21st TAMOXIFEN !!

[MaryAnnSingleton]

here we are- how did that happen ?

Gig - I somehow x-posted and missed your post about the drain thing, are you having that done soon? - It sounds good if it speeds up the healing. Also sounds as if they are trying hard to keep your rads on schedule, which is great

gig just guessing but I'd think they'd do it under a local.
autumn I seem to be sleeping quite deeply and waking up when I'm meant to (or thereabouts,usually at 5 or 6 am) but suddenly -so the dreams are very much with me for a while- this morning I had to lie in bed for another 50 mins to unwind.

They can stay with me for a bit as well. I'm usually quite good at interperiting the really bad ones as my subconcious trying to point out serious problems that I want an end to, or similar things. It's just that my subconcious seems to have built a rather elaborate dreaming world where a lot of the places and faces are the same but the events always change.

Sometimes it's warped versions of reality or other places I've never been. They flip between a shopping centre, a strange airport, a mansion, a train line, a creepy pool at night and a place that is full of flowers that are too bright. The first block of flats I ever lived in also appears in a weird post-apocalyptic setting too.

Sometimes really horrible things happen and there is always a sense of underlying dread, It can be really hard to shake off.

Hi all, and some new friends too. I am so far behind, I always lose track of you all over the weekends.....sorry.

I hope you all manage to enjoy the lovely sunny day.

Smee - I am wondering when you are off?

mm,sounds familiar autumn
Waves to sparkle !

Flight's early afternoon on Sunday, Sparkle.

How was your weekend?

soon smee !!! exciting !!

Ooh yes, let's do a Cerne Abbas giant! PLEASE!!!!

There is something in this Fen thing. There's a bit along the A14 where there is nothing for MILES except a few houses strung out along the road occasionally - and then, all of a sudden - for no apparent reason, there is a large naughty underwear factory outlet. Can't remember the name of the place but I think it is just sort of where Cambridgeshire meets Norfolk. Obviously not much to do out there

Smee - we are doing the Tudors one too, and I am quite excited about it myself. The car I am trying today is metallic blue and very shiny - not brand new, about a year old. I need a new one because my CD player has packed up and I can't drive without music. Colour and sound system are the only things that count, as well all know .

Night mares - ooh yuk. Starts the day off badly. What a shame, MAS.

Belated good wishes and hand holding for Autumn....

Morning all from sunny warm Essex.

I've finally got out of bed and hauled myself downstairs following a bout of the dreaded D&V bug that's doing the rounds at school. So far everyone else at home has escaped it. I feel a bit more normal today but have not yet been tempted to eat anything. The thought of food makes me feel quite ill.

KK, I hope you take the next few days nice and easy. It's so easy to overdo things and not realise till it hits you in the face and knocks you for six.

MAS, sympathies re rotten dreams. It must be awful waking up feeling distrubed by them, rather than all refreshed and awake.

Smee, what sort of weather are they having in NY? I can imagine how excited you are!!!!

Topsy, that was a lot of alcifrol!!!! Has your head settled? I hope Junior Topsy's outburst was a one-off but I very much doubt it. Is he talking to his dad yet?

Waves to everyone else and apologies for missing peeps out. I'm feeling very odd and lightheaded - off to find something to eat. I may be some time....

Oo Figgy I hope you are all right, rest lots, don't do too much.

Smee - busy weekend, thank you. Went to my mums on Saturday and sorted out some of her plumbing, to get her central heating back working again before the surveyor comes to do full structural survey for her purchasers. Then took dc swimming again, to empty pool, on sunday...lots of fun, but I was gald when I could drop off the older two at school this morning

I am off to google weather in NY. My aunt, who is from Toronto, which is not that far away from NY when you consider the size of the continent, says they are having unseasonably warm spring, normally expected to be -5 at this time and is closer to 17 at the mo...bodes well for you.

oh figgy poor love- hope you feel better very soon...
Am trotting out to the post office soon, just having a bit of lunch...

