Recurrent Miscarriage Support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 10

[bakingtins]

Welcome everyone - pull up a chair! A thread for anyone who has suffered multiple miscarriages and is in need of information, moral support, tea or sympathy. Newbies very welcome.

Can we start the thread with a recap of where we are all up to again, please?

Hello Bootles. You have had a horrible time and I understand your nervousness now. I really hope you get good news at your next scan. When is it?

I haven't started my tests either yet - my first st Mary's appointment is on Wednesday- so am not much use about your medical questions. I have a dd just a bit younger than your ds though- also an uncomplicated first pregnancy and am waiting for my results from a similar product catching experience! Can you remember how long yours took to arrive?

Just gave dd a massive hug and kiss as feeling soppy. She hugged me back and said 'I love.... Captain Barnacles Bear!' Total monkey-head.

Hi bootles!! It sounds like you've really been through it and being nervous is very natural. I hope you get some good news when you go for a scan. Remember there will be happier and better times ahead. You've had a DC so you know your body can do it. Just have to keep fighting.

I'm pleased to read mr twilight is recovering. Hope twilight can keep her nursing hat on for a little longer hehe.

I went out last night and probably drank more than I should have. My friends (younger than me) were talking abt names they'll pick WHEN they have children. I wish I was their age again and able to really believe I might get to pick one myself one day. Just about to start fertility treatment (again) but really not feeling optimistic.

Any suggestions how to inject positivity and self-belief right now?

X

Welcome bootles Sorry that you have to find yourself here. But yay for your BFP! How far along are you now?
I'd say stick with the Clexane. I also have to take heparin when pg, for a different reason, though (had a DVT a couple of years ago). It is very safe and usually very little side effects. And yes, there is reseach to show that it helps in pregnancy, apart from the blood-thinning effect, a lot of people who have had recurring mcs have/are taking it. Hope that you'll get some answers from St Mary's and a treatment plan!

cat Ignore, ignore, ignore. They have no idea. And no point telling them all about it because until they experience pg loss/infertility etc., they, well, have no idea.
I struggle with that when seeing friends who have no DC or who never have experienced any problems with ttc, mc etc. They just don't get it, and how could they? I used to be like that... Wish I could be like that again!
Don't take it personally, can you do something nice for yourself this weekend?!

I'm questioning my wish for another DC after this week, and especially after today - DS has been a total PITA, complete parenting fail. He is always pushing boundaries at the moment, it's exhausting. Urgh.
Looking forward to a big glass of ...

Thanks jbrd it's so nice to vent to you ladies who understand.

I know my friends love me and don't mean to hurt me but sometimes it can weigh you down. I'm feeling much better now, been working in the sunny garden sorting boarders out ready to plant a few new things. It's my tonic ATM :)

DS sounds like he's a handful sometimes, bless him. How old did you say he is? Children are always testing aren't they? Hope I'll cope if a DC does come along, I love my sleep lol.

Totally sounds like you've earnt that glass of wine and a sit down tonight!! Hope DH doesn't spoil it for you by putting the footie on...

XXX

Thanks all for the welcome.

longest: Wednesday. For second loss the results took 3 weeks, for third loss I am trying to remember if it was a month or 6 weeks. Yes the catching the products process was all a bit...well ridiculous in a way. Rubber gloves at the ready..and I read somewhere about a seive and really wished I'd thought of it at the time! Hoping your results don't take too long to come back. Your last mc must have been quite recent? Hope your first appointment goes well. Ah your DD sounds very sweet!

cat yes keep on fighting is generally my tbeory at the moment. I'm 40 with no time to waste, which spurs me on (in a somewhat panicky way)

A combo of fertility treatment and RMC must be incredibly tough. Definitely not helped by friends who still have their 'pregnancy innocence' (though they may be lovely in other ways!). Pregnancy loss takes away that innocence. So you have wisdom that they don't (even if you'd rather not). Be kind to yourself, look after you. Sorry I haven't managed to get up to speed with everyone, but fertility treatment has worked for you before? Everything crossed it works again.

Jbrd Thanks, 6+4, but really expecting a bad scan next week. Did you have a DVT in pregnancy? This thread really helps with the clexane thing..I think I just struggle to accept my body may be doing something less than ideal, and I still think clotting is unlikely to be the cause for me - but I guess why take the risk? Sigh..

