23rd **TAMOXIFEN** thread

[MaryAnnSingleton]

oh my !

He is very worried about today. I have had to have a very hard talk with him and say I know he hates the rheumie, buit he mustn't just say he is fine because he wants to get out of there he must tell the truth, including explaining what it feels like now, and what it felt like a few days ago. Really shouldn't have to expect a child of 9 to have to make up for the inadequacies of the consultant!

Will make sure you are befriended, so you can see the photos gig.

aw, Nikki dog is lovely - eye looks nice and clean too- bless.
Loads of good thoughts for ds and you at rheumotologist xxx
A tamoxifen trolley load- that's us.

They have done a good job haven't they. I think the hair is coming back white along the scar, so she will have some white eyeliner.....very 1960's

Poor little boy - I know how tempting it was not to say how I felt to my consultants at various time.

Everything crossed for the appt, sparkles. Nikke is looking very gorgeous.

I'm think a wisdom of ladies. . . Although trolley works very well too.

baskets welcome, lovely. Good to see you. Stick with us and we can hold your hand while you're waiting for test results.

smee put the stapler DOWN! Step away from ALL office equipment if you can't be trusted with it. . . Hope not too much oozing this afternoon.

gig sending you super loads of hugs. Feel I've missed out on so much of your suffering tis week. Been thinking about you so much, you brave, brave, lady. I am not at the cancerr centre in London, would have been good to meet up with you there. This was new dedicated cancer ward in Dorchester Hospital in Dorset. Only been open a week, so very shiny!

sparkle loving Nikki Dog pic - labs have such soft ears, don't they? She is beautiful. Loving the ducks too. Everything crossed for DS at rheumie.

aw ned we nearly moved to Dorchester - I took T to look at the middle school next to the hosp.

Tis a very good school MAS! Have caught up on you blog this afternoon - so interesting. Love the civil partnership card - inspired!

What other folk's appointments have I missed? Could anyone be a love and update?
kurri theory test next week, I think?

topsy have you a time scale for your chemo plan?

Gracie* meant to say, well done on getting the second one done- quarter way through is good landmark!

Just trying to gradually get myself up to speed. . .

14k Hope MIL OK today. Thinkng of you lots x x

Have we heard about Onestep and chemo plan? Did I miss that?

Glad topsy and gracie got together for coffee - MAS and I going to plan a meet up soon! Anyone wishing to travel to rural Hampshire most welcome to join us?!

I have missed it too ned

smee are you on your sofa? I don't trust what you are doing with that wound when I can't see you so to speak

gig I think we are definitely right not to trust smee on her own with that wound. . . .

Have stopped oozing and no self inflicted staples required. BCN says the drain had come away from wound. Didn't feel like it as she yanked it out mind... Still, no drain, so yay and yay again. Breasts look a bit like Dr Frankenstein did a bit of dabbling when I was under GA, but not too fussed for now.

Hope little Sparkle's okay. Seems insanely unfair how much he goes through.

Ned, you are lovely trying to keep up. I've been here all week though and I can't, so I'd say sink back into Kurri's slipper and pick up what you can. Think 1step's appt is today though, so hope she's okay. think it might be l4k's too, or have I got that wrong?!

Got two small boys trashing my bedroom mid sock fight atm. Cat's sitting at the door, desperate to join in. Nice to hear so much laughter though.

Well had my results appt and I'm feeling really shocked and angry at the world, don't even really know why. Lump was 6.7cm not 2.5 as shown on scan and 11 out of 21 lymph nodes were affected. I feel sick just typing that. Need ct scan and bone scan. Then the full works, chemo, radio and hormone therapy. Now terrified of scans in case they show anything else. Most of all I can't stop thinking how unfair this is, especially on the kids, feel like having a full blown strop! Does anyone know if someone like Macmillan or breast cancer care have some sort of counselling service or if there's anything available through bcn as I really need to get some of this off my chest (pardon the pun) and it's not fair to offload onto family?

Hope everyone else is OK.

Hi all. on the trolley.