Snorting at the thought of kk sneaking round to the neighbours in the dead of night , with a can of weed killer drawing out an accurate replica of the cerne giant

Get well soon figgy

Autumn what did doc say?

Figgy hope you feel better. Any illness that involves not eating is vile.
Think procedure goes involve ga but frankly if it helps this heal quicker then fine.

Smee -what is weather like?

Kurri i love the giant idea.

Mas- I hate it when dreams are like that. It's a double bind as you have bad sleep and are niggled at by your worst fears when you should be resting.
Mini gig did 10.30 -4.30 then 5-7 so not bad but was asleep most of yesterday. She is now asleep as is my mum as I try to get big gig to rest who I am sure is coming down with something.

Nanny also off with bad period problems (I realize this is a first world problem). I have slightly limited sympathy as this has gone on for ages and she seems to have fruitless trips to gp to fix and spirit of selfishness at minute I need reliable help (am now stressing over who can cover weds If she isn't here as both my mum and dh can't do the Mornjng). I know this is immensely selfish as I am so lucky to have this help.

goodness gig you aren't selfish at all- you have loads on your plate and deserve some help- hope she is ok for Wednesday. (and that mini gig sleeps and midi gig is ok)

Feel better soon fig

gig, MAS is right on.

Doc says that my cervix looks red and "not right" and that she thinks I have a thing with my urinary tract. There is no infection there (inspite of leokocytes in urine) so she's sending me to a gynocologist rather than for an ultrasound because whatever is wrong is affecting both womany bits and urinary tract. Not sure why it would take her a week to tell me that. Or wether a gyn can tell you about your urinary tract. i thought that urologists did that.

She assured me that she would hurry my gyn referal and that if I haven't heard in a week then I was to call back. I'm not happy about it in the least but I'm half-past give a shit at the moment. I'm just appreciating the lovely weather and embracing the stronger painkillers. My tonsil infection is still going strong after a week with antibacs so she gave me stronger ones. I wish it would go away. I'm starting to sound like Kathleen turner!

Hope everything went OK at the doctor's Autumn, and you have some answers.

Gig - you're not being selfish, - the logistics of juggling appointments and child care are the things that stress you out at times like this. Hope nanny is recovered soon so you can relax a bit.

I think we should get a team together for the drawing of the Giant in next door's lawn. You can all come to mine for tea and FBS then we will sneak out in the night - dressed in black with balaclavas obviously

Figgy - you poor thing, D&V bug sounds awful, take it very slowly while you recover, - make sure you get plenty of fluids even if you can't manage any food atm. These bugs are one of the hazards of working in a school aren't they (the children I worked with used to regularly pass on nits as well )

Sometimes - at the kinky Fens underwear factory. It is a very spooky kind of landscape, all those miles of flatness - no wonder there are weird stories about people doing the rounds. (I'm sure in reality people from the Fens are perfectly ordinary, but I can see how legends might have arisen - it is the kind of place where you could get lost and seriously panic!)

How was the test drive?

Sparkle - I think I missed that your mum was moving, does she have a house lined up to move into? My mum is keen to sell her house, she said she doesn't want to spend another winter there, but I think it's going to be a mammoth task getting it ready to sell, and finding somewhere suitable for her to move.

topsy - I remember those stand offs between my DS when he was a teenager and his Dad - am sure your two will be talking again soon. It is like deer clashing their antlers to test who is boss

x-posted Autumn - very frustrating all this waiting and being passed around from one doctor to another, I hope your appointment comes through soon. I would think a gynae will also know about urinary tract (probably more so than a urologist will know about gynae, so you've probably got the better option there and hopefully they'll start sorting things out for you). If you feel you want an ultrasound though, ask the consultant when you see her/him.

You are right to enjoy the sunshine, and put it out of your mind. ?

Afternoon all.
Yes please to if there's one going.

