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Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support IV

1000 replies

lackaDAISYcal · 07/04/2008 00:07

Smile
OP posts:
glowwormish · 14/04/2008 19:52

As always I see so much I can relate to. Have managed to get ds off early and am putting off the first drink. I SOOO relate to the 8pm finish line! I am drinking camomile tea at the mo. I find this helps. If I am strong enough to drink this half way through drinking then I don;t wnat anymore alcohol. Have kept myself busy with dd and playing a game and reading this thread but I know I will start soon. But at least I know what can help when I do decide to start stopping.
Daisy-sorry you're feeling bad. I suffered from AND with DD and its not nice. I went on AD's during pg but I kind of regret this (mainly because of the guilt) but gp did say 'what is worse?' high anxiety and depression or AD's at a low dose? I also drank whilst pg (not a lot but enough to make me feel really guilty STILL) I know that you are thinking of the problem raising its head once lo is born, I was exactly the same (with both). I hope I've got the right one Daisy-as I know that I get people muddled up-so I am sorry!
I also am aware of blathering on and not wanting to hog the thread but Gerbra, you don't come across like that. In fact you sound so much like me, its nice to know that its not just me!
A couple of people have posted about how bad their skin is. I felt like I have aged 10 years in just a few! How do you mean your skin is bad? Its not the wrinkles that bother me but the sagging, I just look knackered (thinking about plastic surgery!) I'm wondering if its the drink or just bad luck or stress and kids (or could be everything). Anyway my face is knackered

glowwormish · 14/04/2008 19:58

Sorry cross posted
There are more important things than appearnce, sorry oif oif about your dd's results and koshis neighbour. Feel a bit of a twat now!

sillytilly · 14/04/2008 20:42

hello everyone

Cubby and Fio (is it?), hope you are OK.

Gloworm, I always remember watching some docu about an 40 yo alcoholic who went into rehab and she looked like a different person after just a month of not drinking - about 15 years younger, was amazing.

glowwormish · 14/04/2008 22:07

Have just finished watching a programme about addtiction by Dr Tanya Byron. MMMMmmm didn't say anything I didn;t know about (apart from the equine dubery therapy) but was very interesting. Did anyone see it? Didn't seem to be any new argument.
Anyway hav had my 3 glasses and am kapputt.
Silly tilly-would be nice to think if I gave up drink then I wouldn't be so saggy. It really would be a reason to give up. I really can't see how giving up would have an effect on my appearance but maybe that's a bit of my denial?

gerbrajess · 14/04/2008 22:23

Evening all,
sorry to hear people have had such a rough time tonight - hope you're okay cubby. well done Fiofio (or oifoif?!) for staying strong with all that temptation - that cannot be easy. Story of the 40 year old is quite shocking too.
Seems a bit bad to go from big problems like the above to the state of my skin but... Glowwormish ...I've mentinoed that my skin is terrible on the thread in the past...and it really has been the past few months. More spotty and tired than wrinkled. (OMG - a booze AND fag hag WITH spots and bags under eyes ). Not a pretty sight. Luckily it's been so cold that I could just bury my face in my scarf when out!
For the last few weeks I've been making sure I drink at least 4 pints of water a day and that seems to have really helped. I've go for whole days without looking in a mirror as it's so depressing!
Am drinking tonight but I am nearing the end of day 1 smoke-free so am going to pat myself on the back for that.
Hope tomorrow's a good day for everyone
gerbra x

kokeshi · 14/04/2008 22:26

I've sky plussed it, will watch it later. Glowwormish, giving up drink had a dramatic effect on my appearance, as it does with everyone. Drinking prevents the absorption and promotes depletion of Vitamin B, which is essential for brain and skin function (among others).

I haven't posted any info for a while, on this thread anyway so I'll just back up what I was saying in my previous post about effects of alchol on the body:

Alcohol dependence

Some people who drink frequently or in large quantities can become addicted to alcohol. Doctors use a number of techniques to diagnose patients with drink problems. They may ask you how much and how often you drink and whether you have "blackouts". You may be asked if you have tried to cut down, whether you feel guilty about your drinking, or whether you have a drink in the morning.

According to the Institute of Alcohol Studies, a person is considered to be dependent on alcohol when they have experienced three or more of the following symptoms during a year.

