Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support IV

[lackaDAISYcal]

Well I was suffering last night so went to bed early. So that is another record, a Saturday night without a drink!!! I wonder how long I can keep this up. It is so very, very hard at times. I feel better in the mornings, a bit tired but a different tired. My brain seems to be remembering things a bit quicker. I did a few odd jobs that have been bothering me for months and months so that was good to get them out the way. I am also waking up earlier....Not so sure I like that one much but at least it will mean I have more of the day to get things done in. Hey ho, maybe I will start decluttering. I am also finding that I am losing weight which is excellent. I will let you know what I have lost on Tuesday as it will (hopefully) be a week without a drink by then.

Hello everyone. I am just logging in to say I am actually still booze free a bloody first for me. I am eating like an absolute pig but to get through a friday and saturday night without drink is the worst of the week over for me. I will log back in tommorrow hope everyone else is ok x

well done habitual and MogtheDog I find I sleep less when I'm not drinking, probably becasue the quality of sleep is much better. Just take it one day at a time

gerbra, please keep talking. I did the same as you; posted and then felt bad for still drinking and then lurked, then felt bad about myself and posted....etc, etc for a few months. It's only since I've actually been posting regularly that I've managed to take some positive steps to stopping drinking completely. Remember that no-one here is judging you for drinking or not drinking (look at the thread title), and we would all rather be able to give you support than not . We've all been there after all!

hi to everyone else

Well done Mog!!! That's brilliant

LackaDAISYcal is absolutely right you know. Because I can come on here and "talk" it helps a lot. It means I am talking to others who understand what an achievement it is to go without a drink one night and who will cheer for me when I do. It makes a world of difference. I stopped "talking" last time because I started drinking again and I wish I had stayed and just worked it through on here because I think the gaps inbetween drinking bouts would have got smaller a lot quicker.

habitual, I am wondering whether we are the same person honestly though friday and saturday nigth were the WORST. i was soo twitchy last night especially. Tonight I dont feel so bad, I am even running myself a bath - something I never used to bother with in the evenings anymore, favouring a drink or two (or more) of wine instead)

One day at a time though but I feel in a completely different mindset atm. I just have to remember to ignore the little voice on my shoulder that in a few weeks time says 'its ok, its just one drink' iykwim, because its that that is always my downfall.

I hope you enjoyed your soak in the bath Mog. I nearly gave in tonight. I have had a whiskey and coke sitting in the fridge since I last had a drink. It was one I poured and then decided I had drunk enough so put it in the fridge rather than waste it. Well tonight I took it out and it was freezing cold, I took a sip and then poured it down the sink. I did not want it, I did not need it. I am therefore sitting here now with my pink grapefruit juice instead. And, I feel another early night calling me. You are right though, getting through Friday/Saturday and Sunday without a drink has been hard -BUT WE HAVE DONE IT!

hello, everyone

it's Dinny here, have felt like a namechange, so here we are, after one of our nutty kittens

anyway, I have been away for a week in Cornwall, and before I went I was droning on here about whether I should try and not drink drink the whole time we were away....

anyway, thought I'd update you all:

we stopped at mil's on the way down and I had a couple of glasses of red with dinner, very nice, but didn't feel inclinced to carry on drinking more. thought to myself I had better have a day off the bext day, but as we were having lunch outside a beach bar and the sun was shining I felt I really wanted a shandy. then I said to dh, "poh, let's really just drink high days and holidays so we can drink whatever we like now we're away".

BUT, that night we literally all went down with a bug! both kids, me and dh have been vomiting all week, upset tummies etc!! made the best of it, the kids were not too bad but I have barely been able to eat all week and even now the THOUGHT of alcohol makes me want to puke!

so, must have been a sign, hey?

back on the wagon for me, till the next holidays!

how's everyone doing today?

sillytilly, sorry your hols have been so pukey, but well done for staying off the drink pretty much. mtd and habitual, you guys are doing so so so so well. I too would have the weekend jitters...i drink every day but know that I can do without it during the week but would find the weekends extremely hard. Specially now I'm a mum and have so little time to myself, the weekend evening drink feels like so much more special....so you are completely my heroes.

