FET/IVF July 2023 - Thread 2

[Olivia199]

Right. Sorry I've I missed any of you....!

@10degreessunny
@loulamay
@Lauralozzle
@ASGIRC
@TTCbabyno2in2022
@orchid29
@ttcsolomumtobe
@Walker12
@Bristol1988
@SH998
@Ivfround1
@wtawtaw
@IVFfirsttimer91

@DauntedAF yes first response early result tend to be best for a clear line, I think amazon has some back in stock now, a few people have mentioned the boots early result one as also being quite good. Tentative congratulations!

@SH998 I’m glad your scan went well!

@DauntedAF Tentative congratulations 🎉

I weighed myself today. Dear God, it’s bad. I need to stop eating!!

@DauntedAF the boots own ones are also pink dye. In fact, i think only clear blue have blue dye! All other brands are pink!!

@SH998 AMAZING! And yeah, try and relax now! Theres a little bean with a heartbeat inside!
When are you planning on telling your friends??

I was on one of my group chats this morning, my friend was worried maybe her cat wasnt fixed and might be pregnant... So obviously she asked me how things were going... In the group chat as well!!! I said things are moving along, but nothing to report yet... Im probably gonna be a lot more liberal with telling after the scan, but until then, I dont want to say, in case it doesnt really progress...

@ASGIRC thank you, it was amazing. I already feel a lot more chilled but I’m sure that wouldnt last long lol 😂

Ive told 3 close friends only, one of which went through IVF on her twins years ago. Also my mother knows. I don’t plan on telling the rest of the family and friends until at least 12 weeks. I’ll try to go a little longer but with my big mouth I’m doubtful I’ll get much past that lol.

My brother announced last weekend that they are expecting so the little cousins will be 9 weeks apart, my mothers going to have her hands full 😂

Hope all you ladies are keeping well wherever you are in the process.

@SH998 thats amazing!!! Me, my brother and my cousin are really close in age! Im 10 months older than them... they are 17 hours apart!!! We all grew up together and it was great!!!

Im telling my family next week, after the scan. Its just not feasible to keep it a secret, since we have weekly dinners! The only reason that hasnt happened yet is because it is the summer, and people have been away!

As for friends, again, most are actively ASKING me if Im pregnant yet. The ones that arent will probably only find out much later, whenever I put it on FB.
My big mouth is definitely working against me right now!!

@ASGIRC thank you! The digital one says pregnant too
Just hard to stop the brain rushing to a million worst case scenarios. But yeah very positive signs so trying to be cautiously optimistic

@ASGIRC it is difficult to keep quiet as your so happy and want to shout it from the roof top. I learnt the hard way last time as told lots more then had to message everyone to say I’d had a miscarriage so I think that’s the main reason I’m keeping quiet this time.

Me and my cousins were similar in age and it was brilliant so I’m happy they will be close in age. My niece has requested she has a little brother so she can call him Dave 😂🤦🏼‍♀️

It is difficult to keep quiet when they are used to seeing you out and about socialising and boozing. They will love hearing your news.

@SH998 yeah, that's my fear as well.
I wouldn't message people, but would have to tell them when they asked for updates...
That would be harder than losing the baby, for me. Having to tell people. It would feel like a personal failure, and I'm not very good with those!

So far I have only purposefully told 2 people, but the not drinking has made me have to "confess" to 2 smalls groups of friends.

My baby will have zero other babies close to their age... The "children" in my family are already teens, apart from one cousin who is 11!!

And even with friends, most don't have kids at all. And the ones who do, the youngest kid is already 3!

Why does you nice want a brother named Dave?!?! 😂😂

Agreed it’s so tough not telling absolutely everyone! Especially when 3 of my friends are all pregnant and our babies will all be very close in age. Though one of my friends knows about the bean as I actually met her through the first IVF group I was on here back in feb/March, so it’s been great being able to talk to her about it!

Its actually really cool having made a real life friend through mumsnet, and I’m really excited for our little ones to play together!

@IVFfirsttimer91 that's amazing!!! I have made many lifelong friends from online communities in the past, and it is great!

And it will be great to have friends with babies the same age!! Bit jealous of that! 😂😂

@ASGIRC thats so cool! And I’m sure you will make some friends in the NCT course? Unless they don’t have that in Portugal?

@IVFfirsttimer91 Im sure they do exist. Unsure how popular they are.
But we'll see! I'm not particularly worried! It will be fine!
It would just be nicer to have friends going through the same!

Sorry guys, I totally checked out there a bit. I kept reading everyone's updates and I'm so pleased to see everyone progressing.

To those spotting - I'm in the same boat here and there. I had a slightly heavier episode of spotting and some light cramps Thursday. Feared the worst but it all cleared up. It followed a particularly painful pessery insertion so I think I just bashed it into a very vascular cervix which got a bit pissed off at the intrusion.

I'm nauseous and my boobs hurt. So I'm taking that as a good sign.

