BFP after IVF - anyone want to join me in the wait for first scan?

[HopefulllHolly]

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Hi everyone,
I’ve just had our first cycle of IVF and although we had very slim odds of it working (low AMH, low AFC, male factor, which led to only 2 mature eggs which thankfully led to one perfect day 5 blast). We are absolutely amazed and over the moon that it worked despite everything, but I am really struggling with the wait for first scan. I almost feel with infertility (we TTC for 6/7 years) that it does make you anxious and I’m finding the wait to my first scan (6th June) unbearable. I don’t want to seem ungrateful but I really wish I could enjoy it or relax a little but instead I am worrying about miscarriage and things I can’t control. For me this has been the worst bit of IVF so far, and I’d love to just be able to be happy so I don’t look back (if it does work) and wish that I hadn’t been so anxious and scared.

Is anyone else in the same boat who wants to keep me company? 🥹 Or can provide some tips on how to distract myself and cope better? I know there’s nothing I can do to change the outcome and what will be will be, but I don’t think I’ve ever worried so much in my life.

Thank you 🙏

@AnnieStar12 the dipsticks look for several things and test for pH, blood, ketones, glucose, proteins, nitrites and leukocytes. If the latter 2 test positive then is a sign of UTI.

@DippyDuck19 @HopefulllHolly I have had strange bladder sensations in both my previous pregnancies in the early weeks- without it being a UTI. I always describe it like a scraping feeling inside, but it does feel a bit like a UTI so good to check.

We had our first scan today just to rule out ectopic. Embryo is measuring 6 weeks exactly and had a heartbeat. Everything else looked good. I know things can change from scan to scan so still feeling predictably anxious but trying to rest in the good news for today. We booked a follow up scan at 8 weeks, so we’re back into another two week countdown 😂

I think I will self refer to our hospital in the next couple of days. I also feel like I don’t want to “jinx” things @HopefulllHolly so I totally understand, but it won’t change outcome and sometimes it’s helpful to be registered where you are going to need help either way (good or bad). We also will pick a hospital 40 minutes away by car, for us we want to pick somewhere with a really decent NICU if baby needs it and a good adult ICU if something were to happen to me. My last pregnancy was very high risk so it’s reassuring feeling like you’re in the best place and they won’t transfer you or split you up from baby.

Oooh good luck ladies with your upcoming scans!! This week is a big one for many in this group 😊

Just picking up on the self-referral discussion as I'm feeling a bit conflicted about it too. I think I mentioned earlier on that I'm now away in sunny Menorca on holiday for two weeks so my original 7 week scan which should have been on Friday has now been pushed back to 19 June which will be almost 9 weeks. As someone who's had recurrent miscarriage in the past, my plan was to wait until that first scan before doing any self-referrals but now I'm worried that's leaving things a bit late 😕

I'm also conflicted about where to register - similar sentiments to others in that I have a perfectly fine hospital about a 10 min walk from me but then there is something about the sentimentality of going for the same hospital I was born in (UCH!) which would be a good 30/40 mins on the train as well as some others in South London where lots of friends have had their children too. There's almost too much choice in London and I suppose it probably doesn't really matter in the big scheme of things

@Leaf86 That’s kind of it, like a dry scraping/pulling feeling. I’ve had it quite a bit today along with some mild cramping.

Oh amazing on your first scan! So pleased for you being able to hear the heartbeat, what a relief! My scan is at exactly 7 weeks so all being well I’m going to book one at 9 or 10 weeks and potentially another if the 12 weeks is past 12 weeks. I hope I get that far anyway! I don’t know how people do it just waiting for 12 weeks. 😅

Thats true I hadn’t thought about the NICU or ICU. I’ll have a think if everything is ok on the scan. Both hospitals are good though, I probably just need to go for a little tour of both. Thank you!

