period, I know this isn't normal, is there anything I can do? X

BeamReach · 15/12/2016 19:32

Hi Charlotte, I would probably have a chat with your GP, it can be normal for you or there might be something else happening, not usually anything worrying but it can be helpful to know why it happens ....

charlotteP1994 · 15/12/2016 19:43

I spoke to my GP as I didn't have a period for 6 months, they did lots of blood tests (full mot apparently) and everything came back fine. All I know is that I have an irregular shaped uterus but don't think this would affect my periods?

GreedyDuck · 15/12/2016 20:06

Sorry for your loss too little. I have had no cramping or bleeding this time, and I didn't last time either. I should be ten weeks on Saturday, but was measuring about 6 weeks a week ago and the hb has obviously stopped in the last few days.

I am opting for an MVA, although if they had only had slots for an ERPC under GA I would have been ok with that too. I know what to expect, and although it's not pleasant, it doesn't take very long and they scan throughout so there is very little risk of anything being left behind. My biggest fear with letting things take their course, or medical management, is retained products, it dragging on, and then having to have an MVA. I was told today that they wouldn't let me have medical management anyway as I've had a caesarean.

Last time I bleed very little afterwards, and actually went to a festival (and camped for two nights) four days later. It was a relief to get the physical side sorted out and then deal with the emotional fallout at my own speed. I think I had a week off of work post procedure.

Thanks for sharing your experience too Apple, does sound very similar. Congratulations on your new arrival.

user1481800358 · 16/12/2016 11:20

It's so sad reading through these messages and seeing what everyone has or is going through...especially so close to Christmas when everyone seems to be so happy and excited.

Yesterday I posted on another thread that I believe I am currently miscarrying. I am nearly 6 weeks but started to bleed (brown/pink) on and off at the beginning of the week and had such an uncomfortable pain in my lower back. On Wednesday I went to the EPU and they scanned and said I had an irregular gest sac and that it was likely I was miscarrying or would be - my follow up scan is a week today...2 days before Christmas :(. Has anyone else been told this when they went for their scan?

The last day I have passed a light pink, with what I can describe as pink bits in which I am convinced is the baby and my back pain is horrific. It's horrible being in the unknown and it is my 1st pregnancy...now I am scared that it will happen again :(.

The nurse in EPU wasn't very good and I could barely read her notes. I did notice yesterday (on the copy she gave me) that it said I had free fluid on my POD which she didn't even mention. Has anyone had this and do you know what it means please?

I am sorry for all the questions but feel like, having read all of the comments, only you ladies understand the situation xxxx

Stuckinstressville · 16/12/2016 11:23

So saw the consultant at 10 and erpc booked for 12. Private healthcare.

He trusted my nhs scan then the private one I had a week later. Said the sac looked empty from the pics and he was confident.

Wish me luck.
How are you all today?

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 16/12/2016 11:40

This is all very new to me so I can't really offer much advice but I do wish that you lovely ladies have a speedy and non-painful recovery.

I am just about to go back to the hospital to collect the medication to begin the process. The heartbeat stopped around 3-4 weeks ago so I don't really want to leave it too much longer.

We are still receiving Xmas cards from close family addressed to us and bump. Will this ever get any easier?! I dread logging into Facebook because every time I do there are scan pictures of babies dressed up in elf or Santa suits; and here we are experiencing this horrible nightmare :(

Xxx

GreedyDuck · 16/12/2016 12:14

Good luck Stuck, I should have used my private healthcare really, the next four days of waiting are going to be hideous.

I am a mess and not in work, don't expect to be now until January, I just can't cope. I am so sad and tired.

It will get easier LittleMiss, it just takes time I'm afraid. I would avoid social media for a bit if you can manage it. Maybe book something nice for yourself for the new year, a weekend away or a massage, something to look forward to.

Be kind to yourselves, and here's hoping 2017 brings us all better luck.

tigerdog · 16/12/2016 12:29

I'm sorry to hear about your loss little. I had a similar experience almost three weeks ago - a scan at 10.5 weeks showing a perfect baby only measuring a few days behind but with no heartbeat. I'd had two good scans beforehand so no indication that this would happen. I went for surgical management as I wanted it to be over and done with quickly and I was lucky that that they were prepared to give me an emergency slot 48 hours later. I'm also utterly heartbroken, as it took as 4 years TTC and IVF to get this far. It's so hard to be facing Christmas too. I feel like the rest of my life was finally starting only to be stolen away again. I'm really nervous that there are going to be pregnancy announcements from friends where the due date is close to what mine was. That will be hard to bear.

Good luck stress. Glad you're getting it all sorted so quickly. Hope it goes ok.

Sorry you have to wait greedy, that must be hard. I think taking time off is sensible - no need to rush back to work. I was able to work from home a bit, which was good as it meant I didn't feel guilty but didn't have to face people.

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 16/12/2016 12:56

Although I hate that we are all going through this; it is also so reassuring speaking to all of you. It has made it just slightly easier for me to deal with.

I'd had no bleeding or anything, just passing brown mucous the last couple of days and I think that's why this has come as such a shock. I just can't get my head around it.

The nurse said it looks as though it stopped growing around 3-4 weeks ago. I've had flu like symptoms I couldn't shift the last few weeks but just put it down to a viral thing going around. But maybe it was a little sign?! I really don't know.

Just had my bloods taken anyway to check my HB and then I've got to go back to the ward to collect the medication. Although I want all of this to be over now, I'm still dreading taking the tablets :( xx

Littlemisssugarplum88 · 16/12/2016 14:59

Ok so how wrong was I?! I presumed I'd have to take tablets but she inserted 4 pessaries inside me. Perhaps it made it a bit easier that a nurse did it rather than me having to take tablets coz I probably would have felt worse that way (and feeling like I was responsible for this to happen...if that even makes any sense) Just sat on the sofa now waiting for something to happen...xx