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DS damaged a car but owner grabbed him

314 replies

OliveTree75 · 23/05/2025 22:00

So at around 5pm I got a call from my 12yo DS who was playing out. He was crying and said I would need to come to the park as he dropped his scooter and it has hit a car. He was very upset. A woman then came on the phone and said whilst he was apologetic that I would need to come down to her house.
My DP went down and looked at the damage. Very small dint where handle has hit the car. Annoying but he said we would pay. When they got home, DS was visibly very upset. I asked him to explain what happened and he told me:
He dropped his scooter and it hit the car and he panicked. Him and his friends looked around
but nobody there (residential area) and didn’t know which house car belonged to. He started to walk up the street. The man from
tne house then came out and shouted at him
to come back, which he did. He said he was apologising and started to cry. The woman has then gone up to him, grabbed him by his back pack and pulled him back to her house. He said he asked her to get off him.
Now this is not just me saying this as he’s my ds but he’s the softest, most gentle boy and he did not give them any abuse and came back when asked. Whether or not this was the corrext thing to do, I went back to the house and asked her to explain. They completely agreed with his story that they shouted and he came back but they were worried he would run so she grabbed his bag and kept hold of him until a parent arrived. I explained that he is 12 years old and having a man shouting at him and a women dragging him is not acceptable when he was apologising, crying and was walking back
to them. She tried to say I was only complaining to get out of paying but I explained we’ve already said we will pay and the car is not what I have an issue with. I explained that my ds is grounded and we will be paying for the car. However I am very angry she dragged my 12yo ds. Is her behaviour out of line or am I overreacting?
She also accused him of criminal damage but she even said herself it was an accident.

OP posts:
MusicMakesItAllBetter · 03/06/2025 12:17

Velmy · 02/06/2025 02:43

Weird time to quote a post from weeks ago, but ok...

What makes me unpleasant?

Suggesting that a child who is genuinely 'traumatised' from being shouted at/having their bag grabbed after damaging property might not have been raised right?

Or suggesting that I wouldn't let an adult try and run away to avoid responsibility in similar circumstances?

I think they're both reasonable statements, but happy to hear why you don't.

Not weird, going through some old emails and came across a MN one and thought I'd take a look and here we are.

Putting hands on someone isn't nice especially if the other person isn't being difficult which the son wasn't.
I can totally see why the child was traumatised.
But you go ahead and grip up a child who wasn't being a shit cunt and your granny neighbour and watch them call the police for being attacked.

Knocking a car is one thing.
To place your hands on someone who wasn't being difficult is something else and would more likely have more trouble attached to it than the child who accidentally knocked a car.

OliveTree75 · 06/06/2025 07:12

Just as an update we have received a text from
them saying they took the car to the dealership they got it from and they repaired the dent for free. I am not sure how true that it is but we aren’t being asked for any money.

OP posts:
Flashahah · 06/06/2025 07:13

OliveTree75 · 06/06/2025 07:12

Just as an update we have received a text from
them saying they took the car to the dealership they got it from and they repaired the dent for free. I am not sure how true that it is but we aren’t being asked for any money.

That’s not true! But glad it’s resolved..

Hoardasurass · 06/06/2025 08:51

Have you hurd back from the police yet or been given the cctv footage

MathsMagpie · 06/06/2025 09:49

Fuckers, I’d replying saying you’re pleased they’ve rectified their damage and look forward to receiving the cctv of their full interaction with your son.

pollymere · 06/06/2025 12:38

I had my car hit my a ball. The garage popped it out and refused payment because it took a few seconds. So either the damage was no where near as bad as they were claiming or they're lying!

And them grabbing your son and holding him against his will? What's happening about that?

TheFormidableMrsC · 06/06/2025 13:52

OliveTree75 · 06/06/2025 07:12

Just as an update we have received a text from
them saying they took the car to the dealership they got it from and they repaired the dent for free. I am not sure how true that it is but we aren’t being asked for any money.

This will be because the police have been in touch with them about manhandling your child. She doesn’t want to hand over the footage either.

SirChenjins · 06/06/2025 22:01

OliveTree75 · 06/06/2025 07:12

Just as an update we have received a text from
them saying they took the car to the dealership they got it from and they repaired the dent for free. I am not sure how true that it is but we aren’t being asked for any money.

I’d have been very surprised if they’d pursued you for money, given what they did. Glad it’s sorted.

What’s the update from the police?

Franchisingentrepreneur · 07/06/2025 01:59

Great update @OliveTree75 . It seems like they probably regret manhandling your child and just want to drop whatever happened.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 07/06/2025 04:31

Franchisingentrepreneur · 07/06/2025 01:59

Great update @OliveTree75 . It seems like they probably regret manhandling your child and just want to drop whatever happened.

I don’t think it’s great. I think they’re trying to get out of handing over the CCTV, which makes me wonder how rough they actually were.

cranberryshortcake · 07/06/2025 04:36

Mayflyoff · 23/05/2025 22:13

I'd be asking the police to talk to her. That’s utterly unacceptable.

This.

Don’t pay a penny without her sending you the footage and speaking to the police about her behaviour towards a minor.

cranberryshortcake · 07/06/2025 04:38

OliveTree75 · 06/06/2025 07:12

Just as an update we have received a text from
them saying they took the car to the dealership they got it from and they repaired the dent for free. I am not sure how true that it is but we aren’t being asked for any money.

Speak to the police. She held a minor against his will and dragged him down the street. That’s not nothing.

LimitedBrightSpots · 07/06/2025 04:54

Say that's good news but you would have been willing to pay the reasonable cost of the repairs. And could you have the CCTV footage of their interaction with your child, please?

B1indEye · 07/06/2025 11:42

OliveTree75 · 06/06/2025 07:12

Just as an update we have received a text from
them saying they took the car to the dealership they got it from and they repaired the dent for free. I am not sure how true that it is but we aren’t being asked for any money.

No way did that happen 😁but good that's it been resolved

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