Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 24 - tests, treatment, trying again.

[Brummiegirl15]

New thread for us if it's worked on phone! Will paste stats

twilight rubbish of your work. Totally understandable that its upset you. I agree with the idea of being vague and telling them its gynae related, had surgery etc. I suppose if mc was mentioned though, they hopefully wouldn't touch the issue with a barge pole as they really can't hold it against you, as it would be very clear discrimination.

Annie a very good list I would say. Do you have any paperwork on the testing of products that was done? Its worth noting that they don't always look at all the chromosomes, just the ones that are reasonably common causes of mc. If you and dh had your karyotypes looked at, it would flag up if either of you had any translications that may lead to a higher risk of mc. I think you said donor eggs were used last time, so realise that may not be possible. Is there any way you can get a referral to a RMC elsewhere, rather than having to stick with your local hospital?

Morgan sorry you are feeling frustrated about being told all your results are normal. Its a weird place to be hey, wanting something to be wrong so it can be treated. Even though I had high (just about) NK cells, the treatment still didn't work last time so I still sort of feel like its back to square one in a way. Plenty of people on here with all clear normal results, you are not alone.

mrsd well done getting private scan for weekend, hand holding here....

just how are things going at home with Scott?

cloud did you get 12 week scan sorted before or after holiday?

Welcome kazz

Sorry to hear your dad is not doing so well barking x

Hi all, sorry, not managed to keep up very well the last few days but

longest really great news, congratulations
Hope you are all doing well.

barking so sorry to hear your dad is worse again, thinking of you

The those new faces, kazz, annie (sorry if I missed anyone) welcome and I am sorry you find yourselves here.

mrsD good luck this weekend with your scan.

Night all and wishing everyone a very sunny, relaxing weekend.

Oh, sebs good news , enjoy the bubbles

Barking no I wasn't offered IUI. They don't offer IUI or IVF locally, you get sent away to Aberdeen/Dundee.

Bootles I have never seen the histology results but I'll ask to see my notes on Tuesday while I'm waiting for D&C. I'm also requesting a copy of my whole file but that could take weeks. It was my own eggs for IVF, 2 the first time and that didn't work and just one frozen one that resulted in 3rd mc. Our karyotypes were looked at after the 2nd mc and came back ok.

I'm thinking I need to find out what is in the service level agreement between my NHS board and the NHS board that they use for fertility treatment and the one they use for antenatal complications. It may be that there is something in the agreement that allows me to be referred to a gynaecology specialist.

I'll add that to the list!

Sorry to hear your dad isn't well again barking . Hope you get to see him today and that he improves again.

annie, I've heard other people on here talk about being able to choose which specialist they are referred to. Can't remember what the system is called. Not sure if it's something nhs Scotland do as well, but worth looking into. Can't say i necessarily recommend Edinburgh though!!

barking - so sorry to hear your dad is worse again. Fingers crossed that the treatments they are trying now will help.

Welcome to all the new faces. Really sorry that you find yourself here but this is a great thread full of lovely people with a huge wealth of knowledge.

march / annie - is it the nhs 'choose and book' thing you are thinking of?

X

annie sorry, there was someone else who had recently used donor eggs and I am getting confused. Apologies. I'm sorry you feel stuck in the system like this - unfortunately it seems very common with RMC. Also I put translications instead of translocations. Duh. Its good you both have normal karyotypes and thats ticked off the list.

Barking, sorry to hear your dad has taken a turn. Hope you have a better visit over the weekend.

Sasha, looks very complicated to me.

I think it was Flen (?) who said MC keeps giving. Certainly agree as got on the scales today and found I've put on 7lb during the last pregnancy- ggrh and I was already 10lb from my target. Only three weeks to holiday so better get my head down, salad anyone?

barking so sorry to hear your dad is worse, what a horrible worry. Hugs to you.

girlie it's just the last straw isn't it?! I found the low GI stuff helped shift post-MC weight.

Thank you Bootles, I'm really lifted by the knowledge and kindness on this thread! It's definitely the place to be and feels good doing something and knowing what to do next.

Oh no Marchgirl I was hoping Edinburgh would be better, if not best. I'm from there so go down a lot and it would be handy to go to the Royal Infirmary if I could. I saw Dr Thong at Spire Edinburgh for IVF, he's also at the infirmary.

I don't think they do that choice service in Scotland but I'll find out. I think the nhs board is bound to agreements with the big mainland boards. I have a sinking feeling they'll say the service agreement is only for obstetrics and ivf.

If I reach a brick wall then I'm going to start to campaign locally starting with the Patient Opinion website, it may be too late for me but there will be many other women in my situation suffering fertility health inequalities due to living in remote and rural areas. I'm going to channel the rage!

No sign of spotting yet or cramps so intend to make the most of the day. Have a lovely Saturday everyone .