@SETTC87 Maybe refer yourself before your scan just in case you need to rush back or anything like that, for your own peace of mind. Hope you have a fabulous time away getting all that vitamin d! ☺️

Yeah it’s a tough one deciding! I guess maybe you could go visit a few on your shortlist or speak to your midwife on her thoughts and make a decision? You can always swap hospitals later down the line anyway I think if you change your mind! (From reading on my local areas this is the case and I’m sure it’s common to move)

Oooh, thank you for the advice - didn't really think about/appreciate that yes you could always move if you're not happy or just have a change of mind etc. That takes a bit of the pressure off, will get filling out those forms then this week!

Eeeek, starting to all feel a bit real now 😬😬

@SETTC87 UCH is where I was born too, and is where I have just registered for this pregnancy! Tbh, I would fill in the form before 9 weeks as they like to have you attend your booking appointment before then. I did it online and it's a form that takes about 2 mins to do. I had my last baby at UCH and all I can say is I had both the best of care and the worst of care, I also had my last miscarriage managed there (which btw I had already registered for before miscarrying and they sorted out all the appointment cancellations for me so I didn't need to worry about having registered too soon) . Feel free to ask if you've any questions, but I guess the fact I am going back there again, even though it is not my closest, must say something!

@Leaf86 congrats on the positive scan - did you know you were 6 weeks exactly? I also plan to do scans roughly every 2 weeks until I get past the 12 week mark.

Sorry for not responding to anyone else’s messages. Didn’t get a chance to check in before now and now I have my own concern.

last night I felt crampy and was like this feels like a period. I went to the toilet and when I wiped there was blood. Every time I go to the toilet and wipe there is blood staining the tissues. It is getting more brown though occasionally has brighter red streaks in it. Lots of dark red or brown mucus (sorry tmi!) I am worried.

have messaged my clinic. Waiting to hear back.

@TorrentialHighSeas Hope you’re ok. Light bleeding in early pregnancy is very common. Do you think you could go for a scan at your clinic to check?

@TorrentialHighSeas sorry to hear that must be stressful. How far along are you now? Hoping your clinic offer to scan you, but always go to the EPU if you’re worried x

Do any of you think it’s worth paying out to get private Beta HCG test? I found somewhere that does them for £50, I could go on my way home from work and have results tomorrow.

My IVF clinic don’t do them, I asked the GP and he said they can’t order them and I am pretty sure the hospital I’ve referred myself don’t do them (I’ve been there with early pregnancy issues before and they told me it’s not standard).

So if I want to do it I just need to pay for it at a private blood test place. On the one hand, I think seeing a result that is within a good range will provide me some reassurance, but then again what would I do if I just get an email with a confusing result. Would that just cause more stress as I’m not doing the tests through a clinic who can follow up. So it could possibly end up causing more stress.

Argh, really torn about what to do! Guess I’m just looking for something to tell me everything is okay.

@AnnieStar12 I debated on this too but then decided against it. You’d have to do 2 tests for it actually to be meaningful, and really I’m not sure what you’d get from it. You know you’re pregnant, and it wouldn’t give you much more info.
Definitely have a scan next week if it’ll help calm you though! I didn’t have one because I knew I wouldn’t stop worrying unless I saw it in the right place and heard a heart beat so I waited for the clinic scan, but I get you’ll have anxiety from your previous experience.

I’m sure you are totally fine and I really feel for you as the wait is horrific for the first scan. Stay positive and try and find things to distract yourself. You’ll be totally fine! Hugs xx

Thanks for your hospital advice @AnnieStar12 🙂

On the HCG testing, are you saying your local EPU won't order one? When I was having a chemical pregnancy managed last year, my local EPU did a progesterone and HCG test basically every time I went in as well as scans while they tried to land on actual diagnosis?

@SETTC87 yes that’s correct, I’ve been to my EPU many times over the years and they’ve never done a beta blood. Last year when I was having suspected (later confirmed) miscarriage and I asked for it to be done, the doctor told me they don’t do it as scans are more accurate 🤷‍♀️ I was confused as everyone else online seems to get them, so not sure why my hospital is different. I imagine they’d do it if suspecting an ectopic.

@TorrentialHighSeas sorry you're going through this, can you go to your local EPU? I started bleeding on Friday and went to the EPU. Everything was fine. The nurse said bleeding in early pregnancy is really common. I'm still spotting and it ranges from brown to pink to red but not as much.

