A general, friendly, supportive larger family chit-chat thread, anyone?

[Misfitless]

Does anyone on here fancy striking up a general thread, like the one that they have in the one-child families topic?

Preferably not with imaginary cakes and wine and butlers and virtual massages, etc though?

No need to post everyday unless you want to, just a chance to get to share the ups and downs with each other, as and when?

Just a general musing:

As your families grow, do you get a lot of flack by other people (family, friends etc) about the size of your family? Or is it pretty par for the course? In my case, I come from a very Catholic, very European background, and to their minds to leave DD an only is tantamount to neglect. Six kids or so was the norm for my grandparents, extended family. Did that ever factor for your families?

Again, hope it's not a nosey question.

Haven't read the whole thread, but I'd like to join please! I have 4 - 1 boy and 3 girls. 2 singletons and a set of ID twins, ranging from ages 10-4.

I always wanted 4, but my Dh wanted to stop at 3. After our 2nd he decided that 2 was enough for him, and I thought that 3 would be enough for me. Eventually we decided to go for the 3rd and we got twins so I got my 4 after all!

It is a little chaotic at times - we do generally have to be quite organised or things get missed - probably one of my proudest achievements is the fact that my eldest who had his first proper day of P1 on the day my twins were born prematurely by emcs, was at school on time, in the proper uniform, with all his homework done and a packed lunch every day of that P1 year. We had a family member stay with us for the first 4 weeks while myself and the twins were in hospital and then recovering, but after that it was just us with no family support within about 200 miles, and we did it! Some people thought my life was too regimented, but I learned very quickly that if it wasn't things would slip very soon. Having said that - now that they are older we do let things slide more and it's OK - it's easier at the ages they're at now to do that.

I hated pregnancy - was very sick with them all, to the point of losing over half a stone each time. I am happy to stick at 4 and definitely do not want to go through pregnancy again!

OK - have had a lovely read of the thread now. You all sound lovely. Most of my friendship circle have only 2 kids - that seems to be the norm where we have lived so I guess we do stand out a bit with 4. We have a few friends with 3 and a couple with 4 but really not many at all. Everyone knows us wherever we go which I find funny because I don't really think of 4 kids as a lot.

To answer some of the other questions - DH works, I don't. Now that the twins will be going to school after the summer I would like to do something, but it would need to fit in with school days and terms as we have no family anywhere near us and my husband's job just isn't really that flexible to allow him to do school runs etc. I'd like to do something, but would be happy volunteering rather than being in paid employment. (I know what I want to do, but don't want to say in case it outs me as it's quite a specific dream)

We have a 5 bedroom house, but the 5th bedroom is a study - the twins share. The kids bedrooms are huge though so it's grand. If we ever felt we had to split the twins we would lose our study and my eldest would go in there. It's plenty big enough as a double bedroom, but I would be loathe to lose that extra space.

We are living abroad at the minute and driving a Honda Odyssey which I love. I have no idea what we will drive when we get back to the UK - maybe a Discovery or a Q7. I know the Odyssey would seem huge on UK roads, but I do wish you could get them at home - it really is a brilliant car.

Hi, compared to you guys I have small family with just 3. Dd who is 7 and has ASD, DS1 who's 4 and DS2 9 months. Bizarrely, I have the same age gap between mine, almost to the month, than my parents had with their 3.

I go back to work full time in June. I work in London but travel a lot. A bit worried about the logistics with three, love being on mat leave! Have discussed with DH cutting down but he isn't keen. We'll see, at the moment I earn as much as he does.

He wants us to move to a bigger house. We have a small 3 bed end of terrace. The older two share bunk beds, baby is in the small room. When DD will be 10 she will move to the small room and the boys will share. We have a microscopic kitchen, and a lounge diner. Am happy with the bedrooms but would really like an extra reception room.

I love having a baby and although the pregnancy wasn't easy (as well as the hyperemesis and the spd I got diabetes, plus I needed an amnio) and I swore I would never have another at the time, he is so utterly adorable I could be convinced. Except DH is more than done, I am 37 and where we would put another child I don't know!!! So maybe that is why I am so fond of my baby, he is my last.

We have no family nearby, DH drives a Laguna and I a Clio. The age spread means that apart from bunkbeds we needed to change nothing with cars/house.

We are thinking of moving but trying to find somewhere suitable is going to be tricky. The older two go to school out of county, 7 miles away, and there is doubt that DS will get into the boys' school from where we live at the moment.
But we live in a lovely neighbourhood, in a decent sized 4 bedroom house that could be extended, close to transport link and feel very settled here.
We don't have to decide what to do for another couple of years but I do feel the decision is looming over us somewhat.

I can't remember which poster has dcs at different schools but that us too! 3 at different schools the ds at nursery in another location. We are thinking of putting dd3 on list for dd2's school but not for logistical reasons, thats fine. I do find admin from 3/4 different settings hard plus all the extra circ admin.

I've literally dropped dd1 at tumble and will leave in 30 mintues to collect her! I have to take two other littlies with me. Times like these I fantasise about some help nanny/housekeeper

fatswan i'm one of 3 but my gp had 6 and 10 dcs so I think its in my blood!! I find people are more open with their opinions when you have 4.