I am drinking tonight, but much more measured than I have been. it's been awful of late, just pouring it down my throat. but i have had a couple of really bad nights with it, i can't even begin to tell you coz i'm so ashamed (could relate to what gerbrajess was saying about only lurking coz of the shame) and so am really taking it easy tonight. Anyway, well done all, and hi Kokeshi, hope you're okay. How's your neighbour with the smoke inhalation?

Hang in there all, will post tomorrow.

Sorry, course, not your neighbour, your friend with her drunken neighbour...wot a twit!

Sillytilly - sorry to hear that your holiday went tits up, but well done on the sober front.

Cubby and gerbra, please don't either of you not post because you don't think you're doing well. I've been backwards and forwards with trying to stay sober over the past year and haven't known what to post because I felt so ashamed and demoralised, and also frightened that I'd be had a go at. I have to keep reminding myself that I post here for support, and not to please anyone else or prove anything. Everyone here posts for the same reasons. It's like an AA meeting really - sorry non-AAers - we're all supporting each other, regardless of what stage we're at.

Hope you both keep posting, along with all the other regulars and anyone else that wants to join in.

Have read really supportive words from everyone - Brassic, Daisy and others - thank you!
I'm (fairly) pissed again and I wanted to lay off the thread as a) I was always pissed (in the evening) and b) because I did feel that I'd posted too much (have a bit of a worry/paranoia issue!).

Had to post cos I couldn't resist saying: Habitual - yay!! Daisy - yay! Sillytilly - yay! (I know you were ill, but believe me, I've worked through that problem in order to have a glass of wine MogtheDog - yay! Cubby - yay! (less is more!)

Everyone's done so incredibly well...an inspiration for me actually...

Keep going guys!
Gerbra x

Do I win the prize for the most number of exclamation marks in one post? (should have previewed that maybe...)

Gerbra, you're exclamation marks are endearing. Just keep posting

Thanks Daisy, for starting this new thread and also for reminding me to look up at the thread title and reassure myself that I'm still welcome here, regardless of how well I'm doing. Gerbra and Cubby - LOOK UP!!!

I meant *your. I'm off to bed...

Morning all.

I woke this morning feeling terrible. Don't know why but I feel like I have done 5 rounds with a boxer. I also went out for dinner last night with DH and the LOS and I did the driving, which makes a huge change. It was nothing special, a beefeater type place. But, it must be because I am starting to struggle now that I ate loads and loads. I was losing weight these past few days but it is slowly piling back on again. Got to get a grip. I have spent since last May losing 2.7stone and I don't want to pile that back on again.

Does anyone know how long it takes for alcohol to get out of your body, to detoxify, if that's the right word? I wanted to know how long it possible took my liver to recover because, after drinking spirits for over 10 years, it must be in pretty poor shape and I don't want to go to the GP for any tests as that would flag up to them that I think I have a drinking problem if you see what I mean.

Gerbra and Cubby I was the same as you. I started on here a few months ago and then just lurked because I felt I had failed. It is not a question of failure because of having a drink. Every time you try to stop it gets easier. I totally, if I am honest, expect a relapse at some stage. I cannot believe I can go over 10 years drinking heavily at every opportunity and then not drink anymore. I just have to learn to be in control of it now, to realise that I can have a drink but to limit what I drink. I am waffling again..... This is not easy, it is breaking habits and habits have a way of being engrained in your brain. Hence why I chose the name Habitual. I'm also reading the "No diet, diet" not for the weightloss as such but for the way they encourage you to break habits.

Hi Brassicmonkey and sillytilly.

Well I have waffled long enough, better take myself off to work.

