How are you feeling after MC?

[freelancegirl]

Hello everyone,

I though I would start a new thread for all of us who have been through a mc recently or not so recently and want to carry on swapping stories, bitching about crap feelings, celebrating any good feelings etc etc.

I will kick off, but I hope some of you will join me.

Bleeding has more or less stopped so am still worried about that 'last 2cm of product' the scan revealed still needed to emerge. Docs have given me antibiotics to ward off infection and am due back for another scan around 12th April.

Today I woke up feeling like shit! Emotionally I am still getting better but I feel so tired at times. I woke up feeling exhausted today, but there are other times during the day when I will be walking around fine and then suddenly feel totally knackered. No idea why. Hormones shifting? It's almost the same tiredness as had when pg. Sometimes I feel a bit sick too and am having the odd dizzy spell. I don't think there's any infection but like I said am already on antibiotics.

I am also really annoyed about my weight. I haven't weighed myself since the mc as don't have any scales at home but I go away at weekend so I can weigh myself tomorrow. But I know I had put on about 5lbs in the first trimester and my small jeans are still not fitting me. I was a bit of a gym bunny before getting pg (which coincided with xmas so I was eating more/exercising less anyway and had put on 3lbs, which I wasn't then bothered about as I knew I could shift it after xmas - not expecting to be a) pg and b) have an mc). Now I feel bloated and miserable about my weight because am guessing am around 8lbs heavier than my best. I realise there are other priorities but now there's no baby I would like to have my size and my energy back!

As regards moving forward and possibly ttc again, I have bought two cheap pg tests and when I am brave enough am going to see if I get a BFN. I feel that would be a step in the right direction to start with.

Hope all are well and feeling positive. Feel free to join in xxx

OK, adding myself to the stats

magicofthinkingbig Age 38 MMC 17/3/11 TTC#2 cycle 1
freelancegirl Age 36 MC 19/03/11 WTTC after AF - End April?
ReallyUseful engine Age 35 MC March WTTC after AF
InmaculadaConcepcion Age 40 MMC 15/03/11 TTC #2 cycle 1

I know we're not celebrating as such, but we are commiserating.

Welcome dooscooby, FX

Welcome Doo Agree 100% with what you said. As I am fortunate to have 2 children already (and I do count my blessings) I heard that my DH has had to quash alot of comments such as 'A 3rd? Really, why do you want a 3rd anyway?' Which is nice.

Arrgggh! Am having a RL glass of wine, v. naughty, DH not home yet. Sod it. Terrible birthday but I spent my 30th crying because I had an ectopic pregnancy and felt heartbroken. Anyway the following year I had DS. So just a temporary sorrow I hope. I wish 6 months away and hope we are all in different places (pregnant and not drinking virtual wine )

Thank you ladies, as bleeding usual. You are saving the day xxxx

Really Do you live in London? I didn't realise you have two kids, it's difficult to keep up with remembering what everyone has, but three would be lovely when you can (that is WHEN).

RL glass of wine sounds lovely too! I just bunked off work (from home...) with DH and had a lovely walk in the sun on the heath where we live, stopped off for a coffee on the grass and was SO tempted by the pub garden. But resisted due to 5am start tomorrow. See I DO do some work :)

Sorry to hear your 30th was crap but good that life got better. And your 36th is likely to be brilliant. It's a funny thing turning 35, it feels kinda a seminal age don't you think? And not just in a fertility way! Am 37 in July, time flies doesn't it. Yes I remember 27 like it was not so long ago at all. I see from our small stats list that we are all around the same age so far, which is nice.

Welcome Doo! I feel exactly the same, you really summed up my feelings well. This kind of situation really does 'out you'. I almost feel like saying to people that I am not really into having kids just to shut them up. I was quite anti-child for a while as one by one a few of my friends fell off the pub wagon and into the family one but I think tbh it was because I was scared of this exact situation happening. Getting around to trying and then not being able to/having a mc/something going wrong and ending up openly wanting to and openly failing. And here I am. Hmm. Hopefully temporarily.

Actually Doo can I ask a question - what is the 2ww? I gather it is something to do with ovulating but as I got pg quickly last time I haven't quite got that far yet. I am sure I will become more familiar with it soon.

There were so many cute babies out and about today. Maybe I will get broody again very soon. In fact my body does weird things still when seeing a baby at the moment. Strange, hormones. And indeed strange (no comma) hormones too!

Inmaculada Bottle of pink cava? Now you're talking! Today is definitely a day for me to veer from my usual winter red to my summer pink :) Oh, were it not for the 5am start and some work to do tonight that I have been putting off for ages as I am so bloody distracted and baby-brained still (there should be a name for MC Brain) and the damn deadline is tomorrow.

Everyone else add yourself to our little list if you can! Really have a good birthday evening if you can xx

cheers, Really - Many Happy Returns.

I am soooo sorry girlies for not being around- RL got in the way. Not a cats chance in hell of catching up. Been to work: early starts. Posting from phone as per usual. 2ww= two week wait: from ovulation until your period starts. Brown discharge continuing- getting rather fed up now, just want it to end. Work quite manic- good thing; no time to ponder and grumble. Grabbing a quick dinner, then to bed. 4 am start tomorrow, as flying out to Germany for a works conference. Night night. Will read back when I get a moment, if I can keep up. Nice to know you guys are here for when I need you. Keep feeling quite tearful when I get a moment to myself. Just glad I'm rushed off my feet at the moment. Now I'm completely knackered - just want my bed! G'night girlies xxx
Sorry for treating the thread like a diary sometimes, cathartic to my recovery I believe, apologies for selfishness, thanks for bearing with me and sympathising. x

Crossed posts immacuada! Happy birthday Reallyuseful: many happy returns of the day Hun! Hoping you are holding your baby in your arms for your next one x

Thank you for the greetings!

