support thread for people who find it hard as LPs...

[simpson]

just wondering if this has been done before...

I have 2 Dcs (2 & 5) and am bringing them up by myself (H allowed to have phone contact only due to his fuck wittery {I love that phrase })

Sometimes its soooo hard doing it by myself

DS had parents evening today and although his comments from teachers were fab most all of the other parents were couples.

Sometimes it hits me that I have to do everything myself

They start at 5yrs 9mths but DS will have to wait till sept after he is 6 due to school holidays etc....

Have put his friend down on list too so they will start together.

Then starts the problem with what to do with DD when I pick him up at 8.15 as she will be sleeping

Hello ladies! How are we all?

Today i found out that XP may be homeless in a couple of months.Considering we talked of him moving in with me in the past,i can't help feeling just a little pleased that he may well be buggered.. Shouldn'tve been such a twat,eh?

I know it's bad form to be pleased at others 'misfortune',but i reckon i'm just a little bit entitled to laugh!

HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gawd.. I shall simply never catch up...

Hope all are keeping OK

Terribly sorry for disappearing, its just lifes been CHAOS the past couple of months... and I've barely had time to take a breath..

Apparently this is 'my' year.

quick rundown... got it (back) together with the lovely T first week of January.. and since then everything has just sort of fitted into place, like a jigsaw - this is the man I almost left my exotherhalf for 2 1/2 years ago so its harly a flash in the pan, sudden, adolescent fumbling of an affair IYSWIM...

Him and the boys get on like a house on fire, heartbreakingly at times he's better with them then their own dad... but there you go..

and whilst it might seem terribly soon it just feels entirely RIGHT and erm.. as of May (when he has to move out of his current house - shares it with a friend - who now wants to live with her partner - fair enough)I'll be co-habiting.. which is exciting and terrifying..

there again,given my life has gone from jaded cynical sarcastic single, to far too happy, and very much in love over the past 2 months, well y'know, it feels right, and you only actually live once...

so yes..alls well here - I endeavourto popin more often and catch up proper as soon as possible ladies and gents...

so y'all take care. x

Ahh emma, that sounds absolutely lovely!

good to hear from you emma

Ohhhh I have just ben invited to an old works reunion in may

Just got to get a babysitter, but its not till May so I have loads of time

dreading H's call tomorrow

I need to lay it on the line and ask him if he is coming over in april and explain that DS is with him atm the for making no effort...

Wish me luck!!

My mother is even thinking of ringing his mother (the one that sent the bloody t shirt!!) to see if she can lend him the £££ to come over as the chances are he will not have told her about invite .

My parents have paid for the last 3 trips over for H but have refused to do it again (understandably) as they think he is taking the piss out of them

DD is now the one asking questions about her daddy she was watching cbeebies today and it had some kids irish dancing on and she cam running to me vvvv excited "my daddy lives in Ireland"

She can even point Ireland out on the globe "thats where my daddy lives" etc...

At your parents lending him the money!!

I have never ever heard of such a thing,how old is he ????

Good luck for todays' phone call (if it happens).
Get tough simpson..there really is only so much you can do to keep things flowing,if he can't be arsed to make the effort or meet you half way..

You certainly don't want to be doing this for the next 14 years..

well, I am very proud of myself

He called at 5ish and DS refused to talk to him (again) and I did not force him but laid it on the line with H and told him to sort it out re coming over in April and borrow the £££ if need be or say is is definately not coming over which would piss me off but then I would know where DC stand iyswim.

Think it really hit home especially as DS would not talk to him and I told H exactly why DS is with him iyswim. I also said I do not make excuses for him (H) and if DS is angry then I tell him its understandible rather than placating him if that makes sense....DS has a right to be and I want him to know that...

Excellent simpson. Good for you!

Absolutely no point in tip toeing around H, he needs to start taking responsibility and stop pissing your DC around.

exactly!! Fingers X he does come over as i could do with the break

My mum is going to call his mother nxt wk and talk to her too and basically say he needs to step up to the mark etc...

Builder friend is coming over on wed to quote back door, hope its not too much ££££

Have bumped thread ..

simpson et all.. Are you still here??

yep I am here

Nothing much to report though...

H is going to let me know for definate on fri when he calls whether he is coming over to see DC in april.

He may borrow the £££

Don't want to get too excited but if he does come over I will have 2 whole daysto myself However I will have to spend a whole day with H first which will not be fun

still here
nothing to report on the romantic side
what a surprise!
:-)

That's a bit of a price to pay simpson,a whole day with H! no doubt carried out with clenched teeth on your side, but think of the 2 whole days afterwards..

Funny that,BH - I've nothing to report on the lurve front either

Maybe that's because i've spent time literally banging my head on the desk at DS2s Parents' evening...

Plus on the phone to the fraud dept. at XBoxlive,after my DS2s account got hacked,and all his money taken out of his bank account...

Plus wielding a large pointy stick ,to keep the wolves from the door...

Rant over..Onwards ever Onwards ladies,what else can we piggin' well do?

JK - what happened at the parents eve??

