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Original poster

Smoking while Pregnant... (!!)

367 replies

Lornatoo · 25/07/2006 23:33

Hi Guys. Normally a lurker, wondering if anybody is out there....?
My friend (honest!)is 28 weeks pregnant with her 3rd. She's really worried about her small bump. Measured at 26 weeks with the MW. She also feels really small in comparison with the previous two. She smokes heavily, is not without common sence and is REALLY worried about her unborn baby.
Now, do I NEED to point out the obvious? is it necessary? Any other somkers out there? I just don't know if I should 'put the boot in' when I'm sure she knows the answer.......?

OP posts:
MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 10:39

Er...yes I have smoked. And bullshit? One, I would thank you not to be so bloody rude and two, I am an advanced smoking cessation specialist, and help people stop smoking day in and day out so yes...I am qualified (more than many of you) to put, as I said, my professional opinion. But I can see that as long as people agree with you you're fine...challenge your beliefs and you get defensive.

MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 10:44

And just to add...I was going to add some information which would help any of you who smoke to quit but you know what? Sod you. I can't believe you are so rude and ignorant. I have helped hundreds of people to stop, using nothing other than the psychology behind smoking. Something which could NOT be achieved if smoking was addictive.

whiffy · 27/07/2006 10:49

If I may interrupt the general flow of the thread for a second, maybe Lornatoo you can do something positive like pay for her to see a hypnotherapist or similar? Spending £70 or so doing something beneficial may help more than everyone just sitting round on this thread discussing what a s**t mum she may/may not be and whether people do/do not know what they are talking about.

By the way, Marmaladesun, I have huge respect for the job you do. Can't be much fun.

Loulou000 · 27/07/2006 10:54

This is such a depressing thread. Of course smoking while pregnant is really bad for your baby. What some of you seem not to grasp is that everyone who does it KNOWS how bad it is. This just goes to show not what terrible people they are, but how HARD it is to give up.

It's oh so easy for someone who's not a smoker to point the finger. Some people just love to be able to feel superior. In fact it's easy to find someone you can look down on and disapprove of their behaviour. It's hard to put yourself in their shoes and understand why they might be acting the way that they do.

And I've never read such nonsense about how it's not addictive and it's really easy to give up and it's all in the mind. I know it seems like that when you're a non smoker or if you've managed to give up, but while you're still hooked it warps your mind and is very, very hard to get free of.

Squarer · 27/07/2006 10:58

Be better off buying the Allen Carr book for her friend than hypnotherapy Whiffy.
I do imagine what MarmaladeSun does is good fun as she gets to help people crack the addiction (I think it is an addiction but whatever works to get people stop smoking is great).

Squarer · 27/07/2006 10:59

to stop smoking

Northerner · 27/07/2006 11:02

Blimey an advanced smoking cessation specialist who beleives nicotine is non addictive.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ..........

MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 11:06

Some of you really are damn rude. And I never said it's easy to give up smoking; if you took the time to read my posts you would see that what I am...sorry was...trying to do is help.
But then ignorant people are unable to see or accept other people's opinions if they conflict with their own. If any of you are experts in the subject then go ahead...we can have a 'professional' discussion. But from the stupid tone of some of your posts it would seem like I have stepped into a playground instead.

MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 11:06

Northener....how dare you laugh at me. Stupid stupid woman...

MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 11:08

Squarer...what I do isn't fun exactly, but enormously satisfying. And just for the record...every single one of my clients who leave my consulting room do so agreeing with me that smoking is NOT addictive, when they have come in with the same old same old...I'm addicted therefore I cannot give up.

yorkshirelass79 · 27/07/2006 11:12

Message withdrawn

archiesmummy · 27/07/2006 11:14

Hiya all
It looks like most things have been said already, but I just thought I'd add my opinion aswell. How anyone can smoke when pregnant is beyond me. Sooo selfish and I agreeit's abuse!! Having a baby is a privilage, not a right and if you smoke you are clearly not doing what is best for your baby...
Before anyone says I don't know what I'm talking about, I smoked for 15 years until we decided we were gonna start trying for a baby then I gave up, and it was one of the easiest things I have ever done. Used the smoking ceasation service NHS and I can't recommende them highly enough.

