Recurrent Miscarriage Support thread 13 - tests, treatment, trying again

[bakingtins]

Welcome everyone! A thread for anyone who has experienced recurrent miscarriages and is in need of information, companionship, tea and sympathy. Newbies welcome to join at any stage.

Start with the traditional recap please......

[Purplefrogshoes]

longest boozle fab news
Hi law I'm so very sorry
I have had erpc 3 times, 1st time I waited and waited to mc naturally but it just didn't happen and 2nd and 3rd I opted for erpc straight away, i had no problems, I haven't had medical management but I'm sure some of the lovely ladies on here will be along shortly to advise

[TinyTear]

Hi Law, so sorry you are here

I had MC1 - natural
MC2 - ERPC
MC3 - Natural
MC4 - ERPC
MC5 - medical management

and honestly I much prefered the ERPC ones, closure, quicker resolution, moving on... medical management was painful, contractions at home, spent the day sitting on the toilet...

I would choose an erpc anytime, but as i had had the one for MC4 just a couple months previously they said it might be better to try medical management

[bakingtins]

Good news boozle hang in there for the next scan!

Welcome law glad you came over to us. Having the support of these lovely ladies does help. I've tended to MC naturally but had medical MC once for incomplete MC and found it quite painful. Bleeding-wise it would be similar to a natural MC at the same stage but ask for decent painkillers if you go for this option. With an ERPC there's a small risk of scarring, but with MM there's a risk it won't work and you need an ERPC anyway so it's a case of which is least bad in your circumstances. If there is any chance of retrieving material for genetic testing I'd ask for that - might be better chance with ERPC but not sure how successful this is likely to be with BO.

[Flen]

Woo! Really pleased for you Boozle!

[Flen]

And hello law. I haven't had medical management with any of mine, but on the last one (also my third) I opted for D&C (same as ERPC I think) mainly to get it over with, but also, as baking says, because it was my third and therefore about to enter testing for rmc, we felt there was a better chance of successful genetic testing following D&C.

[Lawofsod]

Thanks ladies. You are lovely :-)

I guess I feel a bit like that stupid when-you-are-pregnant thing - you don't want to mess anything up and feel like you just have to deal with discomfort etc. I feel a bit like I should man up and deal with it - but it is so horrible. My first MMC - which was later in the end, don't know how much that changes things when it isn't growing right - was awful. Awful. Quicker, less blood, quicker closure seems like a much better option from a personal point of view.

Urgg I'm rubbish at decisions at the best of times...

[cloudjumper]

Just a quick check to frantically wave at boozle and longest and sending big hugs for brilliant scan results! Hope you can relax a bit now, ladies!

Sorry for not name-checking with everyone else, totally swamped at work...

[longestlurkerever]

Great news boozle! So pleased!

Law. Welcome but so sorry you find yourself here. I haven't had an erpc and haven't suffered too badly with early natural miscarriages but most women on here say they much prefer getting it over with and I was really disappointed not to get any test results from the last embryo which would be a factor in favour of an erpc for me ( I almost said next time but fingers crossed there won't be one. If this bean makes it I am hanging up my ttc boots. Much as I have previously been attracted to the idea of a dc3 I am not going through it all again.

[Bristolian1]

great news boozle

law I've had medical management and also ERPC. Medical management was pretty painful and gory but it was sort of mentally better (for me) as it really sunk in that I had miscarried. ERPC was much cleaner and tidier, and over quickly, but I think it delayed the emotional healing for me a bit, maybe. Neither is really a good option is it? Sorry you're in this horrible situation

[Tumtimes1]

Hi everyone just popping my head in. My history is x3 mcs and now have healthy baby girl.

This thread helped me enormously. I found particularly that it's important to actively seek and research on threads such as this as everyone's story is different and the info can be invaluable. I know that it helped me to get my baby in the end when I thought all hope was gone. I'm 36 and my daughter is nearly 9 weeks old.

Wishing you all the best xx

[Boozle80]

Hey Tum, that's great news - love a success story, bet you're over the moon :)

Welcome Law, sorry you've found yourself in the best worst place to be in the world. Everyone on here is lovely, and you'll find they are the most supportive bunch you'll ever meet!
I had three ERPC's and they were very clean and easy although the emotional side of waking up and knowing it was all over was really hard. I had a few complications after one as well although they don't seem to have had any long term effects. I would go down that route again myself. It's a tough decision for you to make but we're all here as a sounding board whenever you need us.

