Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone (part 28)

[ninah]

lilac where are you????!

yay for Dd eve

Hey all. I shall have to check this thread more often it moves so quickly. I dont know who you all are, so ill just say happy new year, and thinking of those spending it on their own , like me.

I see from other threads they have to have a nickname. So ill call him filmbuff.

We had a few, maybe 10 texts yestetday, and he checked me out again on match.

Really looking forward to Monday.

Tookool, 10 texts is a good sign

Lou, am right with you on the cannon firing concept ref XH - arse

I did email him back in the end, I just had to:

There is no need for confrontations in any of this. Do not project onto me your view of things and your anger. Your statements below do not represent how I feel and what you feel, is up to you. The only thing that matters is that the girls feel loved and cared for wherever they are and whomever they are with.

I was not inviting you to Leamington but to tea on the Monday in Bxxxxxxxxx, and I had assumed you would get DD2 a gift.

When the children are in my care for their birthdays for example, I will be present as will TLM, since he is an important part of our lives, as is his daughter. The invite to you and DP remains open. In future, I will not presume the same in return if such events coincide with visits to Richmond.

You have made your position perfectly clear. I consider the matter closed

prob a bit pompous but I don't care

MZ, about rejection feelings, Theatreman def worth another go though

SCL I second your wish for the coalition to be out - fortunately they seem to be on a self-distruct path

Eve, yay for DD

Flame, hope you feel a bit brighter this morning (((())))

Hi all
Sorry i haven't been on in ages.Was so busy with christmas and preparing to move been packing etc.

Mily sorry you are having problems with your ex.Mine still wants to have a chat with DG i avoid all exps calls now it is driving me mad listening to him go on.

Elasta Have a nice time tonight.

Flame Glad you may have some company for tonight.Though i have to say i didn't ever really mind being on my own at new year.Once the ds's were in bed i used to watch Jools,order a takeaway and drink too much

I had bad news over christmas.DG and i were all set to move into a new place together in january have paid deposit etc.However,he spent christmas up north with his family and came back to us on 27th.He told me he has been offered a job back home and that if its a better deal obviously he will take it.He finds out details today and has gone back home for a meeting with the manager.He wants me to go with him but realises its a big move after only 3 months together.

I'm so upset i really don't know what to do.I have never felt how i feel about him with anyone else.I saw a future with him and now it may all have to end.I feel like things may change for him if he is back around his family and i don't want to be a burden.

oh Beaut, that is hard , not sure there is a right answer. If you were to forget about the amount of time you have been together and just think about how you could make it work and whether, in doing so, you would be happy, that might help clarify your thoughts.

I am so anal I would write a list of pros and cons and see which was longer!

New Year, new me

Mily Thank you.I think i will do that.My heart says just go for it but my head says no.I just feel if i let him go i will regret it in the long run arrghh.To find out tonight as well of all nights im dreading him coming back as i'm scared about what he will say.

I would go beaut.

Didnt know there was a meet up either, not that it matters as i am still in bed sick. Meant to be eating out tonight as well. Dp is off today and looking after me. He hasnt got to go back til tues so will be off for my birthday. Not that i feel up to celebrating atm

Lou Hope you feel better soon.We are all supposed to be eating out tonight.I'm being selfish but i really don't want to get dumped at new year not that any time would be good.

Hi all

wishing you all a happy new year and Lou, hope you're feeling better soon ...

Sadly I'm feeling worse than I've felt for a long time and really not sure why ... but know that I can't be doing with this sort of emotional turmoil in my and my children's lives. I don't really understand why I'm feeling so bereft - it's unexpected and in many ways unwarranted but atm I'm at a loss as to how to get myself back on an even keel where though I may bemoan the lack of any fia men at least I'm not feeling this despair. Ideas on a postcard/kick up the backside/suggestions welcome ...

Hi MZD, I feel for you, That awful feeling of let down that you have met someone you like and it just doesnt work out can leave you feeling worse than if you just trundled along on your own. I feel similar, having recently met someone who seemed really keen and who has now dropped me like a hot brick

New year is a particularly hard time for us lone parents as it rubs in that there is no one special who cares about us.

Can only suggest being kind to yourself and in time the feeling will wear off. Give yourself some treats, concentrate on doing things you like and keep moving forward.

It will get better

Hi Elasta - and ta for your message. Agree with much of what you say - I've been (largely) fine on my own for six years and think I had just forgotten how crap being rejected can make you feel.

Wouldn't mind but this is a guy who persisted in asking for a meet-up for the best part of three years, sent me an email three years ago to try to persuade me that he was a decent honest bloke who would never do anything to hurt me, texted me the day after our date to say how much he'd enjoyed it, chatted on FB to say he really liked me etc, said he'd be in touch ... and then zilch ... de nada ... sweet f a.

To be honest, I don't know if he's telling me something or just feels that because it's only been one date combined with the distance, that he doesn't have to be in touch ...

I'd thought of sending him a Happy New Year text but not sure it's such a good idea.

Oh bleugh, I'm getting sick of myself now! Wish I could just get into my bed, pull the covers up and forget the whole world for a while!

Hi MZD i think many feel the same as you at this time of year.I dread my big talk with DG tonight as he has said he will never hurt me and nobody wants to be rejected do they.I'm sure things will get better for you.Send the text if it will make you feel better if he doesn't reply then he isn't worth it anyway.

i would send the text too mz, he could be feeling nervous perhaps? ((()))

Sorry for everyone's problems. Worse at this time of year I think.

Quick question, have been asked on date by someone else who also seems nice, maybe not so much of s click, but you don't really know till you meet do you.

He's asked if I want to meet up and walk the dogs. I have one and so does he. I said yes, but now wonder if that is safe. Or would it be ok if we went to a public park.

go go go!! but do go to public park ,tell a rl friend where you are going and have them call you for 'emergency call' as get-out clause if you need one - you could always cancel and get them to call later if you wish

Right, kick up the arse time from me.

Mz pull yourself together, it was one date. You will have forgotten him this time next week. I hope so anyway. I know how disappointed you felt, I too have jumped in with both feet a couple of times that I have actually met a FIA man, as it's such a shock!

Beaut, I wouldn't go with him, you haven't known him long enough to be making life changing decisions on his behalf. If he had been really committed he wouldn't want to be moving up north, sorry. Hope tonight brings you the answers you want but if not, however painful, try not to let him know how devasted you are feeling. I wouldn't uproot DC's for something that might not work out.

Elasta, he's not worth feeling upset over. You have had an awful year and need to be kind to yourself.

Now it's new year and it takes everyone in different ways, as you can see it has resulted in a personality transplant for me.

Toold, you cannot tell until you have met. Walk the dogs together just make sure it's in a public park and not dark alleys, depends on the type of dog you have, if it's a Rottweiller and he has a poodle you might be ok

what's fia man?

'Tools' not Toold.

Fit, interesting and available.

eve - ouch but thanks ... I think

and have sent text anyway as idiot

MZ, lol. Absolutely nothing wrong with sending a new year text and keeping in touch if you both feel like it but just don't dwell. I'm a firm believer in 'if it's meant to be' and all that. Hope you get a reply.

I'm still in touch with a few men that I've met, one I really fell for before this thread started. I got over him fairly quickly and we chat and email occasionally. He was meant to be moving here for a while before he went volunteering abroad but DD hated in the intrusion and I had to put her first.