  • A strong urge to drink, difficulty controlling how much they drink, or difficulty stopping.
  • Physical withdrawal symptoms, such as sweating, shaking, agitation and nausea when they try to reduce drinking.
  • A growing tolerance to alcohol - needing larger quantities to get the same effect.
  • Gradual neglect of other activities.
  • Persistent drinking even though it is obviously causing harm.

Alcohol abuse, or problem drinking, happens when a person is not dependent on alcohol, but is drinking enough to cause themselves actual physical or psychological harm.
Short-term effects

A small amount of alcohol will relax you and make you feel less anxious. But alcohol is a depressant of the central nervous system. In increasing amounts it suppresses the part of your brain that controls judgement, resulting in a loss of inhibitions. It also affects your physical co-ordination, causing blurred vision, slurred speech and loss of balance. Drinking a very large amount at one time (binge drinking) can lead to unconsciousness, coma, and even death. Vomiting while unconscious can lead to death by asphyxiation (suffocation).

Alcohol is involved in a large proportion of fatal road accidents, assaults and incidents of domestic violence.
Long-term effects

Alcohol can be a dangerous drug. Drinking too much too often will cause physical damage, increase the risk of getting some diseases, and make other diseases worse. Excessive drinking over time is associated with:

  • hepatitis and cirrhosis of the liver
  • gastritis (inflammation of the stomach lining) or pancreatitis (inflammation of the pancreas)
  • high blood pressure (which can lead to stroke)
  • certain types of cancer, including mouth and throat
  • damage to the brain
  • heart failure
  • neurological problems such as epilepsy
  • certain types of vitamin deficiency

Excessive drinking has also been linked to:

  • obesity
  • sexual problems
  • infertility
  • muscle disease
  • skin problems

Alcohol and pregnancy

Women who drink heavily during pregnancy are at risk of having babies with a condition called fetal alcohol syndrome. This can result in growth deficiencies, nervous system problems, lowered intelligence, and facial abnormalities in the child. It is also called fetal alcohol spectrum disorder - all the symptoms are not always present and can vary in how serious they are.

There is some evidence that pregnant women who drink 10 to 15 units a week are more likely to have underweight babies. It is not known if there is an absolutely safe limit for drinking during pregnancy, but research indicates that it may be wise to avoid alcohol altogether.

Psychological effects

Although alcohol initially makes people feel relaxed, long term excessive use can ultimately increase anxiety and cause depression. It is also related to problems with sleeping, mood-swings, violence and suicide (about two-thirds of suicide attempts are thought to involve alcohol).
Cutting down

If you think you're drinking too much, keep a "drinking diary", noting how much alcohol you drink each week. It will reveal whether you are drinking within safe guidelines and help you identify the situations that you need to avoid to cut down your drinking.

Below are some tips to help you cut down.

  • Go out later, so you start drinking later.
  • Replace your "usual" drink with one containing less alcohol.
  • Skip the "quick drink" at lunchtime or after work.
  • Have at least two alcohol-free days a week.
  • Do something other than going to the pub.
  • Drink more slowly or have non-alcoholic drinks between alcoholic ones.
  • Buy beers and wines with lower alcohol content, and keep a supply of non-alcoholic drinks at home.
  • Set yourself a limit of, for example three to four units (men) or two to three (women) for any one occasion.
  • Find other ways to relax.

Stopping drinking

Cutting down may not be enough if you are alcohol dependent. Confidential advice and support is available through your GP, and may involve a community alcohol team or specialist consultant care. There are also organisations such as Alcohol Concern and Alcoholics Anonymous that help many people (see below).

Treatment

When someone heavily dependent on alcohol stops drinking (detoxification), they sometimes get withdrawal symptoms. These include headaches, nausea, sweating, and tremors. Sometimes more serious symptoms like confusion, paranoia, and having fits or hallucinations can occur.

To prevent withdrawal symptoms, a chronic heavy drinker may be prescribed medication such as diazepam (eg Valium) or chlordiazepoxide for a few days after stopping drinking.

Below are some examples of other drug treatments that are sometimes used to help people dependent on alcohol.