Well done you guys. Habitual, you are doing so well. I've been a heavy spirits drinker for about 17 years, but had lft blood tests done recently and they were okay, so I don't know, maybe it differs from person to person, and also there are perhaps other more complex alcohol related blood tests that might tell a different story. (I have taken milkthistle and artichoke supplements on and off for quite a while as they are both supposed to be excellent at de-toxing the liver). I know what you mean about the driving. I am the only driver (until very recently dh bought a plastic pig - 3 wheeler thing!! 'nother story!!!) and so have avoided family stuff at night times, or 'had' to come home early or whatever, so as to get my quota of drink in.

Brassic, you are doing so well, even if there have been hiccups along the way. The fact that we all keep trying is a very good thing. I am determined to get a grip on this, a day at a time. I drank loads less last night than I have been, over a longer period and in a more measured way...don't know if that makes sense to anyone else but for me it is good. Jerbrajess, I know we can at the very least cut down if we just keep posting and being honest. What's your drink? Mine has been gin (lots) and tonic (tiny bit!!!) and averaging 1/2 bottle a night. But that has crept up in the last few weeks, plus I have been more tired, so have perhaps drunk the same amount but in a much shorter time and then crashed into bed. Not good, specially when I have a little one in the next door room and an incapacitated dh downstairs! Can't quite bring myself to tell you the worst in the last couple of days, but suffice to say, it has really made me examine myself and my behaviour and habits, and I am really, really determined to get myself/keep myself under control. If you want to join me, Gerbrajess or anyone else for that matter, feel free. I've made myself a promise to post on here at least once a night, and before i have a drink, in the hopes that it will help me to break the 8pm, ds in bed, must have a drink habit. We'll see......

Hey cubbie, hi everyone!
Brassic and Daisy have persuaded me to keep posting - thanks guys!!

Brassic - I wasn't sure if you were drinking or not drinking at the moment? If you have been and are managing to cut down/abstain, well done!

Everyone's positive stories have given me real motivation to keep trying.

My tipple is white wine, but failing that whiskey and coke and, actually, if there's no wine in...I'm not fussy
I can easily drink a bottle a night (wine not whiskey) - or rather if I drink, it will never be less than a bottle.

Am planning a sober Monday tonight. This is very hard as DP has quite a few bottles of wine in. I know I shouldn't try with temptation all around but I don't want to wait until he's finished them to try - perhaps that's a good sign?

Well done Cubby for cutting down - I'll check in tonight to see how you're getting on...(probably won't be til later in the evening). Good luck everyone else who's trying / thinking about trying to cut down...

Gerbra x

. I'm glad I can help and that you are going to keep posting. It's nice to be able to pass the helpful words on iyswim!

gerbra, is your DP supportrive of you cutting down/stopping? Can you ask him to remove the wine for a bit? When I was struggling, I made sure that there wasn't any wine in the house. The hard spirits I could take or leave (or at least stop at one), but if there was wine or port, then I would just drink it.

BM, it's good to see you back with us again, if I haven't told you that already

I'm having a very bad day today. Hormones/morning sickness/depression is all a bit too much. I think if I had wine in I would drink it, pregnant or no

Hi Daisy - poor you...I know it's no consolation when you're wanting a drink...but it would make you feel worse if you did . Hope you can find something to make you feel better.

I'm shamefully bailing tonight before I've even tried. I know I'm making it too hard for myself. There's wine in the house but moreso because I gave up a rather heavy smoking habit today!

Very embarrassing to admit I am WAS a smoker, but even I can see trying to survive night No. 1 without either crutch would be a disaster - I'd be at the all-night shop buying fags and booze at midnight!

Kokeshi - how are you? I remember you saying that you were advised to quit the habits in the order they will kill you - this is a possible conundrum!

