desperate fag quitter! Anyone similar, fancy mutual support group?!

[fionagib]

To my shame it's about my 167th attempt to quit fags... anyone out there trying the same who would like to start a support thingie here where we can rant and vent our frustrations and praise each other? I'm starting tomorrow...

mm and cc, if you'd like to email me your address I'll send you a copy of my first novel, babyface. It might not be your cup of tea but could provide a diversion at least! Sorry but it's the american edition with a v naff cover, as only have a couple of uk ones left...

xx

just a quick one as DS1 is getting into everything at the mo. Thought you might like to know that parents have left now and I managed to avoid puffing. At one mad moment before they left, I rummaged in mum's handbag to nick one . HOW DEGRADING. Felt like a teenager again. That kind of knocked it into my head that this is a very bad drug indeed.

Well, will write later, bye for now!

Ohhh yes please, Fiona that would be lovely, i will have to think of something to send in return. My daughter Tanya LOVES the name Fiona now(with Shrek and all that) and I told her I had a friend on the internet with the name Fiona and she looked at me all gooey eyed and said "Really" she will be soooooo jealous when I say I got a book written by Fiona FROM Fiona!!!!
Thank You Muchly, I will return postage of course.
Back to you Mink, please please please dont give in, you know you dont want to and it will just make you sink into a self pitying low. Get back on your I CAN DO IT Horse and snarl it out.
Your one week in, and I know your not meant to count days but if 9 days ago someone had of said, you could go one week without a fag you would have laughed at them....and YOU HAVE!!!!
Think of your boys xxxxxxx
Easier said than done I know, and even if you do trip into your ashtray, well we will be here for you anyway, but PLEASE DONT. Get busy making our oils up instead.
THATS AN ORDER!!!!!

LOL crossed post Well Done!!!!

Our addiction makes us do horrible things like smoke old butts out of ashtrays and even open up butts to get the baccy to make a teeny weeny roll-up... so good we're free of that. Humiliation? So well summed up mink, and good for you, managing to resist the urge... am v proud of you!! It's gonna get easier now...

cc don't worry about postage or thing to send in return, your support is enough, thank you!! Glad your dd likes my name! (my kids are in glasgow watching shrek right now with dh).

Well im surviving ok here, even if everytime i look at dp hes got a delisious dog end hanging from his lips...id just finished dinner and I looked out of the window and there was a big juicy fat RollUp sitting there and it seemed to get bigger and I thought OMG but I didnt.
I cannot bear the thought of telling you two I ballsed it up, and I do not want to be in the pit of Im smoking but it scares me and I dont want to do this and ...well you know the feeling.
Sitting in a cloud of smoke wishing you desperatly weren't.
Dp took the kids to the video shop and managed to get Shrek 2 for the playstaion for hire, its really well done and my two are glued to it.
Did your kids like the movie, we have a dodgy copy of it here and weve watched it loads.
How you doing Mink?
Round of applause for us all

Hi, I'm back now in slightly better spirits. What a day for craving! It was weird, it just hit me really strongly out of the blue. Up till now, I'd been having the nostalgic cravings each day, but today was a nightmare! I felt all stroppy and pissed off that I couldn't just do what I wanted (which in my mind at the time was to just have 1 fag, but we all know that could lead to much more). I'm not sure that I actually feel much better for not having it - still a bit gloomy that I didn't have one. Isn't it strange how something so silly can affect you so much? You know how you feel drained and sick because you want something so much, well that's how I feel at the mo. Not to worry though because there aren't any around to get my lips around

Glad you guys are okay. Feel a little selfish hogging the day, but thanks so much for your support. You two are the ONLY reason that I made it through today. Guess I'll make some of that oil for myself as well

Did you mail me your addresses yet? Choose from the following withdrawal symptoms the one you think will suit you best: anger, mood swings, depression, nervousness and sheer panic.

fg - i'd love a copy of your book, thank you so much! i'll send my address to you tomorrow.

oh girls, i need to have a shower and go to bed. feel so exhausted. Again, thanks so much for your support, hope that I do the same for you!

oh, cc what is cross-posting? i saw that on another thread and couldn't work it out!

When by the time youve finished writing a bit and pressed post message someone else has beat you too it, in this case I was all trying to get you not to have a fag meanwhile you were typoing that youdd nearly nicked one, but hadnt. Will email you now xx You will be glad tommorow, get some kip and you will be fine!
I call what youve been through today a self imposed tantrum, i think thats courtesy of Allen Carr as well!

Thanks CC, will go to bed now. I think it might be time to visit Allen Carr. I thought I'd read his stuff last time, but in fact it was someone else called Nicole something or other. I actually looked at A.C but I think it was quite expensive(this was in Hong Kong). Will probably go to Waterstones tomorrow. Night night!

well done mink for getting through yesterday!!

came back home last night after a few glasses of wine at a friend's house to see dh smoking in kitchen... I said, god, I so wanna fag... and he said, go on then and held packet out... had to come straight up to bed which seemed really sad as usually we'd sit up late and chat and smoke together. So much of our life is smoking together. I wish he'd give up too, would be so much easier. It's the worst thing, having fags in the house (as am sure you know cc). He hasn't said well done or anything - in fact I think he wants me to smoke!