  • Disulfiram causes very unpleasant effects if even a small amount of alcohol is consumed. Patients are told that they cannot drink at all when taking this drug. Consuming large amounts of alcohol can occasionally lead to arrhythmias, low blood pressure and collapse. It is prescribed under specialist supervision.
  • Acamprosate influences transmitters in the brain to reduce alcohol cravings. It is prescribed to people after detoxification. It may cause side-effects such as headache, diarrhoea and rash.
  • Naltrexone is a drug used to treat people addicted to opioids such as heroine. It is sometimes prescribed by specialists to reduce the chances of a relapse in alcohol dependent people who have stopped drinking. People with chronic alcohol dependence are often malnourished, and vitamin supplements are essential.
jellibabe · 14/04/2008 23:19

Be unable to post anything lately. Only been able to give my computer deep and meaningful lookings until kids go to bed by which time I'm to tired to do anything.

I am still sober. Habitual my eating feels a bit out of control too and have been waking up in the morning feeling as if my muscles have siezed. Have had mood swings (elation & anger) and burst of either extreme activity or tiredness. Emotionally it's as if part of my brain is being switched back on.

Struggled last Thursday with strong cravings. I was ironing (favourite time for drinking). Put on my music (another favourite time for drinking). Had to weather these cravings as whilst I am prepared to sacrifice ironing I am not giving up my music. It's funny how associations can trigger cravings. Could not post at all that night because the more I thought about drink the more I wanted it. Kokeshi thanks for pointing out it's the obsessing that leads to the cravings. knowing that helped.

It's been so liberating not being controlled by alcohol.

gerbrajess · 14/04/2008 23:38

Nice one Jellibabe - you sound thrilled . It must be very heartening to ride the craving times and come out sober...I'm under no illusions as to how hard that is

Cubby - are you okay? Hope things have managed to quieten down a bit and you've been able to sort everything out...?
gerbra x

jellibabe · 15/04/2008 00:05

Thanks gerbra although I harbour Habitual's sentiment. I am sure I will fall off the wagon at some point and am wondering how I will take it when I do.

PurpleOne · 15/04/2008 02:47

I don't post here much, and it's sure fecing hard to stay sober.

Well done to everyone else. Sorry I don't have much else to offer.

jellibabe · 15/04/2008 07:05

Hello Purple - good to see you. I hope you post even if your not winning against alcohol. It keeps you in touch with the desire/will to beat alcohol x

sillytilly · 15/04/2008 07:46

hi everyone

I've started doing this eating programme of six small proteim-rich meals a day, I think I mentioned on an earlier thread I have suffered eating disorders and feel they are related to alcohol issues.

I think this is something really positive from both angles. kind of feel stable and less mood swingy

maybe this could help anyone trying to abstain? I often found a correlation between eating what I considered unhealthy food and wanting a drink, not sure why - kind of an extentsion of the "sod it" attitude?

oiFoiF · 15/04/2008 07:51

fwiw i managed to ignore my mothers 'drink me' 'drink me' temptations!

I read a book on alcohol addiction a while ago that suggested you take a photo of yourself in your drinking/not trying to cut down state and then one a few months after you had stopped drinking (or controlled)completely. There really is a difference in your skin/appearance/face shape. Maybe we could all do this as a goal?

sillytilly · 15/04/2008 08:15

wow, well done, that must have been hard to do.

good idea about the photo - I'm up for it!

teasle · 15/04/2008 10:50

Hi everyone.
I havn't posted for a while as i've really been struggling, but the main thing is i've stayed sober.

Thanks Kokeshi for always being available and for knowing what to say.

Re- your appearance- I saw some people I hadn't seen for around a year and they all were pretty shocked- in a good way- at how much my appearance has changed. Everyone said I just looked brilliant etc, so yes, it does make a huge difference, and I suppose the more you drink, the more you are bound to look shite.

Jellibabe- you mentioned feeling like part of your brain was being switched back on- thats exactly how I felt- great analogy.

gerbrajess · 15/04/2008 11:07

Hi Teasle - so sorry that you've been struggling but that you've stayed sober. How long has it been since you last had a drink? (tell me if i'm being nosy...).

I have a battle with myself every night around 10pm and the wine always wins. I am on day 2 as a non-smoker though so am going to concentrate on that for the time being...so many things to change/give up!

