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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Non student in DDs halls!

202 replies

kittybiscuits · 04/09/2016 10:22

My DD has a place in halls and is moving next week. It was supposed to be a 5 person flat, but her new flatmate visited it this weekend and said it is 6 beds and an adult/non student male has already moved in and left a note saying he will be living there for 8 weeks. I'm not happy about this. She applied on the first day you could apply so it's not a last-minute place for her. Has anyone else encountered this? She thinks it sounds great. I don't.

OP posts:
a7mints · 04/09/2016 17:07

*There is no discipline in halls of residence. It's not a boarding school.

There may be fines/deductions associated with any residential letting a such as a op said like setting off the fire alarm or not leaving the accommodation in a clean state/causing damage.*

Imposing fines is discipline you wally! Furthermore a university would certainly 'discipline' a student for example proven to be harassing or bullying another student or doing drugs in their accommodation

fastdaytears · 04/09/2016 17:22

A fine would be imposed as part of the tenancy agreement so whether or not he's a student isn't relevant.

Calling another MNer a wally is weird! Is that like a personal attack from the olden days?

Harassment or drugs would also be a breach of the tenancy agreement.

Balletgirlmum · 04/09/2016 17:29

Excuse me!

I would say that is a definate personal attack on me.

I made it clear in what circumstances fines could be imposed & fastday has been so good as to clarify even more clearly.

have you ever seen a tenancy agreement?

Summerholsdoingmyheadin · 04/09/2016 17:34

One of the students on my course at uni was in her late thirties and chose to live in halls. Should the other students have been worried or is it okay because she was a woman and also happened to be a student?

Does being a worker and a man make you more of a risk?

What a load of tosh.

BikeRunSki · 04/09/2016 18:12

Is the 8 weeks now and into the future? Or is it coming to an end? It is very common for universities to let out their accommodation over the summer vacation.

CandODad · 04/09/2016 20:12

Balletgirlmum, you consider being called a wally a personal attack? I would consider it a friendly dig at its strongest but certainly not an attack.

But I do agree that you are wrong in saying a fine is not discipline.

Balletgirlmum · 04/09/2016 20:39

I just started to type a long reply but you know what. I can't be bothered.

fastdaytears · 04/09/2016 20:50

If we're saying that a fine is discipline then everyone who lives in rented accommodation can be disciplined by their landlord.

TwentyCups · 04/09/2016 20:52

You do realise there will be people of all ages attending the university as well OP?
At 18 she might even frequent pubs with older male clientele too...

She is an adult living in shared accommodation. If she isn't happy doing this she will need to find another place to live. You don't get to choose who else lived in shared accommodation, which is why some people rent a house with friends/alone instead. Sharing a house is often cheaper than halls anyway and you get a say in who you choose to rent with then too.

Balletgirlmum · 04/09/2016 20:59

Or who stays in a hotel & has to lodge a credit card against sky expenses/damage incurred.

BackforGood · 04/09/2016 20:59

I'm amazed you know so much about what this man does / doesn't do, from a short note which doesn't give his biography Confused
I'm also quite surprised that you then make an enormous leap to him somehow being a danger to your dd, when you are assuming none of the other students could possibly be.

Personally, if he is a bit older, it's the chap I feel sorry for, in a flat full of freshers.

fastdaytears · 04/09/2016 21:00

To be fair Ballet I think there are a fair few people who like been disciplined in hotels...

Balletgirlmum · 04/09/2016 21:01

Ha ha!

CandODad · 04/09/2016 21:17

discipline

the practice of training people to obey rules or a code of behaviour, using punishment to correct disobedience.

So yes, anyone who knows they risk any sort of punishment is being disciplined.

fastdaytears · 04/09/2016 21:21

Right, but the argument was that the pervert Hmm was not subject to the same discipline as the students. The "discipline" in question is the risk of being fined if the tenancy agreement is breached. The university is fining as landlord. So it applies equally to pervert and 18 year old students.

Balletgirlmum · 04/09/2016 21:23

Fast says it all

CandODad · 04/09/2016 21:29

And I never said it didn't, in fact I think you will find it was me that said discipline only happens in those terms in halls in relation to people suggesting this bloke could not be disciplined while in residence (which is all relevant to the thread) so how about, bite me. Or should I feel like that was a personal attack?

fastdaytears · 04/09/2016 21:35

Sorry I really can't follow what you're going on about and I don't want to bite you thanks.

I'm not sure this thread is doing you any good.

Stopyourhavering · 04/09/2016 22:12

Do you know for a fact how old this guy is? -anyone over 25 looks 50 to a naive 18 yr old

HaloHoney · 04/09/2016 22:20

Is the house a shared residence single dwelling? Or is it effectively an HMO?

If he's there in a house share, and not in full time education, he could render them all liable for council tax. 25% single occupancy discount, everyone on the electoral roll liable!

Balletgirlmum · 04/09/2016 22:22

That point was addressed quite a while back halo.

Uni or educational owned or managed halls of residence are exempt from council tax even if there are some non students living there.

Lightbulbon · 04/09/2016 22:42

This thread has put me off halls for my DD.

She'll be 16 or 17 when she goes to uni and I don't want her living with any random person at that age.

Young people are naive and vulnerable, that is why we have halls in the first place!!

Balletgirlmum · 04/09/2016 22:48

As a parent I think it's very different a 16 year old going off than an 18 year old & a lot of students I know who go at that age live in landlady accommodation for at least the first year.

Dd hasn't yet decided whether she wants to go away at 16 or 18 & our decisions will be very different depending which she does.

MatildaOfTuscany · 04/09/2016 22:48

Hmm, things I managed to get up to in first year in my vair nice women's hall in very well thought of academic university:

got very very drunk on numerous occasions;
allowed the entire mountaineering club (all male - it was a long time ago) into my room after hours (we drank cups of tea, sobered up and talked about climbing);
snogged various blokes;
lost my virginity (consensually and enjoyably, I'm glad to say).

Came out the other end unharmed, older, wiser and with a decent degree. Why do some parents feel they need to wrap their children up in cotton wool? You can't do it, and you're probably putting the emphasis on all the wrong things (see my earlier, sadder post on the need to talk to your children about how to set their own boundaries, rahter than giving them a list of "don'ts").

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 04/09/2016 23:08

I don't think the OP is coming back but I hope she is still reading some of these comments.