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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Original poster

how long have you been a single parent?

311 replies

AMAZINWOMAN · 06/07/2007 19:41

ive been a single parent now for oevr 7 years
i chose to be alone

i cant imagine myself being settled again and sharing the parenting responsibility-its been so long

but i dont want to be alone for the rest of my life! im worried that i will be though as we are very close and for someone to come in our lives it would affect the dynamics

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tortoise · 06/07/2007 19:43

I have been single for 20 months!

My xp2 was abusive to my ds1 and me.

I would like to meet someone special one day and definatly don't want to be alone for ever!

JoMa · 06/07/2007 19:46

I was on my own from being pg with ds1 (now 3.9), then spent 8 months as part of a couple before splitting up with ds2's father.

I'm now on my own with my boys and I much prefer it. It was very difficult to try and fit ds2's father into the life i shared with ds1, and i think that's why it didn't work out.

I would like to have a relationship some day but it will have to be someone very special to make it work

MrsWho · 06/07/2007 19:48

I have been single for 6 years and I feel the same Amazinwoman.

I am contemplating someone atm but can't see it being that serious

bookwormmum · 06/07/2007 19:55

Since Dec 1999!!

mojosmum · 07/07/2007 17:37

ive been single for 6yrs have had afew flings dont think you would call them relationships as i wouldnt let the men get that close for fear if hurting me & dd

again i do want to find someone one day but an happy on my own at the mo.

mojosmum · 07/07/2007 17:37

mean on my own with dd that is

allgonebellyup · 07/07/2007 20:07

4 months so far but can see it getting to 4 decades at this rate! already love being on my own but i do feel sad when i see happy couples holding hands etc and know i will never have that again.

(did just have a rubbish mini-fling with an attached man but he was an absolute a-hole so it didnt last!)

Turquoise · 07/07/2007 20:10

Two and a half years officially alone but was actually pretty much on my own (certainly emotionally, largely physically) for at least the whole of dd's life, and most of ds's - so about eleven years unofficially.

It is hard though - any man who breaks into our world will have to be special beyond belief.

jellyjelly · 09/07/2007 17:05

Have been on my own for just over a year and i do love being on my own.

I have had a couple of 2 month flings but they were never going to go anywhere.

I would really love to have another baby but i know it would be on my terms and i would have to be in control, dont think the guys like that so much. I also dont like sharing my bed now or seeing other peoples stuff in my house.

The though of someone knowing how much or little i spend on food and things and knowing or buying a house with someone scares me.

snowwonder · 09/07/2007 17:10

2 years

i would like to meet someone but worry about everything

and dont really go anywhere to meet anyone, although everyone tells me you meet people in everyday life?????????????????

jellyjelly · 09/07/2007 17:14

Everyone says that to me too but they must be talking to other people because i am not meeting them.

Pinkchampagne · 09/07/2007 17:16

I've been a single parent for 2 months now, and I'm finding it pretty tough.

Haven't started thinking about new relationships just yet...scary thought!

SurferRosa · 09/07/2007 17:17

I guess I was always single really as DS1's dad was involved with someone else, and as soon as he left her, he went off with some other bird. DS1 is 4 so I guess that makes it 4 years.
DS2's dad was an 8 month downhill spiral, culminating in my leaving him when 3 months pregnant...here we are again.

Better alone than with an idiot, but still...

brightwell · 09/07/2007 17:18

I've been a single parent for almost 8 years.

charliecat · 09/07/2007 17:25

I have been single for 6 weeks. Lonely already But thinking that lonely is better than miserable.
Would like a phone full of men to ring for company/laughs/drinks...sadly I dont have.

JoMa · 09/07/2007 17:28

SurferRosa - youu could be me that story is so similar to mine!

Snaf · 09/07/2007 18:04

Just over 3 years.

I'm vaguely (and I do mean vaguely) seeing someone atm but it seems more trouble than it's worth trying to fit a relationship into my life now. I should really knock it on the head, but I quite like the snogging

I suppose the idea of being alone for the rest of my life is a bit grim but as Turq says, the guy would have to be mind-blowingly special - and I just don't think he's out there...

Catnkids · 10/07/2007 21:47

Been on my own (with my kids!) for 8 months now. Find it very lonely but better than being in a lonely marriage (we were married for 15 years).

I'm struggling to get my friends to come out with me on a friday (kids are at their dads) so meeting a fella is going to be almost impossible! Any single mums out there in/near Chester want to go out on a friday night with me????

I would like to be part of a couple again -if only for the company!!- but I'm too hurt at the moment and at the start of a difficult divorce.

sugar34plum · 16/07/2007 16:56

Hi been 4 weeks for me and im miserable as hell. I miss him like crazy. Or rather i miss the man he was his now a spineless pig i dont even know, I have no real friends round here as he was controlling. Basically i have 1 friend. Very sad!

So if anyone is in kent and wants to meet up please say hi to an new single mum who is desperate for a social life again!!

lou33 · 16/07/2007 16:59

nov 05

lou33 · 16/07/2007 17:09

now i have read the thread, can i just add that on saturday i was told by a friend that i might as well give up on finding a new partner, and accept that at my age (40) with 4 kids, noone is going to want to take me on

he added sweetheart on the end to make it sound nicer, but i was quite upset by his comment

PersonalHouseElf · 16/07/2007 17:17

It's been 5 years for me. Xp walked away from ds at 6 months.
I doubt that I'll ever have a serious relationship again, Ds has Autism and my standards/expectations have gone through the roof!
I was seeing someone casually for almost a year but he couldn't accept Ds so I got rid.
I don't mind being alone, I've got a great group of friends but I do miss the intimacy.

sugar34plum · 16/07/2007 17:37

phe. i too have a ds with sn. i have 6 kids in all only 5 at home get me only 5!! )But im only 34 and consider myself attractive and a bloody good catch for anyone! ( modest too )

lou what a dirt bag! i have seen your pics before and your gorgeous and from f & g thread very intelligent. Bet he is a friend that fancies you?

Just looked on a dating. omg scared now. 40 yr olds looking for that special 18 yr old!! What as a friend for their own dc???

lou33 · 16/07/2007 17:42

i hope he isnt thinking that!

lol @ 40 yr olds looking for 18 yr olds, i mean i like younger guys but not if i could have given birth to them

no it's just wrong, but there are lots of teenage boys with mrs robinson syndrome

i have a sn child too, i dont see him as more of an issue than having kids in general tbh, it's just a case of finding the right guy who is worthy of getting to know my family

i think ultimately i probably will end up alone, but blimey i like to think i might have some kind of relationship in the future, my exbf couldnt have been the last surely?

sugar34plum · 16/07/2007 17:47

its not funny my eldest ds is 17!!! And if i thought his mates looked at me like that id clout them one!!!

I know i will have another relationship one day ........................

Violins playing gently in the back ground............