TAMOXIFEN ****20****

[KurriKurri]

Hello ladies, - just taking the plastic wrapper off a brand new thread

Flinging crime eggs and yorkie bars on trolley , as I return from a run round the park. Topsy making me laugh today! Think your comments should be followed by a fnarr fnarr!

Probably, I'm with you on the waiting, its awful, and I'm waiting with you (in a supportive but invisible fashion!)

And Ned you deserve all the loveliness and more, you're not milking it, although I know what you mean. Try to make the most of it my dear, nice to have a dr lovely and not a Dr knobber! X

can I grizzle a bit ? am not having the best day because I had a disturbing dream then decided to lie in my bed for an extra 50 mins to get my bearings so everything out of kilter. Am going to book group which means I am spending too long trying to look half decent-I always feel that I must look dreadful and everyone else looks fine-am trying not to change my clothes endlessly. It means I can't settle to work and on top of that my jaw still aches...waaaa. Thank you.

Aww MAS, grizzle away. I thought I was the only person who changes 453 times before leaving the house, its considerably worse with a skewed body image I think. Fwiw, I bet all my crime eggs you look great in anything. Just go for comfy. A safe outfit. X

aw thanks holsten

MAS, I'm the same - I was just anxting about going to the post office as I feel I look such a wreck. Your dream sounds horrid, and toothache's bound to wear you down. Is that not any better then??

I think the toothache is more because I'm thinking of it- I need to stop that and see what happens !
Mum wants me to find a music case for my dad- one of those lovely old fashioned ones with a metal bar-I used to have my grandpa's.

Poor MAS! I bet you look absolutely dandy. Try not to fret about it, most people never think about what other people are wearing anyway. Isn't it odd how a dream can put a whole day off balance sometimes?

Jaw still painful? Do you think you are grinding or clenching your teeth? Mouthguards can be a good investment [disclaimer: mine was crap]

Probably waiting is the worst

Mas sorry you had a wobble. I would imagine that once the doubts creep in , it's hard to stop.

Ned glad they are treating you with kid gloves. Quite right that they are taking good care of you (only reaction sweet fuck all from my surgery- lucky I do have resources to cope but makes me for those that might not. ).

Am done in and meant to be going out tonight so going to raid FBs before an afternoon on sofa with mini gig.

In terms of what-to-wear angst, if it's of any help to make you feel better, I have a 50th birthday party to go to on Saturday night, in London, and I have been dreading this problem so much I am only just starting to let myself panic think about it . I have put on another half a stone since before Christmas and hardly any of my clothes fit but I don't feel like buying anything new at this size (20?). There will be lots of old friends I haven't seen for ages. Would love to look a glam, poised, nearly-50 but know there is no chance of pulling that off. I have a red 'party' dress I bought recently (from a charity shop) that doesn't quite fit and shows my bra but am thinking of wearing it anyway. With a nice comfy black cardi on top to cover up the bits of flesh bulging out. Lovely . I did buy some of those 'magic' pull-em-up-to-your-bra-height knickers from M&S yesterday but they didn't make me look suddenly slim when I tried them on, unfortunately! Should I ask for a refund? And lets's not even start on the sore feet/comfy shoes/party shoes conundrum....[sigh] Oh well, I am looking forward to having a good natter with some lovely women and maybe a bit of a boogie .

(ps: my male friends are lovely too)

Hi ladies, I hope you don't mind me posting on your thread but I stumbled across it recently whilst trawling the Internet for info on breast cancer. I've never posted on any forum before but would really like some advice.

To cut to the chase I had mammogram, ultrasound and core biopsies last week after finding a hardened mass in my breast. Got my results today and I've got lobular cancer. Been overloaded with information and need to make major decisions about which type of surgery to opt for but it's so difficult when I'm still reeling from the diagnosis.

I need to decide whether to have an MRI to assess whether a lumpectomy is feasible or go straight for a mastectomy. They've also said I could opt for reconstruction at the same time. I know no-one can make my decision for me and think I'll probably go for a mastectomy but just wondered if anyone had experienced being in a similar situation?

My breast cancer nurse told me about the forums on another website being a good source of support but to be honest I find it a bit overwhelming, so decided to post here instead as you seem such a friendly group :). I wanted to post whilst I've been waiting for my results but couldn't pluck up courage.

Any info or advice you can offer would be greatly appreciated.

And if I don't wear my falsie one half of the dress bodice fits perfectly but I am lopsided, but if I wear it the whole bodice is far too 'full' as I am top-heavy. waah!

maswibble away !
Body image us definitely shot to hell in this house . Doesn't help that in my previous life I was obviously such a floozy that all my neck lines are too low now . And Bobby the Booby keeps trying to poke its way out of my tops !