Freelance Oh, are you in Hampstead? Very very beautiful. We're in Richmond beside the park. Was never going to give that sort of info away but who in god's name reads these boards? I hope Everyone else has got to enjoy the sunshine. 35 does indeed feel like a seminal age, I remember (just) my mum turning 35!

Sorry Doo to steal your thunder, but 2WW is the 2 weeks in between ovulation (and ttc) and your period or big fat positive (bfp)

Immaculada Is probably laughing at us, what is the temp there? Pink cava sounds awesome, I have some! Hurrah!

Big birthday snogs xxx

Diamonds We're here, we can fill you in. Good luck at the conference xxx

LOL! I am always thinking that there are a couple of people I know who probably read these boards and that they have probably identified me already, knowing am freelance and knowing what I am writing about :) but who is to say. And I guess it doesn't matter. I will confirm it for them - I am in Blackheath not Hampstead. Love Richmond though.

I can't remember my mum's 35th but I do remember her 40th. She was 31 when she had me. But yes, it is a seminal age I think. Feels like time to grown up.... And as you might have guessed by my propensity to drink lots, go out lots and not have a day job, at 36 I am very, very grown up

Thanks for the 2ww info. I will need an ovulation guide I think! Adding to the three books have ordered on MC and hormones on amazon I have added some ov sticks.

God I want some chocolate. Chocolate AND pink cava. MMMmmm.

good evening lovely ladies. Happy Birthday Really make sure you enjoy your low key Birthday, I know exactly how you feel. Had aglass or two of wine last night, but not really got my arm back...must keep practising. Thanks again Diamonds for asking, I will apparently be getting an appointment through for about 12 weeks time, but I'm not sure what will happen at it. They took a sample from the baby's cord and sent it away for analysis, but no idea when I'll find out the results of that either!! Feeling very ill informed if I'm honest, and not really sure who to go to for answers (if there are any). I have to point out that I feel I may have mislead you (unintentionally) my run of "bad luck" follows three successful if complicated pregnancies. I have three beautiful daughters, and really ought to slink off with my tail between my legs as I should be grateful for what I have and learn to get a grip. Any way drink up ladies chin chin xxx

Bigflip no-one needs to be hiding any tails between legs on here whether they have no children or are the head of the Von Trapp family (Nazi collaboration and nun-fiddling aside). We are all here because we have had a mc and that is distressing for everyone no matter how many kids they have. So don't be afraid to big up your three beautiful Little Flip Flops :)

Do add yourself to our list though! So far we have:

magicofthinkingbig Age 38 MMC 17/3/11 TTC#2 cycle 1
freelancegirl Age 36 MC 19/03/11 WTTC after AF - End April?
ReallyUseful engine Age 35 MC March WTTC after AF
InmaculadaConcepcion Age 40 MMC 15/03/11 TTC #2 cycle 1

thanks for that, felt a bit of a fraud Ok then, not sure how to add myself though
Bigflipflop Age 39 most rect mmc 01/04/11 WTTC after AF.....i think xxx

Ah, but losing a pregnancy is still tough big, even when you already have DC. Each one represents hopes and dreams and what might have been. The extra difficulty is having to keep a happy face in place for the existing DC.
Luckily my DD is still too young to understand at this stage, but even so...

Yep, day temps in the mid 20s here and the nights are getting warmer too. So much so, that I've been scurrying around trying to find a lower tog sleeping bag for DD as her 2.5 is too hot now.

oh and I'm not a nazi....at least not last time i check, or a nun fiddler for that matter

X-posted freelance - same thoughts, expressed somewhat more flamboyantly in your case!

PS relieved to hear that big

Freelance Oh, Blackheath is glorious, I always vow to go more often when I do go! Oh bugger age, I think 40 is young these days, I am practically a teenage mum compared to most mothers out there! Just age, mind..!

Flip Sod it, you are entitled to crave as may children as you wish and whatever order you lose a pregnancy it still hurts like f**k. I just don't feel like I have had my quota yet. I feel so tremendously grateful but dream of my future children endlessly. I am so sorry that you got to a stage where they actually have to do an analysis and I hope very soon you have a change in fortune.

It's horrible isn't it Immaculada, and you're right the hardest part is keeping the pain from them. Mine are 14 (ironically had her Birthdya party the night I was in hospital having the ERPC) 7 and 4, so stiff upper lip certainly in pretty much permanent use her. Where abouts do you live by the way? or have I missed that and should already know? xxx

Damn, I can't believe I didn't think of Nun Fiddler before now for my nickname :) Do you think anyone would take offence...?

Updated list:

magicofthinkingbig Age 38 MMC 17/3/11 TTC#2 cycle 1
freelancegirl Age 36 MC 19/03/11 WTTC after AF - End April?
ReallyUseful engine Age 35 MC March WTTC after AF
InmaculadaConcepcion Age 40 MMC 15/03/11 TTC #2 cycle 1
Bigflipflop Age 39 most rect mmc 01/04/11 WTTC after AF

Thats how I feel Really, I don't feel as though I've completed my family, although I am incredibly grateful for those that I have. I feel quite positive about the tests, as I'm hoping there's something really really simple wrong with me, that can be sorted in a trice!!! (wishful thinking). Part of me keeps thinking to just keep going for it, as an ex sales person I can't help thinking it's a numbers game, but at the same time chest crushingly aware that is probably not the case

I think Nun Fiddler is a splendid name

...sorry big! I'm in Madrid atm.

How lovely, what an exciting place to live

Oh please can we re-name this board 'Miscarriage support for Nun-Fiddlers and ex-Nazis'? Oh please?

marvelous plan Really oooh and look at meeee and my bold