And I very much doubt you are having a parenting fail, just a bad day! They can push you to your limits hey. Enjoy your wine, sure you deserve it.

Hi bootles ,

Catching the miscarriage content sounds traumatic. How do you manage to get through it? I'm so squeamish I don't know how I'll cope with that if I have a 3rd mc.

I hope the scan will provide you with reassurance about this pregnancy. I know you have been through such a lot and can imagine just how hard it can be to believe it could work out. I know someone who had five mcs before her first child and now she has three DC. Never give up hope!!!

I've had two mmcs following fertility treatment. We have been ttc for five years and I am now 34 years old. I was placed on a combination of Letrozole and progesterone last year (while recovering from surgery with a view to starting IVF) when I got pregnant. The drugs worked both times to get my BFP but I lost the babies at around 11 weeks - 1st blighted ovum and 2nd baby died around 8 weeks.

XxX

Hi everyone I see so much is going on in such a small passing! Glad to see everyone is mostly on a litter note.... Cant chat long (my husband thinks I'm obsessing again) My update is that I have been fatigued to no end!!! Wrap in a side of af cramps! Its been this way for 7 days.... Its getting worst, not very hopeful.

Longest I'm not sure how long you have been taking them or how much but if you stop suddenly it may cause a light bleed. I didn't realize you would have testing soon, sorry to have suggested but many women swear by it. I may start back my self, it helped with mood for me.

Good luck ladies!

Please don't apologise coco! I didn't know I would be being tested so soon either. It didn't even occur to me that my insurance would cover a private appointment as fertility stuff is normally the first thing they exclude and my insurance has a lot of exclusions! It gave me hope when I was in a miserable place that I could do something to help at least that aspect of things so I am glad I took it. Will stop at least until I have seen the consultant on Wednesday though.

Bootles - yes, my latest miscarriage was just over two weeks ago. They originally said 1-2 weeks for results but now are saying 3-4, which is annoying as I was hoping to have my results in time for my consultation on Wednesday. Thanks again whoever mentioned the sieve! Catlover - It was gross, but it was important to me to find out a cause so I didn't mind too much. When I asked at the hospital about how they could test if I naturally miscarried they weren't helpful - just said that it was useful if they could test some tissue but it often wasn't possible. The only thing I really didn't appreciate was being made to wait over an hour in the EPU waiting room with an embryo in a box even though there was no one else there. Surely even if the waiting was necessary they could have taken the box off me when I first arrived?

Sorry you've had a tough few days JBrd. They tend to go in little phases ime so you're due a few weeks of delightful behaviour!

PS Coco. Sorry you're feeling rubbish. Whereabouts in your cycle are you? Fatigue is rubbish - makes everything feel like a massive pain.

Longest just 8dpo!!!! took Benadryl because my symptoms turned into itchy warmth behind my ears.... My body is terrible to me. That was a terrible experience (I would have had a fit) Glad your getting to answers soon!! Hugs

Can't wait to get my Coventry results... And get a plan of action...

On other news the counsellor referred by the GP called me on Friday when I was picking up my daughter at the nursery and I was all flustered so I couldn't talk. So will call her Monday to make an appointment.

Hi cat, so you got pregnant on the medications before, which surely means there is hope - though I totally get that hope is sometimes hard to hold onto. Day at a time and all that..

Yes product catching was unpleasant - I have a medical background so am generally not too disturbed by such things, but of course its different in that situation.

longest sorry to hear last loss was so recent. Definitely worth trying to get a result on the chromosomes (a dreadful wait) at least its more information.Hope the results are soon and your appointment goes well.

coco are you in the dreaded tww then?

tiny, is Coventry where they do NK cell testing? Hope you get your results soon.

I am now wondering if I should look into the whole NK cell thing..

I have had a bleed today. God I can't bear it. A combination of a bleed and an inconclusive scan on Wednesday can only be bad. Spent the afternoon in a walk in centre - damned if I'm waiting until Wednesday and my St.Marys appointment to confirm it. Think I will miss the clexane this evening, just in case its the culprit, but I know I'm clutching at straws...

Oh the result of the walk in centre was am EPAU appointment tomorrow..these things always happen to me at the weekend..