Today I have managed to Hoover and wash my floors . Am feeling very pleased with my domestic prowess .

Oh and have also spent the day discussing , via email with a friend , the physical attributes thespian abilities of a male actor in a program we both watched .

A productive day I feel

lime you will look lovely in red (I've seen your picture !) - dressing up is such a kerfuffle - I just have to feel 'right' and I don't often achieve that- I just find it so difficult. Sorry,though,it seems very trivial in the scheme of things.

1step you are more than welcome to join us- very sorry that you have to,but I think we're much less scary than the forums ! I'm pretty sure someone will be along with info. about lobular bc. It is a huge shock to be diagnosed and if there's anything we can help with just ask away...

which actor topsy ?? In the dentist on Monday we were talking about the merits of Benedict Cumberbatch (the nurse was quite taken with him)
Am sure I do grind my teeth and clench my jaws when tense- maybe I've been doing that.

Hello 1st and welcome .
Sorry to hear of your diagnosis . I was diagnosed with breast cancer last may , had mastectomy and node clearance in June . Followed by chemo and rads . Am now on 8 weekly CT scans as I have lung nodules that the oncs are keeping an eye on .

I allowed myself to be led by my surgeon and my oncologist as to what treatment I should have . As I had absolutely no idea about cancer treatments , and had my head firmly buried in the sand !

There are ladies on this board who have had every treatment path you can think of , so whatever you decide upon there will be someone who can give you advice and tips.

Keep posting

It was the actor in Monday's episode if Scott and Bailey . He played a uniformed policeman and he used to be in Eastenders .
I am sure that the uniform had nothing to do with our interest ...

Am also a fan of Mr Cumberbatch , purely for his brains ...

Thanks mas and topsy for your quick replies. It is a huge shock to the system even though I tried to prepare myself for it.

My next hurdle is telling my eldest dc when he gets home. I don't want to burden him but I know it's better to be honest with him. Do you think my youngest (3) is still too young to realise there's anything going on?

Welcome 1step, I wasn't offered the choice of a lumpectomy because they thought my lump was too big for a good result but they did give me the choice of a mastectomy or reconstruction. I went for the mastectomy just because that could be done sooner and think it was the right decision for me. I probably will have a reconstruction at some point as the one sided look is a bit peculiar but I just wanted the tumour removed as soon as possible.

Ned - glad your feeling better this time. I also find Emend gives me less constipation so thats another good thing.

14K -great result. Hope probably and angry feet have similar outcomes.

Topsy - you must be so proud of your daughter and hope you enjoy your weekend away.

MAS - hope you enjoy the bookclub - I am sure no-one else will be bothered what your wearing.

Waves to everyone else.

Oh 1step you poor thing, I remember well that reeling shock and feeling unable to make the decisions about surgery too. I just wanted someone to tell me 'this is what you should do' but of course they can't. Try telling the breast care nurses how hard you are finding the decision? Would having an MRI cause much of a delay and would this matter? I'm afraid I don't know anything about lobular - was ductal myself. Hope someone can give you some good advice.

This board is deffo more likely to help and less likely to increase panic than some other places .

Hi ladies,

Bit of a nightmare today and it is not over yet sadly. 2 hour wait to see the consultant then he asked me to go downstairs for an ultrasound but when we got down there the doctors were all having some sort of cancer conference for the day so they gave me an appt for 11 days time. Grrr! Anyway we then realised our private healthcare has come through from DHs company so we called and I managed to get an appt at the local private hospital at 4.45 today. However they will do the ultrasound but will probably refer me onto the breast specialist who isn't in until Tuesday (same man as I saw at the first hospital).

The consultant I saw this morning said it didn't feel suspicious but best to check and the area was nodular as was the other breast but one side was slightly thicker than the other. I knew this from when I saw them 8 years ago though.

Sooo I will get back to you this evening but I doubt it will all be done and dusted today sadly :( Would have been nice to have a weekend completely free of worry.

how old is your eldest 1step?
I think the others will agree that when telling children it's better to drip feed information, so don't say 'mummy has cancer' or something similar, just step by step,that you're having an operation to start with and take it from there.

1step - there is a booklet on the breast cancer care site you can use to help little ones understand what is going on. Kids might not understand what is going on but I think it is a good idea to tell them something as my two certainly knew something was up and it upset one in particular. He is alot older (nine) but definitely did improve once we explained why Mum and Dad were a bit stressed!