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Do you ever feel like ending it all?

322 replies

ohdear · 05/09/2004 00:39

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ohdear · 05/09/2004 12:27

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twick · 05/09/2004 12:30

ohdear, I don't feel like that much now but I have done in the past and in fact nearly succeeded in taking my life years ago aged 21. I'm very glad now I didn't succeed. Whatever is going on in your life it's better to be alive than dead. And as the daughter of a father who killed himself (when I was 19, partly the reason for my own depression during those years) I have to say you can't as a parent really do this just simply because of the devastation you'd leave behind.

Having said all that, I totally sympathise with how you are feeling. I know the emotions very well and for all the years since my worst period of time I fight against that kind of heavy dark depression coming back. I've taken medication in the past which took the edge off things but didn't really help massively. BUT I have been seeing a psychotherapist for about 6 years now (on the NHS so that shows what a state I was in for them to fork out for that ) and it's been the very best thing I've ever done. It's helped me put things into perspective and understand myself, my past, the way I deal with things now.

I think that if you have a tendency to depression, when things go wrong in your life (and being in debt is a horrible state to be in, I've been there many times and still am though am sort of 'on top' of it now) it's hard to deal with them in the way non-depressed people often can.

Does your partner know you feel like this? Is he able to help at all? What about other family members? (You may have answered these questions earlier, haven't had time to read the whole thread, just your contributions).

If you EVER want to CAT me, please do, I have lots of experience of this both in relation to me, my father and my brother.

Wishing you much love and support xxx

ohdear · 05/09/2004 12:40

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KateandtheGirls · 05/09/2004 12:46

Obvioulsy your life is going through a rough patch, but if you weren't depressed it wouldn't seem as bad. You must be depressed to be feeling the way you are feeling. I still maintain that you need to see your doctor to do something about your medication because it's not working. I also can't believe that you don't need counselling. If you are even considering ending it all you are clearly very depressed and need help.

KateandtheGirls · 05/09/2004 12:46

Obvioulsy your life is going through a rough patch, but if you weren't depressed it wouldn't seem as bad. You must be depressed to be feeling the way you are feeling. I still maintain that you need to see your doctor to do something about your medication because it's not working. I also can't believe that you don't need counselling. If you are even considering ending it all you are clearly very depressed and need help.

twogorgeousboys · 05/09/2004 12:47

Yes I have felt like this.

My Mum killed herself when I was 3 months pregnant with my first child. It was a terrible, terrible shock and I suffered dreadful depression.

However bad it gets ohdear (and I truly understand how bad it can feel), there is no way back from suicide and its impact on loved ones is utterly, utterly devastating.

I know you're not sure about counselling, but I urge you to try it. At times I have loathed going, its another thing to deal with etc, but it has helped me. Also, consider reviewing your medication with your GP, there may be something more suitable and effective for you.

Big hugs to you, hold on in there.

I am going away for a week today, but had to stop and add a message.

ohdear · 05/09/2004 12:48

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twogorgeousboys · 05/09/2004 12:49

Have you told your GP just HOW bad you feel?

ohdear · 05/09/2004 12:49

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twogorgeousboys · 05/09/2004 12:52

Is that because you are worried about admitting it?

ohdear · 05/09/2004 12:52

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KateandtheGirls · 05/09/2004 12:54

You've taken the first step admitting it to us.

Please talk to your doctor.

ohdear · 05/09/2004 12:55

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ohdear · 05/09/2004 12:58

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twogorgeousboys · 05/09/2004 13:03

OK, I understand, I REALLY, REALLY do.

I think you could lay it on the line with your GP without mentioning suicidal thoughts, if you are afraid of saying those words. Please go, I think its the place to start, given how you are feeling.

Another thought - these people are good and they have local groups (totally confidential) that you can link up with:

www.depressionalliance.org

twogorgeousboys · 05/09/2004 13:10

Ohdear, book a double appointment with your GP.

Write down what you want/need to say (I had to do this a lot at one stage because I couldn't speak about how I was feeling without becoming a wreck). When you go in, tell the GP straight away how difficult it has been to summon up the courage to make the appointment. Take your time to explain - they will know you are serious because you have booked extra time to talk.

ohdear · 05/09/2004 13:17

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KateandtheGirls · 05/09/2004 13:20

Medication, ohdear.

ohdear · 05/09/2004 13:23

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twogorgeousboys · 05/09/2004 13:27

They should be able to help by reviewing your medication (there's no point in getting repeat prescriptions of stuff that doesn't seem to help). Plus yes, they should discuss counselling etc with you.

When I was at my worst, I didn't think anyone could help me, what was the point of seeing these people etc. But, my GP was my saviour and very very helpful, mainly because he listened, really listened.

I don't think you have anything to lose by going.

KateandtheGirls · 05/09/2004 13:30

ohdear, what I have been trying to say is that it's obvious that your current medication isn't working properly. You need either a higher dose or a different prescription.

twogorgeousboys · 05/09/2004 13:30

Ohdear, I have to go now (going away for a week).

Depression can make us very defeatist, there's no point in doing things like seeing GP's etc.

Please, please, please go.

KateandtheGirls · 05/09/2004 13:34

For the sake of your children go to see your doctor. You have said that you're not being a great mum right now. If you were on medication that was working you would be a better mum and you would have more energy and motivation to deal with the other issues in your life.

Ohdear, I never felt suicidal but I was depressed a couple of years ago. I wasn't the best mum I could be for my kids either. I saw a phsychiatrist and he helped me get to an effective does of Prozac and it really made a difference. The feeling of lethargy really lessened and I felt like I was able to be productive during the day.

KateandtheGirls · 05/09/2004 13:35

I'm not saying medication is right for everyone with depressive symptoms, but for those as severe as yours ohdear, you really do need something.

ohdear · 05/09/2004 13:39

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