(God what an attractive picture I paint in writing - fag and booze hag )

Anyhoo, I'm feeling pretty good about not smoking and have patches and gum at the ready...will tackle the drinking when I've got a handle on fag-free living. I will start reducing the amount I drink gradually this week though...the quest begins to reclaim my life!

Hope everyone's well...
Gerbra x

oh, gerbra, you're not making life easy for yourself trying to give up smoking and drinking at the same time.

I gave up a 20 a day habit about two years ago (also when I was pregnant..there has to be cheaper ways of kicking habits surely ) so I know how hard that one is. I used to knit like a demon when trying to stop, anything to keep my hands busy. It works for booze as well though

I've managed to eat something and feel much better, even though I threw up most of it straight afterwards. How we ever survived as a species long enough to evolve I just don't know; if our cavewomen forebears felt like this they'd be easy pickings for any stray sabre-tooth tiger!

Hi Folks, apologies for not posting for a while, real life got in the way .

It is great to see all our posters again, please don't isolate yourself when you feel you are 'failing'. It's during these times that we need the most support and have to lean on others, and also learn so much about what leads us to relapse back into old patterns. Let's see if we can share wee tips and strategies and encourage each other, because the element of denial creeps in all too easily when drink is in the equation.

Cubby thanks for asking about my pal. She's OK but really traumatised by the whole experience, she tried to walk upstairs to her falt and had a full blown panic attack. We all pitched in and moved all her stuff though (including fitting a couch into the back of our campervan and humphing it up 3 flights of stairs!).

It really brought it home to me just how dangerous excessive drinking is: and the fact that the drunk woman who nealry died could well have been me at one point in time. The melted TV and burnt out sofa sitting at the the door of the close was really shocking.

Anyhoo, back to the thread. Habitual, I've been thinking about you and hope you're feeling a bit better. I would definitely urge you to seek some kind of support with this, drinking spirits excessivley every day isn't just a bad habit, it's an addiction and has to be taken seriously. I'm not saying this to frighten anyone, I've had too much experience of trying to do it by myself without any kind of support to think otherwise. This is a huge lifestyle change and you need help, don't be afraid to ask for it.

There are infinite problems to excessive drinking. Most people think it's only the liver that's affected but that's just not true. Every major organ in the body is damaged by drink even if LFTs are 'normal'. It's not in our natures to take care of oursleves, but it's really important to start as soon as we have a clear head. tackling our problem initially takes a huge amount of effort, but it's the maintenance of sobriety - living life on life's terms - that will present the challenges. For that we need to call on others.

Gerbra, definitely don't put too much pressure on yourself with trying to do too many things at once. Yes, I did say that deal with your addictions in the oder that they'll kill you, and only you can decide which one is more likely to do that.

Keep posting guys.

Sorry am in tears, there has been an awful fall out here between dh and best mate, all very messy and horrible, and am really upset. Think I ended up making it worse, and feel awful and sick about it. Am still posting pre drink, but it will be a miracle if i don't fall head first into the nearest bottle, and not even attempt to head for the surface. Sorry I haven't asked about anyone else, will try and post again later if things calm down.

I am really pissed off with my mother tonight. She knows I am not drinking but at 3pm she tried to encourage me to go to the pub and then at 5pm said did I want her to fetch wine from the co-op for me Then when i said 'no thanks' she said 'what not even if its cava?' (my poison of choice) God I would so love a nice cold glass of cava. i am so pissed off

and by the way I was reading my local newspaper this weekend and a young mum of 2 (40) was found dead at her home. The post mortem showed she had some degree of liver disease that 'could' have caused her sudden death Iam trying to keep that thjought at themoment whilst my mother tries to tempt me

oh cubby, are you ok? I presume not. Sorry for my rant afterwards

oh and I would have the perfect 'excuse' to drink today as dd's eeg results showed epileptic activity, so she most probably thinks i wanta d rink. I do but fgs
argh

anyway, I havent posted in ages and when i do I rant and moan and am no help