Late miscarraige 20ish weeks - need to share my story.

[iloveblue]

Hello all

We lost out baby yesterday afternoon.

It was all very quick (thankfully). I had been having period pains for a couple of days and was advised that this was normal and to take some paracetemol. Thursday evening these pains turned into what felt like mini-contractions (my 3rd baby so I recognised the pain) - I was up all night in pain, made two more phonecalls and ended up on labour ward at 9am yesterday morning.
I was scanned and no heartbeat was detected.
I was given the pill to induce labour at about 12 and told to go home as it could take 48 hrs. Went home for an hour to grab some stuff - then straight back into hospital where baby was born an hour or so later. I am 99% convinced I was already in labour as it was so quick.

We decided not to see the baby - and were back home that night. I was 20 weeks.

No idea why this happened - lots of blood tests and swabs taken.

Looking back I was amazingly calm yesterday - it didn't feel real, at times I thought I was about to wake up and it was all a bad dream. Since I got home it has been much harder - have cried so much I can't physically cry anymore at the moment. DH has been amazing - as well as the rest of my family, my 2 boys are staying with my mum for the weekend which has been a huge help.

I keep seeing reminders everywhere - just broke down again earlier after seeing the anomaly scan date filled in on calendar, we never made it that far.

I'm also having tremendous feelings of guilt and disloyalty about the fact that we chose not to see the baby (although I know it was the right decision at the time).

I have had a niggling feeling all the way through this pregnancy that something wasn't right - particularly over the last few weeks as I wasn't feeling much(any?)movement. I was finding it hard to commit to things that involved baby plans - eg booking private gender scan, booking holiday during maternity leave etc and I never felt like that when pregnant with my sons.

So many questions and feelings - I felt it might help to write some of them down here.
I am really keen to chat with others who have gone through this - and I will be doing this in real life too.

Sorry for the long post - thankyou for reading it, if you made it to the end!

Hi BreakDancingBadger - what a BRILLIANT name!!!

I think it will feel totally unreal until baby is in my arms, so far so good - 15 weeks now and still a lovely little heartbeat. One step at a time.

Time is standing still - husband only been away 3 weeks and feels like 2 months!! 6 weeks to go - hope it speeds up soon.

My parents aren't far away, and I have great friends around me, but nobody has been through a missed miscarriage and subsequently been pregnant. I am the first of my group of friends to have a baby and it's quite a taboo subject really. It seems once it's happened, people just think you're fine!

Huge congratulations on your little girl, I bet that was the most fantastic feeling!! I was really brave this week and I did buy my first little thing - a little babygrow - a big step!!

littledink How are you doing?

where can i get a free age progression done of my dead child?

I was 18 weeks when I lost my son
On 04/02/14 I had mild pain in my lower
Belly went to the toliet and my waters broke
I lost a lot of blood went to the hosptal
And was told I was loseing the baby I had a pill on the
Thursday to bring on my labour by Saturday
Morning I was having strong contractions
He was born at 3.15am my tiny angel
We took him home and held him for hours
We buried him the next day with family.
It's been 6 months since I lost Patrick and
I think about him every day it still kills me but
It feels like everyone's just forgot about him
And now a few of my friends have had boys and it's
Like a kick in the head I feel horrable saying why
Do you get to keep your son but mine had to
Die. All I have to memory him by is a hand and
Foot print and a few photos my perfect
Boy.

Hi I was just wondering if anybody went on to have a successful pregnancy after a missed miscarriage and how long it took you to get pregnant?
I have just had a miscarriage at 17 weeks, I had no symptoms of a miscarriage at all, I went for a routine consultant appointment on Thursday last week and was told there was no heartbeat, they took me for a scan which confirmed the baby died, they said it died the week before. I went back the day after for the tablet and then I went back on sunday for the induction of labour. We held our baby and got a little memory box given to us with photos. I'm still in shock about the whole thing, I feel totally lost and can't stop crying, but we know we want to try again as soon as I stop bleeding. I'm so scared of it taking ages to fall pregnant again, as it took us 10 months in the first place x

I'm sorry to hear that, Cheryl. You will probably get more responses if you repost your comment in a new thread