Have realised that I can get by ok in the day(ish...) It's at night, esp after a few glasses of wine, that I become weak and the cravings go off the scale (hence my crack-up on fri night)

I think this means I have to lay off the wine for a while. What a thought! No fun!!! Am pleased i didn't have one last night but am feeling a bit dismal. Flat, flat, flat. Am working all day today (kids all at dd's nursery which run an after school type thing in summer hols), just need to get head down and stop thinking about it.

Am gonna have to go for a run this eve or do something positive at least.

DOES THIS EVER GO AWAY GIRLS???

It does go away I distinctly remember sitting on my mums sofa thinking my god ive only thought about fags for 10 minutes today, and compared to this constantly in your head thing it was blissful, cant atop, must have coffee, but cheer up...its aggoooooodddd thing your doing.
I said to dp yesterday, you only ever ask me to roll you fags if im not smoking, and you only ever leave them on the table if im not smoking, he said do you think i do it on purpose then, I said i dunno but im just saying...you dont do either of those things if im smoking. Only when im not.

Mink go to the library they probably have it, I have 4 copys of AC and they are all out on loan, I do have a video if thats any use, or a cd rom, would you like me to send either of them to you?

I feel really bad that the kids are in childcare on the last day of their hols (even though I have tons of work to do and just couldn't get through it, have been working loads of late nights cos of summer hols).

And all i can think of is going to the garage for fags. sorry to be such a misery girls.

am trying to remind myself that am also giving up FOR the kids - they hate smoking so much, sam (ds) knew I'd stopped earlier this year and saw fags on table when we were on hol in france - he was horrified and even cried!! I felt so sh@t. I just can't smoke any more, got to keep it out of my life. sorry to be so self obsessed girls! Am really just pouring out thoughts here...

also it's prob silly to feel guilty about childcare as they've only been away from me about 9 days in the whole 7 weeks of summer hols.

ramble ramble... feel very un-gazelle like today!!

AWWW Fiona, you cant go back, imagine how gutted your little boy would be...and you dont want to. You have got through the worst, there is no nicotine in your system, this is the dying wish of the evil weed to get your to wake it up and let it be in control of you again. Fight it! You dont need to smoke, how is it going to help?
Your kids are fine, they are propbably having a great time after spending so mu8ch time with you, go work and get busyxxx

thank you cc. Made me feel better about childcare issue...
do you think your dh is a teeny bit jealous of you stopping?

Actually cc I think what you said in your last post is the thought I'll cling on to from now on -my crucial 'don't do it' thought - sam's face, when he saw the fags, and him whispering to dex in their bedroom in the holiday house, 'I saw cigarettes! But Mum said she's stopped! She lied! She still smokes!'
Gawd, the shame, I wanted to stab myself.

Will get on with some work now! Thanks again cc...

how are you getting on mm? Hope you're having an easier time of it today.

Its passed now Fiona well done another hurdle crossed! I have just had lunch and when Id finished I had to eat half a bag of bombay mix, very strong stuff to shut up the now you need a fag feeling, burnt my taste buds off and now im ok.
MM are you ok? Hope you are, hows your babys? Did the jab have much affect with screaming and sleepless ness etc?
I am going out at 2ish and may not be back for ages, I will be with 2 smokers, so wish me luck...
Dp, I dont think its a jealousy thing, hes seen me try and fail a million times before, I think it must be the thing where they dont want to be the only prat left smoking so they try to encourage others, whether they do it subcoinciously or not i dont know.
Excuse my spelling, good luck for the rest of today, and get the flags out, its a week today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My god feels like a month.

Hi, yes it's been okay so far. I still feel a little odd, like my craving mood hasn't quite dissipated. What's going on?!

Don't feel bad about the childcare fg, kids always have a great time doing different things so I'm sure they're out there enjoying themselves socialising with other kids. Like you said, you've had them for the whole hols, so they've had mega quality time with you! I guess you miss them though? Just type and bring home the bacon

CC, maybe DP is envious that you're going for it and doing the best for your kids? When my mum first found out I smoked, she wasn't really that disappointed I don't think (this is the lady who for a v. long time didn't believe in passive smoking ) and in fact it seemed to me taht she was pleased to have someone to gossip with over coffee. I think the demon weed can often make you selfish. Not that your DP is selfish, just that he probably enjoys your smoking company.

fg, if you can't be self-obsessed here where can you be? Pour your heart out, we don't mind

cc, i'd love to borrow that cd rom thanks, just let me know the postage!

ah, cross posted!

good luck today cc, you can do it. if you can manage dp, you can certainly manage 2 mates! have a good day!

p.s. ds2 was fine thanks, a little grumpy for a bit but no more than his mummy

I know what you mean about strong tatses cc - have just gobbled about seven big fat juicy gherkins (ooer!)

Thank you so much for your kind words today cc and mm. You know how every working mother has a wee kernel of guilt inside her...

Am feeling much better & have just sent off email to get application form for 10k road race in edinbugh on sept 12. May be a wheezing old heiffer but at least it's something to aim for...

Am sure you did fine with your smoking pals cc... and glad you're feeling a bit better mm! speak later & good luck xx

Mink get your address to me asap, or fiona if you have it email it to me then i will get Allen in the post ASAP!

I've just finished cleaning the whole house and I think I have exorcised my faggy demons (for now)! Need to go out sometime soon and replenish the lozenge stock though or else it could be another tantrum!

I will make up those oils tonight after the kiddies are in bed and get them out to you asap. Thanks CC for rushing to my aid!

Fg, you are mad! I think i would kill myself off if i even THOUGHT about 10k. Good for you!!!

what happened to your writing today? are you procrastinating