Brother’s actions and inheritance

[Kushiyaki]

I’m not sure what to do about this situation which has blown up since my last surviving parent passed away recently.
Seven years ago, my DD ( asd) inherited some money ( about £100k). For various reasons, I entrusted DB to keep it for her in his account until DD became an adult as my own finances were shaky. I have texts showing that he agreed and that it was DD’s money. Our relationship fell apart during early Covid era and he demanded that I take the money back but I said I couldn’t right now but I would do soon. I also found out that DB was pissed off that he had not been left anything by that person at the time. DB and his DW are both magic circle trained lawyers with huge savings ( worth millions together). I am a lone parent living on DDs DLA basically ( my ex was abusive and fully absent ) and full time carer to DD.
Over the past three years DB and I would text about majorly important things. The lines of communication were open even if the socialising was over.
Fast forward to this year, DB was pissed off about me declining a family invite ( it might have been an olive branch invite but I never wanted to start socialising with them again). Without telling me, DB transferred my DD!s money into our widowed parent’s account electronically, giving neither of us a say. Parent ( terminally ill, elderly) said it was because DB was pissed off about declined invitation and told me to take the money back before they died.
Now I did not feel that DB had the right to do that without my consent so I said that as far as I was concerned, my money was still in their account along with the other hundreds of thousands they have in savings. DDs money was not distinguishable from the rest of their savings but it was sent to an account belonging to parent with nothing else in it. My DDs gift would also have been tax free by this stage.
Now, surviving parent has died and DB is being obnoxious about it, saying it is irrelevant and nothing to do with them and that they will talk to the one other beneficiary about the possibility of them agreeing to me getting it back ( DB and I are co executors).
My questions are:
Can DB actually argue that he had a right to do this to DD’s money without my consent? I wouldn’t have agreed to it and I would have taken it back but he never asked?
can I pursue DB to give the money back from his account. I think it was a really dumb and or mean thing for a lawyer to do
As a co executor, do I really need the permission of the third beneficiary who is not an executor for DD to have ‘her’ money back? I gave emails from parent about the money and wanting to transfer it and it states that the money is DD’s and the amount.
DB is putting pressure on me to resign as co executor. They have all the certificates, bank statements etc and won’t show me anything. There was a weekend of ugly emails where they mocked my DDs disability, my parenting, my lack of finances, not taking responsibility etc and not for the first time. I felt they were gaslighting me because I am actually right.
As executor, could I approach the bank with what I have and ask to be given control over the money? I know DB has applied for probate but I understand that you can sometimes sort things out before it is granted?
I’m really worried for DD’s future as that money was hers, it was tax free and it may be vital to her survival in the future. I worry that DB and SIL Will use it for paying death duties and carry on using their vast savings for their bunch of kids ( all privately educated, luxury holidays, recently dropped £10k on a Taylor Swift weekend, you get the idea).

@Stopbeingawalkoverandwalk ,

‘Everyone going on about benefit fraud, IHT, depriving the ex of community assets etc - none of that matters wrt the question of the legal ownership of that £100k. Yes, the OP may have a case to answer regarding those things, but none of that justifies the money being kept from the person who actually owns it .’

I am not a lawyer but, fundamentally, I agree with what you say.

Isn’t the original giver’s intention in question here, though? If I wanted to give 100k to a relative, I would either set up a proper trust or, at the very least, open a bank account in their name with an adult as co-signatory, not just give the money to the mother and drop her a brief text saying ‘here’s 100k for Jemima’.

Wasn’t this maybe a gift to the OP who was going through a tricky divorce, but with the intention that it couldn’t get into the settlement? Or, maybe intended to help her OP look after her daughter while still a child, but not to help the daughter’s father with the same.

I think a court would have to look hard at the intention. Does the daughter know about her missing 100k? If she did, she would have a reasonable claim against the OP for giving her gift to someone else to look after.

Were you trying to keep your savings under a certain amount and realised that children's savings can affect benefits?

You need to get a suitable trust set up for your db to put the money into, it will only take a few days to get it all sorted, not 7 years. You need to start with apologies for leaving it so long to your brother

The money has always been in trust since it was gifted. Initially held in trust by the brother and latterly by the relative in whose account the monies were held.

It could be that op was just being ignorant rather than trying to hide the money. I would report him. In any case, op needs to get a solicitor on board pdq.

No they don’t if the money is clearly her daughter’s and the arrange constituted a constructive trust, but those are things OP should be mindful of should she decide to pursue it.

I’m making no comment on whether she should or shouldn’t, that’s entirely up to her, I’m saying she should be aware of the potential repercussions of her course of action (whatever it may be).

I think what you did was really silly. You should have held this money and you should have passed it to DD when she reached age. Now you’re probably going to spend considerable sums on legal advice to untangle this mess. And what about tax on the intrest has that been declared?

There is a lot of misinformation on this thread @Kushiyaki . Take a look at @LibertyStars posts.

I'm not sure what the point is in berating the OP when what she needs now is sensible advice to sort out this mess in the interests of a disabled young person. This is Legal Matters, not AIBU.

