Child issue

[Lifeislong1]

Hi, gone through a seperation from partner and we have toddler together. I moved out of his property and into mine due to relationship failing. This involved a 25 miles and I didn't tell him about it in advance and as a result he's not happy and .is trying to see child as often as possible and pushing for more access. I currently allow him to seems on every weekends for 8 and overnight once a month. He has pushed forward with mediation and prevented me registering child at nursery.stating PR and saying he could care for child meaning moving towards shared care 50/50.As a result we are heading to court and I wanted to know how the court is likely to look at this, I filed a specific issues order and he counted, I will struggle not having son with me and my solicitor told me to claim DV. Thanks

But he might want 50:50

I want to avoid

Yes we know that

That might just be tough luck. The more you argue the less reasonable and interested in putting ds first you appear. Presumably you are used to getting your own way or running away if not.

You are either purposefully avoiding the level headed solutions on here or you genuinely don’t understand anything about this process!

yes Cafcass want a solution that is in the best interests of your child! You are being very selfish and your son will not thank you when he’s older.

There are kids crying out to see their deadbeat dads. You’re deliberately keeping your son from his dad that wants to be involved.

He has the same rights as you and court will give every consideration to 50/50. You would be well to take meditation seriously and think about how that would
work out.

It’s not your decision to make, thankfully

Mediation failed,

Unsurprising if you were this intractable.

I'm not surprised, given your level of intransigence.

Volunteer to try it again. You will get a better outcome by cooperating d negotiating. Court is not a good way to go.

a lawyer has told you to lie, claim abuse that never happened, after you moved a substantial distance away, because you don’t want 50/50 despite him (funnily enough) wanting to see and spend time with his child……… h this is pretty gross and I really do hope the courts see your manipulation and selfishness for what it is

If you do try mediation again, think about what you can do to make 50:50 care work. I know you don’t want that, but that’s likely to be your best outcome so try and work with it, not against it. Show that you can be flexible.

Ex wanted to do mediation further, not in relation to arrangements but to docommunication and co parenting. I felt I had to agree but then pulled out afterwards.

That won’t go well for you in court.

Why are you refusing to engage with your ex?

Why did you pull out when he’s trying to make it work?

I feel as if you don’t quite understand that your son has two parents and the starting point would be 50/50 custody unless there’s a strong reason against this.

If your son adores your ex, why do you want to stand in the way of your son spending 50 percent of his time with him?

(Putting aside your own feelings, which are not relevant here, because court looks at the welfare of the child, not of you.)

Do you have learning or intellectual disabilities we should be aware of? It seems like you're not understanding what's being said.

I think this is an important question.

Reminds me of the thread where the OP was convinced that she would get more money from her ex and wouldn’t listen to anyone saying otherwise.

She was capable of comprehending what was being said, she just refused to accept it. This person, it's as if she's having a separate conversation to the rest of us and not able to read anything that's been written.

Fair point. Both feel like we're just banging our heads against the wall.

The bottom line is the person who this decision is being made about is the child and it will be to decide their best interests and to protect their right to have a relationship with their father.

There will clearly be issues around practicality etc but the OP will end up constrained by a Court Order.

The more they engage the more likley they will be to get an order that meets their reasonable needs.

At the moment it will simply be imposed upon them.

I don't like this kaffkas involvement and what they seem to be doing.