Squarer · 27/07/2006 11:16

Yes, satisfying is probably the word I was looking for... (difficult to think of a job which would actually be "fun" - Bouncy Castle tester perhaps? )

colditz · 27/07/2006 11:21

Marmaladesun, when you point me to trustworthy evidence stating that, against 50 years of research, nicotine is not addictive, I will refute my post that you are talking bullshit.

dejags · 27/07/2006 11:22

it is not difficult.

it is not a choice.

a defenceless foetus should NOT be subjected to it's mother revolting smoke.

I smoked before I fell pregnant with DS1, the day I found out I was pregnant I gave up. It was not difficult - I totally agree with Marmaladesun.

I gave up with pleasure - and will not apologise for feeling angry that any mother would jeapardise (sp?) their pregnancy .

cant understand anybody who would?

Northerner · 27/07/2006 11:23

Chill out Marmalaldesun. Need a fag by any chance?

colditz · 27/07/2006 11:24

I'm not disputing how difficult it is for each individual to quit smoking. Everyone is different.

What I am disputing is whether nicotine is addictive in the first place.

yorkshirelass79 · 27/07/2006 11:24

Message withdrawn

MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 11:25

Yorkshirelass...in my PROFESSIONAL opinion, smoking is a want, not a need. It is a habit, albeit an incredibly strong habit and an extremely hard habit to break without the right help. Even the NHS slogan 'don't give up giving up' suggests failure; it is what we have been led to believe since childhood. The usual methods of stopping smoking address the physical aspects of smoking...when in fact it is the psychological aspects which need addressing and when this is done properly a smoker can (and usually does) quit in a one hour session, no side effects, no cravings, nothing. And I have piles of testimonials in my office to prove this fact.

Northerner · 27/07/2006 11:27

I'm with you Colditz. I agree, many people find it easy to quit, but so many do not. For example my MIL, who, even after a massive heart attack, could not quit because she is so bloody addicted.

So, marmaldesun, I am well within my rights to laught at your 'nicotine is not addictive' line because quite frankly it's the most hysterical thing I've read all year.

So, go on, prove me wrong. Tell me why nicotine is not an addictive subtance, and if it's not then what is it?

MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 11:28

Colditz...I have no desire to conduct any further conversation with you...you are rude and ignorant. I have no problem with a constructive informed discussion, but only ignorant, ill informed and people with no social skills resort to insults.

thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat · 27/07/2006 11:28

Lornatoo - I don;t see the point of discussing here - or with your friend - the dangers of smoking when pg. I think you need to move on from that stage and talk to her about strategies to stop. Give her the credit for wanting to stop (even if its debateable just how committed she is - not relevant for the purposes of you being constructive) - that way you can be suportive, on the same side, helping her. Tackle the issue by assuming she wants to stop. Do some research about ways of stopping, look at the ASH website, NHS direct, get her some hypnotism sessions as an early Christmas present, have a bet with her that she can't do it, tell her you'll take her out for a slap up meal after the baby's born if she does it, buy her a book on stopping, help her decide on a date (tomorrow would be good) - just start thinking about this in terms of practical strategies. get the ball rolling, and be around for her. she needs a kick up the bum and as her best mate you can give it her.

Callisto · 27/07/2006 11:30

I have managed to give up twice - once 10 years ago (subsequently lost the baby so started smoking again) and then when I found I was pregnant with my dd. I went cold turkey both times and had no probs at all bar a few cravings. I gave up drinking alcohol and coffee at the same time because they both exacerbated the cravings (and the morning sickness). So in my humble opinion smoking is more of a psycological addiction than a physical addiction and it seems that the people that 'can't' give up are either lying, lazy or selfish.

southeastastra · 27/07/2006 11:30

Marmaladesun can i come to your session? do you charge alot?

MarmaladeSun · 27/07/2006 11:32

I'm amazed that I post on here with good intentions, and willing to help, and have been shot down in flames. I explained my reasoning at the beginning of my posts, and will not repeat them. But some people spend their lives in little bubbles and can't accept anything differing from the norm. Carry on living in your boxes, while I will carry on my career in dealing with intelligent people and making a very nice living from it too.

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