Annie an organisation called fertility fairness UK campaigns on the issues of unequal access to treatment. Where I live in the West Midlands I was entitled to zero help because of a technicality around mc resetting a 3 year clock. In some areas of the UK people are entitled to 3 full rounds of IVF including any frozen embryo transfers regardless of mc. It's so wrong that it's such a post code lottery and makes me very angry. There is a petition on the FF UK website that you can sign. X

I had dr alexander for rmc appt and whilst she was caring to a degree (if a bit matter of fact), she just sticks to the standard nhs protocol and was not keen to follow the Coventry protocol. Pissed off with her telling me it was just bad luck! The most sensible thing she said was to warm thati was very fragile still and she worried about private doctors taking advantage. I gather the fertility people are better,so maybe you'd have more luck going straight to them. I have a friend of a friend who is a nurse in that unit. She's lovely

hi Kazz welcome - hope we can help you.

Barking am so sorry your Dad is getting worse. Thinking of you.

Girlie I was so relieved to miss last night despite feeling a bit guilty about letting the organiser down. But I made decision to go to Milan. Fly tomorrow and it's for 1 night

Hosting a dinner party tonight for us and another couple. Me not drinking will be spotted the second she walks through the door so told her. But this friend was amazing when I went through my mc's and took me out for coffee/ lunch etc when I was so low. Ironically this dinner was planned to say thank you for her support and now I'm pregnant again which seems quite fitting scary

Brummie hope you enjoy the dinner and Milan goes ok

Annie the postcode lottery is so unfair. Where I am you get one nhs round of ivf after two years of infertility. In the next authority you get two, if you go further south you get three. I think everyone should get the same and have the same criteria to qualify for treatment no matter where they live.

Had a nightmare visiting my dad at the hospital this afternoon. Not only does my previously strong, fit and active father look like a 100 year old with a tiny, frail body, I struggled yet again to walk through the corridor of signs 'ultrasound', 'pregnancy assessment', 'delivery suite' etc etc (the ward he is on is above the maternity ward and you have to walk through it to get to the lift). Then past the happy couple taking baby home, and visiting dads, and all the posters about everything baby and pregnancy related. And once on the ward with my dad, can you fucking believe it, the bloke in the bed next door is visited by his granddaughter who had brought her tiny, tiny baby to see great grandad. And I was already upset enough at the thought that my Dad will never get to hold his first grandchild. I couldn't deal with it, just sat there crying. Fortunately Dh kept talking and dad didn't have his glasses on so didn't notice .

Oh no barking I'm sorry your dad is so unwell and as if that isn't hard enough you have these cruel reminders of all you're going through Wish I could come give you a massive hug. XxX

Barking** this must be so hard for you - i'm so sorry your dad is so unwell and that this situation just gets more thorny for you. Jeez, i wish life would just give you a fucking break already pet! Sending you a huge fucking hug xxxx

Barking, so sorry you're going though such a terribly hard time. Hugs to you. xxx

Gosh barking that sounds horribly hard. freckle put it perfectly - wish life would give you break. All so bloody unfair. Sending you hugs and thoughts xxx

barking I'm so sorry you are going through such a hard time seeing your Dad so unwell. You are so caring to give so much support on here while you're going through this. I really appreciate your kindness xxx

Oh barking I'm so sorry your dad is still not well. You've had such a rough time. Echoing freckle here too. I hope he's out of the woods soon. Sending a big hug xx

annie hi and welcome. Sorry I missed your posts earlier. Shit that you have to be here but I'm glad you're finding it a lovely place. It really is!

girlie #ucking MC- it's a shit present giver!!I put a stone on with the last two mcs. My fitness pal has been great (though I need to be more honest with it!)

sebs yay- good news! Looking forward to even better news soon

kazz welcome to the loveliest worst thread to have to be on! Sorry for your losses xx

sasha that looks like a lot to get your head round. Definitely be rattling!

mrsd handholding for your scan this weekend.

Afm cbfm showed a peak yesterday even though boots sticks did on tues (or I thought it looked like it) no idea what's going on! We've dtd every other day so can't do anymore now. Dh away till wed. The tww starts now.

Got my rmc second appointment on Monday and I need to say I've been to Cov and ask will they follow the protocol. Not looking forward to it as she wasn't very positive about it last time (and I'll be on my own). Prof Q seemed to think she would though so fingers crossed.

Oh barking, that sounds awful. What a terrible time you're having. I just want to give you a big hug. Really hope your dad gets a bit better soon.

Welcome to the tww minnie. Bit confusing on the testing but sounds like you've got it covered. I'm 6dpo and feeling nothing. Not feeling that hopeful but i know it's early. Bum bullets start tomorrow. Sigh.

Good luck for the scan today diddly. Got everything crossed for you

Good luck Diddly with the scan x

Sorry to hear Barking the visit to see your dad was so sad. Big hugs coming your way x

Brummie , enjoy Milan x

Currently awake having stayed away for a county swimming association meal in honour of my father. Was a very boozy night and as it was first time drinking in three months, I'm feeling a bit tender ????????

mrsd big hand hold for the scan x

girlie I hope you enjoyed the evening and the suffering doesn't last too long!