Ok here in all its glorious insanity is the proof of how Greeny has spent her weekend:
Twist And Sprout Baby
To Bean Or Not To Bean
Somewhere Aubergine Rainbow
We Have Peas In Our Time!!!
The Sun'll Come Out To Marrow
When Shall We Three Beet Again
Float Like A Butternut, Sting Like A Pea
It'll All Come Out In The Squash
And Did Those Beet In Ancient Time
It's Been A Chard Day's Night
The Lady Radishes
Some Are Born Grapes, Some Achieve Grapeness, And Others Have Grapeness
Thrust Upon Them
A Friend In Swede Is A Friend Indeed
The Lady's Not For Turnip
Your Cabbage Awaits, My Lady
The sky is darkening like a stain,
Something is going to fall, like rain
And it won't be cauliflowers
Lower Fourth at Celery Towers
Chive Go To Smugglers Top
Iceberg With My Little Eye, Something Beginning With V....
Ask Not For Whom The Kale Curls - It Curls For Thee
I don't really have the words to convey the unhinged manner in which she sent these emails. They were accompanied by comments such as "I laughed so hard thinking this one up that I nearly shat a kidney"
I am meant to be going on holiday with this woman next month