I am the youngest of 3 and come from a fairly large extended family, however DH is an only child (although half-sisters he never saw or lived with) and had very little family. I always knew I would have more than one even though DH was reluctant for a while (hence the age gaps) then wanted to have as many as possible.

I don't know if it is because I live rurally but most of my friends have 3 or more children and my sister had 5 so people don't tend to be as critical/obvious in their opinion - however when we have been on holiday we have had a few comments.

DH and I both one of three. We thought we'd have 3, but ended up with 4.
Any comments we get are based on the boy-after-three-girls thing although sometimes when we've traveled we've had questions.
South Africa was full of people asking us about travelling with 4 kids!

sosix - the multi-school logistics are insane, aren't they! However, I have light at the end of the tunnel; I can foresee a time in about three years time when two of my children will be at the same school, at least for a couple of years, but by then the oldest will be at uni so everything will be different anyway!

Oh, and wouldn't a housekeeper be lovely!

Can I join. I've got 3 boys age 5, 3 and 21mths and I'm pregnant with number 4.

Just to answer some of the questions:
Always wanted 3 then fell pregnant again completely unplanned/unexpected but it ended in miscarriage. It convinced us we wanted one more and now I'm expecting number 4

Pregnancies: first two were easy, third had complications but all worked out ok. This one I'm a mess, awful sickness, exhausted, backache etc.

Car: 7 seater

House: 3 beds, planning an extension to get a fourth bed.

Work: Both work, OH full time and me 30hrs. He works away a lot so can be hard going sometimes.

Is it chaos - yes but it's great. Most of my friends have 2dc, a few with 3 but I don't know anyone with more.

I am the youngest of 3, with a large extended family on my mother's side (my nannan had 7 pregnancies, 6 children), not very big on my dad's side through. DH his the youngest of 5 also with a large extended family.

Things have been quite bad so far this week DN is doing nothing but cry as she wants to go home to her mum but I just don't feel it puts safe for her there. Finally managed to get in touch with social services yesterday told them what's been going off. But my SIL's social worker is on holiday, so don't know if they are sending someone different out or if they will wait till she is back.

needmore 4th pregnancies are hardcore! Mine was horrendous bit worth it. My little rogue is sitting next to me on the sofa kicking me he had a sleep so i have no idea wheb he'll sleep.

I can't remember much about my 4th pregnancy. Except wanting to give birth from about 35 weeks.
It's all a blur from the previous 6 years of sleep deprivation!

Sorry to hear about your DN disney. She's lucky to have you on her side. This can't be easy. Has this happened before?

Congrats on 4 needmorechocolate

Oh me too please. I have 5 kids the 4 oldest are boys, 16,12,11,7 and 3. 10 months between 2 and 3 and I am still not sure how it happened. I never intentionally wanted a big family but here I am :D We migrated as a family of 6 and ended up a family of 7. Pregnancy and birth with no extended support network was an experience.

We live in a fairly large 4 bed house so although the boys are doubled up they do have a lounge of there own with a sectioned off playroom for my daughter. For me and himself having our own lounge is a much loved luxury as is the en-suite! We only have a bog standard 5 seat car though and I don't drive :o but if we are all going somewhere we would tend to go by train.

I'm on, 7 kids here

*I'm in

fatswan it's always been bad but the incident on Friday was the worst things have ever been this is the first time I have ever felt it necessary to take my niece from the home. My SIL got a new BF just after New year, he isn't IMO some who should be around children (he just got out of prison, takes drugs, and every time I have seen him he has been drink since about 3 in the afternoon). Since SIL got with him the already bad situation has gotten 10x worse.

Afternoon everyone. I've had a really busy day, took dd3 for 2x medical appointments, dropped ds at nursery, dropped dd3 back at school, pick ds up from nursery, picked cats ashes up, popped to tesco then went fir a quick cuppa with friend, now sitting down before I do school run.

How awful disney. Sorry to hear. How old is your niece?

And sorry about your cat sosix. Losing pets is never easy.

Aww, sosix, we got a phone call from the crematorium saying our dog's ashes were back at the clinic too.
Sad times.
I have a cold, so does DH, but I've been tootling along doing my usual daily shit whereas he's been in bed most of the day. Am making him earn his keep now the kids are home and doing homework and music practice.

Hi disney sorry to read about the situation with your niece, she is lucky to have you to look after her.

We have had an eventful afternoon. 11.30 I got a phone call from nursery to say DS2 had fallen and hit his face on a stone, scrapped his face and had a nosebleed. Don't worry he is fine and been cleaned up but would like to come home. After picking him up a decided I should take him to the minor injury unit as the left side of his nose was quite swollen and he said he couldn't feel his nose.

Bascially, they can't tell properly yet because of the swelling but he has a suspected broken nose! It's possible that the swelling is just pushing the nose to the right slightly and that when it susbsides it will go back to normal but it looks worse now that the bruising started. Not that he's bothered and by the time we left the hospital he was back to his chatty self but as he can't wear his glasses he can't see very well.

I'm sure this will be the first of many trips to minor injuries with him.

Is this a thread that one can ask for a bit of advice on as well? I only have 3 as I said upthread, but DD2 and DS are only 11 months apart. They are almost two and almost one. DD1 is 4.

We are struggling a bit with bedtimes atm as there are only 2 of us and 3 of them. Anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do?