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Original poster

Smoking while Pregnant... (!!)

367 replies

Lornatoo · 25/07/2006 23:33

Hi Guys. Normally a lurker, wondering if anybody is out there....?
My friend (honest!)is 28 weeks pregnant with her 3rd. She's really worried about her small bump. Measured at 26 weeks with the MW. She also feels really small in comparison with the previous two. She smokes heavily, is not without common sence and is REALLY worried about her unborn baby.
Now, do I NEED to point out the obvious? is it necessary? Any other somkers out there? I just don't know if I should 'put the boot in' when I'm sure she knows the answer.......?

OP posts:
MamaG · 25/07/2006 23:35

are you serious??? Of COURSE you should put the boot in

JellyNump · 25/07/2006 23:41

She needs to stop smoking now! If not for her, for the baby, it apparently damages a babies lungs 7 times more than an adult...I think thats right, there were pics of the effects on a poster in the antenatal ward at the hospital I went to

VeniVidiVickiQV · 25/07/2006 23:43

What have you done to help her with this?

hunkermunker · 25/07/2006 23:45

How is it "putting the boot in"?

Well, I can see how it is if you say "You fucking idiot, no bloody wonder, you smoke like a chimney, you mentalist!"

But saying "Can you get some advice about stopping smoking because it's bound to be having an effect on the baby?" isn't putting the boot in IMO.

hunkermunker · 25/07/2006 23:45

(Although I'd want to say the first, it has to be said, and more besides...)

flutterbee · 25/07/2006 23:46

She will know everything that you tell her and will have been spoken to about it by her midwife on several ocassions. I do not feel their is any need for you to bring this up, doing it could cause her more stress and in turn have a further negative effect on the unborn child.

Before I get jumped on Smoking when pg is disgusting and no one should ever do it.

hunkermunker · 25/07/2006 23:48

She can't be that worried about her baby if she continues to smoke heavily either, I'm afraid.

And yes, I know it's addictive. But fgs.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 25/07/2006 23:48

Yes, smoking is scusting, but if she really is a friend you should be offering her advice or support in giving up, not having a go at her through what is obviously a very worrying and stressful time.

Mind you, ask me another day and I'll say "Tell the stupid bitch to quit the ignorant fecker"

fattiemumma · 25/07/2006 23:50

i am sure that if the bump really was worryingly small the HV would have spoken to her about the fact that she smokes.

to smoke at all during pregnancy is a concern but if she is smoking heavily AND has a smaller than average bump then obviously she needs to sort herself out and stop being so bloody selfish and think of her child for once!

I am sorry if i sound harsh but she has no right to act worried if she still light a ciggerette and puts it in her mouth. no doubt there have been numerous debates over smoking whilst pregnant and there will im sure, be people who come on and argue that smoking is an addiction and she cannot quit...that is fine! but dont get pregnant.

and in answer to your question...yes put the boot in!

Bananaknickers · 25/07/2006 23:52

I smoked when pregnant BEFORE I found out and had my last fag that evening.Its as simple that my baby was more important to me than my need to smoke. I really don't understand people who continue or at least get help

Original poster
Lornatoo · 25/07/2006 23:54

Thanks for your replies all.
I have supported her loads, she's my best pal. I don't approve of smoking while pregnant and have tried to get her to stop. She knows all the facts, she's not daft.
Hunkermunker, I think you're right, I just need to phrase it a certain way.
And flutterbee, you too. I just feel odd, standing back and saying nothing. I know she knows! What more can I say...?

OP posts:
FairyMum · 25/07/2006 23:54

I wouldn't say anything. It's not going to help. She knows and she chooses to smoke. I was a smoker before pregnancy too and I gave up. Of course I did.!

hunkermunker · 25/07/2006 23:56

That probably won't help

Original poster
Lornatoo · 25/07/2006 23:56

me too fairymum, maybe that why I feel in a dilema

OP posts:
flutterbee · 25/07/2006 23:57

OH please don't let this thread turn into one of those "ooohhh all people who smoke are the scum of the earth killing their children evil bitches we hate you all and we are such better mother than you" type threads.

PS. I dont smoke.

hunkermunker · 25/07/2006 23:58

I am a better mother than one who smoked when pregnant though. Because I didn't.

Bite me.

flutterbee · 25/07/2006 23:59

and I'm a better Mum than you because I don't drive so their for I am not killing mine and everyone elses child with my toxic car fumes.

Bite me back.

Bananaknickers · 26/07/2006 00:01

I am a better mother because I don't spend all my time on the internet and ignore my kids and throw them a sausage roll why they sit in their buggy so I can post on here

flutterbee · 26/07/2006 00:01

Anyway off to bed now in my perfect little world where everyone else is bad bad bad and I am sooooooo perfect and superior sometimes it hurts.

flutterbee · 26/07/2006 00:02

Yes you do Bananaknickers I have seen you do it

So not only are you a bad mother but you are a lier too

FairyMum · 26/07/2006 00:02

To smoke when pregnant or around babies and small children is a pretty selfish thing to do. I think that is a fact.

Original poster
Lornatoo · 26/07/2006 00:02

LOL Flutterbee, no that wasnt intended. I did smoke but gave up when I found out I was pregnant. It was easy for me, I was a light smoker. Now Ds1 & Ds2 are 6 & 3 I've started lightly again.
I know its harder for my friend. I've nagged, helped, suggested and moaned to her to give up at the beggining of each of her pregnancies, but to no avail. I just wish I could do more to persued her. I want to support her, not alienate her. Especially now she is worroed about this one.
( I know she's daft, but that doesnt help, does it?)

OP posts:
flutterbee · 26/07/2006 00:04

Yes it is their is no doubt about that fm but their are also lots of things other people do that are very bad for our children.

flutterbee · 26/07/2006 00:04

Yes it is their is no doubt about that fm but their are also lots of things other people do that are very bad for our children.

fattiemumma · 26/07/2006 00:05

im a better mum becasue i dont smoke, nor d i put their mouths to my car's exhaust, nor do they have sausage rolls.

i dont understand why if she alredy has 2 children why does she smoke? has she not bothered giving up for any of them.

sorry but i feel that women who smoke during pregancy are selfish and they take the risk of having a baby will health probs. they certainly have no right to feign concern. if she were that worried she would quit.

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