@AnnieStar12 I considered a private HCG test but unless you're going to do one 48-72hrs later it doesn't tell you much. My tests were getting darker and had a dye stealer so that gave me a little reassurance. I did book a private early scan instead at 6+1 as I wanted to check it was in the right place.

@AnnieStar12 the clinic told me I was 6 weeks exactly based on my dates, and the embryo measured 6 weeks too.

If you do get an HCG test, I would buy two - one 48 -72 hours after the first so you can see if it’s increasing normally. Once it gets past a certain threshold (1500 I think) it doubles more slowly though. I think it’s a difficult decision - my clinic does them (repeat bloods) until hcg is over 1000 but you can talk to the doctor about interpretation of the results. Without someone to speak to, it could be more anxiety provoking than helpful.

@TorrentialHighSeas sorry you’re going through this worry, I have had a sub chorionic haemotoma and bled brown / red blood before (baby was fine). Hopefully it’s just that or cervix irritation and nothing worse. X

Thanks ladies, I think I’m just having a wobble and looking for something to provide a bit of reassurance that I can cling to. But yeah you’re all right, on balance it’s probs not going to help me doing these extra tests.

Hello ladies!

I absolutely agree that the wait for the scan is worse than the 2WW! Argh!

This is our second FET we had our BFP on the 24/05 and have our scan on 13/06. Our clinic doesn’t do confirmation blood tests. We have previously had 4 ectopics which is what has led us to the IVF journey after having both my tubes removed.

I haven’t really had any symptoms which hasn’t helped, only thing really is the tiredness, anything I’m convinced it’s real and it’s not just in my head because I’ve read it.

Hope you all have as least stressful waits as possible!

Hey @Vian67 Nice to have you join us and congratulations! Hope it goes quickly to your first scan, how far along are you now? Congratulations!

Weird how no one mentions the wait for the first scan but it’s definitely the most anxiety filled part. I guess because maybe we don’t think as far as getting a positive test (I know I didn’t even consider it, I was so stuck on the process!).

I had symptoms but most have gone now, I’m very tired and have quite vivid dreams and broken sleep from needing a wee constantly. But my other symptoms have gone really. Every few days I’m starving hungry and have felt nauseous because of that but otherwise I feel totally normal, does not help with the anxiety having little symptoms but I suppose we should be happy we aren’t hugging the toilet! 😅

Argh, just got sent my NHS appointments through! 1sy July for my booking appointment, and 24thJuly for my 12 week scan. I just hope sooo much that I make it to those appointments this time! Nice to have them booked in at least.

@Vian67 welcome to the thread. Sorry to hear about 4 ectopics, that sounds tough. Hopefully this will be your lucky one! How far along are you?

@AnnieStar12 exciting! I’m sure you’ll make it. How are you feeling today? I hope you’re less anxious today! I find my anxiety goes in waves, but for the last couple of days I’ve been very peaceful and relaxed. ☺️

Low level anxiety always there, just learning to live with it! You must be sooo excited, less than 24 hours till your first scan!! Will you be able to sleep tonight?

@AnnieStar12 Anxious but at the same time I’ve kind of accepted that no scan, test or anything I do will change anything. So I just have to relax and take it as it comes. I think I’ve worried so much about worse case scenarios that I’m quite prepared, would obviously be devastated still if something wasn’t right but I don’t think the shock factor would be there. But I am praying with all my strength that it’s ok. ☺️

@HopefulllHolly You're totally right there is absolutely nothing we can do to change it. And remember the vast majority of pregnancies are totally fine! I'm rooting for your little bean, and hoping very much for some good news from you tomorrow!

I don't think I had realised how effected I was by the miscarriage I had last year until getting pregnant again. One of the reasons I want to go to the EPU next week is because it was at my 6+ scan at the IVF clinic where they gave me the dreaded news of no heartbeat. So the thought of having another scan there - in the same room, on the same bed - makes me feel sick. I've even wondered about cancelling the scan with them altogether, but at least if I've had a scan with the EPU first somehow that feels a bit easier.