The thread is nearly full again, I'll work on starting a new one tomorrow! Please can you pop a quick message, even just a wave, so I can get the names to tag? I ended up missing a bunch last time. I'll endeavour to post a link to the new one again though, just incase!!

I'll be a bit more engaged again now. I just had a few long days at work and a few days with me and my daughter out having adventures and by the time I'm home I'm absolutely shattered. Living for that middle of the day toddler nap. Work days feel exceptionally long without it!

Hope you're all doing well.

Also @ASGIRC - I have a WhatsApp group of 7 of us who all had our IVF babies in the same couple months. This started from a solo mother's by choice Facebook page. We've shared the highs and lows of the past two plus years and it's been beyond invaluable. They're my people and I couldn't do without them and it's absolutely the most honest parenting space I have. We even did a holiday together to butlins and have a centre parks one planned. I know the SMBC page I'm on is a UK only one, but wonder if there's a similar one for Portugal? It may be a really good place to start a group and you may find local people too. You may not be local to them of course but having that support via text is awesome.

Equally happy to start a group/continue a group on here for support as hopefully our little beans will be growing and entering the world at the same time.

@Olivia199 yeah, I joined a SMBC FB group for Portugal, and they had a get together a couple of months ago (which it seems will be a yearly thing).

I also joined a whatsapp group of other April due daters. But I feel a bit disconnected from them. It might change, though! But they arent particularly local to me either.

And yes, I had been thinking that we would need a new thread soon! Obviously I am very much in!

@Olivia199 im in for the new thread too :)

Out of interest when are everyone’s due dates?

@IVFfirsttimer91 mine is on the 5th of April, according to an online FET calculator!

Good to hear from you @Olivia199 and hope you've had a lovely few days with your daughter. I am also now a regular napper! I'm in for the new thread of course.

@IVFfirsttimer91 9th April for me. I still feel so cautious about it all so even typing that feels very strange!

Up stupidly early, feeling a bit nauseus, and my bowel habits have completely changed so I seem to now wake for that at 4/5am... lovely 😂

Tested again this morning. Digital is still saying pregnant and then the clear blue has a line also. But it's still faint, similar to yesterday. So no progression. I was also head in the toilet last night sick from I suspect either a bug My kid had during the week or a dodgy lunch . This can't be good for baby either. My gut tells me tomorrow's news isnt going to be great but out of my control I guess

@DauntedAF try not to worry, the lines don't change much in the early days at all, you probably know but hcg takes around 48hrs to double so I would really try to test every 2 days if you can rather than every day. The digital being pos is a really good sign! Hope the sickness bug passes quickly for you.

@Olivia199 glad to hear all is OK with you, I feel you! I had a nanny nap at 9.30am yesterday morning lol 😂

Count me in to the new thread please.

Due date is 30th March ♥️💙

Hi, I realise I'm massively late in the day to join in this conversation, but I've been following this thread and it's made me feel a lot less alone to read about everyone else going through the same thing.

I had my first round of IVF in July and got my BFP this week - you'd think I'd be ecstatic (we've been TTC for 9 years!) and I am but I'm also just absolutely terrified that something will go wrong! I've been taking daily tests to make sure I'm still pregnant, I spent all of yesterday terrified I was ectopic because of a mild persistent pain in my lower abdomen, I don't know how I'm going to make it through to the first scan!

I've tried talking to my husband about how I feel but he just tells me to try not to worry!

Basically just to say, I know I'm late to the party but is there any way I could be added to the new thread as well as I feel like I need to talk to people who understand what I'm going through right now 😅

Hey @EllieCatMom! Lovely to hear from you! Glad the thread has been a bit of support but of COURSE you're welcome to join us!

I totally get how you feel. I'm a little more relaxed this time, though honestly not much. With my DD I was terrified 24/7. I tried to explain it to a friend by saying it's like having someone you really love in hospital but not being able to contact them to know they're okay. You know they're in there but have no idea whether things are as they should be. They did not get it one bit and it irked me to no end that they just brushed it off as fine. So I feel you! It's all consuming.

Sometimes a little positivity of "everything will be fine!" Is great but I often find it only really helps when it comes from people who genuinely understand the fear of it all. Rather than those who are either ultra chill or the type to do one pregnancy test, say "yay I'm pregnant" and not think about a single thing again.

You sound like you've been through a huge journey with TTC for so long so it's absolutely natural to feel like this. You're in good company here.

Have you got your first scan booked in? I'm counting the days until mine now.

I'll set up the new group in nap time.

@SH998 - 9:30am nap sounds like heaven. I'd absolutely be game for one now. I'm particularly nauseous this morning so quietly waiting for the cyclizine to kick in while DD charges around the house like a loon.

Anyone who ends up really suffering with the nausea/sickness I HIGHLY suggest you don't suffer and get yourselves to the GP for treatment. It's grand.