[Erica21]

Hi Law
Sorry for your losses. I have just had my 2nd ERPC in 3 months. 1st was for a MMC at 12 weeks, 2nd was for MC from a haematoma under the baby at 9 weeks. I wasn't offered medical mgmnt, they don't seem to offer that in Kent, but with the 1st I MC naturally at home but still needed ERPC for retained tissue. 2nd MC I was offered ERPC straight away (no HB on Friday, ERPC Monday morning.) I personally wanted the ERPC to be able to move on from the continual heavy bleeding I had for two weeks during the pregnancy, couldn't cope with another few weeks of more bleeding. I do feel like the 2nd ERPC has taken more of a toll on my body, a lot more sore and crampy but still am happy with my decision and as I feel like I can physically heal quicker even though my mind is a bit mucked up I hope you're ok

[Marchgirl]

Brilliant news boozle and longest!
Sorry you find yourself here law but hopefully all these lovely ladies can help. I have had one natural and 2 missed m/c, both treated with medical management. Unfortunately I'm one of the 10% of people it didn't work for first time. For the 1st one I had a second dose which was successful. After the 2nd MMC I tried med man again, and again it didn't work. i started to bleed but virtually stopped again after a day. Was due to go back for second dose again 5 days later but then started to mc naturally so didn't end up going back. However still testing positive 3.5 wks later so not over yet

I went for mm because I felt it was more natural and because I was worried about damage (although I think this is much less common with new techniques). I agree with bristol about it making it sink in more this way, which I needed.i didn't find it too painful and didn't use the strong painkillers they gave me (I was12+2 but sac was only about 9)
Obv it has to be a personal choice and I don't regret doing mm but probably wouldn't do it if there was a next time (hopefully not) because it clearly just doesn't work for my body and also because in future I'd want them to catch the products (sorry), rather than me having to deal with that, as it was upsetting. Sorry for long post! Good luck whichever you choose.

[dildoos]

Woohoo boodle happy days that's turned my wet rainy day sunny!

Law sorry your here too. I was lucky enough to naturally mc but my sister had a medically managed mc and I went with her as her dH not great in hospitals and it seems painful bless her heart. Oh why can't they make it simple if it has to end make it pain free xx

[Justonemoretime]

Boozle and Longest, yay!
Law, I've had 4 erpcs (one repeat procedure) and all were easy enough on the day. I had a septum than no one knew about at the time which caused issues but its been removed now. I expect it I had had a 'normal' uterus, they would have been totally straight forward. The 4th one I had done was with u/s guidance and it was a perfect textbook procedure with af coming on 28 days later and 'products' cleanly collected and tested. Also, I found that the icky tired pg feelings went very quickly once it was done. Yes there is a risk of damage but its rare and if it dies happen, its usually fixable by one of the specialist hospitals. Hope that helps. Good luck.

[Justonemoretime]

sorry about the many tyops. Stoopid auto correct on phone. Hopefully it made sense...

[Justonemoretime]

Its my scan tomorrow. I should be 6.3 or so. Nervous.... I've left cover for my classes at work just in case u don't go back in... pessimistic or pragmatic?

[Justonemoretime]

*I

[tannyLoo]

Double yay to Boozle and Longest, such great news! TIAP!

Law so sorry that you're facing this decision. I wish I could offer some sage advice, but my body seems to be very efficient at expelling, and I've had five natural MCs. That has also partly been out of choice, as I chose to wait a couple of times to see if my body would do it naturally.

A bit taboo, but I had a termination when I was much younger, and the procedure is the same as an erpc. I was really fucked up emotionally after that experience, and this has left me with some hangups, so that influences things for me...

[Flen]

Just Totally sensible I think. Cover that covers you. Will be thinking of you.

[longestlurkerever]

just. Pessimistic probably but we have all been there. Then again if your classes are sorted you can ditch work and celebrate! Hope it goes well. You might see a hb.

Cuddled up on sofa with dd. Have felt awful crabby mood lift slightly this week so am trying to make up for being mean. tiny. O forgot to say we ended up in peppa pig world on sun. Was supposed to be at a christening in poole but were thwarted by a closed road and a puncture. Was fun!

[longestlurkerever]

tanny what is TIAP?

[bakingtins]

tIAP = Today I Am Pregnant.

just good luck for tomorrow. I think you are cleverly subverting Sod's law - if you are prepared for the worst it won't happen.

[Justonemoretime]

Longest it means Today I Am Pregnant and today, I am. Hopefully also tomorrow...

[longestlurkerever]

Ah yes, of course! Xx