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Support for essbee 2

423 replies

anorak · 26/09/2004 10:51

Here it is...

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
essbee · 28/09/2004 22:08

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JJ · 28/09/2004 22:16

Do try to get it into the revised one. I think it's natural for your son to hang on his good memories of his dad. It doesn't mean that he should be in contact with him so much though. His dad is a horrible mean man who hurt his son and you.

How did today go? Sorry if I missed it.

Thomcat · 28/09/2004 22:17

Hi babes, how did DS get on at school today? Is her okay?

essbee · 28/09/2004 22:22

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wobblyknicks · 28/09/2004 22:27

At least they are taking it seriously to some degree - hope it doesn't happen again.

Thomcat · 28/09/2004 22:28

Yes hopefully babes. Sorry you have so much to deal with

JJ · 28/09/2004 22:29

Glad it went ok.. hope it stays that way.

I'm off to bed. Sleep well, if it's at all poss.

essbee · 28/09/2004 22:34

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essbee · 30/09/2004 20:49

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glitterfairy · 30/09/2004 20:54

HIya essbee how are you? I am glad you have been feeling better and hope that the decorating gives you a lift!

essbee · 30/09/2004 20:57

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essbee · 30/09/2004 21:08

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glitterfairy · 30/09/2004 21:30

LOl essbee perhaps not a coincidence then and thanks am fine just knackered have been travelling alot lately.

essbee · 30/09/2004 21:46

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Twinkie · 01/10/2004 11:00

Essbee - Honey ring me please about the 9th - DP may go up there to lpay golf but it may be too late for him but would love to drive you up and then we can have a nice chat!!

Do not agree to anything AH asks of you - speak to your solicitor and tell them that you want the works in the petition - the judge will look at him as more of a tosser when it comes to the final settlement and you coul get more - this in turn will give you and your DC security that you desperatley need - and why should he not have his dirty linen aired before the courts - he should have thought of what he did before he did it shouldn't he!!

And ring the CSA and cry - tell the you are broke and that he is working and you are not getting your full 20% and you and the kids are having to go without - he works for someone so it should be easy to get money directly from his compnay if needs be.

And next time he rings say that you are not discussing the divoerce or the children with him - weverything is to go through the solicitor - he will poop his pants - X2b did and funnily enough became much more reasonable!!

Oh why did he say he wanted the violence left off - you need this on there - think if he went for residency or tried to hurt you again - having it on record in your divorce would be of great advantage to you. And he knows that counter petitioning you is only going to cost him loads and will actually do not good in court!!

I am serious what I said about the statement if you ned it though and your first thread shuold be on here for you to print out and give to your solicitor as well as notes from your doctor and SS - so he can;t deny any of it the

anorak · 03/10/2004 10:17

Hi essbee, how are things?

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essbee · 03/10/2004 11:19

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JanH · 03/10/2004 11:30

essbee, yes of course you can choose to be private, but if you do and he doesn't then all your "friends" only get his version of what has happened - this sort of thing will happen again and again unless you tell them the whole thing...I'm sorry, I know you don't want to, but I honestly think you would ultimately feel better for it, once you've got over the embarrassment and discomfort of revealing so much of yourself.

I'm sorry you had such a bad night, esp after your wildly productive few days - you are doing very well, you know! Have a break today, just be with the kids, and don't worry about the house or about him. I'm glad to hear you are sticking with the 2 other things, and you will be able to tell how that is the right thing to do by how mad he will get about it - please please don't then let him browbeat you into caving in a for a quiet life!

Chin up, flower. You have come a long way.

anorak · 03/10/2004 11:33

You don't have to prove it. The judge will decide based on what he believes, taking all the facts into consideration. This is not a criminal trial so proof is not necessary.

And what he did to you won't make any difference as to what you receive in settlement either, it will only make a difference in regard to whether or not he sees the kids and who is ordered to pay costs.

You don't have to reach a compromise with him. I know your natural instinct is to try and please people and to be chronically fair, etc, but this is not a situation where you are required to concede anything.

Stay strong and don't forget you will have plenty of time to chat with Twinkie and all of us next Saturday, so don't rush into giving any concessions away.

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anorak · 03/10/2004 11:34

And of course JanH is right about being private. Ask any celebrity!

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iota · 03/10/2004 11:57

Hi essbee - sorry to here you're not so good today - think positively - at least the last couple of days have been better - there is light at the end of the tunnel

I had an idea: stop calling him ah in your head and think 'wifebeater' - say it over and over and the next time some 'friend' speaks about him refer to him as "that wifebeater...." They might just take the hint.

hope you have a good day with the kids today

essbee · 03/10/2004 12:55

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anorak · 03/10/2004 13:09

You have been trained to bother. All your life. Don't worry about your feelings and needs, worry about others........know where I'm coming from?

Could you not get a few mortgage quotes by phone. They're always talking about it on TV ads.

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essbee · 03/10/2004 13:13

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tigermoth · 03/10/2004 13:37

Hi essbee. You seem to have been busy. Hang on in there.

re mortgates, get out the yellow pages, phone up some independant mortgage brokers and get them to do the research for you.