DD got her first parents eve at her nursery next wk....

My mum rang MIL who refuss to pay for H to come over as she does not have the £££...

But she wants DC over in Ireland over the summer at some point

Another thing to stress about....

I can't even begin to say..
I have a book full,just taking all my energy to be battling it by myself.

simpson,Will MIL pay for your DC to go over there in the summer,or are you expected to fund that???

yes we will be expected to fund it

DC went over in November (yr before last) did not go last yr as that what just after H's antics (getting arrested on last visit etc)

My parents take them over and it costs them over a thousand to stay in hotel for 4 days and my parents are not together either so its not my mum's idea of fun to spend 4 days with my dad...

Also irish family have not rung once to se how DC are since me and H split (I lie MIL has rung a couple of times but no one else)

Sorry about your parents eve

Why is everything sooooo fucked up

No simps, if they want to see DC surely they should pay for it,it's their turn to fund the contact yes?
Why should your family pay for everything???

Re school...you ask..are you ready?
1 They do not follow the national guidelines re. the report system,if a child misbehaves in class,they get one verbal warning,put on report for a week,and then notify the parents.(Reports are supposed to be to correct consistent poor behaviour, not one incident)They put kids on report at a drop of a hat-like half the class-it means nothing to the pupils at all!

2 All the good experienced teachers are being made redundant,and not replaced.

3 A teacher stated he SAW my son hit another,(he wouldn't)he was put in isolation for the day,noone notified me..then when it turned out someone else did it..noone apologised to my son,is that 'professional' or acting fairly??? The teacher clearly lied,or needs glasses!

4 Every teacher says 'he could do better, if he wasn't distracted so easily', i keep saying is he sitting next to A or B,it turns out he always is,so i keep saying SEPARATE them..They never bother.

5 My son is Dyspraxic,and on School Action Plus..the teachers never ever remember.

6 If you ring the office,they never pass on messages-it can take weeks to speak to a member of staff

I could go on-basically my sons' academic levels are going down at an alarming rate,and they winge on at me..they're the teachers..Sort it out and TEACH!

And breathe.....

I would be fuming at the school

Your poor DS bing blamed for something he did not so and then no apology

Why are they making all the good teachers redundant?? (maybe they are outspoken about things that need to be changed??)

Pissed off for you

H's family basically have no money and see my family as rich which my mum & dad are ok with as long as irish family ring to see how DC are and keep in contact with them etc (which they haven't)

I just feel sorry for the DC's cousins who would probably love to keep in touch with my kids but due to their fuckwit parents (H's sisters) it won't happen.... as they are too young to do it themselves iyswim.

JK.... some battles are not worth fighting. Would you consider looking at a different school?

Oh simpson, what a pickle, to put it mildly!!

Re. the cousin thing - when they're older they will probably keep in touch via Facebook.. i know it's not the same, but that's how my DC and their cousins/half sisters' do it.

boxingHelena- There in lies the rub..The price we pay for living rurally and by the sea, is lack of choice.

Our nearest school is totally Welsh,kids get detentions' for speaking English, even in the playground,i'm not joking!..DS2 is not good at Welsh,and i decided not to send him there as he struggles enough in his first language.English kids have a tough time there.

I did organize private tuition for DS2, with 1 of the good teachers,after she leaves.She is livid with the school.(simpson,you hit the nail on the head,plus experienced teachers cost more)

A possibility is- i rang the little 'local' college,he can go there for GCSEs at 14(Sept 2012 intake)..but the subjects are very limited.The bigger college takes 1 1/4 hours to get to.
HHHMMMM ...

JK - thats how I keep in touch with my cousins

Its just a pity that DC have no cousins here as neither of mybrothers have kids yet iyswim

Found out today that DS's yr1 teacher is leaving his school at the end of the year which is a pity as DS loves him. Its rare to have a male teacher in infant schools but it was exactly what he needed (ie without father figure ) but at least he is seing out the school yr

Does your DS want to do other subjects that the smaller college does not do??

oh dear dunno what to sa
...hemmm is it a god thing to be made to speak/write/study a language only a very little part of the world speak?
Anyway, going back to DS2....let concentrate on the benefit of living by the sea then... No much of an advice

ps (feel lost tonight)

Hello Everyone can I join up please?

I'd like to re-enter LP world.

I'm 40 and have a DS who is 13yo. I've been an LP to him since he was 3mo, until September last year, when I returned from Australia to begin a relationship with a man I had known well for 25 years.

I fell pregnant at a sneeze and I am now 27wks +3days pg with Ex OH's baby and have left the house we lived in (shared house) with my DS, this was on Saturday. I called the police, as I didn't feel safe. DS and I are staying somewhere temporarily and I'm doing everything I can (sometimes loudly), to sort out a home for DS and me + bump.

Anyway, here I am again and looking forward to the future, strange as that may seem. I have had DS as an LP for all of his life. I have survived two bouts of cancer, two surgeries and Radioisotope therapy. Being an LP was really hard. But he is an amazing young man, who makes me so proud every day, and that gives me strength, for the path ahead.

right! I am not moving to Wells than