So, what's it like going from 3-4?

[Zippidydoodah]

I've mentioned on another thread here that we are inexplicably thinking about number 4, from being absolutely adamant that we were done at 3!

Having the third was hard work and led to me having to give up my job. Now youngest is 2, I'm starting to feel more like me, but also broody with it!

Am I mad?! Please tell me what it's like going from 3-4?

Thank you Lost- and can I just say I identify wholeheartedly with your user name!!

Still thinking!

Well I spent a year flip-flopping but as DH said there were more days I wanted it than not. There were defo days where I thought no f!cking way, usually when the three I have we're having a cranky/fighting/tantrumy day (like today but too late now!).

I do think practically speaking 3 is the perfect number, fun but manageable, fit in a rental car (once the giant car seats are gone especially!), bedroom each in our current house etc. But unfortunately/fortunately my heart beat my logical head in this battle!

zipp

babyblabber, am with you on the thinking about 3 being the perfect number - big enough for a bit of chaos without it taking over everything. On the plus side, nobody ever expects me to be on time/tidy house/have free time to help on PTA/capable of coherent conversation. The cutting of large amounts of slack is a definite and much needed upside!

Pahaha- you're not really selling it, Lost!! 😂😂

I think I need to consider it again more carefully when dp is away for work- he goes away a lot, and it's hard work being left holding the babies!!

I know - I am sorry to be the downer on the thread!! I am very pleased that he's here, don't get me wrong but occasionally do think how much more straightforward things could have been. The difference is though that I wasn't broody so it took a big readjustment. Having said that, I was all set for DC3 when he turned up but still found that incredibly hard work - it is hard having children and a baby, especially if you're alone with them a lot (am in the same position).

But I can see that it will be different one day - and there is a part of me that does feel genuinely excited about how the future will
pan out. He is a lovely baby and his siblings adore him - and hopefully that will continue! We are very pleased that he's here and it wouldn't be the same otherwise (although there might be fewer piles of laundry everywhere).

Good luck with whatever you decide - keep us posted!

So we have been discussing it further, and having checked the bank accounts we don't think we can afford a fourth.

Ps Lost- I appreciate the honesty!!

Zippi, we seem to be in the same boat. I have 3dc 6,4,2. Dp works away a lot and up until today i've been planning my free time from september when dc3 starts nursery 2 mornings a week. Watching a newborn baby today has made feel completely broody!!! Im shocked as i have really struggled with the 3. Possibly just coming out of pnd. Both dp and i are prone to anxiety and not the most chilled out pair so i really need to think about it and while dp has mentioned a few times how nice it would be to have another baby, he thinks it would be a bigger gap, the new baby would possibly be left out. I don't know many people with 4dc but would be interesting to hear if they are left out after having the first 3 quite close??

You sound very much like me, working!

We had our older three with a total gap of 3 years 9 months between them and then ds 4 came along just over 8 years later. I worried a lot about him not having a close in age sibling but could in no way have contemplated another - he is very close to his older brothers who in turn are very fond of him and each one of them has a particular thing they do together - at the moment it is playing dodgeball in the garden for 1 , stories for another and Lego for the other.
The early days were hard as I struggled to balance a very unsettled baby with the needs of older children who needed to be in specific places at set times and as my DH works long hours or is often away and we have no family near it all fell to me. Also that feeling of relief when everyone is settled at night never comes as now ds4 is 6 we are living with 16 and 18year olds wanting to be out late. I sometimes think it would have been more manageable to get it all over in one burst but wouldn't change it for the world.

Thank you, pearl! That's part of my dilemma... Another one soon so they're all roughly similar ages, or wait til youngest is in school. But then the oldest would be 9.

My head is saying "God no!! Are you CRAZY?!"

But my heart is saying "another baby to cuddle, another person to love (who would be lucky to have my three as older siblings), another child to nurture and watch grow, another friend and companion for my children.....etc!"

Period is here! So no baby for now!

And.........nope, not a bfp (sorry to disappoint! )

Nope, dp has an appointment next week to ask for the snip.

😶

Wow zippy, how do you feel about that? I don't think I've commented before but was much like you to ing and fro ing and we are now expecting dc4 although am sure this will definitely be our last and dh might consider the snip then...we talked about it after dc3 too. Reading the comments with interest re how the dynamic might change for us...

Well, surf......it feels like the right thing to do.

However, I think we both know that we may or may not go through with it, and this will be the final decider.

Congrats on your pregnancy! How far along are you? How old are your others?

Well good luck whether you go for it or not. Have just found out today we are actually having dc4 and 5!!! Twins! A bit of a shock! But delighted too. Others are 6,5 and 1...

Wow! Twins after already having three is scary!

25+2 with DC4 here

Older three are 3 7 & 8

Eeek! Omg, congratulations!! Twins are amazing. They do run in my family (not loads, but two sets of twins recently born in my generation). This is a possibility, I suppose, as in not getting any younger and don't eggs release faster as you get older (hence two at a time?!)

Congratulations again! Have you told your children?

Congratulations on the twins Surf twice as much fun

Fresh - your dcs are roughly same ages as mine 9, 8 and 4. I'm also 38+2 with no.4

Thank you lovely ladies! Nice to be able to share on these forums before lots of folk in RL know! fresh and especially tsoto you are both close to your new arrivals! All the best zippidy told the oldest two today, thankfully they seem pleased! They have two lots of twins as friends and think this is pretty cool. The youngest, at 1, will remain oblivious until his life is turned upside down I think!!!

I don't feel close to my October due date! Seems ages away especially when people ask me how long is left and I realize it's over three months.
That being said this pregnancy does seem to be going quickly for me I think due to being soooo busy with everyone else!

25+4 today!

October will be here before you know it! I found that my third child's pregnancy just whizzed by as I was so busy!

I hope so!

26+1

Yes snap here, dc3 pregnancy definitely passed quicker...little time to think about it! October sounds soon to me, if these babies arrive in Dec for us then that seems soon having two new babies this year!!! Hope it goes smoothly for you and baby.