So there I was getting all organised and excited about the bedding and kitchen items needed. We'd chatted about finances and accommodation choices put in. And thinking about when we drop him off in September and reading about how parents get them at least helped unpacked and settled in the room. And when I mentioned about driving him over and everything fitting in the car and maybe we'd need a roof rack he just nodded. Then he said maybe he could drive his friend over in his car and take his friend's stuff and we could drive his stuff over. We both said no. (Hard enough dealing with one boy's logistics and two would be too much). He just walked off. I feel quite gutted. Basically he doesn't want us there - he just wants to go off with his friend - they are going to the same university. He said I won't need much - just my clothes and computer. I said yes you will there's a big packing list - bedding, kitchen equipment, laundry bag and so on. So just offloading there. It affects us too - him effectively leaving home.
So I know that's the case, he suggested it twice and we said no twice. He was the same when it came to an open day - wanted to go independtly with his friend and didn't want us there. I know at 18, and driving, they are adults, but - it's a transition for us too. And it hurts because we are sacrificing a lot for him to go and we're going to be living on so little to help fund him (obviously I haven't told him that and it's not "pay as you go", but we're doing it out of love and ouch it hurts that he doesn't even want to share that first moment there with us. He just wants to go independently. I could almost accept that, except logistically we will have to go - there is too much stuff. And it'll be harder now knowing he doesn't really want us to. Presumably doesn't want embarrassing parents there. Even though everyone has that.