Bootles, sorry to hear you've had a bleed. It's horrible. Were they able to scan you at the walk-in clinic? If no cramps, things may not be as bad as you fear.
Here's my experiences of bleeding and the drugs we take - my very big bleed was put down to an aspirin+cyclogest combo, and the baby survived it (at that time). here are my experiences. Wishing you all the best. x

bootles so sorry to hear you've had a bleed. Have you had any other symptoms? My friend had a bleed in early pregnancy and everything turned out to be fine so don't lose heart. I can imagine you must feel apprehensive, hope you get some good news at your scan tomorrow! It's so rubbish having to wait.

I have a feeling my drugs will help me to conceive again but not so sure I will hold onto the baby. I feel like they are a sticking plaster not a wholesale solution.

Has anyone ever considered using an egg donor via IVF? It's an option for us if I mc again but frighteningly expensive! X

tiny glad they are sorting your counselling. That's really good and will help. Xxx

just I've read your blog about the heavy bleed due to progesterone and aspirin. Scary stuff. So sorry for all you've been through, you are a lovely lady and it's just not fair.

Hope these next pregnancies have happy outcomes for us all! XX

Cat, thank you. None of us deserve this. In a funny way, I have grown from these experiences. I really appreciate your kind words. May we all get our happy endings! xx

It does become part of you just, something you grow and learn from. That way our lost babies stay with us and make their mark on the world through us (little tear runs down my cheek thinking of our little angels). XxX

(((hugs))) x

bootles So sorry to hear about your bleed! Makes your heart stop, every time. But please do not give all hope up just yet - there are so so many stories of women who had this and ended up with healthy babies.
But I know how you feel

Ah, yes, the product catching...not nice! I have to admit that I'm a 'toilet-fisher', never managed to get the sieve handy in time! But my need to know if this was 'it' and -for the 3rd mc- to get it tested always made me do it. Sigh.

just Just a little peek on your blog, too - that must have been so scary!

Feeling a bit better today - DS was much easier to deal with, we had a nice morning out strawberry picking, followed by a nice afternoon at home, baking cupcakes. And I managed to drag myself to the gym (fuelled by my 1.6kg weight loss this week) and have just finished this darned assessment, which is due today.

And relax...

Bootles - it must be so hard not to stress. How far along are you and for how many days have you been using clexane? Clexane is known to cause (harmless) bleeds, so fx that it's just that in your case too. Will you go to EPU tomorrow for a scan? Have you had a scan so far?

Bootles - very sorry to hear you've had a bleed. It's hard not to be frantic with worry after repeated experiences where this represents bad news, but there is still every chance its one of those bleeds that happens in healthy pregnancies. I acknowledge that I would not be able to think this way if it were me. I have everything crossed for you at EPU today. Thoughts are with you.

JBrd - glad to hear you're feeling a bit better. I'm impressed by your gym visit. My steadily increasing weight is really getting me down at the mo but can't seem to find the motivation/time.

Just - I haven't had a chance to look at your blog yet but definitely intend to. Good on you for doing something to raise awareness.

Good luck with the counselling appointment Tiny. I've for my first appointment tonight which I both can't wait for and am dreading. I've also been considering talking to my gp about anti-depressants as I feel really low, and low in a way that feels more... hole-like... than how sad you would expect to be in this situation. Does that make sense? I'm literally crying all the time, cutting self off from everyone, irritable, tired, can't sleep, overeating, not doing things that'd make me feel better, neglecting everything etc. However I'm worried about anti-depressants whilst TTC. Does anyone have any experience of this? Sorry to moan - I'm a bit worried about myself.

bootles thinking of you today - hope you get better news than you are expecting

twilight good luck with the counselling. No experience of antiDs but I know that women do take them whilst TTC and whilst pregnant so certain ones must be ok. Talking to your GP about it sounds like the way to go.

Bootles - I am sorry you've had a scary development. Keeping everything crossed for you. Someone on the pg after mc thread went through a terrifying about of bleeding but last I heard all was well with her pregnancy so I really hope that is the case for you.

Twilight Sorry you are feeling so low. You sound really on top of it though - well done for taking charge and seeking help. I hope you find the right treatment for you. I haven't taken ads but know people on them that haven't stopped for ttc. Sure your doctors will be able to give you the right advice.