I am very proud of myself!! I have walked for an hour and a half round the Dorney lakes circuit with dh this afternoon! At a fair old pace, too. That's the most walking I've done since this whole silly business started in Jan 11. Such a sense of triumph. And not any problems with silly heart either

That's certainly worth a amber in fact a - well done you, you should be very proud, that is some achievement

You have every reason to be proud of yourself, Amber. I'd have been scared stiff, worried that something might happen half way round. I think it was very brave of you. Hopefully this means that whatever the problem was, it's settled down a bit. I really hope so.

Gig, I think you've every right to be feeling a tad selfish, considering everything you've been through. I hope your nanny manages to cover Wednesday for you.

Autumn, hopefully the gynae referral wil shed some light on things.

KK, I've managed to avoid nits since I've been back at school in September despite lots of itchy heads in our class. It's daft but the school policy is NOT to send out class letters any more. Our teachers get round it by posting a note on our classroom window which all our parents have to walk past. Mind you, not many appear to take notice - it's rife at the moment.

Had a piece of dried French bread and feel a bit better.

Figgy big sympathy - d and v sucks but managing any food a start.

Amber am also impressed at your walking.

Kurri another midsomer fan i see.

Autumn - how frustrating! I do hope you get a quick appt as this is ridiculous. And sympathy to you if still got tonsilitis.

Sure will get cover for Wednesday and thanks for sympathy. Am not one of those horrid employers honestly - just bit self interested! I am going to try not to wobble before wednesday and think of it as positive but I do feel this whole thing has been a set back and won't get through this . As said before my concerns on dx didn't cover how tricky surgery and recovery was.

Big gig seems to be ok (amazing the powers of calpol and being indulged).

Well day 1 back at work went surprisingly well. My boss called me to his office as soon as I got in where I proceeded to trip going through the door and nearly landed at his feet and give the man a heart attack in the process :o We had a nice chat and he asked how things were and told me if they could help in any way they would. I told him about Ms Deranged (good name btw) wanting to know why I hadn't told her. He was horrified.

As predicted, she pulled a chair over to my desk, proceeded to tell me how ill she was with a sore throat and said 'well tell me all' at which stage my boss opened his door and said 'Gracie I need that report within the hour so could you start it now'. :o Clever man - He didn't actually send me the report to this afternoon. The only other time I was speaking to her was when she came up and said 'oh you have to give me all your passwords for the confidential files seeing as you are going to be off'. I reckon my look said it all and she beat a hasty retreat (without the passwords).

Sometimes Really appreciate the candle. That is so thoughtful of you. Hope you enjoy your shiny new car.

Something that made me chuckle today was, I had a lovely colleague, young enough to be my son, sits opposite me and was asking how I was, etc. I was laughing and saying our little part of the office had been really unfortunate in the past 6 months (there are 4 of us and in the last 6 months there have been 2 family deaths, 2 serious illnesses and now my diagnosis) and I told him I was going to ask for a transfer. Dear love him he said 'I know its awful I have fallen off my bike 3 times in the last 3 weeks'. Really made me chuckle.

Hope everyone had a lovely day. Weather here was fab.

Round of applause and whooping for Amber. That must feel brilliant.

Gig you're not at all selfish. Must be so annoying and another stress you could do without. Really hope she's okay for Wednesday. Hope the Calpol keeps working its magic on BigGig.

Autumn, still more waiting. Blimey.. Not good to have it all hanging over you.

• Poor you, Figgy. Bug sounds vile. Hope the food stays down and you're on the up again tomorrow.

Weather in NY is currently like here, though long range forecast says rain. Who cares, it's NY!!

Can I come on the raid before I go, Kurri? Got a balaclava - it's got a bobble on it, but hey needs must. Also a head torch from camping. Will look suitably insane.

Hope you're all tucked up warm. Nip in the air that's for sure. brrr..

x posted, but hooray for Gracie not being in a cell. Your boss sounds v. sweet.