1step, arrghhhhhh! Yes, bcn and Macmillan can put you in touch with counsellor people to talk to, and that Breast Cancer Care charity has trained people to ring up too. PS believe it or not, your odds are still 90% with the latest regimes, thus far on what we know. Hugs.

A quick message as need to dash out to collect boy from youf club, and it'll take youngest ages to get into shoes ... But didn't want to read and not say anything. So sorry you've had this news, It must be such a shock. YES, you can get support/someone to talk to through Macmillans etc. Also BCN. Why not just phone the no you have for her tonight, leave amessage and say you need to talk asap. it's part of their role. In a general way you can phone any of the mental health charities on their nos. I'm not suggesting for a min you have a MH prob, just thinking that if you need to offload and rail against the world tonight (a totally normal response to all this) then you might get a more immediate answer, and they all have the listening skills you need. I'm sure someone else with more knowledge of the bc side of things will be along in a little time. In Scotland we have Maggie's centres which are greatfor this, the emotional side of a cancer dx, as you can just drop in, and they are starting to open up centres in England. Much depends where you are. There are only a few just now, I think. Sorry, must go. Take care, all.

1step that is a lot to take in. (hugs) strop away on here, we will listen. Hard waiting for scans again, hope they get done quickly.

Grabs from amber, I'm cooked. I don't know, I spend the day out and so much has happened.

Ned I should have been in Dorchester at the weekend if I hadn't booked this flight, oops. My brother lives in a village nearby. Missed neice's christening! I will come down soon to see her, though it is difficult to get there without a very long drive.

smee yay for drain removal.

Bugger about the nodes, 1Step. I know that's a blow, but look it's still only just over 50%, so v.good chance it hasn't breached through to anywhere else. Scans will be tough, but I'd bet will reassure you too. As Amber says you still have v.good odds. Fact it's hormone receptive is a big tick too, as that's another layer of things they can throw at it, and a fair few don't have that.

Oh and ring BCN first thing about counselling. I'd bet they have someone, and if not, she'll know where to go and should help you get in touch with them too. Do keep on talking here - honestly made a massive difference to me at your stage.

Would a glass of help? xx

1st my darling what a horrible shock for
You.
Echo all the others say about ringing for help (macmillans are fantastic if cant get through to anyone else). I am seeing equivalent of Bcn and A therapist - it does help (it isn't a quick fix but it does help).

And remember amber is right about how stats are very good with treatment and how much work/advances there are. But I know there is cold comfort there.

If you can tolerate it some wine or chocolate or whatever you can bear without being sick is probably best move. And I know it is a bit rich coming from me , but do try to keep

On which note, I have managed to eat something so feel less sick.

Any news from sparkle?

Youf club baskets - what is wrong with hanging round bus stops?

Thanks all, I'm going to contact bcn tomorrow and ask her advice. Going to try and have an early night, just hope I can switch off enough to get some sleep. I think part of me was secretly hoping that by having a mastectomy I wouldn't need all the other treatment and now I've got to face up to it. It's just really hard to come to terms with it all and at the same time try to carry on as normal for the kids.

Have been out all day and just trying to catch up, but wanted to send you lots of love and hugs 1step. It is a horrible shock when you get results like this, do talk to your bcn tomorrow (when I was in a similar situation to you, mine rang me every day just for a chat, maybe yours would do that - it really helps), MacMillan are also really good, - you could ring their helpline number for a chat on the phone, or they will be able to tell you who to contact locally for support.
Also - if you have a local cancer support centre, - they generally have trained people who are there to listen to you and offer support.

Lots of love to everyone, - catching up with all your posts. Take it easy Ned - there's plenty of room in my big slipper for anyone who cares to join me

Gig - meant to say, ginger, peppermint and lemon fruit teas are good for sickness - and work better if you alternate the flavours each time you have a cup.

Thanks kurri - hasn't thought of alternating them. Have sent you a pm.

1step poor love-it's a shock but take courage in what everyone has said,specially amber the stats queen - hope you get some sleep tonight and that you can get into some counselling -BCNs should be able to help point you in the right direction.
smee glad drain is out !
love to you all- am so tired but must watch Grandma's House.