Seriously though, well done for staying strong...

Off to the dentist shortly - I hate it!

Gerbra x

Flowertop · 15/04/2008 11:13

Teasle how long have you not drunk as it sounds very appealling! I was not going to drink last night and kept myself busy (dh away) had half bottle of white wine in fridge and about 9 decided to have 'just one glass'. The crazy thing is although I was craving a drink I probably could have gone without but I stupidly thought I will have just one. Even when i was drinking the glass I thought that would be it but something happens to your brain and before I knew it I had polished off the whole lot. The good thing is I am becoming so much more aware of how/why I am drinking. It was just interesting that I could not just have one and would have been better off having none. Sorry to babble.
Good to see you back Cubby please let us know if you are ok. Hi BM and Kokeshi. Hi to everyone. It is great to read the posts which I do every day and think it is helping me to consider my drinking much more.
XX

sillytilly · 15/04/2008 11:14

Teasle, you have been so inspiring, sorry to hear you've been struggling but WELL DONE for staying off it!

gerbra, yuk, I have dentist next week - just hate the descaling bit by hygenist, hope yours goes well

and well done for stopping smoking! I do think smoking and drinking do often go hand in hand..

even though I don't smoke any more, as soon as I am out in a pub having a drink, I want one

lackaDAISYcal · 15/04/2008 11:20

purpleone, good to see you, if only very briefly. Keep posting; you know we're here for yoou

teasle, sorry things have been tough, but WELL DONE YOU for staying sober. You should b very pleased with yourself.

oifoif...I'm glad you could resist the temptation, but sorry to hear about your DSs eeg. what happens next? will he have to take medication?

My skin was looking sallow and saggy as well, and always looked worse at the end of a night's drinking than at the start (I suppose the booze relaxes you that much?). It certainly looks a lot better already. I can't wait for the second trimester super glow; it'll hopefully take years off me

sillytilly, I can't remember if we've met before . Hi if we haven't!

OP posts:
dinny · 15/04/2008 11:31

sory, sillytilly is me, back to Dinny now

lackaDAISYcal · 15/04/2008 11:35

ah, now it's clear

OP posts:
BrassicMonkey · 15/04/2008 17:34

Teasle - thanks for sharing that mate. Hope you're feeling stronger now xx

How are things at home today Cubby?

Gerbra, I am drinking again now. I had a good period of sobriety last year, but then picked up again in January and struggled for a month or so before settling (???) into a pattern of dependant drinking again. I've tried not to post about it before now, mostly because I feel ashamed and really can't handle any well-meaning bollockings right now.

I have a therapist now and am going to do an out-patient medical detox in a couple of weeks. I'm stuck somewhere between looking forward to it and completely dreading it. I'm really sick of drink now, but each time I put it down I'm back to it again within a few days and I suffer the withdrawals and then binge and become hysterical. I'm having CBT sessions with my therapist now and she's aware that I'm still drinking and would rather me avoid the big highs and lows of abstinance and binges for now.

Hope everyone else is doing well today. If not then at least we're all here to support each other.

Purpleone, good to see you posting again

BrassicMonkey · 15/04/2008 17:37

Whoops, sorry that reads as if I thought you, Gerbra, would bollock me for drinking. Sorry, that's not what I meant. I wasn't referring to any particular person.

gerbrajess · 15/04/2008 18:36

I didn't read it that way Brassic, I'm far too much of a coward to bollock anyone anyway, even in a well-meaning way!
God things sound tough for you at the moment - am so sorry...but good that you're seeing someone and have the detox programme coming up? I still veer between knowing I need help and convincing myself I can do it on my own.
The fact you say your sick of drink now has got to be a positive sign that you'll break the cycle with some help
I've heard so much positive feedback about CBT - not necessarily for drinking issues though.
Have had a crap day - day 2 as a non-smoker is not a good day for a mammoth dentist appointment. (Dinny it was horrible) Still, haven't smoked, but jaws are a bit sore from all the gum-chewing!

Hope everyone's well. The weather has been beautiful round my way today...

Gerbra x

gerbrajess · 15/04/2008 19:17

Does anyone know if Cubby's okay btw? She seemed really distressed last night...

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