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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

I'm going to get slaughtered for this, I bet

232 replies

satyricon · 02/07/2007 14:01

I'm brand new on the site. I'm not even sure why I'm here, in fact. But the message boards seem so friendly and supportive, so I thought I'd try my question. Bear in mind that I'm a guy and therefore clearly quite dim.

My partner and I split up about 6 months ago. She had miscarried a month or two before and after that, everything changed. She didn't want to be around me, didn't want support or company, just wanted to be alone. Finally she told me she was moving away and she didn't love me any more. It was a terrible experience, and it's taken me a while to come to terms with it. I suspect I might never see her again. Certainly, the last time we spoke, that was how she was feeling. I've tried very hard and I do understand that what she's doing is trying to do is to rub that part of her life out... and that means me.

OK, so that doesn't make me a lone parent. Sorry if this is in the wrong place.

This question's going to sound pretty humdrum after all the stuff I've just said, but her goes. How do you get back into dating and the whole scene? It's been a long time and I'm totally clueless. And what makes it worse is that I was a real social vulture before all this. Going back to the clubs and bars I used to hang out in just seems a little meaningless and dull. Has anyone experienced anything similar? Am I just a bit of a freak?

OP posts:
satyricon · 04/07/2007 12:21

Ah I think I'm just one of those people. People are always saying "don't I know you from somewhere". Although, to be fair, this is the first time it's happened online. Was it my bold use of emoticons that gave me away?

Personally, I've never understood the point of Friends Reunited. I know all the people I want to know from school and university. Do people just use it to see if they can sleep with an ex?

OP posts:
Kewcumber · 04/07/2007 12:26

I met up with an ex from work when I was at the Edinburgh festicval one year. BIG MISTAKE - age had not been kind to either of us .

SurferRosa · 04/07/2007 12:49

Oh you're probably not then. It wasn't the emoticons
He's a writer and lives in London. He's quite articulate but can't spell as well as you so I'm thinking not...

The age is right. Oh we were 18 and 20, we were so sweet...

Why is it that everything went downhill after him?

FlamingTomatoes · 04/07/2007 12:52

Yes people use it to try to sleep with an ex.

One of my ex's tracked me down and sent me a birthday card .. on my birthday... after 10 years.... I split up with him when I was 17.

Ohhh>

Thank GOD he sent it to my mums old address, which then got forwarded to her, because if it had turned up here I'd have called the anti stalky police!

SurferRosa · 04/07/2007 12:52

Btw Friends Reunited is awful. I went to have a look and it's only got the ones you never liked in the first place. I always avoided actual reunions for the same reason. The bitches and the cliques were queueing up to show off...all the nice ugly quiet ones were at home getting on with their real, if un-showoffable lives.

I can't find the people I'm interested in on there.

satyricon · 04/07/2007 13:27

My first "proper" girlfriend was a little older than me... 19 to my 16. Taught me a few things, anyway.

I ran into her the other day. She's married a policeman and they're working on their fourth.

She hasn't aged very well, though.

Surfer... "the ones you're interested in"? Do I sense an as-yet-unfulfilled longing for the boy who sat in front of you in double maths?

OP posts:
SurferRosa · 04/07/2007 13:45

God, actually that's how old we were when we met...mind you I was only just 19...anyway I didn't marry a copper so it can't be you.!

No, the ones I was most curious about were those girls who seemed to have lives that were somehow bigger than school...usually quite unhappy lives it would seem...things not right at home. And they would go out to parties and get drunk and cry with each other in the toilets. While I didn't even know what a 'blow job' was and didn't drink because a)I was scared of being sick and b)my Mum didn't want me to.

They were usually good at drama too. And went out with the arty boys...

It was a girls school anyway except for CDT swapovers. I daresay had there been boys in maths I'd have a much healthier depth of knowledge about life in general.

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