What may be needed here, IMHO, is the creation of a Disabled Person's Trust for DD's gift and the seven years of accrued interest to be paid in to. This could have been done seven years ago to avoid all these issues. You can be a Trustee of this and it will not be taken into consideration with DD's benefits nor your own. The money can then be gradually used in DD's best interests over the years ahead.
Trusts and inheritance | Disability charity Scope UK

I have not read the thread only saw that OP's DB is a magic circle solicitor.

If OP's DB acted in any way dishonestly or fraudulently, without integrity or in any way brings the legal profession into disrepute, he should be very careful because OP can report him to the Solicitors Regulation Authority who are hot in investigating.

I dont think the OP will be reporting her DB tbh.

Will open up a can of worms and she will have some serious explaining to do as to why she seeminghly hid this money and refused to have it back.

Contents removed: a PP has explained it better than me.

So your db tried to give you the money back over the 'covid era' but you refused. I'm guessing you refused to give him any account details which is why he eventually transferred it into your parent's empty account. Poor db just wanted rid of it.

This is your fault. You cannot blame him.

The money must have been your inheritance and not your daughters. If it had been your daughter’s inheritance it would have been paid into an account in their name

Did you receive an inheritance and then ask your brother to hold it for you so you could carry on claiming benefits? You probably did have intentions of giving all/most to your daughter but you’ve got it all into a right mess

Rubbish. It's held on trust normally until the child is 18. It can be held in any account they choose, as has happened here.

DLA is not means tested so why would OP have been "fraudulently" claiming it?

You can lodge a claim against the Estate, presumably you have the paper trail. So effectively, the Estate owes your DD £100K. There is a time limit to this though, so you need to get your shit together and put the claim in.

If this is true then you surely had a solicitor advising you on this. But then again, you now claim to be a co-executor and having to turn to social media for advice.

This whole story smells like a week-dead haddock.

After he transferred it to your parent you had another opportunity to take responsibility for it but you decided to be petulant and ignore the issue to probe your point. How unfortunate for your DD that this has clearly backfired (as anyone with an ounce of common sense could have guessed it would)

IANAL but your DB was holding the funds on bare trust for your DD. It sounds as though this was then moved such that the now deceased parent was holding the funds on bare trust for your DD. Therefore it is not part of their Estate and as executors you should either now transfer this to a new trustee or to your DD. Whether you can physically do this, I’m not sure what access you have but I’m fairly certain a court would order this to happen.

The Estate can then be distributed to the beneficiaries. The sale of the property is another matter, and you would need to a court to force the sale if necessary - but this one you really do need a lawyer for.

What a tangle web we weave when first we practice to deceive.

Does your brother have a good relationship with your daughter?

As other’s have said I think he’s been rather poorly treated, but for the sake of your daughter put your big girl pants on and try and mend some sort of relationship with your brother. I assume that your brother doesn’t want to cause your daughter any hardship and perhaps if you humbled yourself a little he may agree to release the money without the need for legal action. For the love of God though have an account set up and ready for your daughter so that this is a quick and easy transaction.

I think your brother has been reasonable up to the point you took advantage. I hope for your daughter’s sake you get her money for her and have learned your lesson about hiding funds for whatever reason (I don’t think I believe the reasons you’ve given here).

Did you not take it because you wouldn’t get benefits if you had the money ??

It sounds like it’s 100% your fault and your daughter is going to lose out now. I hope you can get it sorted for her sake.

So you're on benefits and were worried that having such a huge sum of money in your account would put an end to those benefits. You decided to keep that money in your brother's account. He stupidly agreed and later realised that that may be illegal and may be complicit in your fraud so he insisted you take it back but you refused and he then transferred it elsewhere. This is on you I'm afraid. You've likely committed an offence and now need to rely on goodwill to get that money back which you might not. Basically, Karma. I feel sorry for your DD in all of this. The rest of you need to sort your shit out and do things sensibly.

You have had 7 years to sort something.

You need professional advice.

It was foolish of you to transfer this money into your brothers account. If there was nothing in writing you might find the scenarios you have described hard to prove. You need to consult a solicitor for advice.

Was this money transferred in order to conceal it from means testing for benefits

Your brother made it clear he didn't want to be responsible for your daughter's money. You ignored his wishes to take the money back. So don't feel you can blame your brother.

You could have put £50k in premium bonds in your daughter's name. The other 50k in an ISA or something. Really it's no excuse saying you don't know about trusts etc. You could have looked into it. Or gone to a bank for advice etc.

He didn't keep your daughter's money and sent it to your parents. So I doubt he will take your daughter's money or anything like that.

Maybe now start looking into trusts etc for your daughter's so when you get the money you know what to do with it.

You have done your disabled daughter a great disservice in the way that you have handled, or failed to handle, this gift over a long number of years. Presumably your brother was constantly anticipating that he would be returning it to you and so the money has been left sitting in an easy access account instead of being properly invested where it would grow and provide income to make your daughters life easier. You ignored both his and your parent's attempts to make you take the money back and have created a huge problem of your own making. Even now, you are fixated on everything that you perceive he has done "wrong" rather than taking responsibility to sort this out. His children's education, holidays and Taylor Swift tickets are completely irrelevant to this matter, presumably he has worked hard to pay for all of those things and invested his money wisely, rather than trying to hide it in other peoples accounts.